Expecting the Doctor's Baby
Page 16
“Don’t hesitate to call if you need anything.” She waved on her way out the door.
“So,” Mitch said, “I’ll see about getting you signed out then I’ll take you home.”
“Don’t bother. I’ll call someone—”
“No, you won’t.”
“First of all you’re working. You can’t just leave.”
“It’s a slow night. If it doesn’t stay that way, one of the other guys in the group can cover the rest of my shift.”
The look she gave him was meant to intimidate but made her look more like a lost kitten. “I meant it when I said I don’t want anything. Let’s just agree to disagree and move forward. Separately. That’s best for both of us—”
The door opened and Arnold Ryan stood there. Great, Mitch thought. It should have made him feel better that a bigger jerk than himself had just arrived. Funny how he just knew the situation was headed even further south.
“Samantha? What’s going on?” Ryan demanded.
“Dad.” Sam pushed herself up a little higher in the bed. “What are you doing here?”
“I was in my office and got a call that you were in the E.R. Are you all right?”
“Yes.”
He looked at Mitch. “Tell me the feeling I have that you’re somehow involved is completely wrong.”
“Dad, it’s not what you think. I—”
“Don’t tell me what I think,” he snapped.
So much for rest and relaxation, Mitch thought. “Look, Mr. Ryan, she needs to take it easy. Just give her a break—”
“Stay out of this, Doctor. It’s between me and my daughter.”
And me, he thought. “I’m not going to stand here and watch you bully her. Give her a break or—”
“Stop,” Sam said. She looked up at him. “I’ll handle this.”
“You need to rest,” he reminded her.
“Will someone kindly tell me what’s going on?” Ryan demanded.
Sam looked at her father. “I’m here because I’m bleeding, Dad.”
He frowned. “Was there an accident? Samantha, you drive too fast. I’ve always told you to slow down—”
“There was no accident,” Mitch said, reading the irony of those words in Sam’s eyes.
“I’m going to have a baby,” she said bluntly. “I was spotting, but the doctor was just here and says there’s no reason to think there’s a problem with the pregnancy. I just have to take it easy. And before you ask, Mitch is the father.”
It was the first time Mitch had ever seen Arnold Ryan shocked into silence. If only it would last.
Anger burned bright in the other man’s eyes. “Samantha, I’m extraordinarily disappointed in you. I brought you up better than this.”
As a doctor Mitch had taken an oath to do no harm and he’d never wanted to break that vow more than he did now. “You’re disappointed because she’s pregnant? Or because she was with me?” he asked. “If Jax the jerk was the father would that make it okay?”
“He’d do the right thing by Samantha and marry her,” Ryan said, disapproval flashing in his eyes. “What are your intentions toward my daughter?”
“I don’t think that’s any of your business—”
Ryan took a step forward. “I’m making it my concern.”
“I would never hurt Sam.”
“You don’t think getting her pregnant is hurting her—”
“Dad, please…”
He ignored her. “Don’t make the mistake of thinking that this…personal involvement with my daughter will bulletproof your career, Dr. Tenney. You’re still on probation and one false move—”
“Dad, this isn’t the time.”
Ignoring her, Ryan continued his tirade. “If you so much as look at anyone the wrong way, you’re gone, Doctor. Samantha is having a difficult enough time getting her life on track. Thanks to you, now she has to deal with this. I really don’t—”
“Dad—” The sharpness of her voice got his attention and she took a deep breath. “I’ve had enough of you belittling me and my job. It stops right now.”
He looked genuinely shocked. “Samantha, you’ve never spoken to me that way before.”
“Then it’s past time I did.” She met his gaze. “I need you to stop giving me orders. You can’t tell me who to marry or what to do. I’m a grown woman. I’m going to be a mother. I’ll be responsible for my child. You’re going to be a grandfather and I want you to be a part of my life, but not if you tell me how to run it.”
Go, Sam, Mitch thought. For the life of him he couldn’t wipe off the smug, almost satisfied grin he knew was on his face.
“Samantha, what are you saying?”
Her expression was firm and clearly indicated she would tolerate no argument. “If you can’t say nice things, and only nice things, I want you to leave. And I don’t want to see you until you can.”
“You don’t mean that.”
“On the contrary, I’ve never meant anything more.”
Ryan shot an angry parting look at her. Without further acknowledgment of Mitch, he turned and left the room.
Mitch wanted to pump his arm and holler “Way to go.” He couldn’t be more proud of Sam, but then he saw the tears sliding down her cheeks.
“Don’t cry, Sam.”
He sat on the side of the bed and pulled her into his arms. She was a hell of a roller-coaster ride. First she’d scared the crap out of him. Then she’d told her pompous, arrogant father where to get off.
And now she was crying. He couldn’t stand it when she cried. And it was his fault. If not for him, her relationship with her family wouldn’t be in jeopardy. If not for him, she wouldn’t be pregnant and there’d have been no reason for the scene she’d just been through. She sniffled and her shoulders shook from the effort to pull herself together.
