by Fields, MJ
“Okay,” I smiled and quickly looked at my hands.
“What does okay mean? What do you want from me?” Jase voice was deeper.
I took a deep breath and looked up at him, “I leave here to go back home soon. I wish I had time to get to know you. I …I know I like you. But I also know you have a girlfriend, and I know I don’t like the thought of kissing someone else's boyfriend. Although I have to say the whole possessive, ownership, over someone is pretty lame. I mean we are young and learning and growing right? How the hell are we supposed to know if we love someone. My God my friends back home say I love you to a different boy each time they put out. It’s insane. But what do I know? Life is so confusing,” when I realized I had just went on a rather embarrassing tangent I looked up at him, “Wow I am so sorry.”
“No,” he laughed, “Do go on.”
I laughed, “No I think I will stop there thanks. Thanks for the chat,” I stood up and so did he.
“I really didn’t mind,” Jase smiled and shoved his hands in his pockets.
He walked with me for a bit looking at the water and then at me, “I still want to hang out Carly.”
“Even after that, are you insane?” I laughed.
“Possibly, that’s debatable I guess. I don’t know. But I do know you seem…I don’t know different,” He stopped and smiled at me.
“Hold on, I am different from most girls,” I flipped my hair back and did my best to give him a sexy sultry look, “I have heard that’s one of The Lines boys use to get into a girls panties Jase.”
He smiled, “Really, that’s what you have heard huh?”
I laughed and we kept walking.
“Let me ask you something, how many boyfriends have used that one on you? And help me out here Carly…did it work?” he wink causing me to laugh.
“No,” I smiled.
“No, it didn’t work?” he asked curiously.
“Well technically I haven’t had a boyfriend since like sixth grade, and no it would not have worked,” I smiled up at him.
“Really?” Jase looked at me like I was crazy.
“Really, and don’t look at me like that,” I pushed him in jest, “I have moved a lot. And I am quite an over achiever.”
Jase grabbed my hand and walked up to a vendor cart and grabbed a couple sodas and hotdogs, “Sit with me.”
We sat down at a picnic table on the boardwalk, and he handed the drink, and hot dog, “So than this would be your first date?”
I took a drink, “Well technically yes.”
He smiled, “Glad it could be with me.”
We sat silently while he ate his hotdog, “You are not hungry? Oh is this a girl thing, not eating on a date, so use guys are even more confused by what makes you all tick?”
“I am a vegetarian,” I smiled, “And I also think it would be crazy to accept an offer to go on a dinner date and not eat. See Jase, I would be horrible at this dating thing.”
He grabbed my hotdog and took a bit, “I don’t think so. I want to take you on a date.”
I blushed and looked away.
“Why does that embarrass you?” he grinned.
“You have a girlfriend..I am leaving…I thought we kind of covered all that,” I finally looked back at him.
“I can get rid of her,” he smiled and took a drink. I laughed at him, and he looked at me, “What?”
“Well, I don’t know how to say this, but I don’t think that would be a big loss. You two are awful together,” I laughed.
He smiled and laughed, “Yay I guess. But she hasn’t been any different than any of the other ones. You are all the same.”
His eyes, those damn dark brown gold flecked eyes were smiling. He was funny, really, really funny, and I laughed.
“I really like hanging out with you Carly,” he sat back and closed his eyes. He blew out a breath, slowly and then sat up and looked in my eyes. “I have an idea.”
“Do tell,” I smiled.
“How about we compromise. We hang out as often as you want until you leave. We do stuff together, like …I don’t know…a fake date?’ he looked happy and confused at the same time, and it made me laugh.
“You want to fake date me?” I smiled.
“Yay I want to fake date you,” Jase ginned back and grabbed my hand.
“You are fake holding my hand now huh?” I smiled.
“I am, and when your ready…I wanna fake kiss those lips Carly,” he looked again at my lips.
Immediately they went dry, and I licked them quickly and swallowed, “Please don’t say things like that,” I whispered.
