Wounded Courage (Lucky Thirteen)

by S. M. Butler

  I refused to look at Murphy. It was embarrassing, though I supposed it shouldn’t have been. I wasn’t a nun. I had a right to seek out a relationship with other guys. He’d certainly never been interested.

  “He was my boyfriend,” I said quietly. Admitting it out loud hurt. Alex had been a wonderful new addition to my life… right up until I found out everything. Who Alex was, what he wanted from me. Alex’d been stressed, scared, and with good reason. One didn’t just go against the Giroux family, even when one was a member of it.

  “For how long?” Murphy again. My face burned and it shouldn’t have. I was a damn adult. I lifted my eyes in a defiant glare and met his straight on.

  “About a year. I moved in last December.”

  “Why?” Chris asked. They were starting to gang up on me, that same thing they’d done when we were kids. I doubted they even realized they were doing it. Some things never changed.

  “He told me that I was in danger and wanted to protect me.”

  “From who?”

  “From his family.” Silence followed that statement. Chris wrote on his notepad, line after line. He didn’t look at me. Minutes passed and he kept writing. Finally, I just couldn’t take it. “Chris? Please talk to me. I need you to talk to me.”

  Chris stopped writing and lifted his eyes to mine. “Addison, I don’t know what to say to you right now. You’re the last person I expected to see. So… all I can do is ask these questions and hope I find answers.” Just the sound of dejection in his voice forced fresh tears to the surface. But I glanced up, and Murphy was watching me. I didn’t want to cry in front of him. Not again.

  “What were you doing at Giroux’s house?”

  “I live—lived—there.” I sighed and added, “I told you. It’s complicated.”

  “I’m listening,” he said. “Because I’m really interested to know why my sister was in an arms dealer’s home, playing house with him.” His barely leashed anger made me shiver. We were twins, but we were rare in that our birthdays actually fell on different days. He’d been born fifteen minutes before me, and maybe because of that, Chris had always assumed the older brother role with me. I was the screw up of the family, the one that needed babysitting and looking after.

  “I… “ I stopped and shook my head.

  “Why were they holding you?” Holding me? Really, I hadn’t been in any danger until Marie and Rene showed up. Rene had never liked me. He’d been waiting for the perfect moment to come after me. And Marie, well, she’d hated everything since her husband was killed.

  “I told you. I wasn’t a prisoner there.”

  “Tell me again.” Chris demanded.

  “I lived there!” I screamed at him, the frustration boiling over. The words poured from my mouth. Silence followed that declaration, even though I’d already told them once. “I lived there with my boyfriend. That’s what people do when they like each other. Not that you would ever know that.”

  More silence. Chris wrote things on the legal pad in front of him. I wanted to rip that damn pad from his hands and throw it across the room.

  “What do Mom and Dad know about your absence?”

  My throat clogged with a painful lump. I’d avoided thinking of our parents. They were quite happily living their lives in Oak Creek, far from the bustle of city life. “My absence? I was in school, Chris. I just didn’t tell them that I left. They don’t know about Alex. I couldn’t tell them. He wouldn’t allow it because it wasn’t safe, that if I told them they would be targets too. I couldn’t let that happen.”

  “Did he kidnap you?”

  “No.”

  “Did he force you to leave San Diego?”

  “No.”

  “Did he get you pregnant?”

  “No! God, Chris!”

  “I’m trying to understand here!”

  “No, you’re not. You’re interrogating me!”

  He shoved the chair back and stood. Murphy stood too, as calm as ever as Chris placed his palms on the table, and leaned in toward me, his grey eyes flashing with anger. “I’m trying to figure out how my fucking sister ended up in a criminal’s home halfway across the world from where she’s supposed to be!”

  I shrunk down in my seat, and tightened my arms around myself. My ribs ached. My face throbbed. My leg pulsed with pain. My heart hurt, both from the accusations and the sudden feeling that I missed my family.

  He must have seen that in me. He froze, his eyes scanning over me. That’s when Murphy put his hand on Chris’s shoulder. “Chris, why don’t we take a break? We’re all a little emotional here.”

