Sweetly, Deeply, Absolutely (Sweet Love)

by Kira Archer

  He held up a hand. “It’s okay. It is what it is.” He jammed a hand through his hair and took a deep breath. “I’m going to take off for a bit. I’ll call you later.”

  He turned and marched out before she could try to fill him with any more hope. Hope wasn’t going to get him anywhere.

  Jared wandered aimlessly for an hour or two, his head so full of static he couldn’t think straight. When a text came in from one of his buddies telling him to meet up at the club, he decided to go. More out of desperation to take his mind off Jenny than a desire to party.

  Two minutes after arriving, he knew it was a mistake. The answer to what was eating him wasn’t at the club. It wasn’t in the bottle he was holding, or in the arms of the women who kept making passes at him.

  It was in Paris.

  He looked around at his friends, laughing and drinking and making out with complete strangers whose names they wouldn’t remember in the morning. They’d all be hungover but it didn’t matter because they either worked late or had jobs that didn’t require much brainpower or effort. He looked at what had once been the highlight of his life. Partying with his friends. Sleeping late. Taking jobs when he needed to. Doing nothing when that suited him. He thought he’d been happy. But that hadn’t been happiness. That had been complacency.

  Happiness…happiness had a new face. One with sparkling turquoise eyes and perfect, kissable lips. Happiness was seeing Jenny smile. Making her laugh. Sparring with her. Working with her. Holding her.

  Loving her.

  “Hey.” Eric sat down next to him, startling him out of his own thoughts. He handed him a fresh beer.

  Jared nodded his thanks and took the bottle. “What are you doing here?”

  “Gina told me to come find you. I think she’s worried about you,” he said, his expression a mixture of amusement and incredulity.

  Jared cocked an eyebrow. “I’m assuming from that look on your face she filled you in on the last couple weeks.”

  “She hit the highlights.”

  “Fantastic,” Jared said, taking a swig from his beer.

  Eric laughed. “Look, man, I’m not going to tell you what to do with your life. I think you’re already well aware of what you want to do. But I also know you. And I don’t want you talking yourself out of something you really want.”

  Jared snorted. “Don’t worry. I’m not that persuasive.”

  “Yeah, you are. That’s the problem.”

  He chuckled. “You all give me a lot more credit than I deserve.”

  “Actually, I don’t think we give you nearly enough. I also came here so I could thank you for what you did for the bakery while we were gone.”

  Jared tried to wave him off, but Eric continued. “I mean it. You didn’t just help hold down the fort, your deal with the baklava cake is really going to be huge for us. We’ve gotten a lot of calls, from some really big clients. And that spot on the Food Network is going to get our name out even more. Taking that cake on was a risk, but it is definitely paying off.”

  Jared shrugged. “Glad I could help.”

  “You did. So…why don’t you take a few risks like that of your own?”

  Jared laughed a little, shaking his head. “I knew you were building up to that. I can’t take a chance on someone who doesn’t want me.”

  “Well, first of all, from what I heard, wanting you wasn’t her issue. But I actually wasn’t talking about her. Yet. I mean your business. The pamphlets you did for the zoo came in today. They are really good. And I know you’ve got projects lined up with the museum and a few other big-name places. You’ve got everything in place. If you just sucked it up and went for it, you could really do something amazing. Something you’ve always wanted to do.”

  “I did go for it once, remember?”

  “Yeah, I do. You were a twenty-year-old college kid who had five employees and made enough in two months to pay for your college tuition for the whole year.”

  “And then it all crashed around my ears and I lost everything. So why the hell would I want to do that all again, only on a grander scale? I’m doing okay.”

  “Yeah, you are. And if I thought you were happy at ‘doing okay,’ I’d stay out of it and keep my big mouth shut. But I don’t think you are. You’re capable of so much more, and you’re holding yourself back, and you are too damn egotistical to enjoy being on the bottom of the pack when you should be on the top.”

