Best Served Cold

by Kandle, Tawdra

  “And modest, too.” Jesse grinned, and there they were. The dimples had come out to play again. I was struck by the sudden and almost irresistible urge to cover them with my mouth and trace them with my tongue...

  “Hey, you okay? You checked out there for a minute.” He was looking at me with narrowed eyes. I hoped my mouth was closed.

  “Sorry. Yeah, modest. Well, I don’t have many obvious talents, so what I know I can do, I like to celebrate.”

  “I don’t know. You’re good with kids, clearly, ‘cause Des loves you. He talks about you all the time. And you’re a journalism major, right? So I bet you’re a good writer. Plus, you’re really pretty, and if you can cook, too? Those are some fairly major talents.”

  “Wait, wait, wait.” I held up one hand. “Did you just call me pretty?”

  Jesse’s eyes widened, and he got a deer-in-the-headlights look. “Yeah, I guess that’s not really a talent. Wow, my sister would be calling me a sexist pig if she were here. Sorry.”

  “No, that’s not what I meant. You think I’m pretty?”

  He smiled again. “Well, yeah. Why are you acting like that’s big news?”

  I lifted one shoulder. “A girl doesn’t hear that often enough. At least I don’t. So thanks.”

  “I find that hard to believe. I saw the way guys were looking at you Friday night. And that Jack you left with, he must tell you. Or if he doesn’t, he should.”

  I’d been waiting for Jack’s name to crop up. “Jack’s just a friend. I don’t even know him that well.” Telling the truth about that much was a relief.

  “I think he wants to be more. He was kind of intense.”

  I couldn’t help laughing. “Well, umm...it’s a secret, but Jack is taking drama classes, and he was practicing Friday night. He doesn’t care about me.”

  “I’d say those classes are paying off. When you left, I would have sworn you were at least close friends.”

  So he’d noticed, and enough that he’d thought about me. The idea gave me a warm glow.

  “Did you have fun Friday night?” A slight change in subject was in order.

  Jesse picked up his plate and carried it to the sink. “I didn’t stick around very long after I talked with you. Like I said, parties aren’t my thing and it was a long week. I came back here and watched Firefly.”

  “Really?” I followed him to the sink and waited for him to finish with the water. “I wanted to stay home and watch Buffy instead of being at the party. So I’m kind of jealous.”

  “Buffy...yeah, now that was television.” Jesse slid his plate into the dishwasher rack and held out his hand. “Give me your plate.”

  “What? Oh, no, that’s okay, I’ll clean it.”

  “Nope, you cooked, I clean. Gimme.”

  I acquiesced and leaned against the counter. “That’s a very evolved attitude.”

  “That’s me, evolved. I grew up around a lot of women. I know my place.” He ran the water again and scrubbed at the leftover cheese. “So you’re a Joss fan?”

  “Are you kidding? Joss Whedon is a freaking genius. I’d watch anything he wrote or produced.”

  “Yeah, me too. I just got Dollhouse on DVD.”

  “Another one of my favorites.” I watched Jesse’s muscles roll beneath his snug t-shirt as he reached down to the dishwasher again and then turned to dry his hands. He didn’t mention playing sports, but he was definitely built.

  He caught me staring, and one side of his mouth lifted, followed by one dimple. I swallowed hard.

  “So did you see Much Ado About Nothing?”

  I cocked my head. “The play? Yeah, I’ve seen it a few times. I’m kind of a Shakespeare nerd.”

  “No, I meant Joss’s film of it. Don’t tell me you haven’t heard of it.”

  “Joss did Shakespeare? I’m a loser. I didn’t know. Guess I’ll have to see it on DVD.”

  Jesse hooked his thumbs in the belt loops of his jeans. “It came out last summer, but it’s still playing at the dollar theater in town. You really should see it on the big screen.” His eyes were holding mine, steady but tentative.

  I nodded. “I guess I really should.”

  He licked his lips. “Would you want to go see it? This weekend, Friday, maybe?”

  A tingle danced down my spine. “With you?” I knew it sounded dumb, but I wanted to be sure what he was asking.

