Rage & Fury

by Darryl Hadfield

  “Lieutenant – congratulations. Thanks to your actions at the Battle of Slana,” Oh fuck, here we go again, “you have been granted several awards. Due to the nature of the awards, I’m not going to simply hand them to you, nor are we going to assemble here. You will be receiving orders shortly, to travel with me to Washington, DC, to see the president.”

  Oh fuck me, what had these idiots done?

  “If you hadn’t guessed, and I don’t think it gets much attention in basic, or in enlisted leadership schools, you’ve been awarded the Distinguished Service Cross, the Silver Star… and the Medal of Honor.”

  Fuck me. I did not want this much attention.

  “Sir, can I refuse this?”

  “No, you may not, Lieutenant.” He wasn’t smiling now. “We had our asses handed to us, and frankly, the unit – and the army in general – needs the morale boost. Refuse this and I will make your life a living hell.”

  “Sir, I was just-“

  “Shut up. I’ve reviewed the feed from your implant,“ waitWHAT? “and I’m aware of exactly what you did. So is the award committee, and so is the president.”

  “Sir, there were others who did as much or more than I did. I really don’t want this.”

  He stood, walked to the door and closed it. Then he turned to me.

  “WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? Some little shit off the streets comes into MY ARMY and has the FUCKING BALLS to say that?” I thought he was going to hit me, and I was seeing my career going down in flames already.

  “Sir-“

  “I SAID SHUT UP. You will accept this award, you will smile and handfuck every goddamn politician on this shitshow we’re about to leave for, and you will not breath a word of anything other than gratitude and humility, do you hear me?”

  “Yes sir.” Maybe I could rescue myself?

  “SPEAK THE FUCK UP YOU LITTLE SHIT!”

  “YES SIR!”

  “Get the fuck out of my office. Plane leaves at 0800, be at the AirFac no later than 0730.”

  I stood, saluted, and left in a hurry, closing his door behind me.

  Sergeant Major Ballard was leaning against the wall in the hallway, looking at me with an amused sound in his voice. “Hey Sir. Got some orders for you.” He smirked as he handed the paper in his hand over.

  17 AUG 2095

  In Re:Lieutenant James Wolf

  S/N 20690401142857

  Pursuant to general orders of the Commander, and as a result of actions at the Battle of Slana, 13 May 2135, Subject Soldier is awarded the Silver Star. Citation to follow under separate cover.

  Pursuant to general orders of the Commander, and as a result of actions at the Battle of Slana, 13 May 2135, Subject Soldier is awarded the Distinguished Service Cross. Citation to follow under separate cover.

  Pursuant to general orders of the Commander, and as a result of actions at the Battle of Slana, 13 May 2135, Subject Soldier is awarded the Medal of Honor. Citation to follow under separate cover.

  Subject soldier is hereby ordered to attend ceremony for presentation of awards under escort by regimental commander, 19 August 2135. Air Travel to be coordinated by unit logistics soonest.

  …

  “Nicely done, Sir. The citations are, to say the least, impressive.”

  “Smaj, don’t you start with me, please!”

  He sighed. “Come with me Sir. We need to have a discussion.”

  We went into his office, and he shut the door behind me as I sat sown. Then, surprisingly, he didn’t sit behind his desk – he sat down in the other guest chair after turning it towards me.

  “James,” he began – he was after all, the RSM, and not some piddly little corporal or sergeant, “you need to learn sometimes that there’s more to this world than just your piece of it.”

  I must have looked confused.

  “Seriously. The colonel – who is under a LOT of stress right now because he’s lost a full third of his command – was trying to get the point across that HE needs this award. It shows that you – yes, among others – as one of his soldiers, had the skill, the courage, the will, to do what needed to be done, and save a lot of other people. In many ways, that reflects well on him, you know.”

  “That’s fucked up.”