  The soft timbre of his voice set me at ease. Chris nodded at the man. “I know, I know.” He cleared his throat and rolled his neck. I heard a couple of pops. “Addison, are you hungry?”

  Food. Now that was something I hadn’t given thought to in hours. I couldn’t even remember the last time I’d eaten. I nodded, because I did not trust myself to speak.

  Chris pinched the bridge of his nose and then blew out a breath. “Okay. We’ll take a breather, and I’ll get you something from the mess.” He glanced at Murphy. “Why don’t you read over what I’ve got there, Murph?”

  He headed for the door. I didn’t want him to leave angry. He was still my brother, and I loved him regardless of the situation.

  “Chris?”

  He stiffened and stopped, but didn’t turn around.

  “I’m sorry I didn’t talk to you. I was so scared of you getting hurt if I did.”

  He still didn’t turn. His fists balled tightly at his sides. Without turning, he said, “You’re safe here, Addy. I promise.” Then he left, the door clanging shut behind him. I watched the door for a few seconds before I turned back to the guy he’d left in the room with me. The one who made my heart double-time and my insides turn to jelly.

  ~*~*~

  I turned to face Murphy. He sat down in the chair my brother vacated. My eyes were drawn to him as his muscles flexed, lethal grace in every movement he made. He made me hyper aware of my body. My cheeks heated, the stupid blush flooding me as he studied my face.

  He moved like a weapon, honed to perfection. But it was those piercing eyes that intimidated me the most. He glanced down at the notepad my brother had left. His eyes moved as he read, but gave no indication of the subject matter written on it.

  “How’ve you been?” I spoke first. I was always good at that. Murphy wasn’t really a talker. I was always the one who had to break the silence.

  “Good. You know, when I’m not having to rescue my best friend’s little sister.” His lip quirked upward on one side. That was as close as Murphy got to a smile.

  “He’s only older by fifteen minutes. I’m hardly his little sister. It was an ongoing argument we’d had over the years. Mostly, he just liked to tease me about it.

  “You guys have different birthdays.”

  “I was born at 12:02. That doesn’t count.”

  The corner of his mouth ticked upward in an amused smirk. God, that was sexy. So were the long eyelashes that would make any girl jealous. Every little muscle on his arms was visible, which created a longing in me that I hadn’t felt in a long time, even with Alex. So different from the scrawny boy I’d crushed on as a teenager. He was two years my senior, and at the time, the body he’d had then appealed to my young fifteen year old self.

  Shit. As he leaned against the table on his elbows, his shirt stretched across the sculpted muscles of his chest. This boy was dangerous. He didn’t move like a weapon. He had honed his body into a weapon.

  Maybe it was the idea of him being a weapon… But waves of desire washed over me, amping up with each look he gave me. How did he do that, invoke such powerful want in me? Damn it. I’d hoped to be done with that stupid teenage crush.

  “Can I ask you a question, Murphy?”

  “What?” His eyes flicked to the corner behind me. I’d almost forgotten about the cameras. I wondered how many people were behind that mirrored glass too. I had a secret to keep,
and no doubt, those people would want to know about it.

  “What is this place?”

  “I can’t answer that right now,” he said.

  Murphy was always about duty and honor. He and Chris had always wanted to be career navy. They’d always wanted to be SEALs. But this place? This didn’t look like SEAL duty. It looked like… well, spy work. Not that I knew what spy work was like. But it definitely wasn’t SEAL work. Those guys busted down doors and rescued hostages. They were the unsung heroes of the United States military. They weren’t guys known for the subtlety of espionage.

  “At least you’re honest.” Not that it was ever in question. Murphy had never lied to me.

  “Tell me about Simon Giroux. Did you ever meet him?”

  “No. Alex was very careful to keep me away from most of his family, especially Simon. No one sees Simon. Ever.” Lie. This was part of the problem, because Simon knew me, knew what I looked like, knew who my family was. If I stepped out of line, he’d have gone after them first. Simon knew just how to destroy a person the most effectively.