  “Well, yeah, with me. I mean, if you want.”

  I bit the side of my lip. “I would love to. But I’m not sure it’s a good idea.”

  He frowned. “Why not?”

  I ticked off the reasons on my fingers. “First, I work for your dad. I don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable. And second...” I looked down at the floor. “My life is kind of complicated right now. I just got out of a relationship. It was messy. And ugly. I don’t want to drag you into the drama.”

  Jesse didn’t answer me right away. He seemed to be staring at the same spot on the floor that held my attention.

  “But you’re not seeing anyone now? The messy relationship is over?”

  “Oh, yeah. Way over. But the guy was high-profile on campus, and...” I shrugged. “People talk.”

  “Okay. But no one here knows me. We’ll stay off campus, if you’re worried about people seeing you with me.”

  “It’s not you. I don’t care about that. But maybe you don’t want to be seen with me.”

  One side of his mouth lifted in a half-smile. “Let me worry about that. And I’m not.”

  I took a deep breath. “All right. Let me think about it. I’m not saying no.”

  “But you’re not saying yes, either?”

  “Not yet. But ...” I smiled. “I really do love Joss, and Shakespeare, too, so chances are pretty good I’ll change my mind.”

  He nodded. “Where’s your phone?”

  I reached into the back pocket of my jeans. “Right here. Why?”

  “Give it to me.” He took it from my hand and hit a few buttons. “There. Now my number is programmed in, so when you do change your mind, you can text me.” He hit another button, and I heard a buzzing. “And now I just called myself from your phone, so I have your number, too. So I can text you and remind you to change your mind.” He handed me back my phone.

  “Thanks.”

  “I better get to work on that paper. Thanks for the mac and cheese.” He put his hand on the door knob but hesitated before turning it. “I hope I’ll see you Friday night.. And for the record...” He turned and flashed the duet of dimples.

  “You really are very pretty.”

  I think I floated home from work that night. I grinned stupidly every time I thought of Jesse, especially when I remembered that he told me I was pretty.

  I didn’t have an inferiority complex. I knew I wasn’t a complete troll, but I also was well aware that I didn’t measure up to what guys considered hot. Dating Liam had been a big ego boost, sure, but he hadn’t been the most reassuring boyfriend ever, either. The only time he really gave me compliments or praise was when we were in bed, and in my mind, that didn’t count.

  But Jesse was different. The conversation we’d had that afternoon was more in-depth and real than any talk I’d ever had with Liam. I liked the way his mind worked, and he seemed to be interested in many of the same things I was. While I wasn’t ready to jump into anything again—I was still wary of all things guy—Jesse intrigued me.

  “Well, you look more alive than you did this morning. You must have gotten a good nap at Dr. Fleming’s house.” Ava smiled at me as I danced into our room.

  “Nope, no nap. But I did hang out with Jesse Fleming, and guess what I just might have?”

  Ava’s brows drew together. “I’m thinking something in the pharmaceuticals area, the way you’re grinning.”

  “Not even close. I might have a date. For Friday night. With Jesse Fleming.”

  “A date?” Ava left the desk and sat down on her bed. “How did that happen?”

  “I’m not really sure. He came
home while Des was sleeping, and we ate mac and cheese and talked, and then he asked me to the movies with him on Friday.”

  “Jules, that’s awesome.” She jumped up and gave me a brief, tight hug. “I know you need this. And like I said, he’s cute.”

  “He is. But he’s, like, a decent person, too. He’s someone I could be friends with even if he wasn’t sexy and didn’t have those adorable dimples.” I paused. “He’s the kind of guy I kept wishing Liam was the whole time we were dating.”

  “Oh, sweetie.” Ava patted my arm. “I know. But why do you keep saying you might have a date? He asked, you said yes, so...?”

  “I didn’t say yes yet. I’m not sure if I should. Between Giff’s plans and mine, maybe bringing someone else into the mix is a bad idea.”

  “Jules, this whole idea was about you moving on. This could be a sign that you can. That you should.”

  “I know. But I’m not ready to let this go. Maybe I should be, but it still comes down to the same thing in my mind. I want Liam to understand what he did to me. Dating someone else doesn’t negate that.”