“Okay,” he smiled, “You do have amazing lips though. Full, pink, pouty, wonderful lips.”
“Thanks?” laughing and embarrassed I looked away.
“You are welcome,” he squeezed my hands in his.
We walked to the corner of my fathers street, and he turned and smiled at me, “Tomorrow night Carly, I would love to fake date you…again.”
“Well then Jase, I would love to accept your very intriguing offer of another fake date,” I smiled.
“Same time?” he asked.
“Same place?” I asked back.
The way he smiled at me touched my heart I hoped my returned smiled would do the same for him.
Chapter 3
“Hello Carly,” Jase smiled when he saw me hurrying down the boardwalk.
“Sorry,” I smiled again running late.
Jase smiled as he pulled a leaf out of my hair, “Late for our first official fake date?
“Yay, the escape route was compromised,” I laughed, “My Daddy’s new friend was letting her little rat terrier out, and the thing started barking just as I was stepping out of my window.
He grabbed my hands and held them up inspecting my arms, “No bruises or bleeding?
“None,” I grinned like a fool.
“Good and you are not feeling an asthma attack coming on?” He smiled, and I swear I could have fallen into that dimple.
“Not yet,” I answered to quickly embarrassing myself.
“Alright then, you like to dance Carly?” he grabbed my hand and smirked as he dragged me behind him.
We walked down the boardwalk, and I couldn’t help but feel giddy. The streets were bustling. There were so many couples with their arms wrapped around each other, many kissing, lots of them kissing, wow. In public…, my Mom and her friends would flip.
PDA a topic they discussed at one of their Thursday night Book Club meetings. Such a controversial topic. I laugh out loud, and it stops Jase dead in his tracks. And of course I run right into him.
“Oops “ I giggle and try to step back. He holds me still my head is at his shoulder, he certainly is tall. I look up curious as to why he had not let go of me. His eyes are so brown, beautiful brown eyes and his pouty bottom lips, just makes me …, “Hang on there buddy.”
He closed his eyes, and his whisper hits my face, “When are you going to let me kiss you?”
“This is our first fake date Jase. My God what kind of girls do you think I am,” I force a laugh trying to make this situation less uncomfortable, “And PDA isn’t my thing.”
He opened his eyes and smiled at me, and I immediately regret stopping what I am sure would have been an amazing kiss, damn you book club!
“Is that a rule of yours? No PDA?” Jase stepped back shaking off his disappointment.
“Long story but no not really,” I smile when he takes my hand.
“But this is okay?” He looked at my hand.
“I have grown use to it,” I smiled.
“Okay then, so let's hear your long story about PDA,” he points to a bench on the beach, “Hold that thought, I will be right back.”
He grabs us each a drink at the nearest vendor stand as I take off my shoes and walk to the bench. He kicks off his sandals and sits beside me.
“Thanks,” I say taking a drink of a very fruity sweet iced drink, “That’s really good.”
He smiled, “PDA sp
ill it.”
I couldn’t help but laugh, “First you need to understand the book club. It’s a group of about five women that have gotten together ever since my mom started teaching at Sanford.”
“Your Mom is a teacher?” Oddly he looks like her truly cares.
“Yes, she teaches in the English department. A few of her colleagues get together every week and discuss varies genre’s of books. One night PDA became a topic and well it was interesting to say the least, to hear what they had to say. You really don’t want to know,” I smiled hoping he would drop it.
“No, I want to hear, then I will tell you how I feel about it,” he winked.
“How about you go first,” I really hope he would.
“I think it’s cool to hold hands,” he points at a couple walking by. “Kind of says we are together.”
“Mimi would say that it is to possessive,” I laugh thinking of Moms friend
“Who is Mimi?” he asks taking a sip of his drink and licks the red foam from his upper lip causing me to stare a bit to long. “If there is something on my face it would be polite to tell me Carly.”
