Amish Winter of Promises: Book Four

by Samantha Jillian Bayarr

  “Ouch, that hurt.”

  “Ooh, don’t be such a baby. So, you gonna tell me how your day went? I’ll bet it would have been more fun if Elijah had been there today instead of in them fields over there with his papa.”

  “If I can’t tease you, then you can’t tease me either. And don’t say stuff like that, somebody might hear you. Then I’ll get in trouble for thinking on boys when I ain’t supposed to yet. I’ll make you a deal—if you’ll be keeping my secret, I’ll be keeping yours.”

  I pushed out my lower lip in an effort to stifle his laughter toward my seemingly hopeless situation.

  “You don’t gotta beg. Hang in there,” he said as he punched my arm again. “Maybe Papa will reconsider his decision next month when you turn sixteen. Who knows, maybe you could start coming to Sunday Night Singings if you’re lucky,” he added.

  “What in the world is a Sunday Night Singing’?”

  “Well if you hadn’t spent the first few months in your room after we moved here, pouting’ like a spoiled child, you would know more ‘bout what goes on around here,” he said, nodding his head and raising his eyebrow as though he had information that was privy to him alone.

  “Wait just a minute,” I interrupted. “The only reason I stayed in my room is because our parents moved me away before Bradley came to visit his grandma for the summer. I was just mad because I missed out on seeing him this year. After being somebody’s best friend for so many years, it ain’t easy giving him up, you know.”

  “You don’t gotta convince me. I know you miss Bradley, but you gotta move on with your life. You should’ve gotten his new address if you wanted to stay in touch with him. It ain’t easy, but you gotta learn to live with the mistake you made in not getting his address last year,” he said.

  “It ain’t my fault. I didn’t know we were gonna move, and he was the best friend I’d ever had, besides Penelope. And we both know I’ll never see her again either since she got put in a foster home last year. That’s two best friends gone in one year, and I just can’t take any crap from you about it.”

  “C’mon, let’s not argue. Before you get your feathers ruffled over something you ain’t got any control over, put your energy into what friends you can get now, and make sure you don’t lose any more,” he said as he gave me an affectionate squeeze.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to get off track. Weren’t you gonna give me the skinny on Sunday Singings?”

  He smiled at me, letting me know that we were settled in our disagreement, then, continued with his explanation.

  “Singings are what you do when you're courting an Amish girl. Usually it’s at someone’s barn and only the youth in the area are allowed—especially if you're courting someone. We sing songs and play games. It really is a lot of fun. Rebekah and I have gone to a few, but we don’t let on to any of the fellas that we’re courting one another. If we had, we’d have gotten teased something awful. For some reason or another, Amish boys like to tease you when they find out you're courting someone.”

  “Would you talk to Dad—Papa for me, Mitchell?”

  “Don’t beg.”

  “But you don’t understand. If I can just get Elijah to notice me, then maybe I’ll have a chance to go to one of them Singings with him,” I said.

  “Oh, he’s already noticed you plenty. ‘Says he likes your long blonde hair.” He flicked a wavy spiral of hair from my shoulder and I pushed at his arm.

  “Is that what he said?”

  Mitchell just stood there, staring at me like I hadn’t said a word to him.

  I stomped my feet playfully. “Tell me,” I demanded.

  “Hold on a minute. You're so giddy; the whole county is gonna mistake your jumping around for an earthquake.”

  The excitement left me as soon as he made his comment.

  “That’s not funny.”

  “Well I had to say something to get your attention. Papa said you had to be seventeen to have a beau, and unless he changes his mind, you ought to hold your horses a bit. A year could be a long wait if you're gonna be this excited about it now. If Elijah’s really interested, he’ll wait on you. And you can be sure he’ll be proper around you, so you better start thinking properly about him, or you’ll lose him to another girl,” he warned me.

