The Suicide Princess

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The Suicide Princess Page 16

by Bryan, Anthony


  “One of my attorneys gets arrested for DUI and possession of hydrocodone and then identifies herself as a District Attorney to the arresting Trooper -- yes, Bradford, I tend to hear about this kind of thing very quickly.”

  “Mr. Webber, I know this looks bad, and I know I can't be directly on the case anymore, but please don't pull me off completely. This case means so much to me; please, let me see it through.”

  Webber looked at Stephanie with a look of complete disbelief on his face. “Are you serious? Do you truly believe I would let you anywhere near this case? Do you think I would let you prosecute a DUI homicide, after you got a DUI yourself?” Webber paused before continuing, “Is that what you think this is about, pulling you from the case? Do you think that’s what I’m doing?”

  “Yes, well that’s what I thought. Do you mean you’re not pulling me off?”

  “Bradford, it’s always something, and it’s just getting to be too much. You’re either leaving work without telling anyone, calling in sick, not showing up for court, and now this. Stephanie, I’m not pulling you off the case. I don’t know how to say this, but…” Webber paused before finishing, “Bradford, I’m terminating you. I'm sorry, but your fired.”

  “No, Bill, please don't fire me,” she pleaded. “I'm begging you, please. I can't lose this job, it means everything to me.”

  “Bradford, I’m sorry, but there’s just nothing more I can do for you. It's over. I'll give you ten minutes to gather your personal items from your desk and say goodbye. If you don't leave after that, I'm going to have you escorted out by security.”

  “Bill, please don’t do this to me! You don’t understand, you can’t do this to me!”

  “Don’t you dare put this on me,” Webber scorned. “I’m not doing anything to you. You damn well did this to yourself. Now get your things and go.”

  Stephanie watched with sorrow as Webber walked away. He was once her mentor, and he looked at her as his protégé of sorts, but now he couldn’t even look at her. She grabbed her purse and ran to Karen's office. At that moment, she needed Karen more than anything, but she found Karen's office empty. “Where's Karen?” Stephanie yelled to Karen's assistant.

  “She called in sick, Stephanie. Are you alright?” answered Karen's assistant from her desk right outside Karen’s office.

  “No! No! No!” Stephanie cried as she ran towards the elevators with nearly the entire office watching in horror as the events were unfolding before them.

  Stephanie tried to call Karen multiple times as she rode the elevator toward the lobby, but each call went to voicemail. “Where are you, Karen? I need you, please call me back,” she said in the voicemail as she reached the lobby and exited to the street.

  Stephanie stood on the bustling city sidewalk in the heart of downtown Boston, and she looked around, almost in a daze, as her world was inexplicably crashing down all around her. She needed someone to turn to – she needed anyone who could be there for her, but for the first time in her life, she felt as though she had no one. In her moment of immense suffering and vulnerability, she decided to reach for the only person she could, and she opted to disregard the recording of Derrick which she had heard.

  I don’t care what was on that recording, I know Derrick loves me, Stephanie irrationally thought as she placed a call to his phone. The call went straight to voicemail without ringing, and she knew he had turned his phone off. Why, Derrick, why today?

  Stephanie assumed Derrick was at work, and she drove to the coffee shop to wait for him. She quickly snatched up the only empty seat by the window where she had a clear view to the front of Derrick's building. As the day drew on, she impatiently waited and waited. Each time the doorman would open the door, she would only be disappointed to see someone other than Derrick walking from within. That was until the door opened, and Stephanie saw not Derrick, but another familiar face leave the building.

  Dressed in a seductively short denim skirt, tall heels, and a snug-fitting, dark blue tee, Karen walked from Derrick’s apartment building, and she quickly rounded the corner and strutted out of Stephanie's sight.

  Stephanie wanted to run to confront Karen, but her body was paralyzed with shock. She felt numb, and it took more than a minute before she could move, much less think of what she would possibly say to Karen. When she snapped out of her fog of shock and back to reality, Stephanie marched straight to the front door of Derrick's building.

