Clark, Rachel - Alicia's Awakening (Siren Publishing Ménage Amour)

by Rachel Clark

  “Lean forward,” he says. “Put your palms on the bench.”

  It brings my clit exactly into the right place and I can’t help but rock as sensation overwhelms me. I’m so turned on by the spanking earlier that I doubt I could stop now even if the entire city fire department knocked down the front door.

  Over and over I rub my clit against the chair, moaning as every muscle in my body pulls tighter.

  “Open your eyes. Look at me.”

  I do as I’m told. Doug has moved to stand in front of me, his gaze holding mine as deep tremors begin to shake through my body. Fuck. I’m usually hiding by now, retreating into my own world, savoring my orgasm as it finally begins. But Doug stays there, somehow a part of my climax even though he’s not touching me.

  I start to move faster, gasping as the rocking, rolling movement starts to echo through my entire body. Every limb is starting to shake. Every nerve ending is snapping and sizzling as heat rushes through me. I can’t look away. I can’t see or hear or think or imagine anything other than the man in front of me and the orgasm streaking through me.

  Moaning, I drop forward, my elbows giving out, my gaze still glued to his, our link unbroken as the final waves of ecstasy flow over me. My breathing is harsh, gasping, shaky, my limbs heavy, my pussy swollen, my clit achingly sensitive as I finally come down from that amazing peak. Doug smiles at me, takes a step closer, and then presses a soft, approving kiss to my forehead.

  Holy fuck. That was the hottest thing I’ve ever done. I’ve never even considered masturbating in front of someone before, but somehow Doug made it seem so natural.

  “Thank you,” he says quietly. “Rest for a few minutes.” He lifts a hand to my face, urging me to place my head on the bench. Again I do as he orders, grateful for the cool marble under my cheek. He leaves the room and returns a few minutes later with a towel.

  He seems to hesitate before handing it to me.

  “Get cleaned up,” he says quietly. “Then I’ll drive you home.”

  I nod even though I don’t really want to go home. I want to race him to his bedroom and ride his hard cock all night long. Fuck, considering how little we know each other, I’m actually very grateful for his levelheaded attitude.

  * * * *

  Lachlan sighed as he finally switched off the television. He’d been hoping that Doug would call him tonight. The “date” seemed to have gone pretty well, and Alicia apparently hadn’t minded that Doug was a rather dominating personality. The fact that she left the restaurant with him certainly suggested she responded well to the man. Doug had far more experience when it came to training submissives, so Lachlan felt confident that he’d be able to assess whether Alicia would accept his lifestyle.

  Hell. He was prepared to give it up if she didn’t, but he at least wanted to know he’d explored the options before throwing away his own chance to be really happy. He wanted Alicia regardless, but it would be much easier if she accepted his dominant tendencies.

  He wandered into the bathroom still annoyed at himself for not being able to tell what Alicia liked. He was able to identify other submissives—both trained and untrained—in the wider population, but when it came to his best friend he was totally blind. Doug had suggested that, because they’d grown up together, Lachlan was simply too close to her to be able to tell. That was how they’d come up with this crazy “double date” idea in the first place.

  But as he thought back over dinner he couldn’t help but chuckle at Alicia’s choice of date for him. She knew him well enough to know Lisa’s personality would hit every wrong note where he was concerned. It actually pleased him to think Alicia was possessive enough of him not to want to set him up with one of her friends.

  Although he doubted Lisa was actually one of her friends. If she was, he and Alicia were going to have a long talk about her choice of friends.

  But at least the whole night had given him hope for the future.

  Chapter Four

  I keep glancing at the clock and wondering why time is going so slow. I’m plowing through an extraordinary amount of work today and keep wondering how I’m able to do it. Even the Masterson account that I’ve been avoiding because of its insanely complex individual tax ruling seems to make sense today. A part of me suspects that I only think I understand it because I’m in such a good mood.

