"Emily, please come back to my house. I’ll take care of you."
"I have to go back to Zainab. I promised I wouldn’t leave her alone."
"Then I’ll drive you back. Come on."
~~~
Mitch got down in time to see Emily collapse on the bench and into the man’s arms. He watched her walk away with him a minute later as if he were watching his life leave without him.
CHAPTER 45
Emily did not have the books for her classes. She went to the library, taking notes off of the copies of the textbooks she couldn’t afford. She read fast, but she was worried that one day someone else was going to have a book when she needed it. So she worked even faster.
She didn’t stay late. She made sure that she was around to take Zainab home. Zainab never asked her to, but Emily knew she didn’t want to be alone. She worked through the few books that she could check out of the library. It was comforting to work while she made sure Zainab slept through the night.
A few weeks into the Spring Quarter, Zainab finally agreed to get counseling at the Health Center. Emily made the appointments and walked Zainab to the center on those days.
On one such day, she was standing in front of the building after Zainab had gone in. She felt a gentle tap on her shoulder and turned around. "Professor Hazlett!"
"Emily! How have you been?"
Emily hadn’t meant to, but she started crying. She came up for air long enough to mention not having money for books and her best friend being drugged and attacked, then cried again. Professor Hazlett put her arm around her and hugged her as she cried.
After she’d wiped Emily's eyes, Professor Hazlett took her to the Faculty Center, bought her lunch and made her tell her the whole story from the beginning. She nodded when Emily was done. Emily was ashamed to have someone she respected see her like this, but she couldn’t pretend any longer.
"I’m so sorry," Professor Hazlett said. "I had no idea you’d date him."
"Why?"
"Because he’s boring. There is nothing worse than the student who thinks he knows everything, because then he refuses to believe he has anything to learn. You ask questions. Good ones."
"I loved your class," Emily said shyly. "You should have seen me when I was ten. I was obsessed with Greek and Roman and even Norse mythology. When you brought out all of the mythological references of the Renaissance plays-" She knew how foolish she must have sounded, but she didn't care. "I could have taken your class all year."
Professor Hazlett pulled her chin back. "So... you don’t have money for books? I wish I could say that’s the first time I heard this but at least you found something out of the library. And you’re graduating this quarter?"
"If I don’t fail out of my classes I will."
"Mm hmm." She thought for a moment. "Can you come to my office tomorrow at one?"
"I have a class then."
Professor Hazlett smiled. "I don’t think that will be a problem."
Dutifully, Emily showed up at twelve-forty-five the next day. Professor Hazlett opened the door with a smile. "I think I have the answer to both of our problems."
Emily had never had a fairy godmother before. But there Professor Hazlett was, waving her wand and making her problems disappear. She needed a research assistant, but as a fluke, none of the graduate pool had chosen her class. So she had leeway to hire an undergraduate, and the funding was such that she could choose from a wide array of students, not just those eligible for work-study.
Emily grinned. "So then it doesn’t matter that I don’t qualify for work study or any need-based aid?"
"Congratulations, my dear. No FAFSA required for this position."
"So this isn’t a university job?"
"It’s a quasi-university job. You’ll be doing work for me, and I’m doing it for the university."
"Who’s funding the position?"
Professor Hazlett’s face changed. "Someone who owes me something."
"Is it some kind of cigarette company?" Emily held her breath as she waited for the answer.
The older woman laughed. "No, nothing like that."
The pay for twenty hours of research per week popped Emily’s eyes out.
It got better. Professor Hazlett’s research on the myth of Persephone was behind, so she needed to begin work immediately and her assistant needed a flexible schedule to accommodate the overtime. As such, she was able to arrange that Emily drop all her current classes and substitute them with Independent Studies in those departments.
This might have been a dream come true, only Emily hadn’t dared dream it.
She smiled for the first time in weeks. "Thank you so much! But why are you doing this for me?"
"You're not the first brilliant young person who needed a hand, but you're the first one I can give it to." She patted her shoulder. "Hopefully you’ll be able to give someone a hand later on yourself."
"You won’t regret this."
"I know. Now get out of here and do something fun before you start work tomorrow."
Emily felt as if she were floating on air. She was figuring out what to do to celebrate when Richard called.
"What are you doing tonight?" Emily asked.
"Uh, not sure. What are you doing tonight?"
"Celebrating! I’ve got a job!" She told him the whole story very fast.
"That’s great!" he said when she was done. "Sure, let’s celebrate. But, sorry, did you say Joanna Hazlett?"
"I think I just said Hazlett. Do you know her?"
"I think I’ve taken a class with her, maybe when I was a freshman, before time began. Yes, of course I’ll celebrate with you. What should we do?"
"Well, I’m going to call Zainab and see if she’ll be happy enough about this that she’ll come out with us. Otherwise, I guess I’m cooking dinner at our place."
"You're cooking? Why didn’t you say so?"
Emily tracked Zainab down and waited for her outside of class. "I’ve got a job!" she shrieked as soon as Zainab walked out. The two of them hugged and jumped up and down. "And we’re celebrating tonight."
