Redemption (The Reckless Rockwoods Book 4)

by Monica Burns

  “Since you have no wish to partake of any refreshment, I can only presume you’ve come to inform me that intend to seek a divorce.” Arianna was relieved to hear her voice didn’t waver as she spoke.

  The last thing she wanted to reveal was how devastating his rejection was. She’d lied to him not because she didn’t love him, but because she’d been terrified of losing him. Blake uttered an oath beneath his breath. The indecision on his face startled her. Blake had never shown anything but confidence in everything he did. Resolve replaced his hesitation as he clasped his hands behind his back.

  “No, that’s not why I’m here. I’ve come to take you home.”

  Arianna’s heart skipped a beat at his words. He’d come for her. In the next instant her heart sank. He’d not uttered one word of love or forgiveness. Simply that he’d come to take her home. The realization made the hole in her chest expand. She could never go back to Sherrington House without his love, his forgiveness—or Lucy. She shook her head.

  “I’m quite happy here in my aunt’s house.”

  Despite the soft, evenly spoken reply she knew it was a lie. She was miserable except for the time she spent with Lucy. Even then her time with her daughter was bittersweet. The frustration on Blake’s face became a scowl of anger.

  “I don’t give a damn if you’re happy or not,” he bit out fiercely. “You’ll pack your things and come home with me today.”

  “I beg your pardon,” she stared at him with a growing sense of alarm as Ruckley’s features filled her head.

  For years she had been forced to obey Ruckley’s orders to do one vile thing after another. Blake had never commanded her to do anything except when they were intimate. Those commands had been given solely to enhance her pleasure. Not once since they’d met had her husband ever done anything to make her feel as if she was a possession. Until now. A small flutter touched her stomach and a terrible fear swept through her. He’d come for her because she might be carrying his son. Blake was within his rights to take their child away from her, and a tremor rocked through her at the seriousness of her predicament. The horror of losing the baby made it almost impossible to breathe. Just as she had with Ruckley she was trapped with no means of escape.

  “Damn it, I didn’t mean it like that.”

  “Then what did you mean?” At her cold reply, he grimaced.

  “I meant that Sherrington House is empty without you.”

  “I’m curious as to how you have reached that conclusion since you no longer reside there, but at your club.” It was impossible to suppress the bitterness in her voice and a look of what might have been pain crossed Blake’s face.

  “I deserved that,” he muttered.

  There was almost a boyish, forlorn quality to his demeanor as he met her gaze. The impulse to run to him tugged at her, but she resisted. It would be a mistake to do so. Without forgiveness, whatever love he still felt for her would eventually become tainted. Losing his love that way would be far more painful than losing him now. Silence stretched out between them like an invisible chasm. It was a divide so wide she doubted it could ever be bridged. When she didn’t reply to his remark, Blake shoved his fingers through his hair creating a disheveled look that only increased her desire to fling herself forward and into his arms

  “I’m asking you to come home, Arianna.”

  Still no words of love or forgiveness, but it was impossible to keep hope from streaking through her blood. Would he have asked her to come home if he didn’t care? She pressed one hand against her stomach as the new life growing inside her fluttered again. She experienced another bout of nausea as she realized his only concern might be her child. It would explain why he’d not said he loved her.

  “I’m sorry, Blake. I cannot do–”

  “Why the hell not?” he snarled. “Are you saying you lied to me when you proclaimed your love for me?”

  “No. I do love you,” she cried out. “I cannot possibly expect you to understand how—”

  “Understand that you have a daughter?” He glared at her. “There’s nothing to understand. You lied to me.”

  “A lie you seem unwilling to forgive.” The quiet reply made him grow still as he met her gaze.

  “It’s not the lie I find difficult to forgive, Arianna. It’s your lack of faith and trust in me.” An emotion she could only label as pain flickered in his moss green eyes.

  “I lied because I thought you would cast me aside as my father did,” she said with an anguished cry. “You cannot possibly imagine what a betrayal such as that does to a person.”

