by Tiana Laveen
She looks absolutely exhausted…
The boys were back in school, Isis had many play dates with children her age now, and with all the running around in the cold temperatures, Saint figured it would be nice for the two of them to just have their new home all to themselves for a change. He’d already arranged for Lawrence and Donna to keep the kids overnight. Matter of fact, Donna volunteered, wanting to return the repeated favors of Xenia doing the exact same for their little one.
As if reading his mind, she looked into his eyes and asked, “Okay, now that you’ve wowed me and I’m over the shock of it all, where are my children?”
“With Donna and Lawrence…”
She nodded and seemed to reflect on that a bit.
“I see.” she tapped her finger against her lower lip. “And what did I do to deserve all of this?”
“You’re you, isn’t that enough?” He ran his hand soothingly over her shoulder. “Here, let me get this.” He helped her slide out of her coat and slung it over his arm, butler style. “Stay right there, I’ll be right back.” He disappeared, and returned with a glass of white wine, a strawberry floating in it. Her eyes widened in surprise as the music grew a bit louder, playing Teddy Pendergrass’ ‘Lady.’
“Xenia, I want you to listen, I mean really listen to the words of this song… This is what my heart thinks of you every second of the day…’I’m your knight and shining armor…and I love you’…”
Pressing her to him, he leaned in and caressed the top of her ear with his lips. As they slowly swayed back and forth to the music and he lavished her face with tender kisses, her body trembled softly in his arms. They remained quiet, embracing one another tightly, as the pain, fear and torture finally released from her body, right there while he rocked her steady, easing her tension away.
“That’s right…you are the love of my life, Xenia.”
“You’re mine too, baby.”
Damn, she feels so good…
He tightened his arms around her waist. The softness of her breasts pushed against him and the warmth of her body encompassed his soul, touching him all over like the heat from a glowing flame.
“Mmmm…” she murmured. He lifted her chin with two fingers, bringing her gaze to his.
“What are you thinking about right this moment?” he asked with a hint of a smile.
“Just about how wonderful it feels to be in your arms, and you always seem to know what I need.”
He stroked her hair and laid a kiss on the side of her neck. “We can do whatever you want tonight. Anything you like…” he stated before landing yet another kiss on her, this one right on the lips.
She looked deeply into his eyes and tenderly wrapped her arms around his neck.
“I love slow dancing with you right now, I think.” She paused and smiled. “I think we can just play this by ear, go with the flow.”
“I like that.”
She kissed his nose.
“I like that very much,” he repeated.
They kept slow dancing until Teddy belted the last lyric. Then, she slowly released him, exhaled and looked at the dining room table.
“Here,” he clapped his hands and grabbed one seat. “Let me pull out your chair, baby.”
She sat down, unwrapped her linen napkin and placed it over her lap.
“Saint.” She watched eagerly as he removed the silver dome top over a platter, revealing two steamed lobsters, fresh red peppers and cardamom jus. “I was just getting ready to say again how good this smells, but my goodness!” She laughed giddily, even throwing her head back. “It is magnificent! Where in the world did you get this meal from?” She eagerly grabbed her glass of wine and took a quick sip before setting her sights once again on the dinner before her.
“Baby.” He took a seat right beside her. “We can get any kind of food we want, anytime we want. We’re in Manhattan.” He slicked a cigar out of his pocket and placed it beside his pre-poured glass of brandy for his after dinner liquor.
Taking his hand, she glanced down at her plate once more, then turned to him. “Well, everything looks delicious. I can tell you put a lot of thought into this.” She blinked reflectively as she paused, grasped the napkin she’d put across her lap and stared down at it. “Saint…”
He gripped her hand a bit tighter and leaned forward, as if afraid he’d miss one utterance, one important shared thought, one sugar coated word.
“I love you so much. I found out a lot about myself since we’ve moved here. Things that…” She shook her head as her eyes glossed over, then, she slowly raised her face and looked into his eyes. “Things I just didn’t know.”