  My chair moves slightly as I turn to reach for a file folder, and the delicious pain in my rump reminds me all over again of everything I experienced last night. Never in my life had I considered a harsh spanking followed by masturbation in front of an amazingly appealing man would be a recipe for a good night’s sleep. But here I am. Living, breathing, working-my-ass-off proof.

  The phone ringing actually startles me. I get phone calls all the time, but my mind had wandered so far away from reality it’s a shock to realize I’m still sitting in my office.

  I answer the phone in my professional voice, pleased to realize it only holds the slightest of quivers.

  “Have you spoken to Lisa today?” Lachlan asks without even saying hello.

  “No,” I say in a suddenly grumpy voice. I have no idea what happened between the two of them after Doug and I left. Suddenly I’m imagining Lisa and Lachlan having hot sweaty monkey sex. Shit. Considering what I got up to last night, I have no right to be jealous.

  Aww fuck. I really have no right to be jealous.

  He’s my best friend. The very least I should want is for him to be happy. Yes, I’ve held a candle for him all these years—and even when I think of Doug and the things we did last night I can’t help wishing Lachlan had been there as well—but maybe it’s time for me to shelve my own selfish desires.

  Wait. Rewind.

  As well?

  Holy crap, I’ll think on that idea a little later. When did I get so kinky?

  But that thought makes my stomach feel like a lead balloon.

  Kinky or not, I am one very selfish friend. It’s definitely time to give up my own obsession and let the man be happy. My best friend asked for help to find a date. The very least I could have done was introduce him to someone he might actually like. Lachlan is a great guy, and he deserves to be happy.

  “I’m sorry,” I blurt out, still having no idea what went on between the two of them after I left. “You might like Penny better, or maybe the new girl Alison.”

  “It’s okay,” Lachlan says in a reassuring voice. “How did your date go?”

  Mine? Do I really want to tell him?

  “Doug’s a nice guy,” I say in what I hope is a neutral tone. I’m only just getting used to the fact that I could want someone besides Lachlan in my bed. The kooky fact I want them both is something I do not want to think about right now.

  “Did you fuck him?”

  “What?” I exclaim. I’ve heard Lachlan and his buddies talk like this for years, but he’s never been quite so direct with me.

  “Sorry,” he mumbles, sounding shocked by his own question. “Look, I’m sorry. It’s none of my business.” I can almost see him running a hand down his face in agitation.

  “Lach, what’s wrong?” I’m getting some seriously weird vibes from this conversation, and I’m not sure it’s all related to my lousy choice of a blind date for him.

  “Nothing,” he says, “just tired.” He takes a deep breath and I already recognize his way of changing the subject when it’s something he doesn’t want to talk about. “I actually rang to let you know I’ve been called out of town. I’ll be away until the twelfth of next month.”

  “That’s nearly five whole weeks,” I say, feeling more than a little depressed. I hate it when he goes away. I know it’s part of his job, but it always leaves me feeling off-balance.

  “It’s okay, brat. I’ll be back before you know it,” he says in that annoying older-brother voice he used on me for years. Had I only imagined we’d somehow moved past that sort of relationship? “I’m sure Doug will keep you busy while I’m gone.”

  “Doug?” I ask, almost not recogn
izing the name. Selfish bitch that I am, all I can think about is how Lachlan leaving affects me.

  “He’s a good guy,” Lachlan says. “He’ll make you happy.”

  “Maybe,” I say, not really agreeing or disagreeing. Doug does make me happy, but so does Lachlan. Images of what both men could do to me if we all got naked and sweaty together dance through my mind. Fuck, I am one seriously messed-up person.

  “Look, I need to get going,” Lachlan says in a tone of voice I don’t recognize.

  “You’ll call me?” I ask worriedly. It’s not just my own bizarre thoughts coloring the conversation. Something is off about this phone call.

  “I’ll be busy most of the time.” Panic streaks through me. This feels like good-bye.