"Of course, whatever you want to do." Zainab was trying to be brave, but Emily wouldn’t force her out if she wasn’t ready.
"How about we just meet Richard at Whole Foods, and then drive back to our place?"
"I finally get to meet the Richard? Let’s do it!"
Emily and Zainab were in the pasta aisle, bickering about tomato sauce when Richard found them at six. "Emily, do you have to argue about everything?"
"Only when I’m in a good mood." She gave Richard a hug then introduced him to Zainab. Zainab’s eyes widened a little bit when she saw him, and Emily thought she blushed. Emily started to giggle, but then saw that Richard was holding her hand just a bit longer than he needed to. Emily looked down at the ground, not sure if she needed to say anything.
"So you’re Richard."
"Excuse me? I mean, yes, I’m Richard. And you must be Zainab."
"That is what Emily said just now."
"She did? Right." He was still holding her hand. Emily looked up at the cans on the top shelf. They didn’t notice.
"Wow, you know what? I can’t handle this pasta decision. You guys take care of it, just make sure it doesn’t have any meat and that it’s not spaghetti. I’m gonna go get some salad fixings. Yep, that’s what I’m gonna do."
Emily sped off. This was the best day of her life.
Dinner was moved to Richard’s house. As far as Emily was concerned, she might as well not have been there for all the conversation she participated in. After everyone ate, she cleared the table and called Jessie from the kitchen. "Sorry, dude. I think Richard has found someone to replace me."
"No way! Who?"
"Zainab."
"Is that a good idea?"
Emily peaked at them through the crack in the door. Richard was more animated than she’d ever seen him, and Zainab was laughing. Finally. "Yeah, it’s a great idea."
It was ten-thirt
y before they both heard Emily’s loud, exaggerated yawn. They talked in the car the whole way home while Emily looked out the window, trying not to listen to them.
"So we can have lunch tomorrow?" Richard asked Zainab as they parked.
"Sure. Call me and tell me where."
Emily looked off to the side. "Um, good night," she said as she got out of the car.
Zainab walked into the apartment fifteen minutes later. She was grinning from ear to ear. Yep, best day of Emily’s life.
CHAPTER 46
The next few weeks got better and better. She wasn’t able to pay Zainab too much in rent, but Emily more than made up for it with cleaning and cooking. In the month that she’d been there, Emily had scrubbed every inch of the apartment. Even better, she was happy to use her skills in the kitchen. After spending so long being relegated to beans and rice and Drew’s yucky spaghetti, she was excited to finally have the money to buy slightly more expensive ingredients and have a little fun in the kitchen. So she was horrified to realize that dairy did not agree with her anymore. In fact, it came close to making her violently ill. Eggs weren’t much better. After getting the same result day after day, she finally bit the bullet and bought a vegan cookbook, which introduced her to the wonderful world of seitan and advanced tofu wizardry. She felt not only better but creative and clever. Zainab thought her vegan fare was delicious, as did Richard, who found reasons to drop by, particularly around dinner time or even breakfast on the weekend. That was fine with Emily, although she wondered if she was ever going to have a conversation with either of them again.
Try as she might, Emily couldn’t make Zainab’s couch work. Finally, she broke down and made her way to the Korean store in Brookline to buy a Korean bed. (Richard and Zainab were happy to tag along when she explained that she was also going to buy some groceries.) Ah- much better. But because her back was still a little twitchy, she treated herself to two exercise DVDs, one for yoga and one for Pilates. After two weeks, she felt fit, toned, and finally in control of her life. Just as it should be.
All of it was made possible by the job she loved. Every morning she and Zainab would get off at Copley and walk to school for fifteen minutes. Then they’d part company in the quad, Zainab heading off to class or, occasionally, the Student Center if Richard was there with his Solar Car team, and Emily to the library. Most days she was able to use one of the grad student rooms. There she could note and research the myth of Persephone and all of its variations and origins to her heart’s content. When the work for the day was done, she would then move onto one of her independent assignments, which was more of the same as far as the amount of research and writing. It was possibly more work than she had ever done in her life, but she loved every minute of it. She’d break to eat lunch or, a few times a week, meet with one of the professors overseeing her independent studies, but mostly she had to be dragged out of the library at seven by Richard and/or Zainab. Though Richard always offered her a ride home, most of the time she begged off for the exercise, leaving Zainab Richard’s sole passenger. Damned if Emily didn’t usually beat Zainab home by almost an hour.
~~~
Emily loved the idea of Zainab and Richard. Every time she saw them holding hands or kissing, she turned away- she didn’t want them to see her goofy smile. It was nice to see something good.
But... there were times when she could not forget that day. She’d told Richard everything. So Richard knew. Did Zainab know he knew? Did she tell him?
What really concerned her... well, if Richard knew, he’d be a nice guy, wouldn’t he? Because he was Jessie’s cousin and Miranda’s friend- he was her friend- he wouldn’t do anything he shouldn’t, right?
Right?
Of course it wasn’t Emily’s business. Zainab was a big girl. Wasn’t it condescending that she should worry like that? Shouldn’t Zainab be allowed to make her own decisions? Wasn’t worrying acting like it was Zainab’s fault?