  Jared laughed. “Better be careful. You’re going to inflate my ego even more.”

  “Yeah, well don’t tell Gina, but sometimes it’s warranted. You’re the most talented guy I know, but you’re only doing about half of what you are capable of and I think it’s making you miserable. You just seem like you’re…I don’t know. Coasting through life. At least until recently. Gina said the last couple weeks you’ve been different.”

  Jared sighed and leaned back in his chair. Eric wasn’t wrong. Jared had a lot of ideas. Many that he’d scrapped because going for them meant expanding to a point he wasn’t comfortable with. Or hadn’t been, anyway. Jenny had been inspiring in more ways than one. It was like she’d sparked new desires and ideas that he couldn’t stop thinking about.

  Jared stared at the bottle in his hands. “I don’t think the last couple weeks matter anymore.”

  “Why? Because Jenny left?”

  Jared took another drink, not answering him.

  Eric drained his own bottle and put it down. “I wasn’t talking about Jenny, although I think you made a mistake not going after her.”

  Great. Him and everyone else.

  “I mentioned the business stuff because I think you need to go for it. For you. It’s not going to work unless you are doing it for you. It’s your passion. I know it is. So what’s stopping you? Fear?”

  “You mean, does the thought of ‘adulting’ for the rest of my life make me nervous? Hell yeah! It scares the shit out of me.”

  “Good,” Eric said, to Jared’s surprise. “And rightly so. That direction holds a huge possibility of failure.”

  “You know, you really suck at pep talks.”

  Eric chuckled. “You know what I mean. Being scared means you’ll be cautious. It means you might take risks, but only the right risks. Those who aren’t scared get cocky. They make mistakes.”

  “Like a certain cocky twenty-year-old kid we once knew?”

  “Yeah. But you aren’t that kid anymore. And there’s always the possibility of failure, but there’s also the possibility for a lot more than that. Success. Fulfillment. Family. Love.”

  Jared stared at his best friend. “Jenny.”

  “Jenny,” Eric said, nodding. “So it just comes down to what you’re willing to gamble. Are you willing to take a chance for it all? For her? For you? Willing to put yourself out there for a better life for both of you?”

  Was he? Jared had been asking himself that question for weeks now. He knew starting up his business again wouldn’t be the answer to everything. At the end of the day, he didn’t think Jenny really cared what he did. She just wanted some stability. Wanted to know she could rely on him. A guy who basically worked for party cash wasn’t the type of guy a girl wanted to be in a relationship with, make a commitment to. And hell, why should she? If he couldn’t even commit to a job, how could she expect him to commit to her? Yeah, he’d been burned before, but he was the whole clichéd package now. Older, wiser, better poised to actually make it work this time. And if he could make his business work, maybe he could make other things work, too.

  If he was willing to take the risk. Was he?

  He looked back at Eric. “Fuck yes.”

  He downed the rest of his beer and stood up.

  “Where are you going?” Eric asked.

  “I’ve got some work to do. It’s time to go get my girl.”

  Chapter Twenty-One

  On a charming street in Paris, Jenny sat with her iPad in the little alley behind the corner of the patisserie where she worked. The segment with Street Treats
and the cake had aired the day before and Gina said they’d gotten a clip of it and put it up on the bakery’s website. Between school and work, Jenny hadn’t had a spare second to watch it. As much as she didn’t want to see the horrendous woman who would be conducting the interview, she did want to see how it had gone. And, if she was totally honest, she wanted to see Jared. But being totally honest tended to be very bad for her mood, so she tried to avoid it when possible.

  She’d been back in Paris nearly three weeks and she hadn’t heard from him once. She’d finally broken down and asked Gina about him. But her sister-in-law hadn’t been very forthcoming with information. Which was both odd and extremely irritating. All Gina would say is that he’d been busy and she hadn’t seen much of him.