  Alex had wanted out, and I wanted him out. And I’d done everything I could to help Alex gwith that goal in mind. His family had been killing him, slowly, milking away his soul. That was the one good thing about him being dead. His soul was safe from his family now.

  “Yet when you found out who they were, you stayed.”

  I fought back tears. I missed him. Alex and I… well, we sucked as a couple. We’d both known that. I’d stayed because we’d become friends, and I did love him. I wanted to see him free.

  The tone in his voice wasn’t accusing, but it rang flat. I looked up at him and frowned. He was angry. With me? What right did he have to be angry with me?

  “Listen,” I said. “I have made bad choices. I own that. But you don’t just leave a Giroux, even one like Alex, who didn’t even want to be there anymore. Not if you want to survive it.” Murphy’s mouth quirked into a knowing smirk, but thankfully, he said nothing. “I didn’t even know I was stuck there… until I tried to leave.”

  There was more, but I couldn’t tell him all of it. We’d set me up as a target to draw out the betrayal in his family, but it had gone wrong. Rene had shown his hand too soon, and now Alex was dead, and I was left hanging out to dry. Supposedly, I should have been safe from attack, but we hadn’t counted on Rene’s desire to see me dead, or his willingness to kill his own brother.

  “Why don’t you tell me about that?” Murphy said.

  I gripped the locket around my neck, rubbing my thumbs over the smooth silver surface. I wasn’t sure how much to say. I hadn’t left Alex because he’d asked me not to… and then he’d locked me in his bedroom. But I was saved from having to speak again when the door clicked open.

  Chris carried a paper plate with a sandwich on it, and a plastic cup of water. He set them down. “It’s a PBJ. Made it myself.”

  My brother knew that was my favorite. I hadn’t had a good PBJ in so long. And Chris made the best. Of course, it was hard to screw up a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. He’d have really had to try. “Thanks.”

  “Eat slow. Wouldn’t want it to come back up. Doc said it’s been a while since you had food.” I nodded. The many hours I’d sat in this room, the hours as they triaged my leg and the surgery to excise the bullet. The chopper ride from Alex’s house. How long had it been anyway? A day? Two? No wonder I was exhausted.

  Chris gave me a small smile, the first since we’d been reunited, and turned to Murphy. “Let me talk to you a minute.”

  I took a bite, watching him as he pulled Murphy away to the corner of the room. The murmuring wasn’t difficult to hear, but making out the words was impossible. By the glances back at me, I assumed they were speaking about me.

  Murphy was mostly facing away from me, which gave me a nice view of his broad shoulders, and narrow hips. Like always, he had the best ass. It came from years of exercise, of running and boxing. For a while, he’d been a swimmer too.

  As I finished the sandwich, the two came back. Chris passed the cup of water to me, which I sipped on greedily but tried not to overdo. This sandwich wasn’t going to cut it. I was starving.

  Chris leaned his butt against the edge of the metal table on my side, facing me. Like Murphy, he had a sidearm too. He crossed his arms over his chest. “Okay, now. Here’s what’s going to happen. You’re still pretty bad off. You need a few days to heal, so I think you should stay here until you are feeling better.”

  “Here? In this room?” In the most uncomfortable room ever.

  “No,” he said. “We have a room prepared for you. You can get more food and we’ll get you some fresh clothes. You can go take a shower, a nap, read, watch TV, anything you want.”

  “What’s the catch?” Because since I met Alex, there was always a catch. I hadn’t seen my brother in three years, but he’d never been so gracious, or that nice to me. Something was up.

  He glanced at Murphy, and something passed between them. I wasn’t stupid. I just wanted to hear them say it. “Giroux is out there, looking for you. You go out in public, and you won’t stand a chance. He will find you.”

  That was true. Simon Giroux would never stop looking for me. Or at least, he’d never stop looking for the notebook, or the key around my neck, if he knew about either. With Alex dead, the will would make it to his residence in the mountains of Aruguay within the next week. After that, the efforts to retrieve me would triple.

  “I want to protect you, Addy. But I can’t do that if you’re not here. So I’m asking you to stay with us for a while.” Chris almost sounded sincere, but there was a quiet quality in his voice that left me suspicious.