  Listening to Mitchell talk this way made it hard to believe that only a few short years ago I had felt nothing short of hatred for him because of his mean disposition. I had, in fact, despised my entire family because none of them ever cared to be kind to one another, much less to help another member with a problem. Oh, occasionally, Nadine and I would put our heads together, but it usually meant trouble for the both of us. Now Mitchell was grown up and every bit of what a big brother ought to be. He no longer carried the hatred in his heart that made him ugly. In fact, he’d grown to be quite handsome with the added feature of a kinder disposition, and Rebekah was right to have chosen him.

  I walked away from Mitchell with the empty glass in my hand, forgetting that I wanted to tell him what a great teacher his Rebekah had been. The only thing on my mind was how to create an opportunity to talk to Elijah. I knew it wouldn’t be easy with his papa by his side in the field all day. I even worried that I might need to employ some of the workings of the “old Jane” in order to come up with a plan that would work.

  Unable to think of anything that wasn’t devious, I left the glass on the back porch and walked slowly toward the Zook farm feeling quite discouraged. Rachel was on the front porch with Lucy, shelling peas with an older girl I thought I recognized from school.

  “Hello, Jane. This is my cousin Hannah. She lives across the road.”

  Rachel pointed to a grey farmhouse set back off the road. It was tough to see through the trees that lined the road in front of the property. In fact, I hadn’t even realized there was a farm there until she pointed it out, as I hadn’t yet explored much of my new surroundings.

  “She’s the same age as you,” Rachel said, interrupting my thoughts.

  “That’s cool. I mean…nice to meet you, Hannah.”

  I put up a hand as if to wave, then, felt a little awkward until she mirrored my action and waved back. Without waiting for an invite, I stepped onto the porch to join the others.

  Hannah picked up a pitcher from a long table in front of a set of windows that lined the front of the house along the length of the porch. “Would you like some lemonade?”

  “Yep. That would be nice. I just gave mine away to my brother in the south field a few minutes ago, and completely forgot to get myself some more. I’m awful thirsty,” I rattled on nervously.

  Talking to people that I didn’t know had never been a talent of mine, but after the conversation I just had with Mitchell, I figured it was time for me to learn.

  “Oh no!”

  Rachel startled me with her sudden outburst.

  “I knew I would forget to take a drink to Papa and Elijah. Mam’s going to give me extra chores if I don’t get out there.”

  Rachel scampered a bit to gather the glasses full of refreshment for the two in the field.

  “I’ll help you,” I offered, secretly hoping this might be my chance to speak to the boy I admired so.

  “Well, let’s go if we’re going to do it,” Hannah said.

  Until that moment, I hadn’t counted on it being a group outing, feeling a little unsure of myself. I didn’t want an audience when I met up with Elijah in the field, but it was too late to rethink my offer of service.

  I followed nervously behind the three girls, trying not to spill the pitcher that held the remaining lemonade in it. When Elijah came into view, a lump welled up in my throat, making it difficult to breathe. Once again, I found myself trudging over clumps of dirt—only this time I had to manage a half-full pitcher of lemonade instead of a mere glass. My eyes locked onto Elijah’s, and even from that distance, I could see the deep blue of his eyes as they sparkled in the sun.

  Without warning, my foot caught in a clump of earth, sendi
ng me face down in the dirt. My ankle had twisted in the dirt, causing me to let out a high-pitched yelp just prior to landing. Lemonade seemed to spray in every direction, especially in my hair. Elijah immediately ran to my aid, but I was so embarrassed, I found it difficult to look him in the eye. I suddenly tasted blood mixed with the dirt in my mouth.

  Rachel gasped. “You’re bleeding, Miss Jane!”

  “Take her on up to the house, Elijah.” Mr. Zook spoke with authority.

  Elijah offered his arm in assistance, which was a bit awkward in the beginning. However, the shooting pain in my ankle was bigger than my pride at the moment, which forced me to accept his arm with gratitude. He seemed to be a knowledgeable and calm guide, but I supposed he’d seen worse injuries on the farm than my ankle.

  “Steady now,” he cautioned. “You don’t have to hurry. I imagine you’ll be off that ankle for a gut while.”