  “But you always call,” I say. I wince at the childish, whiny voice that comes out of my mouth. But this time I really, really don’t want him to go. I drag in a deep breath as I try to hold the grief back.

  “I will call,” he says in a totally different voice. “Maybe not every night like I usually do, but I promise to stay in touch.”

  “O–Okay,” I say, still feeling off-balance, but at least relieved to know I’d sort of misread him. This isn’t good-bye…yet.

  “He’ll look after you, Alicia.”

  And then the phone goes dead and I suddenly don’t want to be alone in my office. Hell, I never need human interaction. I usually even time my coffee breaks to avoid the other people in the office, but I glance at the clock, notice it’s time for the unofficial Friday afternoon coffee break, and grab my cup.

  I can’t even explain it to myself, but right now I don’t want to be alone.

  * * * *

  Doug stared at the phone in his hand as if it were a live snake.

  “When did this happen?” he asked quietly. He knew enough about human nature to realize something had spooked his friend rather badly. The fact that they’d already discussed what had happened last night between himself and Alicia didn’t stop him from wondering if he was to blame for Lachlan’s sudden business trip.

  “I’ve been putting it off for a while,” Lachlan said rather vaguely. “I should have done it a while ago, actually. And well, now that I know you’ll be looking out for Alicia I don’t need to worry about being away for so long.”

  “Now tell me the real reason,” Doug said in a tone that usually had submissives jumping to attention.

  As a Dom, Lachlan wasn’t quite as intimidated, but he was still experienced enough to respect Doug’s seniority.

  Lachlan let loose a self-deprecating laugh and finally explained the reason for his actions.

  “I didn’t even notice she was having panic attacks. Some pathetic friend I am.”

  “She hides them well,” Doug assured him.

  “Don’t blow smoke up my ass,” Lachlan said in a sullen version of his usual laid-back humor. “I missed it. Plain and simple. I wasn’t even sure she was submissive until you told me this morning.” He breathed out heavily. “What good am I to her if I can’t even see what’s obvious?”

  “Lachlan, I’m not blowing smoke. She really does hide it well, but if you’re feeling like this, then maybe you should take the trip now. Give yourself a chance to get your head on straight.”

  The man on the end of the line grunted, and Doug wasn’t certain if it was an affirmative answer or not. Silence dominated the conversation for a few moments before Lachlan finally said, “Maybe you should train her while I’m gone.”

  Doug was already shaking his head—that was a seriously bad idea especially considering the fact that he hadn’t been able to get the woman out of his mind all day—but then Lachlan added, “She’ll need a best friend to talk to when things get too intense. I’ll call her every night.”

  “Okay,” Doug said against his better judgment. This little conspiracy had disaster written all over it. “But when you get back, you tell her everything.”

  “I will,” Lachlan said, “but maybe I was never meant to be anything more than her best friend.”

  He hung up before Doug could think of a retort.

  Chapter Five

  I can’t believe how much I’m tingling all over. I’d never even heard of a BDSM club before Doug mentioned it, but now I can’t wait to see what’s inside. At the ordinary-looking reception counter, the woman gives him something plastic while giving him a friendly smile.

  He turns to me and holds out his hand. I already know from some of our quick discussions on Dom-sub etiquette that it means he wants me to place my wrist in his grip. As soon as his fingers close around my arm, I want to sigh. How can such a simple contact make me feel so much?

  The bright yellow hospital-style tag that he fastens around my wrist is a sign to everyone inside the club that I am a newbie, here only to observe and learn. If I agree to be trained, the next time I come here they’ll give me a green wristband and I’ll be wearing way less clothing—none at all if my Dom says so.

  But today I get to observe and learn and maybe talk to other submissives without the concern that I’m breaking rules I don’t quite understand, yet. I do know not to speak unless spoken to and to keep my gaze lowered unless instructed to do otherwise. I’m also very aware that I am not to leave Doug’s side. It’s all a little intimidating, but I don’t feel anywhere near as nervous as I expected.