  So, as pathetic as it was, she was going to hide in the alley and watch the video of him talking about her cake. Multiple times, if necessary. Which it probably would be. The last several weeks without him had been the most miserable of her life. Oh, she was happy to be back in her little apartment. Happy to be back in the city she’d grown to love. But without him, the rosy glow had faded a bit.

  Okay, screw her mood, time to admit that she’d run away. She’d run as far and as fast as she could. From Jared. From what they might have had together. From the reminder of what she thought they might have had.

  What kind of a stone-cold hypocrite was she? Sitting there lecturing him on being an adult, being more responsible, when at the first sign they might have something real between them, she’d turned tail and ran? Literally. When she did something, she did it right. She put a whole damn ocean between them.

  Yes, her reasons for doing it were valid. She was in the middle of school. She had a home, a job, an education, a life, waiting for her in Paris. Things she wasn’t willing to turn her back on. Then again, no one had suggested she should. They hadn’t known each other long, and as intense as their time together had been, they’d both realized they needed time to get to know each other.

  So why couldn’t she have agreed to that? Phone calls, maybe a Skype session or two? Hell, was she really so terrified of commitment that she couldn’t even agree to a long-distance getting-to-know-you kind of thing?

  Apparently.

  Cutting her vacation short might have been a slight case of overkill. And what had it accomplished? Nothing. She’d been back for weeks and still spent every waking moment thinking of him.

  Maybe it was time to stop running. Time to take her own advice and “adult up.” Face her fears. Try to have something meaningful with someone for once. So what if it had never worked out for her before? She’d never felt for anyone the way she felt for Jared, even after such a short time. From the moment he’d landed in her lap she’d known he was different. And they’d been through so much together already. He’d been there for her every step of the way. He was kind and funny and crazy sexy and made her laugh like no one else. Wasn’t that worth pursuing? Wasn’t that worth the risk of heartbreak?

  If she never took the risk, she’d never find out. It might not turn out well, but at least she wouldn’t spend her whole life wondering. And the reward if it did work out…her heart lurched, doing the happy dance in her chest.

  Yeah. It was worth it. He was worth it.

  Time to stop running.

  The video finally stopped buffering and started playing. Only it wasn’t Jared standing there talking to Anna. It was Eric. What the hell?

  The segment was great. Anna had gushed about the cake, showed several breathtaking pictures, Eric had been charming and funny, and the bakery had gotten glowing recommendations all around. Jared had been right. It was going to be incredible for business. And since the whole thing had been his doing, she’d really love to know why he hadn’t been on the show.

  Before she could call Gina to ask, one of the cashiers stuck her head out the back door and rattled off a quick stream of French. Jenny sighed and nodded. Living in the country for two years had certainly improved her high school French. But they’d often get tourists dropping in who didn’t have that advantage. A decent percentage of Parisians spoke English, but if Jenny was there, it was usually easier for her to take care of the tourists. And apparently there was one at the counter now.

  She stashed her iPad back in her purse and hurried out to the front. She stopped short the second she saw who stood there.

  He smiled. That big, smug, overly confident smile that made her knees weak. The smile she hadn’t been able to get out of her head since the moment she’d first seen it.

  “Jared?”

  He put his hands in his pockets and glanced up at the menu board. “So, what’s good here? Got any baklava?”

  She came around the counter, heart nearly jumping from her chest, but stopped just before she reached him. “What are you doing here?”

  “I heard this was a great place to go if you were looking for a little something sweet.” His gaze roamed over her until she shivered.

  He bit his lip, and she about threw herself at him right there in front of all the employees and pastry lovers who were currently watching them with extreme interest.

  “See anything you like?” She couldn’t resist playing the teasing game with him.

  “Oh yeah. In fact, I’ve been craving something for weeks.”

  She may have stopped breathing. Hopefully, if she passed out, someone would move her out of the flow of foot traffic. “And you had to come all the way to Paris for it?”

  “Well, someone once told me this was the best place to come for sweet, delicious things.”