  The stunned look on Blake’s face made her turn her head away from him. She refused to accept his pity. All she wanted was for him to understand her reason for lying to him. She needed him to know that it had been her fear of losing him that had driven her to hide the truth. She looked at him again. Blake’s features were unreadable, and she realized she might never be able to make him understand. She released a small sound of despair as her gaze met his as she straightened upright.

  “Can you deny you would not have had second thoughts if you’d known about Lucy before we were married? Would you have even offered for me if you’d known?” She indicated her belief he would not have done so with a shake of her head. “It is one thing to accept the fact that your wife is a whore. You can hide such a fact from people, but you cannot hide or explain away my daughter’s presence.”

  With a blinding speed that startled Arianna, Blake moved forward and shoved aside the chair between them. His hands gripped her arms as he shook her with a restrained force.

  “You are not a whore. What that bastard did to you was abominable, but it does not make you a whore. As for your father if he were alive, I’d thrash him and leave him for dead,” he said harshly. He released her and took a step backward. “I’ll not deny I might have had second thoughts if you had told me about your daughter. But in the end my decision to marry you would still have been the same. I don’t care about your past. I never have because I love you. Nothing will ever change that.”

  There was a raw, powerful force in his voice that made Arianna stare at him in astonishment. The fierce intensity of his words was reflected in his harsh expression. As she met his gaze she thought she saw fear flashed in his eyes.

  “Christ Jesus, Arianna. Say something.”

  “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Blake,” she whispered as she burst into tears. In less than a second, she was in his arms as he pulled her into his tight embrace. The familiar warmth of him engulfed her as she buried her face in his shoulder and sobbed. Blake murmured words of love, reassurance, and forgiveness as he held her close. After several moments, her sobs quieted and Blake tipped her head up with his forefinger.

  “I was a brute, my love. I should have realized you would have good reason to hide the truth from me.”

  “I’m truly sorry, Blake,” she whispered as she gulped back a fresh round of tears. “You never gave me any reason to doubt your love. I should have trusted you.”

  “Enough apologies, Arianna,” he said huskily. “All I want to hear is that you love me, and that you believe me when I say I’ll never betray you.”

  “I love you, Blake. I love you more than you will ever know.”

  “And do you trust me not to betray you?” The soft question made Arianna stiffen. As she looked into his green eyes, she struggled to say the words she knew he wanted to hear. Her mouth moved as she tried to answer, but the words failed to roll off her tongue. He winced before he bent his head and pressed his lips to her brow.

  “It’s all right, my darling. I’ll simply have to work harder to make you believe I’d never do anything to harm you.”

  He kissed her forehead again and pulled her close. As her cheek pressed into his shoulder, she experienced a new sense of security. He’d forgiven her and he loved her. There was only one thing more she could ask of him. It was the one thing that would test their newfound understanding. She pushed away from him slightly and met his gaze. Before she could
even speak, his fingers pressed against her lips.

  “It seems we now have a dilemma on our hands,” he said with a wry smile. “What to say when we bring our daughter home with us.”

  Arianna stared at him in open- wonder. Without any pleading from her, he was giving her the ultimate gift. He was willing to take in a child that wasn’t his into his home simply because he loved her. The gesture illustrated the depth of love for her. She continued to stare at him in open-mouthed wonder. Blake shook his head and kissed her gently.

  “Clearly I have my work cut out for me when it comes to proving how much I love you, my lady.”

  “You would do this for me? You would take Lucy into your home knowing the truth?”

  “Our home, my love. How could I not take the child in? I love you,” Blake said softly. “The child is innocent, and I’ll do my best to be a good father to her.”

  Unable to speak in the face of his unbelievably generous decision another round of tears streamed down Arianna’s cheeks. Concern darkened Blake’s features and he caught her face in his hands.

  “Why are you crying, sweetheart?”

  “Because I love you, and I can go home now. I’ve missed you so much.”

  “Then let’s go home, Arianna. Let’s take our daughter and go home.”