  Ava nodded. “I understand. Well, if you do go out with Jess and Giff finds out, you can always just say you found someone else to help make Liam jealous.”

  “True.” I sat down at the desk and opened my laptop. “Wow. Look at this. Since Anne posted that ad for us about the blog, we’ve gotten a ton of submissions. And comments.”

  “And I saw the Facebook page that you and Kristen put up is getting some interest. A few people posted on there, too.”

  “I see that. So far, all we’re getting is the classic boy-done-girl wrong tales.”

  “What were you expecting? Isn’t that what you wanted?” Ava rolled her shoulders, stretching.

  “Yeah, I guess so. Maybe I wanted to hear a little more. I want to know why the guys do this. What makes a boy think it’s okay to treat a girl so badly?”

  Ava laughed. “That’s a question women have been trying to answer for centuries. Good luck, sister.”

  I sighed, getting down to work on the blog. “Thanks.”

  Over the rest of the week, in between putting together the stories for the project and keeping up with the rest of my schoolwork, I fielded texts from Jesse. He started fairly low-key with a simple ‘hello’ here and there, checking in, asking what I was doing. But he usually worked in a reminder about the movies on Friday night.

  Are you still thinking?

  I do it all the time.

  Smartass. About the movie. Friday. Me.

  I smiled. I hadn’t been able to stop thinking about it—about him.

  Oh, that?

  Yeah, that. Are we on?

  Hmmm

  That’s not a no.

  It’s a hmmm.

  C’mon. It’s just a movie.

  I was ready to give in, ready to type those three letters he wanted to see—YES. My fingers were poised over the keys.

  “Jules.”

  Ava stood in our open door, just back from class. It was a rare mild day, and she was carrying her coat instead of wearing it.

  “Sorry, didn’t want to startle you. Looked like you were preoccupied there.” She pointed to my phone. “God, it was nice out today. Spring is in the air.” She dumped her backpack on the desk. “And you have dinner plans.”

  “I do? No, I don’t.” I glanced up from my phone again. I still hadn’t answered Jesse’s last text.

  “I ran into Giff on the way over here and agreed to deliver a message. Be at the dining hall at six. I’ll go with you. He told me which table we need to sit at, and then your dates will arrive. He said to tell you to be flirty and friendly, but not over the top.”

  “Oh, God.” I rolled my eyes and groaned. “Seriously?”

  “Yeah. Liam is supposed to be there around the same time. I’m allowed to sit with you, but I can’t appear to be with any of the guys.”

  “Of course not. Did he tell you how I’m supposed to dress? What is it this time, sweats?”

  “No, he said just wear whatever you want, but nothing special. Don’t look like you’re trying to catch Liam’s attention.”

  “Because Liam always paid so much attention to how I dressed,” I muttered.

  “Jules, either commit to this, or don’t. The whole plan was your idea. Like I told you before, if you’re uncomfortable, shut it down. But don’t act like Giff is forcing you into anything. He isn’t. He’s trying to be helpful.”

  “I know. I’m being a bitch. He’s a good friend, and you’re wonderful, and I’m a pain in the ass. I’m sorry. I think...I’m scared. I’m afraid you and Giff are going to all this trouble, and Liam isn’t going to care. What if he doesn’t, Ave? What if he’s just glad that he doesn’t have to deal with me anymore? And what’s wrong with me, that I care?”

  Ava, being Ava, didn’t rush to tell me I was wrong. She frowned, started to say something, and then stopped.

  “You think that’s true, don’t you?” I closed my eyes. “I’m doing all of this crazy shit to get him back just to dump him, and it won’t mean anything to Liam. I’m an idiot.”

  “No, that’s not exactly what I was going to say.” Ava looked over my shoulder, as though trying to focus on something just beyond my face. “I think...I think maybe it will work out. At least, it will work as far as Liam might think he wants you again, and you’ll get the chance to toss it back in his face.”

  “And...?” I knew there was more by her expression.

  “And maybe he’ll learn something about how to treat girls. Or maybe...he’ll find out that he’s relieved that you don’t really want him, either.”