He hated that he was responsible for upsetting her. Almost as much as he’d hated seeing her in a hospital bed, a trauma that had reduced him from respected doctor to a mere mortal man scared for the woman he cared too much about.
He hated it because it was a symptom that he was in deep trouble.
Sam was so confused.
In her apartment, sitting with her feet up on her chenille corner group, she watched Mitch banging pots and pans in the kitchen and wondered how this had happened. One minute she’d been lying in a hospital bed in his arms trying to make herself push him away. Not an hour later he’d insisted on carrying her upstairs to her place. He was one burly medic she didn’t mind having haul her around.
That pesky romantic streak had made her putty in his hands. How ironic was that? She’d taken two independent steps forward with the ultimatum to her father and so many back that she couldn’t even see independence from where she was sitting.
She’d tried to tell Mitch to go away but couldn’t be sorry he’d ignored her.
“Dinner is just about ready.”
He leaned a broad shoulder against the wall just outside the kitchen and folded his arms over his chest. In jeans and a T-shirt he looked more delicious than any food he was whipping up. The fact that she still thought so even after the way he’d acted about the pregnancy put her pretty high up on the pathetic scale.
“I’m not very hungry,” she said.
“You need something. You’re eating for two.” He went back in the kitchen, making further argument a challenge.
If only he’d reacted this way when she’d told him about the baby. She glanced at the expanse of beige carpet on the other side of her coffee table and thought about the night that passion for Mitch had made her go up in flames and resulted in the new life inside her. She’d been conflicted about this child until the possibility of losing it became very real. A powerful feeling of protectiveness came over her and she knew she’d lie, cheat, beg or steal to take care of this baby.
Mitch brought a tray with a bowl of split pea soup and a ham sandwich from the kitchen and set it on her lap. The smell of the soup she normally loved turned her stomach.
“It’s good for you—”
“I don’t care. I’m telling you the baby doesn’t like it and if it’s not gone in ten seconds you’ll be sorry.” She put her hand over her mouth.
“Okay.” He took it out of her sight, then came back and sat on the coffee table beside her. “Tell me what sounds good.”
“Peanut butter.”
“Coming right up.”
He disappeared and returned a few minutes later with a sandwich.
“Thank you.” It actually tasted good and made her realize she was hungry. After eating most of it, she said, “I don’t mean to be a diva, but there are some smells that just set off the nausea.”
“It’s not like I’ve never seen anyone get sick,” he pointed out.
True. But it wasn’t high on her list of things to do in front of him. “Still, I’d rather avoid the experience if at all possible.”
“I understand.” He took the tray back in the kitchen, then returned with a cup of tea and handed it to her.
“Let’s get one thing straight. You don’t have a clue.” She vigorously dunked the tea bag in the mug of hot water. “You have no idea how it feels to be pregnant. You can’t possibly understand what it feels like to be accused of…well, the things you implied. And that begs the question. If you believe I’m capable of such despicable behavior, why are you here being nice to me?”
“Because it’s my baby.”
She wasn’t sure what had changed for him, but the disappointment trickling through her was very identifiable. His presence here had nothing to do with any feelings for her and she so wanted it to be about that.
“I see.”
“No, you don’t.” He let out a long breath. “But I owe you an explanation.”
“That’s all right. I get it. You’ve been great, but I’m fine now. You should go—”
“I’ll go if that’s what you want, but not before you agree to hear me out.”
They stared at each other for several moments and the expression in his eyes told her whatever he had to say was going to be bad. Suddenly she was afraid. She didn’t want to know, but knew she had to.
“All right.”
He nodded and held her gaze for a couple of seconds before saying, “My wife was pregnant.”
Of all the things it was possible for him to reveal that was the last thing she’d expected. “With your baby?” she blurted out.
“Yeah.”
“It’s just that I thought—When you talked about her—I just had the impression that she’d cheated on you—” And when she’d told him she was pregnant he’d felt the need to ask if it was his.
“She cheated, but not the way you mean.”
“I don’t understand.”
“You already know about my brother and how I tried to help him.”
She nodded. “And that she felt neglected. I thought you were saying that she’d turned to another man for attention.”
“I could have understood that.”
His eyes turned icy, desolate, and Sam gripped the mug until her knuckles turned white, grateful for the warmth. If only it could reach inside where she was the coldest. What could be worse than the woman you trusted cheating with another man?
As much as she didn’t want to know, the silence was unbearable. “What did she do?”
“Without discussing the idea with me she suspended all birth control and got pregnant. She came up with some song and dance about forgetting to take the Pill.”
“She got pregnant on purpose.” It wasn’t a question. She was almost afraid to ask. But like an accident on the side of the road, she couldn’t look away from this now. “What happened to the baby?”
“She said she miscarried. It wasn’t until after our divorce that she confessed what she’d done.”
“What?”
He met her gaze and the truth was there in the dark intensity of his eyes. “She got rid of it.”
Sam was shocked. She sat up straight and swung her legs over the side of the sofa. After setting her mug down, she whispered, “How could she do that to you?”
