Katie's Way

by Marta Perry

  She went out onto the street to find that the rain had nearly stopped and the sun was trying to peek through the clouds. She glanced at the clock above the bank. She had time for one more stop, and Bishop Mose’s harness shop was just a step away.

  The bell over the door jingled, and Bishop Mose looked up with such a pleased smile that he might have been waiting all day just to see her.

  “Katie. This is nice, for sure. Are you staying dry this wet day?”

  “Ja, and I think the rain is over already.”

  “We had enough to perk the gardens up, anyway.” Bishop Mose put aside the piece of leather harness he’d been working on. “How are things going at the shop?”

  “Not bad.” She leaned against the counter. “Not great, either.”

  “Ach, it’s early days yet.” His gnarled hands, stained from the leather he worked with, lay relaxed on the counter, as if he had all the time in the world for her. “Business will pick up.”

  “I hope so.” She produced the flyers. “This is one thing I’m trying to bring more people into the shop. I’m hoping that if women join a quilting group, they will tell others.”

  He studied the flyer. “It’s a gut idea, that. Selling quilts is not like mending harness, ja?” His blue eyes twinkled. “Folks always have leather to mend, even if they aren’t ready to buy new. Buying a quilt is something folks will study on for a while, ain’t so?”

  She nodded. “That’s why it’s important to get them into the shop, even for some other reason. Then, when they’re ready to buy, I hope they come to me.”

  “I’m sure they will. What can I do to help?”

  “I thought maybe if you had any customers who might be interested, you could give them a flyer?” She ended up putting it as a question, a little surprised at herself for asking the bishop, of all people, such a thing. Maybe she shouldn’t—

  But at once he smiled and nodded. “I will. And I will put one in the window, as well. That way folks will see it when they pass. Everyone looks in here when they walk by.”

  It was easy to see why. Bishop Mose made people feel good just to look at him.

  “Denke, Bishop Mose. It is ser kind of you.”

  He shook his head. “A little thing.”

  She felt a bit bolder, thanks to his quick response. “I have been talking with Lisa Macklin, who owns the gift shop.”

  “Ja, I know Lisa. A nice woman, and a hard worker, I think, running the shop all alone since her husband passed.”

  “She has the idea that we can bring new customers to town if we all work together on it. She asked if I would help her.” She paused, not sure how to frame the question.

  “And you told her you would talk to the bishop, ja?”

  “Well, I can’t forget that I am new here. I don’t want to offend anyone, but if I don’t get more customers . . .” She let that trail off, knowing that the alternative would be obvious to him.

  “I see no problem in working with Lisa, if that is what you are asking. I’m sure you have a gut sense of what to do and what not to do.”

  “Denke. I would ask for advice if I questioned any of her plans.” It was nice to think that someone as wise as Bishop Mose had confidence in her judgment.

  “Gut. Now, tell me. How is everything going for you yourself? I know you are close with your cousins, but still, it can’t be easy settling in a new place. And taking on responsibility for a young sister, as well.”

  Was there a question in that? She wasn’t sure, but she found herself answering as if there had been.

  “Mamm and Daadi were uncomfortable at my living alone above the shop, and they thought Rhoda would be company for me.” She’d stop there, but those wise old eyes seemed to probe deeper, to see more.

  “My sister Louise is going to marry the son of the bishop back home this fall. Mamm is all excited about the wedding, and she felt that Rhoda . . . well, that having a teenager just starting to run around . . .”

  “Ach, you don’t need to say more than you want.” He reached across the counter to pat her hand. “Sometimes folks think the bishop’s kin should be perfect, and we’re none of us that.”

  She nodded, relieved that he seemed to understand what she didn’t say. “Rhoda is not wild, you know. Just young and high-spirited. And Louise and Jonas are both so serious that I sometimes wonder—” She stopped, not wanting to sound critical.

  “It takes all sorts to make a family. Or a church. Maybe the Lord puts us together with others who are different from us just so that we can learn how to forgive.”