  Yep. Her lungs were definitely not cooperating. She forced a deep breath, reminding the swooning bastards to circulate some air.

  “Plus,” he said, the smirk on his full lips letting her know he knew exactly what she was thinking, “apparently this city is very well known for its art. Being an artist myself, it seemed a shame that I’d never seen it.”

  “You came to see the art?”

  “No.” He moved close enough that they stood only a few inches apart. “I came to see you. The art’s just a bonus.”

  “Jared…”

  “I miss you, Jen.”

  There were a million things she could say. A million protests, arguments for why they’d never work, excuses to turn and walk away. But she said the only thing she really wanted to say. “I miss you, too.”

  “Let’s walk.”

  She turned around to find not just the customers in the shop, but also every employee and her boss watching them like they were the Christmas Hallmark special. She raised her eyebrows in question, and her boss made a shooing motion with a dreamy smile.

  “I guess that’s a yes.”

  Jared smiled again and held out his hand. She took it, trying—and failing—to hide the shiver that ran through her at his touch. His hand tightened on hers, and he led her out of the shop.

  They walked for a bit in silence and he seemed perfectly content to remain doing so. She, however, couldn’t take it anymore. She pulled her hand from his and rounded on him.

  “Okay, come on already. What are you doing here?”

  “I had to sign a few contracts. I thought, instead of having them mailed, I’d come and sign them in person.”

  She folded her arms. “You flew all this way to sign contracts? On what?”

  He gestured to something behind her and she turned around. There was nothing behind her but an apartment building.

  “Jared…” She spun back around. “Wait…”

  He chuckled and wrapped an arm around her, turning her to face the right corner of the building. “See that window on the top floor at the corner?”

  “Yeah,” she whispered, the word sticking in her throat.

  “I just signed the lease.”

  She turned to him, shock wiping every coherent thought from her mind. “Why?” she finally managed to ask.

  He reached out to caress her cheek. “Do you really have to ask?”

  She pulled away from him. “Um, yeah, I do!” She was t
hrilled to see him, embarrassingly so. But that didn’t mean that anything had changed between them. “I haven’t heard from you for weeks. After everything you said before I left, you let me walk out the door. You didn’t come after me. You certainly didn’t try to get in contact with me, even for a Words with Friends game, or something, let alone an actual phone call. And now suddenly you show up and tell me you signed a lease on an apartment in Paris. What the hell?”

  He pulled her over to a bench and sat down. She followed, but kept her distance, remaining standing so she could hold herself stiffly away from him.

  “I’ve been trying to get things set up. It took a lot longer than I expected. Especially for my damn passport. Do you know how long it takes to get one of those things? I paid every extra fee I could find to get it expedited and it still took more than a week. That’s better than the usual six-plus weeks, but still. Then I had to jump through a million hoops getting my new business up and running and hiring my very first employee. I think you’ll like him, by the way—a little high-strung, but extremely talented. And I’m interviewing another one next week.”

  She held up her hand. “What business?”

  He reached into his pocket and pulled out a business card and handed it to her. “Jared Crew Designs?” she read. There were two addresses listed on the card. One in New Jersey. The other in Paris. Her knees decided to turn to goo, and she sank onto the bench.

  “You set up a business? Why? You didn’t have to do this. You were happy how things were.”

  “No, I wasn’t. I thought I was. Until you came along and showed me how empty and shallow my life really was. Until I had a taste, even for a short time, of how much more I could have. I didn’t do this for you,” he said, pointing to the card. “I did it for me. I was doing well enough on my own. But as a bona fide business, with a couple employees under me, I can take on some of the larger projects that I’d always wanted but didn’t have the capability to handle on my own. And I can expand. I’m not just doing marketing projects. With the extra help, I can take the time to focus on my painting again. Do some portraits. Maybe even study up on a few things while I’m over here. Put together a show or something one of these days. Plus, they can handle projects for me when I need to get away for a bit.”