  “You’re asking me, or you’re telling me?” A flash of anger filled my chest, pressurizing it. I wanted honesty from him, and I was going to get it one way or another. “Level with me, Chris. I’m not a child.”

  “You’re not a prisoner here. You’re my sister. But there are things in motion that you’re awfully close to and have been for at least a year now. We need to know what you know.” Chris stopped, and a level of uncertainty came over his features.

  “What exactly do you think I know?” I narrowed my eyes, suspicion slithering through like cold mud in my heart.

  “We need to know what happened to Alex Giroux, and why Rene was trying to kill you. We need to know where Simon is and we think you know.”

  “Rene killed Alex. I shot Rene for killing Alex but you guys ended him. I don’t know about Simon. I don’t even know what happened to Marie. I’m sorry, but I don’t have the information that you want from me.” They were ganging up on me, like they did when we were children, and I hated it. “Satisfied?”

  Murphy took over, his chiseled features stoic as could be. “Unfortunately, no.”

  “Fucking hell, Murphy. What do you want from me?” Frustration burned through the cold mud that had collected in my heart, pumping searing heat through my body.

  Chris shifted from one foot to the other uneasily, and then he straightened his shoulders back, lifting his chin. Murphy was the first to speak. “Until we can ascertain the level of intelligence you have on Giroux activities, and until we can guarantee that your safety is not compromised and you are not in fact currently in the employ of the Giroux family, you have been restricted to this complex.”

  Brownie points for him looking somewhat reluctant about that declaration, but I had no intention of being restricted at all.

  ~*~*~

  I sat there, staring in shock at the two men who were once boys with whom I’d played in the mud. My gaze shifted from Chris’s blank expression to Murphy’s. Neither were giving up an inkling of what they were thinking or feeling. I was not allowed to leave? Yeah, that was going to go over real well.

  “You’re not serious about this. You’re fucking arresting me?”

  “Please don’t think of it as an arrest, Addison. It’s for your own safety.” Chris’s voice was low. I glanced at Murphy, who had always been that kid
who never wanted to grow up. But he had grown up, both physically and mentally. The carefree boy who used to shove my face in the mud for a laugh had been restrained and replaced by a guy who apparently never smiled anymore. He was a damn Vulcan now.

  “My safety?” What did they know about keeping me safe from Simon Giroux? They couldn’t even comprehend the part I was playing in his world. I wasn’t sure that I could either.

  Alex was dead, Rene was dead, and Marie too… and I was stuck in the middle of his family drama with a giant target painted on my back. I couldn’t afford to stay here. The Giroux family wouldn’t kill me and risk the money I had access to, but sure as shit, their enemies would.

  “It’s not something that comes lightly, Addison.” Chris sighed. “Look, I can show you what the Giroux do.” Like I didn’t know. That was why Alex wanted out and why I was helping him. But it wasn’t just Giroux Enterprises I was afraid of. Without Alex… I didn’t have protection against his enemies either, or enemies of the family. “Just… wait here.”

  I let him leave, not because I was interested in what he had to say, but because one SEAL would be easier to break away from than two. Anger whirled around and mixed with fear inside me. I couldn’t afford to be imprisoned. I couldn’t be locked away. I couldn’t screw this up. I was tired of being that girl who couldn’t do anything right.

  “It’s not going to be forever, Addison,” Murphy said right after Chris shut the door. “We’ll fix this for you.”

  “Fix it?” I scoffed. I didn’t want this fixed. I wanted it to go away. But they’d thrown down their cards and I was just supposed to sit down and accept it. Well, I couldn’t do that, and I was limited in the time I had before Chris came back. I wasn’t sure how much I could do with a bum leg but I was determined to find out.

  I grabbed the crutch and stood, using it to support my weight and wincing through the whole thing.

  Murphy’s brow pinched tightly. “You should sit. Rest that leg.” He stood and came around the table, so he was in front of me. Slowly, I put more and more weight on my hurt leg, trying to hold in the trembling pain that forced its way through my body, covering it with fury.