  Her heart winced at his use of the word. But she’d heard enough of Bishop Mose’s sermons to know that humility and forgiveness were two of his favorite themes.

  “Forgiving isn’t so easy.” She thought of the pain and bitterness she’d seen in Caleb’s face, heard in his voice.

  “‘Forgive if you would be forgiven,’” he quoted from the Lord’s Prayer. “God doesn’t offer us forgiveness on any easier terms, does He?”

  Her throat tightened. “If someone has wronged you, you must forgive. I know. But folks say that you should forgive and forget, and that . . .” She stopped, not able to follow through to the conclusion.

  “Scripture tells us that God wipes the slate clean when He forgives, but we are not God. Maybe for us, it’s more important to remember and be thankful.”

  “Thankful?” The word almost choked her. “How can you be thankful when someone has hurt you? Especially someone you love?”

  His smile was very gentle. “When we’ve lived for a while, we look back at our lives. And sometimes we see that the trouble that was very hard at the time brought us gut results in the end. We can’t see the whole pattern of our lives. But God can, and He knows that today’s pain may be a step on the path He has for us, if we just trust.”

  She nodded, her throat tight. If she could be sure of that, perhaps her heart would not be so troubled. “Denke,” she whispered. “Thank you, Bishop Mose.”

  Katie hurried back to the shop, aware that she’d been longer with Bishop Mose than she’d intended—and told him more, far more, too. How much he’d guessed beyond that she didn’t know.

  Time to think—that was what she needed, and that would be difficult with Rhoda as fratched as she was today. Maybe her disposition would improve now that it wasn’t quite so gloomy out.

  Katie’s own spirits lightened when she opened the door and heard the familiar little jingle of the bell. The color and texture of everything in the shop seemed to reach out and draw her in. Did others feel that, too? She hoped so.

  The shop was empty. For an instant she thought Rhoda had left again, and then she heard a giggle as Rhoda and Becky emerged from the back room.

  “Becky, how nice. I didn’t think you were coming in today.”

  “Her onkel didn’t need her today, but her mamm had things to do in town, so she is here.” Rhoda’s bad mood was clearly a thing of the past, and Becky gave her a shy smile.

  Katie set her umbrella in the milk can. “It’s always nice to see you, Becky. And, Rhoda, you might let Becky speak for herself.”

  “She doesn’t mind,” Rhoda said. “You haven’t heard the best part.” She practically danced across the floor. “Becky’s mamm invited me to spend the night tonight. I can, can’t I, Katie? I said I was sure it would be all right.”

  “And I said we must talk with your sister.” Becky’s mother appeared in the archway. Caleb was a step behind Nancy, and Katie’s stomach seemed to lurch at the sight of him.

  “Nancy, how are you? It’s gut to see you. Is Naomi here as well?”

  “Ach, I could not get her to stir from the grossdaadi haus this morning.” A shadow crossed Nancy’s broad face. “But she joins me in saying we hope that you and Rhoda will komm to us for supper tonight.”

  Katie’s mind scrambled for an excuse. If she went, Caleb would be there, and how could she sit across from him with his still-raw pain so fresh in her mind?

  “That is ser kind of
you,” she said. “But Rhoda said ...”

  “The girls are putting things backward, ja? First is our invitation to supper. Next, we thought your Rhoda might stay the night. If she can stand all the noise and commotion from Becky’s brothers, that is.” Nancy chuckled at her own joke.

  They were all looking at Katie expectantly, and she had to answer. “Rhoda will love to spend the time with Becky, for sure. But it is too much trouble to have to bring me back as well.”

  Besides, she had a pretty good idea who would be asked to take her home.

  “It makes no trouble.” Caleb’s voice might be a little deeper than usual, but no one else seemed to notice. “You and Rhoda will go home with me, and I will bring you back after supper. I know my mamm looks forward to showing you her quilt pattern.”

  A message seemed to pass between them without the need for words. She could be a means of bringing Naomi out of her shell. She nodded, managing a smile. “Denke. We will like that.”

