She tried to do as he instructed, effort and fear etched on her face. Mascara ran down her cheeks, and her tears soaked her pretty white blouse. Her gasps became hiccups, her hiccups grunts. When her eyes lifted to his, the brilliant blue seemed dimmer and more exhausted than he’d ever noticed. “I can’t do this anymore,” was all she said.
“Shi, don’t you give up on me. Damn it, don’t you give up on us.”
“Me?” she sobbed. “How can you leave me again?”
“I’m not leaving you, baby. I’m getting us back. This is the first step.”
“I can’t even get a job here because I don’t know where we’re living or where we’re going to end up. Mrs. Lyons wants to hire me at the bank, but she can’t because I couldn’t tell her for sure if we’re staying.”
“We’re staying right here. Skip said the job’s mine once I’ve done the training.”
“Kevin—” she swiped a hand under her nose—“I’ve waited my whole life for you. I waited for you to notice me, I waited for you to finally ask me out, and I waited while you got your degree and your commercial license. I thought we settled in Denver because that’s where you wanted to be.”
“Where we both wanted to be,” he reminded her.
“I wanted to be wherever you were. I wouldn’t live in Denver if it wasn’t for you.”
“I thought—”
“You thought. You didn’t ask. I’d follow you to the moon if you asked me to. You haven’t asked, not in a long time.”
He sat back on his heels. She was right. He’d cruised along, certain she’d follow no matter what. “You’re right. I didn’t ask. So I’ll ask you now. Where do you want to end up?”
She took a deep breath. He held his as she took her time answering. When she ran her fingers through his hair, he thought, Oh Lord, she’s about to break my heart. “I want to end up with you. I don’t care what I do or where we live. It’s my downfall, I suppose, loving you too much and not wanting anything else.”
He let his breath out in a rush, grateful and awed by her love. He’d taken it and her for granted for way too long.
“But if I had to choose,” she continued, “I want to live here. I miss my mama and daddy and my friends. I’m sure we’d make friends in Denver, but you were gone all the time. At least here if you were gone, I’d have my family.”
“I wouldn’t be gone, not here. I’d be home all the time.”
“What about the winter? You can only crop dust half the year.”
“I talked to Dodge. He needs help, and he’s wanting to slow down a bit. I’ve been working with him, and I thought I’d hate it, but I don’t.”
“Are you kidding?”
“No. Trust me, no one’s more surprised than I am. I hated working for him when I was a kid, but now it feels honest. It feels right. We can build something here. Something real. Give me a chance to give that to you.”
Her eyes welled with tears again. “I can’t stand another day apart, much less four weeks.”
“The training won’t start until January.”
“And then what? Where will we live? I don’t want to be apart anymore.”
“I don’t either. Let me talk to Lyle. I don’t know why he can’t stay at Erica’s and let us have the cabin.”
“Ah…maybe because he worked all summer making this place livable for himself.”
“You saw them together. Do you really think he wants to stay with me when he can be with Erica?” He tucked her hair behind her ear. “He won’t be home tonight. I guarantee it.”
“You think he won’t?”
“Not a chance. Stay with me tonight. I miss you.”
“What about tomorrow? And the night after that?”
“I’ll talk to Lyle. If he says no, then I’ll either move in with your parents until we sell the house or I can ask my mom if we can stay with her and Dodge. Lyle lived there for a long time before they kicked him out. Surely they’d let us stay for a few weeks.”
“We need to get our stuff from the house.”
“We will. We can make a plan to go up, bring some stuff down.” He kissed one cheek and then the other. “We’ll figure this out, Shi. It’s just a bump in a very long road.”
Her hands rested on his shoulders, her scent enveloping him, intoxicating him the way it always had. “So I can tell Mrs. Lyons we’re home for good?”
“Definitely home for good.” He moved his lips to her neck while his hands unbuttoned her blouse. It had been so long, too damn long since he’d had his hands on her.
“Kev?” she asked, her voice already a throaty whisper.
“Hum?” His lips moved south, following every button.
“How much does the training cost?”
He paused. Damn. He’d forgotten to mention that little detail. “Let me worry about that.” He concentrated on the task at hand—getting her out of her clothes and under him as quickly as possible.
She had other ideas. “No.” She pushed him back. “No. Don’t tell me not to worry my pretty little head about this. If we’re starting over, we both have to change.”
She was right, of course, but he wasn’t sure how much longer he could wait to be inside her. “You’re right, you’re right. It’s…expensive.”
“How expensive?”
He dropped his head in her lap. He should have known she’d derail him. “Do we have to talk about this now?”
“Kevin…”
“All right, all right.” He sat up, looked into her weary eyes, and braced for the scream. “It’s ten thousand dollars.”
Chapter 34
Dodge walked into the Hailey diner for lunch and sat down at the only available booth along the wall. He spotted the group at the table next to him. They piqued his curiosity, be he didn’t have any interest in joining. He pulled the plastic menu from the holder and perused its contents even though he knew it by heart.
