Ada_The Untold Story

by Zola Tau

  "How kind of him. " Ada said genuinely. Nari rolled her eyes. " One may assume so and in no way am I pledging in defense for Princess Ki but if only her father actually allowed her chance to be with him and made her feel like he does care, she may not be as she is right now, but she too has grown too stubborn to want to help... At the same time it’s not all her doing, she’s a sickly child and tries to look outside of the matter." Nari ranted a bit before turning to the princess. "Maybe an attack from the thieves of the sea is what she needs to come to her senses. " Nari said avoiding the princess's eyes knowing she'd get glared at for saying such a thing.

  “ tsk tsk If only the king were here to hear such a thing.

  "Now I'll go about and change into something a bit less drenched, and you can get ready Princess, I'm sure the prince is awaiting your thoughts on this bath he prepared for you."

  Ada smiled and looked at Nari in a gaze of confusion, but before she could ask about the meaning of her last statement, Nari had already departed. Ada quickly washed her hair and tightly wrapped it with a ribbon after rubbing the little coconut oil she had elegantly along the roots of her hair. After doing all needed, she got out, dressed in a simple hanbok that lied next to the drying attire she previously had on then she walked out towards the room from which she came.

  "He makes nice baths for someone that seems to be spoiled, and has had everything done for him." Ada thought to herself with a smile. As her mind trailed about as she came to realized that the hanbok she currently had on was also the white hanbok he had on days earlier.

  "No wonder I couldn't tie it correctly, the owner of it is a giant, in height compared to Me." she said to herself in a whisper on her stroll back to her room.

  When she got to the room dwelling in thought about the kindness she was receiving from the Crown Prince she became even more shocked when a surprise was found in her room. On the bed sat the crown prince as if he was awaiting her return.

  "You can't even tie it right." he said referring to the hanbok in placement for a proper hello.

  "Well, it's not often I wear a prince’s hanbok." Ada said as she raised her brow.

  "Well come over here. " he said as he sat on the bed patting, beside himself. Ada walked closer, and once she arrived near him, she began looking away as he started to properly tie the hanbok. The method of how tense the Princess seemed to be, caused the prince to smile amused, at her nervousness.

  Ada walked backwards away from him. So he slowly got up to become face to face to her raising a brow he made slow motions and became entertained at how jumpy Ada became. In shock of the little room for air that was being left between them, Ada backed away faster but the crown prince did not let her go far; rather he brought her closer to himself with a gesture of his hand getting a hold of the base of her back and bringing her closer to a position where they shared breathe.

  He leaned in closer to her staring heavily at her full lips and she, though reluctantly backed up, she stared back just the same at his lips after a moment of wonder visited her mind.

  The crown prince chuckled as he reached behind her and grabbed another piece of the hanbok to tie to the piece already in hand. "Why is your face like that?" The prince asked as he was finished. Ada embarrassed lost gaze again "I ... I." while she searched for an answer the crown prince began to laugh. "You didn't think I was going to kiss you did you, by chance? " the prince asked staring heavily at Ada.

  "What?! No!" Ada said shaking her head along with her hands defensively. “ Don’t get your mind adrift into nonsense” The crown prince started lecturing. He studied, Ada’s scoff as she shook her head, all while looking towards the ground. The moment Ada grew distracted, he called out her name. “ Ada.” He mumbled.

  “ ye-“

  he leaned in and quickly gave her a kiss.

  There was a silence, and an annoyance Ada felt, which quickly transformed into a smile, which she gave while they shared a kiss, lining up her lips with his.

  The kiss went on, while the both seemed to grip one another closer. After a while Ada broke the kiss, and softly pushed back on the prince’s chest. “ Do I look that easy to you?” she asked him. While she frowned and wiped her lips. She didn’t do so because she felt wronged rather it was because she felt the spark she was desperately trying to avoid.