  His voice was as gentle as I’d imagined it to be, and his strength in holding me was exciting. I was in no hurry, I felt safe and secure with his strong arms around me. We arrived at the porch of his farmhouse, and he sat me down gently in the same worn porch swing that Rachel had sat in just minutes before. Then he reached up and smoothed back my sticky hair from my face and smiled a heartfelt smile. “Looks like you got yourself a mouthful of my God-given earth, and it’s smudged your pretty face a little, too,” he said.

  My face flushed at his boldness.

  Does he really think I’m pretty, or is he just being nice? I don’t think I care. I just like the attention.

  Ha…equal rights are for ugly girls.

  Though I knew it wasn’t right to get caught up in his good looks, I couldn’t help myself. I had to admit, though, his kindness was enough to make this moment worth the world to me, and I was prepared to milk it for all its worth.

  “You wait here, Jane, and I’ll get a wet cloth to mop up some of the blood.”

  I stared into his smiling blue eyes until he turned and walked away. All my life I had despised my name, until Elijah spoke it just then. Up until recently, my mother had spoken my name in harshness, but it sounded almost poetic coming from his lips.

  When he returned, he sat down beside me on the swing, and began to dab gently at my bleeding lip. I studied his bright blue eyes, hoping for a sign that his kind actions weren’t out of some sort of Amish tradition. My father had told us about the people’s kindness being “their way”, but I wanted to believe this was more than traditional Amish kindness. Neither of us said a word, but I felt as though there was plenty being said as we fixed our eyes on one another. I wanted to kiss him. I’d always been an impulsive person, but my bloody lip kept the desire in check. My awkwardness had left me, and a sense of belonging settled in me as we sat quietly starring at each other for what seemed like a slow-moving moment in time.

  While Hannah picked up the pieces of the broken pitcher, Rachel and Lucy scampered up onto the porch steps, breaking the silence between Elijah and me. Rachel even sat between us on the swing. I leered at her, knowing she did it on purpose. Elijah stood up abruptly and took my hand in his. His hands were rough and worn, as though they had seen many days of hard labor.

  “Is there anything else you need, Jane?”

  His manner was so gentle that I wanted to beg him to stay, but I held my tongue.

  “Papa will be missing me in the fields, I should get back,” he said, his hands still clenching mine.

  He flashed me a smile as he let my hand down gently in my lap. He advanced to the steps of the porch and turned to leave.

  I understood he had work to do, but I didn’t like it. When he turned back, I sensed his hesitation.

  “I’ll be fine,” I said, shooing him with my hand. “I just bruised my pride a little.”

  He stood there smiling at me as though he understood, then, stepped off the porch, heading back toward the field. He turned his head a final time before leaving the yard to wave, and I waved back, feeling confident that this was the beginning of a friendship that might prove to be greater than the ones I had with Bradley and Penelope.

  “I’ll stop by to see you tomorrow, if it’s okay with you?” he asked.

  I wanted to jump up with excitement, but my ankle kept me in check. So I nodded my answer with a smile, and watched him disappear beyond the pine trees that surrounded the porch. I was suddenly thankful for the reminder of the pain in my ankle, which forced me to act like a lady instead of being impulsive the way I had been most of my life. If I was to win his heart I may have to begin to mimic the girls whose company I was presently keeping.

  “Elijah likes you,” Rachel teased.

  Hannah made kissing noises against the back of her hand. “Is there anything else you need, Jane?”

  “Don’t mock me,” I insisted.

  “I can’t help it. It was just so cute the way he took your hand in his. I agree with Rachel. I believe my cousin likes you.”

  I looked at Hannah, wondering if she was still teasing me, or if she truly believed Elijah liked me. Excitement welled up in me, and I was almost glad I’d fallen.

  ****

  That night, I could scarcely sleep. I tossed and fidgeted so often that I woke Nadine.

  “What’s the matter with you? Go back to sleep and be quiet.”

  “Don’t yell at me, Nadine.”

  Nadine scowled. “If I was yelling, you’d know it,” she threatened.

  “You are so yelling, so cut it out.”