  The doorman had become used to seeing Stephanie, and he greeted her with a smile; however, he kindly reminded her he was not able to allow her into the building.

  “Look,” said Stephanie with anger. “I just saw my friend, my best friend, walk out of here, and you know exactly what the fuck is going on. You do whatever you have to do, but I'm going in there and confronting him right now.”

  “I feel for you, believe me, I do. However, it doesn’t change the fact that I’m not authorized to let anyone in without a resident being present,” he reminded Stephanie for a second time.

  “Imagine if it were you standing here, having your life shattered. Even worse, imagine it was your daughter or your sister standing here instead of me. What would you do if it was someone you loved?”

  The doorman stood silent for a short moment before gently nodding his head and stepping to the side while opening the door.

  Bam! Bam! Bam! Stephanie slammed on the door of Derrick’s apartment. The knock echoed down the long industrial-style hallway, and she had no idea what she would even say to Derrick when he answered. She kept banging.

  Derrick opened the door, shirtless and wearing only a pair of workout pants, and he said, “Oh fuck… What are you doing here?”

  Stephanie asked, “What the fuck am I doing here? Seriously? That’s what you have to say to me right now?”

  “How did you get up here?”

  “The doorman let me up.”

  “He’s fired,” Derrick calmly replied. “You’re obviously pissed, and I'm not stupid. I know you must have seen her, so now you know.”

  “Now I know what Derrick? I don't know anything, other than the fact that I just saw my best friend walk out of here. How the hell did Karen even meet you?”

  “Look, it's just whatever now.” Derrick coldly said. He held the door barely open and positioned himself in a manner which indicated Stephanie was not invited in. He folded his arms and continued, “What do you want from me?”

  “Derrick, what the hell is going on? I thought you were falling in love with me?”

  “I don't know what to say. You caught me, and it's over. If you want to forget about what you saw, I’m cool with that. But if not, then it just is what it is.”

  “It is what it is? I thought you loved me. I lost everything for you!”

  As Stephanie was losing Jacob, and then losing her job, she thought her life couldn't get any lower. She thought she had hit rock bottom. Now that she was standing at Derrick's door, listening to what he had to say, she knew she had thrown it all away for nothing. The realization that it was all a lie was the proverbial salt in Stephanie’s wound which made her emotional pain agonizing.

  She broke down and begged Derrick, “Please, tell me why. Why did you do this to me?”

  Derrick, completely unfazed by Stephanie's intense emotion, cruelly said, “You were for fun. I'm sorry, but it was nothing more. If you got the wrong idea and thought there was something more between us, that's your problem and not mine.”

  Stephanie started to remind Derrick of the things he had said to her, and the emotions he shared, but Derrick just closed the door without offering even the slightest hint of an explanation. Everything Derrick said was a lie. She heard him lock the deadbolt on the other side of the door, and she fell to the ground crying.

  While lying on the cold, hard concrete floor, Stephanie cried and screamed, “I fucking hate you, Derrick! I fucking hate you!”

  ***

  Stephanie walked to her car, and before long, her phone began ringing. She looked at the displ
ay and saw the incoming call was from Karen. She knew Karen was either calling because she had just heard Stephanie had been fired or because Karen just heard from Derrick. Regardless of the reason for the call, Stephanie had no desire to even speak with Karen, and she ignored the call. Karen called repeatedly, but Stephanie knew there was nothing Karen could say that could even begin to fix Stephanie’s situation, and she ignored each subsequent call just as she had done the first.

  As Stephanie sat in the car, trying to calm herself enough to safely drive, her phone alerted to an incoming text from Karen which read, “Steph, please answer. Derrick told me what happened, but you need to let me explain. It's not what you think.”

  Stephanie replied, “It's exactly what I think. Stop calling me.”

  “No, Stephanie, it's not what you think. You need to let me explain this to you. You need to know what is happening.”

  “My life is over, Karen,” typed Stephanie. “In one day, my whole entire world just disappeared...that's what is happening.”