  “Yes, it is, but it’s the human condition. Get used to it. I’ve heard that OCS will ram that down your throat even more, but it’s important. What’s also important is, you deserve the awards. Probably even more, too.”

  “Seriously, Smaj, stop that shit.”

  “You’ll understand a little better when you hear the citations – and you will, when you get the awards in person. By the way, you’re probably going to have to leave Rage behind; the secret service is a little antsy about weapons that close to the president, especially in the hands of someone who’s already as dangerous as you’ve shown. I know you’ve had a rough start, but you’ve done some pretty impressive things in the last seven or eight years, James. Bradburry’s impressed – Oh yes, I passed on the information to him – and, frankly, so am I. I’ll offer you the same guidance that the colonel did – shut up, accept the award, and do so graciously. Trust me, doing otherwise is going to be even more trouble for you.”

  I shut up, closing my eyes, sighing, and shook my head. Looking back up at him, I asked him about the only question I could think of. “Fine. Will you hold onto my Rage for me?”

  I don’t think I’d ever seen him surprised like that before. “Uh.. sure, sir?”

  “Thanks.”

  I had to prepare myself mentally as well as physically for the trip. The mental part is probably self-explanatory; the physical was… something I hadn’t really expected. Haircut, now… Ballard had told me to use depilatory cream, or, have someone else shave me the morning of the ceremony. I had to move fast, though, because we were leaving in the morning, and I hadn’t really done much with a dress uniform before – I hadn’t touched it since the small graduation parade from basic training, and now… it wasn’t even the right one. I had to have my dress uniform, and it was notably different for an officer, than enlisted. I’d asked Ballard if I could just wear my simpler enlisted uniform (which had never even seen my Sergeant rank, since that was a battlefield promotion), but he just laughed and said I’d better toddle along to the quartermaster and see if they had a uniform I could buy. “Buy? You mean have.”

  “Nope, you’re an OCCIFER now, sir. You get to buy your shit.”

  I’d normally used my salary to cover simple stuff – like drinks at the bar, or something minor (in a cost sense, anyway) like books, audio/video entertainment, etc… but I’d never gotten close to spending all of it. I did buy a uniform – and all the other crap I had to buy - from the quartermaster, that even fit fairly well. It wasn’t perfect, but it’d work. Officers had to wear this stupid looking cover – I hated it from the moment I saw it; the tab came to a bit over a thousand bucks (hey, I bought the premium shit, so sue me!), which made… not very much of a dent in my bank account. I was probably going to have to figure out something to do with all that cash, at some point. Ballard was, also, wrong – at least partly. While I did have to buy the uniform, the quartermaster told me to expect to see a ‘change’ to my uniform allowance since officers got more than enlisted – to offset the greater costs of their uniforms.

  I got a laugh; the regimental badge I got for my new uniform had a little piece of paper in it talking about the regiment. “We’ll do it”? What kind of goofy motto is that?

  0800 the next morning, I met the Colonel – still in a foul mood – at the airfac at 0800. We had a small VIP jet waiting that was going to take us to DC; it was only a three hour flight, give or take, and I have to admit it felt… very awkward, taking Rage off my belt and handing it to Regimental Sergeant Major Ballard.

  He nodded as he took it, and watched as the Colonel and I boarded the plane.

  By the time we’d landed in DC and got local ground transport to the local base, it was after lunch. We had all kinds of people �
�� civilians, mostly – harassing us nonstop about when to sit, when to stand, who to address and in what order, HOW… I hated it, from beginning to end. Turns out the people dressed in suits weren’t ALL civilians… I caught a quick glimpse of one with a pistol tucked inside his belt, when his jacket slipped, and I was moving immediately. The man saw me coming, a quizzical look on his face, and then went to draw the pistol.

  “COLONEL GET DOWN!”

  I was on the guy, elbow coming up and blasting the poor guy in the jaw and knocking him out with his weapon only half drawn. I turned to look for any other assailants, and saw two others with pistols drawn, as I spun the assailant’s body around to shield me as I drew his weapon, dragging the now-limp body in front of the colonel.