Sarah was late, of course, but he expected that. She’d get caught up in her stories and wouldn’t look at the time until she came up for air. If he were a smart man, he’d have gone home for lunch instead of meeting her at the diner. It was their habit to have lunch together at least once a week, and the diner had been their usual place. Since Lyle moved out, Dodge needed to be more creative and go home for lunch. Lunch at home included dessert—his favorite variety.
As he shoved the menu into the holder, she walked in, smiling at everyone and waving to a few. She eased into the booth across from him and leaned across to give him a kiss. “Sorry I’m late.”
“Figured you would be.”
“I got caught up in a scene that’s been giving me fits. I think I worked it out.”
“You always do.”
She narrowed her eyes at him. “You’re awfully agreeable today. What gives?”
“Nothing. I was just thinking we need to shake things up a bit.”
“Oh? I like the way that sounds.”
“How about next week I come home for lunch?” He waggled his brows. “Like the good old days.”
“I see.” She sat back, and her lips formed a sexy smirk. “You want lunch after dessert.”
“Or before. I’m not picky.”
“No,” she said. “You never have been about that.” After the waitress took their order, Sarah’s eyes kept zoning in on the table over his shoulder. “Some place you’d rather be?” he asked.
“Huh?” She looked back at Dodge. “That’s a curious group, don’t you think?”
“Bunch of know-it-alls.”
She screwed her face into a comical frown. “You know what I mean. It’s an STS meeting.”
“So?”
“So, why weren’t you invited? And, more importantly, where’s Tommy?”
He sighed. Her quick mind was always two steps ahead. “I told you the younger Garrity’s been asking questions about the meeting we had with Holcomb’s lady.”
“He’s still poking around?” She tsked and shook her head. “Tommy needs to shut him down.”
/> “Patrick’s like a dog in heat. It’d be easier to stop Miguel’s dog on the scent than to keep Garrity’s big nose out of other people’s business. Besides, Tommy’s got his reasons.”
“I know you think I’m being romantic, but I’m kind of glad this woman from his past has made an appearance. He’s too young to be so closed off and fanatic about work.”
“Now you sound like Garrity, poking your nose where it doesn’t belong. Tommy doesn’t need anyone else butting into his business.”
“That’s not stopping them.” She nodded to father and son Garrity and their posse of yes men.
“Not your business, sweetheart.”
“I know, I know. How has Kevin seemed to you?” she asked.
Dodge shrugged. “Fine. He took off early today to go talk to Skip about the crop dusting job.”
“Really? Do you think they’re going to stay in the valley?”
“Sounds like it, although I’m not sure where.” His antenna went up when she stared at him and bit her lip. “No. I know what you’re thinking, and the answer’s no. We just got rid of Lyle.”
“Come on, honey. It wouldn’t be forever. We let Lyle stay for over a year. How can we say no when Kevin’s in a bind?”
“It’s not just Kevin. Do you really want them to move in with us with no set date for them to move out? What if their house never sells?”
“I wouldn’t mind. Besides, they don’t want to stay permanently any more than we want them to stay. I won’t refuse our home to them if they ask.”
“What about our lunch dates?”
She reached under the table and patted his leg. “Rain check?”
The waitress delivered their food. Between bites, Dodge pouted and Sarah kept her ears peeled to the table behind them.
“Did you hear that?” she whispered. “They’re talking about Tommy, wanting to replace him as head of STS because he won’t use the dirt Little G dug up on the lady from Holcomb.”
“Sarah…” he warned.
“Aren’t you going to do something? You can’t let them turn on Tommy. Besides, the only reason STS has any credibility is because he’s involved. If they squeeze him out, half the valley will go too.”
Damn it, she was right, but that didn’t mean he liked the idea. He dropped his fork, wiped his mouth, and scooted out of the booth, narrowing his eyes at her as he went. Within two steps, he was at the table. “Gentlemen.”
“Dodge.” The men nodded, and Garrity closed a file on the table between his plate and his father’s. “How’s business?”
“Good,” he said. “You boys working on STS without your leader?”
“Tommy’s got his agenda,” Patrick said. “We’ve got ours.”
“Yours includes digging up dirt on an innocent woman and slandering her reputation. Is that how we’re doing things now?”
Patrick leaned back and tucked his thumbs into his front pockets. It was a wonder he could find the pockets considering the size of his belly. “We won’t know if she’s innocent unless we dig.”
“Guilty until proven innocent?” Dodge shook his head at the elder Mitchell. “Thought you were a lawyer, not judge and jury all wrapped into one.”
“This isn’t a matter of law. It’s a matter of livelihood. Since when are you afraid to get your hands dirty?”
Dodge lifted his hands and flipped them over, inspecting them for dirt. “Mine are clean. I plan to keep them that way. So does Tommy. If the man who’s gotten us this far doesn’t want to inflict personal harm on a woman, I stand with him. No matter which way this thing falls, I want to be able to look my wife in the eye and myself in the mirror when it’s over.”
“We want to be able to look at our town, our valley and know we did whatever it took to save it.”
“Won’t be much worth saving if we lose our values in the process.”
“We disagree,” Mitchell said.
“I guess some things don’t change.” Dodge started to turn but stopped. “Tommy’s a good man. He’s done more to help our cause than all of us combined. If he’s not willing to harm a woman’s reputation, I’d say those are more points in his favor.”