  I sucked in a breath and leaned back against the wall. “Okay. Ouch, I think.”

  “I knew that was going to come across wrong. No, listen to me. What have you been saying all along, since Liam broke up with you? That you didn’t really want to date him in the first place, right? Sweetie, we know you were never really in love with him. You liked dating him. Being Liam Bailey’s girlfriend, when no one else had been able to hold him for more than a few weeks. And whether you want to admit it or not, you liked the sex.”

  My face burned, but I didn’t deny it, the memory of my dream earlier in the week still fresh in my head.

  “So maybe...it could have been the same with him. He liked you, definitely loved the sex--what guy wouldn’t—liked that his parents approved of you. But you know, the whole time you two were together, I got the sense that he wasn’t quite...committed. He was always holding back. Remember the other day, when you were talking about Jesse, you said he was the guy you wished Liam had been?” She bit her thumb, still not meeting my eyes. “To be honest, I wasn’t surprised that he broke up with you. I hated how he did it, yes, and I think he’s a jerk, but I also think he did the right thing. He just did it in a dick way.”

  I closed my eyes, thinking about Ava’s words. She wasn’t wrong, and if I were being straight with myself, I’d admit I had thought the same thing. Or at least along the same lines.

  “So why are you going along with me, helping me do this?”

  Ava smiled. “Because I do love you, and I believe you need this on some level. And maybe because I think in the long run, it’ll be good for Liam, too, though he might not agree right away.”

  I bit the side of my lip. “All right, then. To the dining hall?”

  “Absolutely. Just let me pull my hair back.” She vanished into the bathroom.

  Jesse probably thought I was blowing him off. I opened his last message again.

  Sorry about that. My roommate just came in. Have to go now, promise I will answer you tonight.

  I opened my closet and found my favorite hoodie, a pale green fleece with the name of my high school embroidered on the front. The color set off my skin tone and hair and brought out my eyes. Or at least that was what my mother told me. I just loved it because it was warm and unbelievably comfortable.

  Ava and I didn’t often eat at the dining hall. Our eating plan was part of Ava�
��s RA deal, but we could use our meal credits at the student union food court as well as the main hall. And since the food court allowed us to get take out, we usually opted for that choice.

  The sun set as we made our way across campus to the brick building. The relative warmth of the day was giving way to the evening chill, and I hugged my arms tighter around my middle, glad I had put on gloves.

  We went through the check-in line and picked up trays. Ava sighed in defeat. “What makes them think that someone is going to want tacos every night of the week? The smell makes me want to puke.”

  “I don’t think they expect the same person to eat a taco every night. More like, someone on campus is going to crave Mexican. But I agree. Salad bar?”

  “Definitely.”

  We loaded our plates with vegetables and cheese, dug bottles of water from the cooler, and then I followed Ava to a round table in the middle of the room, right along the main walkway.

  “Are you sure this is the one Giff meant?” I glanced around. My choice would have been tucked back in one of the dark corners.

  “Positive. Sit down.” Ava dropped her tray onto the table and pulled out a chair. I followed suit.

  “How long do you think we’ll have to...” My voice trailed off as three men in sweats and t-shirts approached the table, identical expressions of determination on their faces.

  “Hey.” Their trays clanked on the table, nearly in unison. I was surrounded by almost-overwhelming testosterone.

  They were all big guys with the thick necks I’d come to associate with football players. Their hair was buzzed short, and their t-shirts revealed muscle-knotted arms. I swallowed hard, my throat suddenly very dry.

  “You’re Julia, right?” The one sitting closest to me leaned over and spoke low. “Giff said long brown hair, sitting with a short Italian girl with black hair.” He looked at Ava.

  “Nice to know how my friends describe me.” She rolled her eyes.

  “Yes, I’m Julia.” I smiled, conscious that Liam could be in the dining hall watching us even now. “But Giff didn’t tell me your names.”

  “I’m Phil, that’s Kent and this is Marcus.” Phil’s eyes ran up and down me, taking in the hoodie and jeans. “You’re pretty cute.”