“And those things, Xenia, should have been that you’re stronger than you thought you were, more resilient…that you’re an even better mother and wife than you imagined and can handle just about any situation thrown your way.”
She smiled and nodded in agreement. “I trust myself now. I trust my judgment.”
“That’s good, and I trust your judgment, too. I never want you involved, ever again, in what I do regarding my spiritual journey. That was too much for me. You’re my wife, and you are never to be out in those streets with me like that again.” He slid his hand away from her and touched his chest. “I just want you to be Xenia…the woman I fell in love with.”
She nodded, smiled shyly, and tossed her glance back towards the floor as he grasped her hands once more.
“In this crazy world, there are some things I don’t understand.” She shrugged. “I’m not going to pretend that I do. But I do know that God answers prayers, and he answered mine when I needed him most.” She swallowed, her gaze finding its way back to his. “I still don’t need to know the details of everything you do.”
They both burst out laughing.
He nodded and looked briefly away. “Yeah, I can dig that.” Chuckling, he scooted in a bit closer to her, causing their knees to touch. He slicked his tongue over his bottom lip and bit into it, looked at her with hungry eyes.
“Don’t look at me like that.” She smirked, shifting from side to side.
“How am I looking at you?” His voice dropped as he cocked his head to the side, brandishing a sexy grin.
She kept her hand in his, and grinned. “You know how you’re lookin’ at me…”
“Mmmmm,” he moaned as he scanned her from the top of her curly, soft head down to her black leather boots. “I’m just admiring what my Creator gave me. No harm in that.”
He drifted a bit closer. Her lips parted as she anticipated his next move. But instead, he opted to tease her for a few seconds longer, and not give her the lip lock she so desired.
“…No harm in that at all.”
He zoned in on her face, inhaled her perfume then gently nibbled her bottom lip, sealing it with a kiss. Finally, he placed his forehead against hers.
“I wonder… how do you keep lobster warm?” she asked with a crooked grin.
Saint smiled, showing all of his teeth. “I doubt we could microwave it…but I’m sure we could look online or somethin’.”
Xenia slowly got to her feet and reached for him as Billy Joel serenaded, “New York State of Mind.” With her brown fingers, she tugged gently at his crisp white shirt collar, tugging it downward, and stared into his eyes while she undid one button after another. Slowly walking backward, he followed her lead, careful to not stumble, move too fast, though he was filled to the brim with overflowing passion for the woman. Before long, they were crossing the foyer, headed towards the polished, gleaming stairs. Taking over, he picked the woman up in his arms, tossing her a bit in the air and eliciting a high-pitched Mariah Carey type squeal, and carried her as quickly as he could up to their bedroom.
“I’m going to do naughty things to you!” Xenia teased as she tossed her head back.
Her throaty moan, wrapped around a raspy laugh, made his damn dick hard.
“Naughty things? Baby, I’m the king of naughty. You didn’t get the memo? I plan to return the favor, baby. My
name might be Saint, but we gonna get into some damn right sinful shit tonight!”
She burst into a fit of laughter.
He reached their bedroom, shouldered the door open only to reveal another romantic layout for her eyes only. Music immediately bellowed from the entertainment center—Teddy Pendergrass’ ‘Turn Off the Lights.’ Smiling, she snuggled into his chest, her hair brushing against his chin. The simple yet erotic feel of her natural movements grabbed his cock with an invisible hand and shook that motherfucker until it thickened beyond control. He couldn’t hold back the swirl of purple fog that escaped from the side of his crooked grin. He laid her down upon a bed of white petals like the prized possession that she was, then claimed her… ravishing the woman’s body, making sweet love to her mind and soul, all naughty night long…
The End
…Wait, one more thing…
*
Saint’s love letter to Xenia…
To my Dearest, Beloved Queen,
Tonight, I’ve prepared a special celebration for you. Everything is just how I want it. I am sitting in my office, writing you this letter before you arrive home and discover your surprise. Right now, one of your favorite songs is playing—‘Fall In Love’ by KeKe Wyatt. It always makes me think of you…you get real wild in bed when that tune plays, ride me like a fucking bucking bronco, but let me stop, I’m getting sidetracked…you know I’m smiling right now. Now, don’t get scared about the dinner, baby. No, I haven’t cooked it myself. If I had, you’d soon be at the hospital getting your stomach pumped versus enjoying a relaxing evening at home with your man. That’s not exactly what I had in mind, and neither did you… In any case, I took the time to spoil you this evening because you more than deserve it. You are the love of my life, Xenia Aknaten. I know I tell you that I love you every day, it can never be said too often, but showing you with my actions is equally important.