“Nothing is on your face. Okay Mimi,” I clear my throat, “She is the world's biggest feminist. She is also the most opinionated about why Erotic books are in such demand these days.”
“Okay, wait are you part of this book club,” he smiles a slow smile making me think entirely to much about those lips again.
“Yes why?” I ask curiously, “Did I think I couldn’t read?”
“No, I just want to know what it is you read?” he laughed.
I know my face is red, “Whatever they are.”
“I think I can tell. Your face is as red as,” he paused to take a drink and licked his lips slowly as he chuckled and looked me up and down, “ As red as a cherry.”
I am sure this should annoy me, so I dig deep to come back with something as crude, “Or as red as the devils dick.”
He laughed a full throaty laugh, and I could not help but laugh too.
“Good movie,” he smiled and then those brown eyes mesmerized me, “Okay Mimi.”
“She thinks that young girls try to do whatever they can to please a guy, so they succumb to such Neanderthal ways. Now kissing is way to much for her in public, she thinks they need to get a room,” I laugh thankful that he redirected the conversation.
“So just because they kiss means they are going to get freaky,” his nose did a cute little move when he said freaky.
“Well I suppose it leads to that anyway,” I look at the sky, “That’s what she says anyway.”
“There are different kisses Carly. So this Mimi thinks a peck on the cheek is not cool when say you're dropping someone off at the airport or meeting them out for dinner?” He set his cup down next to the bench.
“I am thinking they were talking more than that,” I answered.
“Like what?” he smiled.
“Well when someone’s tongue is lodged down someone’s throat, and their hands are wandering, you know groping,” I answered quickly.
“What does your Mom say?” He takes my hand and now that feels uncomfortable to me.
“She doesn’t think groping is appropriate,” I look down at our hands.
“What do you say?” he smiles.
“I guess if your holding hands it’s cool. Kissing without tongue seems innocent, but not groping. That should be left for a time without an audience,” I answer.
It is quiet to long, and he is rubbing his thumb across my hand in a slow cadence. Barely a touch, somewhat harder, and then a circular motion. Barely a touch, somewhat harder, and then a circular motion
“Is this to much,” he asks quietly his eyes a little less twinkle and a lot more hot.
I shake my head no, but it is it’s nice, and it makes me….
“Okay aren’t we suppose to go dancing?” I stand quickly, and he smiles a smile indicating he is enjoying some sort of secret thought, one about me.
“Yay we can do that,” he stands up particularly close to me and I step back and almost fall.
He grabs my hand and waist laughs, “Carly, you are going to have to hold my hand when you and I are together so I can keep you safe; otherwise we are going to have to stop fake dating.”
I am sure a look of panic crosses my face because it causes him to look at me and closed his eyes.
When he opens them, he looks confused, “You know this might be a bad idea.”
“No!” I almost shout and cover my mouth quickly.
“Hey look this thing…I have a girlfriend Carly,” in a tone I am unfamiliar with from him.
“I am aware, this is just for fun,” I remind him of our arrangement.
“Is this fun for you?” he gasped.
“Right this moment no,” I scowled
“So this is okay with you, cheating is okay with you?”
I feel tears start to prick my eyes. I forced a smile, and I turn and walk away quickly, and I don’t look back.
~
I slept most of the afternoon away. I didn’t want to get out of bed. I actually lied to my father and told him I had my period. I knew there would be absolutely no questions after that. Just thinking about the face he made and how red he turned makes me laugh and feel a little better.
I spent the next day doing pretty much the same. I did read three books from my required summer reading list, boring. Which immediately reminds me of the book club, which reminds me of all the male bashing that goes on which reminds me of how much I miss Mom. I would call her right now, but I don’t want to interrupt her retreat. I know she wouldn’t mind, but I am going to be a senior and seriously need to learn to deal. Okay, I feel better.
My phone rings and my heart races and I dive from the end of the bed and throw the pillow on the floor, yes I have had the phone under my pillow in case it rang when I fell. It was Abe.