  Most of that has to do with the man still holding my wrist and speaking quietly to the receptionist.

  “Ready?” he finally asks. Of course that’s when the nerves hit me.

  I nod woodenly and try to drag in a discreet breath. The flick against the tip of my finger shows that he noticed. Damn. I used to be so good at hiding the effects of a full-blown panic attack. Now I can barely get worked into a tizzy before the man notices.

  “Pick a safe word,” he says sternly.

  I shake my head. We already discussed this. Nothing is going to happen at the club. Not even if I beg him. This visit is to show me what being a submissive is all about. Why would I need a safe word?

  “Pick a safe word,” he says in a slightly less intimidating voice, “to use if you’re feeling overwhelmed. It will let me know immediately that you want to leave.”

  “I don’t want to leave,” I say reflexively. The flick against the end of my fingertip suggests that’s the wrong answer. I scramble to think of a special word. I already know it can be any word in the world, but shit, there are so many to choose from. Stupid, humungous, word-filled language.

  “Choose a word that scares you,” he demands. I can see him lining up to flick my fingertip once more. Childishly, I consider closing my hand, but I suspect that will just make things a whole lot worse for me. Considering some of the punishments we’d discussed briefly on the way over here, I’m starting to rethink the whole thing. “Cabbage,” I blurt out.

  He grins at me. “You’re scared of cabbage?”

  I nod, knowing how silly it seems, but there is a story behind my choice.

  “Later you are going to explain that to me,” he says as he leans over and presses a kiss to my lips. “But right now you are going to be a good sub and make your Dom proud.”

  “Yes, Sir,” I say quickly, feeling ridiculously pleased by his happy grin.

  * * * *

  Doug escorted her into the scene area of the club. Over the years he’d grown used to the sights and sounds—even knew how overwhelming they could be for someone who’d never been inside a BDSM club—but with Alicia’s hand held firmly in his own it was like he was seeing it through new eyes.

  The trouble was that he was already thinking of her as his sub.

  His.

  She hadn’t even agreed to the training she would require to actually be his sub, and there was the whole matter of Lachlan to consider as well, but he couldn’t shake the possessive feeling. Or how right it felt.

  Hell, maybe he shouldn’t offer to train her. He should just insist that Lachlan do it when he got back and stay the hell out of it. But one look at the woman beside him made a
ll of his doubts seem cowardly. He could train her like he’d trained every other sub, and then hand her to her Dom when the time came.

  It was what he did best after all—no emotional attachment, no possessive feelings, only a sense of pride for the trainee sub as she found contentment in a world few outsiders would understand.

  He could do this for Alicia…and Lachlan.

  Alicia seemed intimidated at first, but soon she started to relax, moving closer against him when a scene grew in intensity. She trembled each time a sub screamed in orgasm, but it was obvious her reaction wasn’t from fright. She was excited, turned on, and very, very interested.

  He was already drafting their training contract in his mind when it finally occurred to him that he was willing to add sexual penetration into the agreement. He usually shied away from intercourse with a trainee. Often, it confused the issue more than it helped. Submission wasn’t actually about sex.

  It was an attitude adjustment, an acceptance of self, rather than a race to orgasm.

  Although, in Alicia’s case, the orgasm had been amazing to watch.

  Chapter Six

  I’m pretty sure I’ve never been this turned on. There was a time in my life when I quite enjoyed sex, but then the obsession with my best friend had begun, and my inclination to imagine sex with Lachlan had turned me off actual sex with anyone else.

  Until a week ago when I met Doug.

  Now as we wander through the scantily dressed crowd of Doms and their subs I find myself thinking more and more about sex with Doug. What would it be like? Would he just take me? Lift me against a wall and thrust his cock inside me? Or would he bend me over and fuck me from behind? I shiver all over at the images dancing through my head.

  He’s already told me he likes to tie subs down and fuck every hole at will. But he was talking experienced subs, women who know what’s what, not trainees.