The way I have this planned is that when you walk through the door, I would greet you, feed you, make love to you. Sometimes, things get derailed though, and lust decides to have its way so I won’t be surprised if dinner comes last, and we cum first. In any case, this night is dedicated to YOU. We’ve been through a lot as a couple, baby. We’ve been through more than the average couple I believe, but you have had to deal with some shit I would not wish on anyone. For most women are not married to an Angel Child, let alone a multi-tiered one, at that. Please, do not think that I do not consider what it is like to be in your shoes. I personally don’t know if I would’ve been able to handle being a civilian married to the likes of a person like me, and that makes me even more in awe of you. I know how I am, and you love me in spite of it all. You’re my backbone when I feel like just lying down somewhere and being left alone. You’re my feet when I’m too weary to take another step. You’re my mind when I’m not thinking straight. You’re my heartbeat when my murmur gets extra spastic. Xenia, you are my everything…
I want to talk to you about that a bit more. Do you understand just how one and the same we are? How connected? I believe that you do, but I want to break this down further. When you exhale, I inhale, and vice versa. If you’ve ever woken in the middle of the night and looked at me, the way my chest rises and falls, it is always in sync with yours. This is in part due to the fact that when we make love, we share each other’s DNA, our genetics. This is one of the many reasons why sex is so spiritual, so important, as I explain in the conferences to the Rainbeaus. I have completely reprogrammed you. My body, mind and spirit married yours. By making love to you, I’ve changed how you walk, talk, smell, listen, taste and see the world.
Your genetic pain is inside of your womb, baby. Women carry their pain in their gut. It can travel around to your back as well, but as far as the womb—that is your core. The first time I made love to you, I expected to find the hurt, and I did. So much emotional trauma…so much worry. Each stroke, every thrust of my penis inside of you helped to filter it, remove it, set you free, because my intentions for you were pure and all I wanted was for you to let me love you. I would not take from you without putting something back, without giving and helping to restore. A man can either help restore and repair a woman, Xenia, or he can push toxins, poisons inside of her if his spirit and intentions are not pure. We are both taking in and putting out energy. We are giving and receiving, but you are the receiver. Our bodies dictate this, so me, as your man, must always be careful with your spirit…
When I took you inside of me, via cunnilingus, ate your pussy, I brought you INTO my body. That is a spiritual connection. Sex, as you already know, is for procreation. It is also for connection between two souls. That connection is a soul elevation. We are nothing but energy, and we exchange energy, when we make love. We are constantly taking in energy, from morning to night. Just walking around, we take in toxins, and we take in air. When making love, it is the same principles, only more powerful. This is why the man disappears inside of the woman’s body—we literally become one. A part of us, the source of life that we use to procreate, is pushed inside of you, hidden during lovemaking. Our genitalia is on the outside, yours on the inside, but we reverse that during intercourse.
When we thrust inside of you, we disappear, when we withdraw during thrusting, if you look closely, the lining of your pussy clings to our shaft, as we draw you out. It is now exposed. You know that I talk about chakras all the time. One thing you should know, as my soulmate, is that even our chakras are now linked, Xenia. Your vaginal fluid is like cerebral fluid, and pre-cum, the penis’ natural lubricant and extra insurance for pregnancy, is also such. It is supposed to be ingested and shared with your mate. You can’t stop it from being shared during unprotected intercourse and oral sex; it is virtually impossible. Our brains are very busy during sex, contrary to some belief systems. They are communicating with our lower chakra while we engage in sexual activity, and if we listen, we become better lovers.