“Hey Abe,” I answered.
“Beach bonfire tonight I will pick you up,” he was excited.
“I really don’t feel all that well,” I was not lying I really didn’t, but not because I was physically ill.
“Come on I have been gone for three days and you leave soon. Please come hang out with me, please,” he was begging and it made me laugh.
“Fine, but if I have to leave early, don’t throw a big old fit,” I giggled.
“See you at nine,” he hung up.
I looked at the clock, and it was six, I looked in the mirror. Damn I looked like hell. I take a shower and shave my legs and dress quickly. I had not eaten nor did I feel like it. I better go be social.
“Feeling better?” Dad looked up from his computer.
“Yay, Abe wants me to go to the beach for a bonfire, I figured I should eat something first,” he acknowledges with a grunt, and I grab some yogurt and granola and woof it down.
~
Abe pulled up out front at nine on the dot, always so punctual. I walked out, and someone was sitting in the front seat, and my stomach did a flip. I thought I had the five minutes it took to get to the beach to prepare to have to face Jase. The door opened, and a tall sandy blonde hair guy stepped out and smiled. I thanked God and walked to the truck.
“Carly, I am Josh, Abe’s roommate from college. You are going to have to sit in the middle my legs are to long,” he laughed and held the door opened.
“Thanks,” I liked him immediately something very easy about him, very laid back.
Abe kissed my cheek making a loud smacking noise, “Did you miss me?”
“Yay actually I did,” Abe has always been my favorite cousin.
“So Josh is lucky enough to have me as a roommate this year,” Abe laughed and so did Josh.
“Yes Josh he is a catch,” I smiled and turned up the music.
We pulled into the parking lot across the beach, and the fire was already blazing, the music was loud, and there were about twenty people standing around with drinks in their hands. I did a quick scan of the crowd to see if Jase was there, and he was
not. I should have felt relieved, but I didn’t.
“Water is warm Carly, come on in,” Abe yelled and threw his shirt on the blanket I had laid out.
He grabbed his board and ran into the water. I love to watch Abe surf, he had been doing it all his life. Even competed sometimes.
I looked up at Josh who was now standing next to me, “I don’t know anyone else, I hope it’s alright, but I want you to know I am probably going to be like a shadow to you when he is in the water.”
“I get it, no big problem. Do you surf?” I was making small talk.
“No, never,” he laughed, “Missouri doesn’t offer a lot of opportunity to learn how to surf.”
“I suppose not,” I laughed, “You should have him teach you, he taught me.”
“You surf?” he was shocked.
“I wouldn’t say I am any good, but I can stand up or Pop as they say,” I grabbed a soda and offered him one he took it.
“Maybe you could teach me?” he asked quietly. I heard a voice in the background, and I knew he was here.
Chapter 4
“When did you do that?” one of the guys behind us asked.
“Yesterday,” Jase said quickly. He brushed past me, “That was fast.”
I looked at him confused, and he stopped and smiled a big obnoxious smile, “Hey Carly how are you, been awhile.”
I could smell alcohol, and I scowled, "Hi Jase”
“Why don’t you introduce me to your friend,” Jase walked back towards us.
“Josh this is Jase, Jase this is Josh,” I scowled at Jase.
Jase laughed and stuck out his hand, “Cool nice to miss you Josh.”
“You to, damn did that hurt?” Josh pointed to his…
“You got your nipple pierced?” I swear yelled.
“You like it Carly? Want to give it a little tug,” he winked and waited for my reply.
“I wouldn’t want to rip it out,” I turned away and looked at Josh. I don’t know why but I did I stared at him and it must have been for a long time because he chuckled uncomfortably.
Josh looked away from me and at Jase, “Did your parents get pissed?”
“My Mom did it,” Jase looked away from Josh and stared at me.
I was sure he was waiting for a reaction, so I gave him one, “Your Mom?”