“To me?” His laugh was bitter. “She said it was all my fault. I was too preoccupied trying to save the world to pay any attention to her and she didn’t want to raise a child by herself.”
“Oh, Mitch—” So it was a trust issue after all, just not as simple as she’d believed. He’d been deceived in the most elemental and hurtful way. She reached out and put her hand on his arm. “I’m so sorry.”
“No, I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be.”
“I am. It had nothing to do with you, but the bad stuff was all right there, as if no time had passed. The feeling of being invisible, irrelevant, used. She stole something from me—not once but twice.” The anger was back in his voice when he said, “That day you told me about being pregnant…The news came out of left field. Again. It wasn’t my finest hour. I was wrong to take it out on you.”
“Maybe. But your reaction makes sense now.”
It made so much sense. The truth of the situation made her sick to her stomach all over again. She and the baby were a responsibility he in no way wanted. The fact that he was being sweet and solicitous only heightened her sadness and pain by giving her a glimpse of what might have been.
Mitch would never believe she hadn’t gotten pregnant in order to trap him. Without trust, love wasn’t possible.
“I’m so sorry all that happened to you.” That was an understatement, Sam thought. They might have had a chance if things had been different.
“It’s in the past. I don’t mean to whine.”
“It never crossed my mind that you were.”
He shrugged. “Just thought you should know.”
Was it better or worse now that she did? His anger wasn’t directed at her, but there was no way he’d ever care, and risk hurt and deception. And suddenly she just wanted to be alone. She was tired. The fear she was going to lose the baby had drained her and she wasn’t sure how long she could hold herself together. She’d cried in his arms twice when things with her father had gone badly. Who was going to hold her when she cried over Mitch?
“I’d like you to go,” she said.
He looked up, surprised. “What?”
“I’m worn out. It’s been a long day.”
“You go to bed, I’ll just hang here in case you need anything.”
“That’s not necessary. I’m fine.” That was a lie, but what else could she say? “Rest is what I need. Doctor’s orders.”
“I don’t want to leave you alone.”
He was going to force her to say the words. She needed a clean break because it hurt too much to have him there knowing she could never have him.
“Alone is better than being an obligation.”
“That’s not why I’m here,” he protested.
“I appreciate the lie, but we both know that’s all it is. What you went through was awful. And if I could change that I’d do it in a heartbeat. But the reality is that the past ate up too much of you and there’s nothing left over for me.”
“I want to take care of you.”
“And I want your love. I understand why it can’t happen, but I won’t settle for less.” Her throat felt tight and it was difficult to say the words. “So it’s better if you just go now.”
“Sam, you don’t mean it—”
“I do. Please, leave, Mitch.”
He stared at her for several long moments, his eyes going darker and more intense. “Are you sure about this?”
“Very.” She put more conviction into that one word than she would have thought possible. But, thanks to him, she was the new and improved Sam. She knew what she wanted and wasn’t afraid to say so. Let the chips fall where they may.
Finally he nodded, and stood. “You’ll call if you need me?”
What
she needed and always would from him he couldn’t give her. “If there’s anything you need to know, I’ll get in touch,” she promised.
He leaned down and she knew he was going to kiss her. She turned her face and his lips brushed her cheek.
“I don’t want to see you in my E.R. again.”
“Yes, sir.” She would never know how she managed to smile.
When the door closed behind him Sam felt more alone than she’d ever felt in her life. Her father would probably never speak to her again but she hadn’t been able to stand by and say nothing while he was putting down the man she loved. Her lashing out could very well cost her the only family she had.
Worse, she’d lost the love of her life, and the pain of that realization sliced clear to her soul.
Chapter Fourteen
“Are you all right, Mitch?”
He straightened the silverware on the white tablecloth. “Of course. Why do you ask?”
Ellen Tenney’s expression was wry as she looked across their table in Primo’s, a steak house at the Suncoast Hotel in Summerlin. “We haven’t exactly been close for a long time. Taking me to dinner is out of character.”
“Is it too much to ask that you could stop being a detective for a couple of hours and just relax?”
“It’s okay to ask, but I can’t promise anything. I look at patterns. I notice things. I ask questions.” She glanced around the elegant, second-floor dining room with floor-to-ceiling windows looking out on the lights stretching across the Vegas Valley. “And dinner here is a major red flag.”
“I can’t take my mom out for a nice meal?”
“I’m not complaining. But there are hundreds of places that would be nice. Primo’s is nice, if you know what I mean. That makes me ask questions. Like what’s going on with you?” She shrugged. “So sue me.”
In some weird way the fact his mother could still read him was cool. He felt like a drowning man going down for the third time. A week ago he’d left Sam after bringing her home from the E.R. He’d thought about calling her and every time he’d picked up the phone, he remembered the death of hope in her eyes. Warm optimism disappeared and he felt as if he’d stomped the stuffing out of Tinkerbell. He’d wanted her to understand why he’d acted like a jerk and now she did but it didn’t help much. Telling her hadn’t changed his past or the man he’d turned into because of it. He still tended to find trusting anyone a challenge.