When you and I become one via our sexual expression to one another, we are healing each other, Xenia. This whole business we had to take care of, and the impact it had on our marriage was simply a small piece of the iceberg. We communicate with one another verbally, nonverbally and on a spiritual level, my love. That spiritual level is many times expressed via our sex life. Koki discovered something about me that many did not understand—and that is, I am healed through sex with you.
Xenia, I have discovered that my sex addiction actually led me to you. Let me explain. I was addicted to sex for all the reasons I’ve stated in the past. In that alone, dysfunction thrived. However, when I met you, and you became my obsession, and I fell in love with you so hard, my weakness itself further let me know you were the only woman for me, and I could be devoted and faithful to you, regardless of my high sex drive and all that that entails.
I do not think as clearly when we go too long without it, because as stated, cerebrally, you are tied into me. Xenia, you are my anchor. You keep me level, you keep me steady. Before you entered my life, baby, I was all over the fucking place. I had a hard time focusing sometimes, too. Now, yes, I made do, but it was completely different after we connected. Once we became a couple, it is like my mind completely opened up. I felt a sense of physical power I hadn’t had before, either. It also made me more willing to listen to myself, and accept myself for who and what I was. It allowed my best friend, Raphael, to finally get through to me. He’d tried for years, baby. He wanted to talk to me about my abilities, but I wanted to keep running, and not deal with it.
Until you came into my life…
Then suddenly, I was at least a bit more open to the idea of hearing him out. You’ve changed me, forever. You made a man of me. You made me feel things I never dreamed possible. So when you told me you’d leave me, so I could be happy, you did not understand that you leaving me would kill me. You’d chop my arms and legs off, and rip out my heart, too. I can do NOTHING without you. You’re my heart. You’re my air. You protect me, even when you sleep. I’ve known this for years, but it became even cle
arer after Koki set out to devastate me. He knew, even more than I, the impact this would have on me. I’ve gone without sex before, you know this, but I wasn’t preparing for battle at those points.
Usually, those periods of abstinence were for a greater cause, thus, I was able to handle it better and I knew it would not last forever. When you rejected me, something inside of me changed, died a bit. I had no idea how to fix it, and became deeply concerned it could not only last for months, but through the duration of our marriage. I was ashamed and afraid. Koki knew this; he understood the lack of sex was only one component. Xenia, not being inside of you is not what hurt me the worst. What hurt me most was the rejection…not being wanted by you. Even when you thought I had cheated on you with Payton, I knew a part of you still wanted me, so the sexual abstinence I forced on us to bring you back to me did not have the same ramifications. YOU. STILL. DESIRED. ME! That was the key, and he was intelligent enough, cunning enough, evil enough, to figure that out; thus, he took his next course of action and it nearly destroyed us.
But it didn’t work. He failed. I got the information I needed, when I needed it. Just as Lawrence and my father have assured me for years that I would. You are the Queen of this family. Thus, I highly respect you, bow down to you, kiss your feet and your jewel-covered hand as you sit by my side. You have given me two beautiful princes and a princess—even as I write this letter, I can’t stop smiling about these three blessings in our lives. You believed in me, when things looked bleak. You took a chance on me, when all you saw was a crazy man who tried to fuck you into oblivion but loved the shit out of you, too. I was insane, scattered, and I still am to some degree, but you know I’m sincere and you know I’d turn this world inside out to keep you, and make you happy. You have been more than I could ever dream of, Xenia. Every time I put my lips up to yours, the softness of your mouth drives me crazy. Every time I wrap my arms around your small waist, my thoughts drift to keeping you in that embrace as long as I can.