  Stephanie's phone began ringing with another call from Karen. Stephanie ignored this call as well, and Karen followed with the text message, “Stephanie, please answer.”

  “Stop calling me!” messaged Stephanie.

  Suddenly, Stephanie's phone began receiving a stream of incoming text messages from Karen, and she gathered it was actually one very long text message arriving in pieces. She began reading the extensive message as it arrived,

  “Stephanie, you need to know this. Derrick isn't who you think he is. I've known him for more than two years, and it's not a coincidence that he met you. I met him and I had a very short affair with him, but I broke it off after I started seeing the real him. He became so angry over me breaking up with him, and he refused to let me go. While I was with him, he took pictures of me doing things, sometimes very humiliating things, and he held those pictures over me. I basically became his fucking sex slave with him threatening to send the pictures to my husband, my family, my neighbors, and my co-workers if I didn't do every last thing he said. Then he used those pictures to make me take even more pictures and videos, and it formed a cycle where I feel like he owns me. He does own me, and he knows it.”

  “What does any of this have to do with me?” asked Stephanie.

  Karen's response began arriving on Stephanie's phone, “One day, about a week before you met him, he was picking me up from work. He saw me walking out with you, and he told me he wanted to have sex with you. He forced me to make it happen.” Karen continued to explain, “The day you met him, I told him where you were going to be, and that’s why I didn’t go to lunch with you.”

  “You knew what he was doing to you, and you just unleashed him on me?”

  “I tried to stop it, I really did. After you first met him, I told you it was a bad idea. I figured if I did my part, by setting him up with you, and you just weren't interested, he'd leave it alone, but he didn't. After you broke up with him, he told me he would ruin me if I didn't convince you to go back to him.”

  Stephanie fell into shock as she read each word of Karen's explanation. While she was having a hard time wrapping her head around the whole thing, one aspect was utterly confusing to Stephanie, and she asked, “If he only wanted to have sex with me, why didn't he just let it go after he did?”

  “Because he's sick, Stephanie. He was going to be done and break it off with you after he got what he wanted, but you broke it off with him first. You beat him to it, and he was furious that you broke up with him. He told me he was going to make you pay for doing that.”

  “Make me pay? For breaking up with him? Pay how?” asked Stephanie.

  “By ruining your life,” said Karen. “I told you, he's sick. He wanted you to leave Jacob for him, and the minute you did, he was going to drop you. He just wanted to ruin your life.”

  “You knew all this, and you let him do it? You were supposed to be my fucking friend, you cunt.” replied Stephanie, with her head swirling in the disbelief that her best friend had led her into such an atrocious trap. “You destroyed my life, Karen. Not Derrick, you!”

  “I'm so sorry, Stephanie, but you don’t understand. I'm afraid of him. I’m so afraid of him. He owns me, he uses me, and I know he's going to just throw me away when he's done. You have no idea what he does, what kind of things he makes me do.”

  “So, you set me up to fall into the same shit? God damn, Karen!” Stephanie said.

  “Please, Stephanie, please let me say I'm sorry to your face. After that, if you never want to look at me again, I'll completely understand. I'll give anything to say I'm sorry to you.”

  Stephanie wanted to hate Karen with every ounce of her being, but she just couldn't. As angry, betrayed, and hurt as she was by Karen, she just couldn't bring herself to hate her. Stephanie replied, “I'm tired, I'm confused, I'm scared, and I'm hurt. I'm going home, so you can meet me there if you want.”

  “I just need to go home and change clothes, and I’ll meet you there,” replied Karen.

  Stephanie drove home in a cloud of complete shock. She not only contemplated what she would say to Karen when she saw her, but also what she was going to do with her now shredded life. Her world was a house of cards which had just collapsed, and she lost her husband, her boyfriend, her best friend, her job, and she even faced the prospect of going to jail. The one person in the world who Stephanie could always turn to for help with anything was gone, and she had no idea how to face this on her own. She was falling deeper and deeper into the abyss.