  The words whispered across her senses as Blake kissed her. Gentle and tender, the caress healed a small piece of her heart. In Blake’s arms she was safe. She was loved. She was finally home.

  § § §

  “Miss Rhea, Miss Rhea.”

  The excitement in Ginny’s voice made Rhea look up from the sock she was darning. Nine years of age, the girl was already showing signs she’d be a great beauty. Dark auburn hair and soft green eyes, Ginny had always reminded Rhea of a woodland fairy. The child raced to Rhea’s side and grabbed her by the arm.

  “There’s a lady come to call, Miss Rhea. She has the prettiest hat with a veil and everything.” Ginny’s excited description of the unexpected guest made Rhea laugh.

  “I think you’ll be a milliner one day with your love of hats.”

  Rhea set aside Vincent’s sock making note to buy him more on her next trip to the village. The boy’s feet were growing so fast she hardly had time to repair one hole before his toes pushed through the wool socks to create another one. With Ginny’s hand in hers, she allowed the child to lead her out of the dining room where she’d been working. As they entered the Hall, cook appeared just a few feet outside the kitchen.

  “Vincent and Rufus came charging into the kitchen with news of a guest, miss. Should I put a kettle of tea on?”

  “That would be lovely, Mrs. Turner. Even if our guest refuses tea, I would love a cup.”

  With a nod of understanding, the cook disappeared into the kitchen as Ginny tugged on her hand. A small laugh escaped Rhea as she allowed the girl to guide her to Green Hill House’s generously-sized parlor. Their female visitor was studying the portrait of Alfred Fremont that hung over the fireplace mantle. There was something familiar about the woman, and Rhea stiffened as her guest turned to face her.

  Even through the thick black netting that covered her face, Rhea recognized Lady Patience. The first thought that flitted through her mind was that something had happened to Percy. She immediately dismissed the thought. Lady Patience’s clothing was a bright shade of brilliant yellow, definitely not a mourning dress. Gently touching Ginny’s shoulder, Rhea bent her head to catch the child’s attention.

  “Sweetheart, would you please go help Mrs. Turner. You may ask her to put the sugar cookies you like on the tray.”

  “Yes, Miss Rhea” There was a distinct look of disappointment on the girl’s face that reflected she had been hoping to stay in the room. But she obeyed Rhea’s dictates and left the room. When the child had left the parlor, Rhea turned to face her visitor. Lady Patience rolled up her veil to eye Rhea with a look of assessment.

  “Forgive my unexpected visit, Miss Bennett, since Melton Park was so close to you I thought I would pay you a brief call.”

  “That’s very kind of you,” Rhea said quietly then gestured to one of the room’s Queen Anne armchairs her aunt was so fond of. “Won’t you sit down? I’ve instructed our cook to bring us tea.”

  “Unfortunately, I must refuse the offer as I didn’t exaggerate when I said my visit must be brief. I must not miss the last train to London for dinner with my family.” Lady Patience sank down into the chair and perched on the edge of it. “As I’m certain you know by now, none of the Rockwoods miss a family gathering unless there are extraordinary circumstances. We’ve learned in the most painful way possible not to pass up our time together.”

  “I understand completely. Per—Mr. Rockwood mentioned the loss of your brother and brother-in-law as the reason your family always dines with the children.”

  “Their death still haunts all of us.” The woman reached up to touch her scarred face. As if realizing she’d revealed something she’d not meant to, Lady Patience straightened in her chair. Her gaze pinned on Rhea the other woman eyed her carefully.

  “I have always been direct with people, so forgive me for being blunt, Miss Bennett. Are you in love with my brother?”

  Stunned by the question, Rhea could feel the color draining from her face. Had the Rockwoods discovered her past? Dear God, had Percy revealed something to his family? The moment the question flitted through her head she dismissed it. She stared at the other woman for a moment before she shook her head.

  “The state of my affections is my own, Lady Patience.”

  “I see. Again I must be blunt, Miss Bennett. Percy has told me he proposed marriage and that you refused him. Might I ask why?”