  “Oh for fuck’s sake, Wolf, stand down.” He sounded pretty pissed. When I didn’t, and just paused instead, he continued with, “They’re secret service agents you idiot. They’re here to protect us – although it looks like maybe they need you to protect them.”

  I let the body drop, slowly putting down the pistol on top of the man I’d just assaulted and knocked out. “Uhhh…. “ I looked at the other two, both with weapons drawn and pointed at me, “Sorry guys, I didn’t know..”

  That was… embarrassing, but how the fuck was I supposed to know???

  We managed to make it through the rest of that day’s briefing, and those of the next; as it turns out, they added another three guys to the detail – two of which were outside my door. I wasn’t sure if they were there to protect me, or make sure I didn’t fuck up anyone else due to not understanding how things worked here.

  I did catch the guy I assaulted, later that day, who was VERY wary of me as I approach. “Look man, I’m sorry – I’ve never been here before, I’m more than a little on edge, and honestly, my head’s still not fully back from deployment.”

  He took my apology grudgingly, but he did accept it. He never did talk to me very much, though. Pussy.

  Citation for the Silver Star

  Caught between the crossfire of an enemy that had ambushed the forward operating base he was at, then-Master Corporal Wolf S/N 20690401142857 put himself in the line of devastating enemy fire as he maneuvered to defend his platoon sergeant and platoon commander. He effectively employed his knowledge and skill, and saved the life of Lieutenant Manchin, but unfortunately was unable to save Sergeant Toomey. His audacious leadership and courageous example under fire inspired his men to fight at great risk to their own personal safety, resulting in the enemy's withdrawal, and his platoon's security within their forward operating base. Master Corporal Wolf’s personal courage, tactical expertise, and professional competence directly contributed to his platoon's overall success and survival. Master Corporal Wolf reflected great credit upon himself, First Battalion, the 148th Infantry Regiment, and the United States Army. For gallantry in action against an armed enemy, while serving as a rifle squad leader on 13 May 2135, Lieutenant Wolf is awarded the Silver Star.

  Citation for the Distinguished Service Medal

  Then-Sergeant Wolf S/N 20690401142857 distinguished himself by exceptionally valorous actions on 13 May 2135 while serving as a Platoon Sergeant during a combat mission near Slana, Croatia. During the early morning hours, then-Sergeant Wolf’s platoon received a massive assault by a large number of militant insurgents. Although more than 200 mortar rounds fell, Sergeant Wolf fearlessly moved through his unit area, first to alert his men, then to direct various phases of the defense. When insurgents broke through the perimeter, he rallied his and other men from to reinforce the failed areas, he himself roaming between multiple lines of battle. His rifle was disabled early in the action by small-arms fire, and he continued his mission with his sidearm. When his sidearm ran out of ammunition, Sergeant Wolf used his personal fighting knife in hand-to-hand combat, continuing to lead the defense. His professional command and courageous fighting throughout the battle were instrumental in turning back the numerically superior enemy force and killing more than 300 insurgents. Sergeant Wolf’s extraordinary heroism and devotion to duty were in keeping with the highest traditions of the military service and reflect great credit upon himself, his unit, and the United States Army. For courage and heroism in action against an armed enemy, while serving as a platoon sergeant on 13 May 2135, Lieutenant Wolf is awarded the Distinguished Service Cross.