  " I hate you I hate you, I hate you " she repeated several times, but still he grabbed her closer and left kisses on her forehead, as his hands wrapped around her tightly. He made the words of hate, that she so desperately let out, sound empty, not because he was a man of magic but rather because he just brought out the truth in her.

  "I know" he whispered back with a chuckle at her reaction, a response he didn't question because even he understood why it was being said. Only when he said the words "I know" did Ada stop, looking away. She looked up as their eyes met "I shouldn't have compassion for you, there is no sense in this course to be set." Ada whispered. " Why? Because you're a criminal?" the Crown Prince teased. Ada nodded her head and didn't respond.

  "You're telling me, you're a criminal, and how’d I find myself leaving kisses on a criminal?" The prince replied back with a smile, taking her words for humor. Ada rolled her eyes and got herself out of his grip as much as she never really wanted to, depart from his presence. " She did so and walked towards the door, while pointing at it.

  "I believe we both made a mistake tonight prince, we are both merely two broken people in want for some kind of attention. " Ada said with a sense of regret in her tone.

  [제 10장]

  “ To love is to hurt, to hurt is to worry, to worry is to feel. To feel is to smile, to love is to worry about those who feel hurt, in hope to see them smile. ”

  "I was only teasing.” he said as he walked towards her. " I know you were, I know Prince. I know that you were simply teasing but even so, that..." Ada sighed as she looked into the eyes of the prince.

  "That doesn't change the fact that it's true, and even if that were wrong the other still stands correct, and that is that we are just two broken people, rather I am the broken one and I will not allow myself to become fixed by terms of being with you, I can't allow that to happen. " Ada replied back in a hectic response. "You are the son and a leader to a land that caused me too much pain...too much pain to just set aside...and...And to forget that this isn't where I belong. It all would be too much to address later on. It was great painting murals mentally of even being beside you but for it to be a reality would be the ultimate crime. I will not allow myself to be that person, who creates more challenges for themselves when there is already an abundance amount yet to be fixed. "

  The Crown Prince stared at Ada listening as she recreated a list of reasons, one based off the other about why they couldn't be. What he consistently failed to understand was that there was a fear in anyone who realizes that they found themselves in the midst, rather on a road they continually tried to avoid, whether is it was an attraction to someone they shouldn't be attracted to by rule of a social contract.

  In that situation, the attraction becomes a roadblock in a path that was already filled with uncertainty. Ada stood outside near the doorpost with her hands folded and the prince stood behind her. "I guess it makes sense what you say because I couldn't make you my wife, anyhow." he finally said awaiting her reaction which he didn't receive. He said those words, with every purpose possible for the sake of her expressing some kind of hurt. Yet she stayed neutral in reaction, as if what he said meant nothing to her.

  "Not that I wouldn't one day love to but traditi—." Before he could finish, Ada nodded her head, though she was offended at what she heard she ignored it.

  "I wonder if father made it home yet?" she asked at random distracting from the conversation, the question more directed toward the universe then the young man behind her. She chose to bring up her father, to heed warming to both she and the prince.

  "Ada..." The prince rushed to say to try and return to the situation at hand.

  " I believe it
is best if we pretend that it never occurred, there are many promising women of the court and daughters of rich kings you could choose from, don't allow my existence to sway your judgment. Even a prince is allowed a mistake; think of it as tension build by the situation, seeing me helpless, made you mistake pity for attraction." At that Ada turned around to come face to face with the prince heavily breathing.

  " That, there is your flaw Princess, you mistake the size of a problem originally the size of a stream, for a river and rather than step over it, you stand and stare until it expands and swallows your whole " the Prince said, holding in anger.