  The two girls hugged each other. It was such a small thing to make them happy. She should be ashamed of herself for hesitating, but there was more involved here than anyone else could guess.

  The afternoon seemed to go slowly, and that was both positive and negative. It put off the moment at which she’d get into the buggy with Caleb, but it gave her too much time to ponder her feelings. She began cutting the pieces for a Lancaster Rose quilt, thinking she’d make it during the quiet times in the shop, and since it was a pattern she’d never made before, it should keep her mind occupied.

  Bishop Mose’s words kept echoing in her thoughts. Forgiveness was such a given in their lives that she had never questioned it in relation to Eli and Jessica. She’d forgiven them for hiding their feelings from her. She’d wished them happiness. She just didn’t want to stay around and witness that happiness. Surely that wasn’t wrong.

  Her fingers moved among the pieces she’d chosen for the quilt, trying one combination and then another. She had forgiven. That was all God expected of her, wasn’t it? But Bishop Mose’s words seemed to say that as long as she dwelt on it, it wasn’t forgiven.

  By the time they climbed into Caleb’s buggy in late afternoon, Katie’s mind had spun itself into numbness. She wouldn’t think about it anymore. She wouldn’t.

  The two girls scrambled into the back, of course, leaving the seat next to Caleb for Katie. She climbed up quickly, not giving him a chance to offer to help her. Things were difficult enough between them without the risk of feeling . . . what? She didn’t want to put a name to that shimmer of sensation each time they touched.

  The silence in the front of the buggy contrasted with the rapid chatter behind them. It had reached the stage of awkwardness when Caleb finally cleared his throat and jerked a nod toward the backseat.

  “I just have brothers, and Becky is the only girl. Are girls always like that?”

  Katie smiled, glad enough to talk about something so neutral. “Ja, pretty much. With five girls in our family, when we were younger Daadi always said it was only quiet when we were all asleep.”

  Caleb glanced at her as if measuring what she’d been like when she was younger. “You don’t seem like a chatterbox to me.”

  “Ach, that’s because you haven’t seen me with folks I’ve known all my life. I’ve been on my best behavior here.”

  One eyebrow lifted, and there was actually a hint of humor in his face. “This has been your best?”

  “Ja, it has.” So they could joke with each other. That was gut, wasn’t it?

  The two girls collapsed on the seat in a spasm of laughter. Caleb’s firm lips curved. “It’s nice to hear Becky having so much fun.”

  “Ja,” Katie said softly. “Rhoda, too. She needed a friend in Pleasant Valley.”

  With Caleb’s strong hands relaxed on the reins, the horse seemed to find its way home without guidance. They were headed west, and the sunset painted the clouds along the hillside in shades of orange and yellow, fading off to a soft pink at the edges.

  “It’s hard to imagine you and your sister behaving like those two,” he said.

  “Louise, you mean? Well, I have to admit that Louise is seldom silly. Sometimes I think she was born serious.”

  The corner of his mouth twitched. “But not you?”

  “No, not me.”

  He was actually teasing her as if they were friends. Maybe clearing the air between them had been a gut thing.

  “Who did you giggle with, then?”

  She’d walked right into that question, and she had to answer. “Jessica Stoltzfus. She lived next door, and she was just my age.” Her voice didn’t give anything away, did it?

  “You and Jessica are still close?” He put the question casually, but she sensed that he had heard what she didn’t say.

  “No. I mean, well, she married. And I moved here, and . . .” Her voice petered out, because he was looking at her. And he was hearing the emotion that lay under the words.

  She sucked in a breath. She didn’t have to tell him. She didn’t have to tell anyone. But . . .

  “Eli Hershberger and I planned to marry. But he married Jessica instead.” There must be something light she could say, something to show that it was over, that she didn’t care anymore.

  But there wasn’t. She’d shown him that she knew too much about his past, and now he knew too much about hers. If she tried to pass it off with a lie now . . .

  Somehow she didn’t think he would believe it.

  “I thought there was something.” His voice was a low rumble. His hand moved from the reins to touch hers where it clasped the seat between them. “I’m sorry.”