  ***

  Expecting Karen to arrive at any moment, Stephanie began cleaning up some of the clutter laying around her house. She picked up the ball of clothing which had come from her car, and she placed all but the brown leather belt in a nearby laundry basket. Stephanie stared at the belt, remembering the first time she saw Derrick wearing it, and although she had regained her composure, she was still unable to fathom the depth of the lies in which she had become entangled. She was instantly pulled from her deep thought by the sound of a knock on her front door.

  She held the belt in her hand as she answered the door. She opened the door to find Karen outside, and she invited her in. Stephanie handed the belt to Karen, and greeted her with, “Here, give this to Derrick next time you see him.”

  Karen and Stephanie began talking, and the two women just rehashed the same issues which they had already battled through in their earlier conversation of text messages. It was obvious to Stephanie that Karen was coming apart at the seams, and she saw how devastated Karen was. Stephanie tried her best to console Karen, but it was just too difficult for her to be fake.

  Stephanie said, “Karen, I understand where you’re coming from, or at least I’m trying to understand. I get that you’re scared, and for that part, I guess I understand. But I want you to understand something, too -- I will never forgive you for this. No matter what you say or what you do, I will never accept you as my friend again, and I will never forgive you.”

  Karen showed Stephanie a string of text messages she had been receiving from Derrick since Stephanie confronted him. In the messages, Derrick was blaming Karen for Stephanie catching them, and he called Karen the most horrific names. The most terrifying messages, though, were the multiple texts threatening to ruin her life. The final message from Derrick to Karen read,

  “I'm going to destroy you, you stupid bitch. You and your little fucking friend,” and it mortified both of them.

  Stephanie convinced Karen that it was time to end Derrick's grip over her life. Karen decided she would call his bluff, let Derrick do as he wanted with the photos of her, and she would ultimately deal with the aftermath as it came. She wasn't going to be his slave any longer.

  The two women talked well into the night, with Karen realizing that very much like Stephanie’s, her life as she knew it was about to end.

  Stephanie ended the conversation by announcing, “I'm exhausted, Karen. I need to go take a shower and go bed.”

  “Can I stay just a
little longer?” asked Karen. “I can’t let my husband find out about this from Derrick -- I need to tell him everything when I get home tonight, myself. I need to come completely clean, and I’m just not ready to go yet.”

  “Stay as long as you want. Just lock the door when you leave,” said Stephanie as she started to walk up the stairs to the master bathroom.

  “Stephanie,” Karen called out.

  Stephanie stopped, and without looking at Karen she replied, “Yes?”

  “Please tell me you might forgive me someday. I’m about to lose everything, and I can’t lose you, too.”

  “I already told you, Karen. I’ll never forgive you for this, never. Oh, and welcome to my world,” said Stephanie before she continued up the stairs.

  Karen sat alone on the living room floor, and she started to imagine what was about to become of her life. Her mind raced with fear. She knew her co-workers and her husband would soon learn of her affair with Derrick, and she was certain Derrick would be sending them photos of her engaging in the most humiliating and degrading sex acts. She, too, would likely be losing her marriage and her career to Derrick, and facing that prospect was too much for her to handle.

  The most painful prospect for Karen, however, was the thought of looking her loving husband in the eye and telling him her dark secret. Describing the things she had done with Derrick would devastate her husband, and Karen began to lose her grip on any rational thought as she realized she just couldn’t do it.

  Karen tightly gripped Derrick's belt in her right hand with enough force to turn her knuckles white, and she climbed the stairs to Stephanie's bedroom. She heard the shower running in the adjacent bathroom as she walked through the room, and she walked into Stephanie’s closet. She used both hands to push Stephanie’s hanging clothes to the side, revealing the garment rod at the top of the closet

  Karen reached up and looped the belt through the garment rod and buckled the ends of the belt together. She stood on a storage bin and placed her head through the belt, forming a noose around her neck. She collapsed her knees, dropping her weight downward, and she hung herself in the closet. Stephanie was washing herself in the steam drenched shower, less than twenty feet away, as the spark of life quickly faded from Karen’s body.

 

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