  "You may be right, that is my flaw, but what does it say of me. A woman of title to lay down my dignity for a man who resides in a place that caused all the problems I bag. I've lost my father, but I will not lose my dignity along with it! I will not give myself to you, and stay by your side and yet never be seen as a full woman. They barely see me as a full woman now, and I have a title! It may not seem like big deal to you, but to me, I am beyond suffocated with the actions taken by this land, in any situation regarding me. When I first arrived, it took many moon and sun rises before I grew accustomed to the rules, only to say farewell to my father the moment I assumed I got the handle on any of it, and then to be told I made a village sick with my presence alone. I can not risk the troubles that would follow if anyone even assumed we were together; I would become a target by all." Ada finished, with that, she shoved her way past the prince and went to bed closing the door in the Prince's face, once he was outside.

  The flustered prince found himself walking away towards the bridge to think unsure how to overcome Ada's reaction. As unfair as it seemed she made sense in her objections.

  "A lover's quarrel?" a voice asked behind him in the night. Turning around there sat Nari under the blossom tree looking towards the sky. "She's hard-headed." the prince added as he walked over to her to sit down.

  "Wasn't it you that said she would never be the kind of woman you found interest in? You recited that every day when your eldest brother asked, and even to her face, you've said this, Prince." Nari reminded him.

  “ Wow, she really let’s her servants in on all her secrets to tell, does she not have any friends?” the Crown prince asked sarcastically, as a method to belittle the words he heard.

  Nari stood up to walk away, after a quick bow when the crown prince began to speak again, causing her to sit back down.

  "Things change when you see that you're doing all these different things for that person you once wanted to leave, it is a control that person keeps over you without even trying. It's not love, at this point but maybe it's the curiosity that it may become love that intrigues me." The prince replied.

  Nari fell silence to his words and just examined the prince as he was staring up at the stars. It must be hard being in a position like that, unable to fall attracted towards anyone other than the one chosen for you, people envy the Royals, but what a lonely life it must be, not marrying for love, but power.

  People tend to believe that love is a display of weakness when rather really, if that may be true then the only thing weaker than love is power. Power had a way of shriveling up a person to a point where one could no longer determine whether if it's them that have power over the advantage they crave or if it's power that rules over them.

  All she could manage to think was "Poor Prince" ironic, isn't it? One could have all the riches in the world but still be more of a needy beggar than a real beggar themselves.

  The Prince excused himself for the night dragging his feet to his bed.

  The following morning, the two saw one another, yet they walked right past one another as if, the other did not exist. They had opened the gates to an awkwardness that was released through means of prideful emotions,

  Sixty days passed and still, the prince and Ada acted as if though, they never knew one another since they shared a kiss. As childish as they were being, they did what each assumed was best for their kingdom rather than to focus their loneliness. Ada consistently reminded herself it was not long till she'd be called home, the Queen becoming sick, and her daughters chance of finding a path to the throne was slimmer than ever before.

  Advisors awaited the return of their king's daughter to find a ruler to place by her side the moment she returns to the soil of her homeland.

  Ada, day by day till her ship would come just sat underneath the blossom tree practicing her Hangul writing, as high as her speech was it could only become stronger once she could write it correctly, and she dedicated herself to do so. As naive as she seemed she craved the want to learn and expand, or rather, in short, it was a method she was using to master the art of forgetting what she told herself to, often.

  She and the prince's kiss became a dream rather than a memory like she'd wish, that way there was a reason to act as if it hadn't yet to occur.

  For a while in that time the prince had been called to the king frequently, curiously Ada would ask Nari who informed her that the prince was to meet his fiancée soon, a young woman who would be coming in, in five days, and night’s time.

  As hard as she tried it tugged at her mentally and physically but she kept it silent acting as strong as she could. On the day she met the prince's fiancé was the day she placed on her weakest act. She walked into the palace for her lunch with the king, which they had decided on since Princess Ki was away. Ada and the King were sharing a laugh when a young woman arrived with someone who seemed to be her father beside her.

  The young woman was lovely to anyone's eyes, her long dark hair and glowing fair skin, soft rosy cheeks and a flattering figure. From what was later found out she was the daughter of the most prestigious general throughout all of Gojoseon: who was beside her. "Isn't she lovely?" The king asked Ada.