  For the second time that day she was brought to the verge of tears by someone’s unexpected understanding. It was painful, having her secret exposed. But it also seemed to form a bond between them, and that . . . that felt good.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  Caleb drew up at the rear of the store a few mornings later. Blackie, accustomed to the routine, stopped in his usual place and then whickered, his ears coming forward. An answering whicker came from the small stable.

  So. Apparently Katie had done as she’d said—she’d found a horse for herself. Caleb slid down and began unharnessing Blackie. Katie was an independent woman, for sure. She hadn’t even mentioned the new occupant of the stable to him.

  Well, the stable belonged to Bishop Mose. Maybe she figured that it was not Caleb’s business. Still, he felt that they were growing to be more like friends since the evening he’d taken her to Andy and Nancy’s house for supper. She might have mentioned it.

  The stable door opened. Katie stepped out into the yard, the sunlight picking up glints of gold in her brown hair. “Caleb, komm and see what my cousin Aaron surprised me with.”

  “I can hear it already.” It had been a surprise, then. Somehow that eased the prickle of irritation he’d felt.

  “Her. Aaron found the sweetest little mare when he was on a job over toward Fisherdale. He took her on a trial basis, just to see if she suits me.”

  Caleb followed her into the stable. “From the way you sound, the answer must be yes, ain’t so?”

  “I sound like a new mammi, I’m afraid.” Katie reached up to pet the neck of the bay mare, and the mare rubbed against her sleeve. “Her name is Daisy.”

  “She doesn’t look much like a daisy.” He patted the animal’s shoulder, running his palm along her back. She seemed like a nice, sturdy animal. Aaron had a good eye for horseflesh, he knew. “But if she makes you smile, that’s probably as gut a name as any.”

  “It was already her name, so it’s not as if I had a choice. But I think it suits her.”

  “Like I said,” he responded. “It makes you smile. Isn’t that what you do when you spot the first daisies along the road? So, how does she drive?”

  “I haven’t had time to take her out yet. It was after supper when Aaron turned up with her, and I wouldn’t try her for the first time at dusk.” She pulled her gaze away from the animal to look at
him. “You don’t mind that I’m using part of the stable?”

  “How could I mind? You look like a little girl who’s gotten a wonderful-gut gift for her birthday.”

  Katie’s smile lit her eyes. “That’s how I feel, I think. I can’t wait to take her out.”

  Maybe it wasn’t so smart to stand here watching that smile. Caleb moved back to Blackie and started taking the harness off. “Why don’t you go for a drive?” he said. “Can’t Rhoda watch the shop for a bit?”

  “She can, but not today. I have the quilting group coming for the first time.”

  “I’d nearly forgotten.” He coiled up the lines and hung the harness from its peg. “Mamm said to tell you she’ll be here for sure.”

  “Gut. I’m excited. And a little nervous, too, to be honest.”

  “I don’t see why.” And here he was, looking into Katie’s eyes again. “They are just people who share your love for quilting.”

  “Ja. I’m being foolish, maybe, but I want so much to have this work well.”

  He thought it might be the first time she’d shown that she questioned herself, and he wanted to wipe the apprehension from her face. His hand moved, as if to touch her, and he pressed it flat against his leg.

  “It will turn out for the best.” He stepped back outside. “You know, maybe we should keep the two horses separated for a bit, so that they don’t get into a fight over who’s the boss.”

  Katie moved away quickly, as if maybe she’d been expecting . . . something, he wasn’t sure what.

  “Ja, that’s fine. I can leave Daisy in the stall for now, if you want to turn Blackie out into the yard.”

  “Right, sure.” He grasped Blackie’s halter and led him through the gate into the small fenced paddock that took up most of the backyard. “We can switch them at lunchtime, if you want.”

  “Ja. Sounds gut.” Katie spoke naturally, and whatever moment of strain he’d imagined was gone.

  Imagined, that was the word. He and Katie were easy with each other now, maybe because they each knew the other’s pain.