To Hell with it, she thought as she sent Richard the text.
Emily had a latte ready for him when he arrived at the café. He smiled. "Cheers! And to what do I owe the pleasure?"
"It’s been a while since we talked. Alone."
Richard nodded as he sipped the latte. "What did you want to talk about?"
"Nothing…in particular. I just wanted to make sure... that everything was okay."
He put his drink down. "Was there something you wanted to say to me?"
"Well... yes. I think. I just wanted to know, um, how things were with you and Zainab."
"Things?"
"Uh huh." She smiled widely. "Things. In general."
"I’m pretty fond of her."
"Of course. Because she’s so wonderful."
"Mm hmm."
"And you’re wonderful. Because you care so much. About everyone. And you try to do the right thing."
"And the right thing in this case would be...?"
"Oh, I don’t know. You know, the nice guy thing."
Richard nodded. Emily was pretty sure he was trying not to laugh. "And do you want to make sure that I’m being a, um, nice guy?"
A bunch of images of Zainab and Richard flashed through her mind. She shook her head to make them go away. "Ugh. No. I mean, yes. I mean, I know you’re a nice guy. I just want to make sure- that- you, um..."
"That I what?"
"Oh, Jesus. I think you know what I’m trying to say."
"Is there a reason you don’t want to say it?"
"Are you trying to get me to say that it’s none of my business?"
"Is it?"
"It sort of is." He leaned back and she leaned forward. "She’s my best friend."
"I know."
"And I don’t want to see anything happen to her."
"I haven’t forgotten anything."
She looked away. "Great."
"And she told me."
She closed her eyes and exhaled. "Good." But. "What did you tell her?"
"She knows I knew. She figured you must have told me before we met."
Emily bit her lip. "She’s not mad?"
"Of course not."
Of course she wouldn’t be. "What else did you tell her?"
"I didn’t tell her anything that might endanger her."
She sighed. "Thank you. I don’t want her to take on anymore than she already did."
He leaned in and patted her head. "Me neither." He picked up his latte. "So was that all?"
She laughed. "No. I’ve been dying to ask you why you’re not pursuing hybrid instead of solar."
He shook his head. "Do we want to stop using oil or not?"
~~~
A few days later Emily was walking through the quad on her lunch break and heard someone say her name. She turned around and saw Miranda. "It is you!" Miranda exclaimed as she hugged Emily.
Emily hugged her back. "I didn’t know you went to school here."
Miranda grinned. "I’m just back from ‘co-op’, which was really just an excuse to visit Israel. What have you been up to?"
"You mean Jessie and Richard didn’t tell you everything?"
"Richard never says anything unless you ask him really specific questions, and Jessie exaggerates all the time."
"In this case, if she said I was an idiot, she was right."
"If you were with the guy I think you were with, you weren’t the first one he snowed. Sophie and I were best friends for a couple of years before that. But then-"
"Michael ruined it."
"How did you know that?"
"Richard. And it’s also a good guess."
"I think we were both hoping we could reconnect with her here, but then she was with Drew."
"I hope you guys reached out to her afterward." Emily couldn’t stand the thought that someone had been with Drew and didn’t have someone there to catch her afterward.
Miranda shrugged. "I tried, but I think being with Drew made her even more spooked about... everything."
"I’m so sorry. Losing a friend is much
worse than losing a boyfriend."
Miranda sighed. "Enough about that. What’s this about Richard and your friend Zainab? That can’t possibly be true."
Emily laughed. "Oh, it’s true. They’ve been inseparable for about three weeks now."
Miranda put her hand on her heart. "Who’d have thought Richard would fall in love at first sight?"
"It’s nice to know that exists."
"Never happened to you?"
"It sort of did, but I didn’t even get to the week mark, much less three weeks." She thought about the last time she saw Mitch and pushed away any regret. "It’s better that way. He wasn’t what I thought he was."
"So why bring him up?"
"Because I thought he was everything I’d ever wanted. If nothing else, Mitchell Graham talks a really good game. Best part of his schtick is that he makes it looks like he means it."
Miranda blinked. "Oh my God, you’re Emily."
Emily blinked, looked to the side, then raised her eyebrows. "Thank you... for noticing. I thought we had that established at Christmas, but I guess it’s sort of a common name-"
"No! You’re Emily. You’re Mitch’s Emily."
She stopped breathing. "How do you know him?"
"The Hillel." Miranda smiled. "And the Student Center. Wherever he’s been when he needed to cry over you."
She knew she was blushing. "Next time you see him, tell him not to bother."
"Well, not exactly crying- male pride thing- but he’s been pretty miserable."
"Yes," Emily nodded. "He is miserable."
"Oh no, don’t say that!" Miranda said quickly. "I know he was a jerk with that Kyra person, but he knew it was a mistake even then. He just-"
"Couldn’t help himself because she was some kind of sex goddess, right?"
"What? No! I mean, I never met her, but that wasn’t what was going on."
The best way to keep from crying right then was to smirk. "I’m sure that never went on. Ever."
"That isn’t what I meant-"
The Smartest Girl in the Room Page 20