  The question made Rhea stare at the woman in astonishment. To the woman’s credit pink color flushed her features. With a shake of her head Rhea pushed aside her surprise.

  “You may ask,” she said quietly. “However, I shall keep my own counsel in that matter as well.”

  “Would it change things if I told you that I believe Percy has feelings for you?”

  Rhea stiffened as she remembered Percy’s words the other night. The indirect manner in which he’d mentioned love made Rhea’s heart skip a beat. She swallowed hard as she contemplated the woman’s question. Reality closed in on her a moment later. It didn’t matter whether Percy might care for her. She refused to give up control of her body, mind, or soul no matter how much she loved him. A chill splashed over her like a bucket of cold water. She loved him. How had she allowed herself to fall in love with him?

  “You haven’t answered me, Miss Bennett. If you knew my brother loved you, would your answer to my brother’s proposal be different?”

  “No,” Rhea exclaimed vehemently and leapt to her feet. “If Percy sent you here on his behalf, I confess you have made a terrible misstep.”

  “Please forgive me, Miss Bennett,” Lady Patience exclaimed with obvious distress. “Percy doesn’t know I’m here. If he did, I have no doubt he would be furious with me for interfering. But I adore Percy. We have always been close, and I’m convinced his heart is either lost to you or on the verge of doing so. It’s why I took the chance to visit with you. I only wish to see my brother happy.”

  “As I said, I keep my own counsel,” Rhea whispered as panic began to set in. If the woman didn’t leave, she might confess she was in love with Percy. The notion made her suck in a sharp breath. Percy would be relentless if he knew her heart. “I really must ask you to leave, Lady Patience. This conversation has taken a decidedly personal turn which is unwelcome.”

  Percy’s sister eyed her in a manner reminiscent of her brother. It was a look of intense assessment that made Rhea feel as though the woman could see through all the barriers she’d erected over the years. The thought was a terrifying one even though she was certain Lady Patience knew nothing about her past. Percy would never betray her in that regard. She was certain of it.

  Her conviction as to his integrity emphasized how much she’d come to trust hi
m, but the fact didn’t change her position with regard to his marriage proposal. Lady Patience slowly rose from her seat without her gaze leaving Rhea’s face. With a nod, Percy’s sister sighed as an expression of sadness crossed her face.

  “You’re as stubborn as I am, and it is apt to cost you dearly. Not so long ago I almost lost my husband because of that trait.” The woman flinched as a haunted look flashed in her eyes. Lady Patience headed for the door, and paused at Rhea’s side to touch her arm. “Do not make the mistake of letting any real or imagined obstacles stand in the way of your happiness, Rhea. Love can conquer and forgive anything, if you allow it too.”

  With those parting words, Percy’s sister left Rhea standing alone in the parlor. Frozen in place, she struggled with the warning Lady Patience had given her. Was it possible she was allowing her past to stand between her and Percy? The answer to that question wasn’t as troubling as her desire to follow Lady Patience’s advice and trust Percy completely with her happiness.

  “Where has the lady gone, Miss Rhea?” At Ginny’s soft cry of dismay, Rhea turned to look at the girl.

  “Lady Patience had to return to London for an appointment.”

  “Oh, I was hoping she might let me see her hat up close.” The stark disappointment in Ginny’s voice made Rhea move forward to give the girl a small hug.

  “I’m sure she would have if she’d had time to stay.”

  The moment she said the words, Rhea realized it was true. Lady Patience had appeared to have had an epiphany, for the other woman had left the house without covering the scars on her face. Rhea’s scars were of a different nature, and she didn’t think she could put them aside to obtain the life Percy had offered her.

  § § §

  The front door to Beatrice Fremont’s house closed behind Rhea as she paused in the foyer to remove her hat. She pushed the hat pin into the crown of the accessory then removed her gloves and dropped both items on the hall table. Critically studying her reflection in the foyer’s mirror, she saw a woman who looked pale and drawn. She pushed aside the thought she might be feeling melancholy, but she couldn’t deny she was tired.