  Nadine’s scowl deepened. “Nope. And you can’t make me.”

  “I’m sorry, Nadine. Don’t be mad at me. I didn’t mean to wake you. I just can’t stop thinking about Elijah.”

  She raised a thin eyebrow and sat up in her bed to face me.

  “What about Elijah?” She was practically gritting her teeth when she spoke.

  “Oh man. I’ve never been so embarrassed in my whole life as I was today. I fell in Elijah’s field and he had to help me back to his porch. But oh my gosh, Elijah was so sweet to me. You wouldn’t believe how nice he is—and so cute too, but anyone can see that.”

  Nadine sighed and rolled her eyes, stuffing her pillow over her head.

  “I’m just so happy that you got to spend time with him, but I don’t want to hear another word, so please shut up and go back to sleep,” came a muffled and angry scolding from Nadine.

  “Well you don’t sound very happy for me. What're you getting so mad about?”

  Nadine yanked the pillow off her face and pursed her lips. “Not another word, Jane—I mean it.”

  “What's your problem, Nadine? You’re acting like you’re jealous.”

  “I am not jealous. I just want you to stop talking and go back to sleep.”

  “You’re the one that needs to stop talking. If you don’t be quiet, you’re gonna wake up everybody in the house,” I warned her.

  “I said not another word or you’ll be sorry—I mean it, Jane—this is your last warning.”

  “You need to take a chill-pill,” I said, throwing a stuffed animal at her. I laid down on my bed, determined to dream of Elijah—she certainly couldn’t stop me from doing that.

  ****

  The following morning, my ankle was very stiff and hurt more than the day before. It reminded me of a time when I was five, and had sprained my ankle because my mother had let me fall from the monkey bars at my elementary school. She had been so cruel that day by teasing me and refusing to help me down.

  As I hobbled down the stairs, I reminded myself that I’d forgiven my mother quite some time ago, so I determined that I would put it out of my mind. I smiled as I reflected on the day she came home from the clinic, but a sudden commotion toward the side of the house interrupted my thoughts.

  When I opened the door, I was surprised to see Elijah with a horse.

  “Hello, Miss Jane.”

  He tipped his hat and bowed slightly, making me feel somewhat bashful.

  “I felt so awful about what happened yesterday, that I took it upon myself t
o bring my horse, Eli, to be your personal escort to school for the next few days.”

  His tone was very polite, but also very formal. I was stunned by his offer even though I was happy at the thought of being able to have some time to get to know him better.

  “Wait a minute while I grab my sweater,” I said from over my shoulder.

  The excuse of needing a sweater would give me enough time to rid myself of the giddiness I felt. After all, I couldn’t afford any more embarrassment. My stomach growled in a quest to beg for breakfast, but I was suddenly too nervous to think about it. When I re-entered the house through the side door, Nadine was pacing the wooden floors of the front room. She stormed over to me and suddenly grabbed my arm and squeezed tightly.

  “What’s Elijah doing’ here?”

  “What’re you mad at me, for? He only brought his horse over to give me a ride to school. Leave me alone. I ain’t gonna fight with you anymore.” I pulled my arm away from her.

  “I’m going with you. Papa will say it’ll look improper for you to go alone. And since Mam is still sleeping and Papa is at work, I’ll do the deciding for you.”

  “Oh now it’s Mam and Papa, is it? What’re you gonna do? Tell Mom and Dad on me if I refuse?” I challenged her.

  “What if I do?”

  I shrugged, and looked down at the floor, feeling defeated.

  “I knew you’d see it my way,” she said. “So I guess you won’t be arguing with me anymore about going with you.”

  Her statement was final, and I knew she was probably right. It angered me, though; because I knew her reasons for going were partly out of jealousy. We walked out the side door together, and met Elijah on the dirt drive.

  “Nadine will be hanging with us,” I announced.

  “Are you all right, Jane? You seem a little upset.” Elijah tried making eye contact with me, but I didn’t want him to see the fury in my eyes.

  “I’m cool,” I muttered softly.