“Price of your land will go up if this thing goes through,” Patrick said to Dodge’s back. “How do we know you’re not playing both sides? You and Tommy both.”
“Price of everything will go up. This game you’re playing, it has a price too, one you might not be able to pay.”
Sarah cinched her lips tight when he sat back down but patted his hand.
“I’m done dealing with those fools,” he said.
“You dealt with them good. You did the right thing. I’m proud of you.”
“I enjoy calling out stupid, but Tommy will be the one to suffer.”
“Are you going to tell him what they’re up to?”
“He knows,” Dodge said. “Trust me, he knows.”
Chapter 35
Gretchen found a blanket in the bedroom closet and brought it to the den. Tommy was busy stacking wood in the fireplace. They hadn’t spoken since she’d washed her face. He must be mad about being stuck in the cabin with her for God only knew how long. She knew how she felt being alone with him. She could only sit on the couch and wonder what went through his mind.
Gretchen found herself watching the muscles of his back and arms bunch under his shirt as he placed wood in the fireplace. His hips appeared narrow in contrast to his powerful muscles flexing beneath his jeans. Desire, so long buried, felt foreign inside her body. It sprang to life along with the fire that began to smoke under Tommy’s care.
He clapped dirt from his hands and stood, eyeing her before walking to the hallway. She heard water running and assumed he was washing the grime from his face and hands. She wrapped herself in the throw from the back of the leather chair and left the larger blanket for Tommy.
He stood in the doorway and stared, studying her face. “The fire will heat this place up shortly. You should move closer, but be careful. The wood’s dry. It may pop out at you.”
She did as he suggested and moved to the floor in front of the fireplace, taking the throw with her. He waited until she was settled and walked to the kitchen, opening cabinets and drawers. “He’s got canned soup and chili, enough for a couple days. It’s not fancy, but it’ll get us through.”
“Whose cabin is this?” she asked.
“A friend.”
He wasn’t offering any specifics. It shouldn’t have hurt, but it did. She’d admitted her most painful secret, laid everything out for him to judge, and he couldn’t even spare the details of whose cabin they were staying in?
He opened several cans, dumped the contents into a pan, and carried the pan and a wooden spoon to the fireplace with a long oven mitt on his hand. He held it over the flame while she stewed and fretted. She felt helpless, exhausted, and useless.
“His name’s Bosco. I’m not sure what his real name is. He used to work at Bear Stream. He keeps this place for weekends when he comes into town to ski. He’s rented skis from me for going on six years now.”
“Oh.”
He switched arms on the pan.
“I can help with that when your arms get tired.”
He looked at her. “You stay put and keep warm. Your color’s getting better. You were gray for a while.”
Great. He looked more handsome, more masculine than ever, and she was gray. Fantastic.
“I’m wondering how you survive a Chicago winter?” he asked.
“We stay inside.”
He pursed his lips. “Good strategy.” He stirred the soup and switched hands, studying the fire as his expression hardened. “So what happened after the baby was born?”
Gretchen took a fortifying breath. She thought they’d put that away. Apparently not. “We divorced within a month. Ryan’s parents had the papers drawn up before Alex was born. He provides child support, a figure I’m sure my father negotiated in my favor, and we left open the possibility of visitation. I argued against that point
, but my dad said Ryan and his parents would cut the child support payments to the legal minimum if the visitation wasn’t included. I wasn’t allowed to stay at home with our parents, so I needed the money. I signed the papers, found an apartment in the city, and did the best I could with a new baby and no help.”
“My mom and your dad didn’t help with anything?”
She tried to shrug away the painful truth. “Phone calls to check on us, promises to visit that never came to be. We were on our own.”
His eyes sharpened on her face before he returned his attention to the soup. He carried the pan to the kitchen, poured the contents into two bowls, and delivered hers with a spoon, napkin, and a bottle of water.
“Thank you.” She waited for him to retrieve his bowl and sit next to her on the floor. He crossed his ankles and sampled the soup. “Not bad.”
“It’s good. I was hungry.”
“I could tell.” When she stared at him questioningly, he said, “Your color. You get pale when you need to eat.”
How did he know that? How did he remember those little details and yet not know how fast her heart beat with him sitting next to her in front of a roaring fire? “You get surly when you’re hungry.”
He grunted and took another bite. “Was it hard? Being on your own with a kid?”
“I did the best I could.” She had no words to describe the depths of her love for the child that changed her life and the accompanying loneliness from losing Tommy and contact with everyone she knew and loved. “Every day was about survival. I had no way of knowing what life would be like with an infant—the lack of sleep, the stages that seemed to shift every time I thought I had a handle on things. The first few years were a blur.” She took a bite and had some water as the memories flooded back. She still didn’t know how she’d managed to make it through each day.
“I got a job at Holcomb when Alex was three. They had an inter-office daycare, so it was perfect. Holcomb’s wife, Elise, ran the daycare, and we became friends. I was so happy to be around people again. I’d become pretty isolated, and the social interaction was wonderful. I did a good job, finished my degree, and got promoted to Holcomb’s management team. This job at Bear Stream is my first as a project manager.”
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