  Citation for the Congressional Medal of Honor

  Then-Sergeant James Wolf, S/N 20690401142857, 148th Infantry Regiment, on 13 May 2135, near Slana, Croatia, commanded First Platoon A Company, First Battalion which together with the remainder of A company was attacked by over 300 enemy insurgents. Sergeant Wolf ordered his men to withdraw and prepare a position after the perimeter of the forward operating base was overrun, while he remained at his forward position to reconnaissance the area. While Sergeant Wolf continued his reconnaissance, his primary weapon was disabled by enemy fire. As he progressed towards the main body of enemy combatants, his secondary weapon ran out of ammunition. Sergeant Wolf became aware of a suicide bomber, heavily laden with explosives, proceeding towards his platoon’s stronghold position, and engaged the suicide bomber directly. Without any rifle or sidearm, Sergeant Wolf disabled and killed the enemy bomber. Bereft of life, the bomber’s suicide vest automatically engaged, counting down to explosion. Sergeant Wolf picked up the suicide bomber and ran to the far side of the base, saving his entire platoon, with no expectation of living through the end of the encounter. He threw the suicide bomber and took cover, at which point the explosion resulted in a serious injury that disabled him – and, at the same time, killing the few remaining insurgents in the area. Sergeant Wolf personally accounted for over 70 total enemy KIA, and while simultaneously saving the lives of over three dozen soldiers under his command. For Conspicuous gallantry and intrepidity at the risk of life above and beyond the call of duty in action against an armed enemy in theater of combat, while serving as a platoon sergeant on 13 May 2135, Lieutenant Wolf is awarded the Congressional Medal of Honor.

  The president hung each award around my neck after each citation was read – and the applause of the crowd in the White House got louder each time. After the final award as wrapped around my neck – like a noose, I thought – everyone in the room stood.

  What the fuck? This is bullshit. The first award had nothing at all to do with what actually happened, and the second two were for the same damn thing.

  Then Colonel Watts, sitting in front of the room, stood up and fucking saluted me - and everyone else in uniform in the room did likewise.

  What the fuck was wrong with these people?

  I found out afterward, I got nearly $1500 per month above and beyond the rest of my pay as a Lieutenant – shit, that was as much as I made per month as a private, and half of my pay as a lieutenant. Apparently I also was allowed to fly on military aircraft going anywhere, too, as long as there was space available, and I wasn’t doing it for some other job. Easy enough. I didn’t care about most of the rest of it – a 10 percent bump in my retirement pay, and burial at the Arlington National Cemetery? Big fuckin’ deal.

  I just wanted them all to shut up about it.

  Chapter 21: Going Home

  I didn’t mention much about it, but I was still damn sore after that suicide bomber left his mark on me. I suppose I shouldn’t complain – while I didn’t exactly walk away, I was still breathing – unlike him – and I was carted away on a stretcher, while they had to pick up pieces of him with a shovel and sometimes mop.

  I’d gotten past the light duty, but something still wasn’t right – I ended up in the base infirmary with dull pain across my lower back, and shooting pain in my upper back. The diagnosis? Despite light duty after the injury, despite feeling okay after it, I’d still somehow managed to tear some of the musculature under my skin loose. I got put on light duty, this time for another 6 months, while they did multiple surgeries and physical therapy after the fact. Apparently, it had something to do with me not stretching enough during post-inj
ury light duty (seriously? SERIOUSLY? Those assholes told me NOT to!) and now, I got to go through it all again, but this time with gradually increasing stretching.

  Fortunately for me, I was already used to doing a lot of stretching for my dojo workouts – which meant, of course, I wasn’t allowed to go to the dojo – I had to do the stretching, just the stretching, in the rehab center in the infirmary. That sucked, and it sucked hard, and my dick wasn’t involved so I hated it.

  I was finally done shortly after Christmas, and then I got another surprise - I knew there was going to be more hassle, too, and sort of expected it, but fortunately, it wasn’t all bad, and in fact, was something of a nice extra Christmas present.

  13 JAN 2096

  In Re:Lieutenant James Wolf

  S/N 20690401142857

  Pursuant to general orders of the Commander, and as a result of battlefield commission, 15 May 3136, Subject soldier is ordered to attend Officer Candidate School, Advanced Training Division of Logistics Command, Fort Mcclellan, GA. Course start date 30 Jan 2136.