  With a sip of her drink, Ada nodded and bowed to greet the young woman. The King introduced Ada as a royal guest, and so both the young woman and her father bowed, shaking her hands as a way to let them know that they didn't need to and with a smile, Ada asked that they not.

  The young woman was shy, but friendly in her attempt to speak though it was obvious she was as unsure as could be. He's not his type Ada said to herself, but then again why should it matter? It wasn't as if I would know that kind of thing. She thought all she could to herself, silently as she smiled and nodded her head, as the King spoke. Too preoccupied to genuinely listen.

  After a few exchanges of formal greetings, Ada found her way out towards the door and her room. On the way there she walked looking to the ground in the midst of trying once again to convince herself that the sight she saw, which made her uneasy wasn't truly uncomfortable.

  With the heavens out for her defeat they had it be so that the minute she looked up, she was in a shock because, in front of her, she met the eyes of the crown prince.

  He looked at her sternly, bowed, and Ada nodded back at him. At that moment she felt regret at her words she once said to the prince because he walked past her unmoved as if she was not even there. As she had done to him that morning after they shared a kiss. When she looked back to see him hand and hand with his fiancé, she didn't think it would pain as much as it did, until she saw it with her own eyes, but what can you do when life isn't in your favor by fault of your own, there is no one to blame but yourself.

  "Loving the prince is like loving a star, no, like the sun. It's a dramatic comparison, isn't it? But even so, it's one I see fits best. We are both in the same horizon but still, he's so far away from me, what's the point I might as well go home now while it hurts less." Ada huffed about early morning.

  Nari close behind her, just agreed to everything princess Ada said as a servant should, tired out with the conversation of love from both the indecisive princess and her stubborn prince.

  Turning her head around quickly Ada faced her servant "You're so fast to voice your opinions at all other moments when I don't want to hear it but when I need it most you just agree." she went on like a child towards her servant.


  Nari just observed the lost woman and asked. "Why is it that you've grown to talk to one another less, yet you speak as if it is love?" she asked, Ada stopped suddenly and thought for awhile.

  " I guess the further we are apart the more I realize I want nothing more than to be by his side, maybe it's not actual love; just a want for something I can't have." she said walking towards the roses, she stood and stared at the rose taking in the color and all that decorated it.

  In doing so she soon found herself smiling as she was looking at a wilted rose with its petals dried out and wrinkled, while the surrounding roses were full of life. Silent for only a little while longer she began to speak on her observation.

  " I'm sure you think I'm unable to think properly because of what I just said, or maybe you ask yourself why I'm being so naive, maybe illogical even, I know of many who laugh at me, walking about day by day an African girl in a country of those that don't even look like her, some may even ask as to why I'm not gone yet, I’m sure many would wonder how could I be attracted to a man of a country that brought me my worst nightmare, and death to my father. Or maybe you pity me, and blame my situation for my specious emotions, but do you know why I do what I do?" Ada asked turning around to face Nari.

  "Why is that?" Nari asked as a reply intrigued by the princess's poetic choice of words. With a soft smile and a look down at the dead rose Ada softly said: "I don't know either" she picked up the stagnant flower and closely examined it.

  " The more I think about it I still can't understand it, I can succeed without a man, many others in my land find me beautiful, I know I am in a sense, but why I keep closing my eyes to replay a kiss I've desperately advised him to forget I don't know, maybe it's the idea that he was there for me most when my father was gone, he assumed I didn't know but I saw his shadow every so often when night would come opening the door to leave some food.” Ada turned to Nari, then continued: “ and taking it away by dinner time, to replace it with a midday meal knowing I wouldn't eat because consistently all he received back were full trays, but I know he did it in hopes that I may. Or maybe it's the way he didn't fake honor towards me, the idea that only for a while we couldn't stand one another, but soon it became a part of our unplanned friendship, maybe I'll find the answer one day, but as of now they are all just theories aren't they Nari ?" She said as she took the dead flower and tucked it back into the midst of the living.