by Jordan Deen
“He can’t even send me images anymore.” The bitterness in my voice was hard to mask. Even though, I suspected it was truly my fault we weren’t going there and not Brandon’s.
“That is going to take time. Trust me, the love you’ll feel for Brandon will be unlike anything you’ve experienced before. I know others have told you that it will be like you can’t breathe without him, but it’s true. When he’s away from you, it will feel like your skin is being torn away from your body just so it can reunite with him. That is why Emile and Brea went with the group this time, and why Lily sometimes accompanies Matt. Even at her young age, Lily can sense and feel Matt’s emotions. Matt can sense hers even better than his own.”
“If I’ve bonded with Brandon, truly bonded, then why can’t I feel that now?”
“Alex was able to confuse you with his presence. The flower bracelet he gave you blocked the connection with Brandon from forming.” The extravagant charm bracelet Alex gave me to match his necklace; it bound me to him. I knew that. If I still had it, it would probably be easier for him to be with me. “We are trying everything we can to restore your bond. It’s just going to take more time. But it’s worth it. It’s worth every ounce of the hard work.”
“You are only saying that because that is what you want me to do. What if I’m not supposed to be with Brandon? What if this isn’t the way things are supposed to be, and you guys are pushing it, forcing it.”
“We aren’t forcing the match. We are trying to force your transformation before either of you come down with the sickness,” Serena said and drummed her fingers on the table. “If either of you are stricken, there is no saving you. I may be powerful, but even I’m not that good.”
“If you aren’t that good, then why do you think you can succeed at growing my bond with Brandon?”
“Don’t get discouraged, we just need to find the right method. There’s not one right answer for everything.”
“I’m trying not to. I think I’m just tired of trying to compel a bond to form with Brandon. We are never alone, he doesn’t talk to me, and everyone here hates me. Michael said it’s like I went to summer camp, and that’s what it feels like. I’m not allowed in the woods, the girls aren’t nice to me, and the only people that talk to me are the camp counselors.”
“That’s not true. Lily looks up to you like a big sister, and I understand you and Nicole have grown quite close.” Quite close? I don’t consider one interrupted conversation in the woods close.
“Nicole is only nice to me because Brandon told her to be, and Lily? She annoys me most of the time. I’m an only child. I’ve never had to share anything.”
“Well, then see it as a learning experience.” She ran her fingertips down my forearm. My hands firmly clenched around each other, my knuckles and fingers turn bright red from the pressure. “Even though you’ve given up on us, we refuse to give up on you. We are doing everything we can to figure this out.” Nothing had worked so far, and it didn’t matter. Alex was coming for me. He’d find that book with the cure, we’d be back together, and Brandon would be with Bailey. All would be right in the world again.
Just as he promised, Alex came to me every night for the next week. He told me about his new pack and traveling with Brent and Kayla. He wasn’t sure what happened to my parents. Honestly, he probably knew they were dead, and didn’t want to tell me. But, I still held out a small glimmer of hope that they were safe.
Unfortunately, after the first enchanting week, Alex’s visits became fewer, since they hadn’t found the book yet. The first night he didn’t show up, I threw a mini-tantrum and refused to get out of bed the next morning. No one really noticed, or cared.
Brandon stayed in camp, but he hadn’t spoken to me in a week. He even moved out of our shared cabin with Emile and Michael, and started staying in Trevor and Britney’s cabin instead. Lily hardly left my side, but she kept herself busy with her Barbie and reading books Nicole brought her from town. A town I still hadn’t gone to, let alone knew the name of. Lily probably overheard me say she annoyed me. Most of the camp hated me already, so having her—and Brandon—shun me wasn’t really horrible.
Serena backed off a little with the mating topic, but continued our daily meetings, insisting that I needed to focus on me before I focused on anyone else. Twice we went to her cabin to study the history books and learn more Lamanic, but mostly, I read her journal. Around page thirty, it got really interesting when she tried to cast a love spell over Daniel to force them to mate. It didn’t work, and on page forty, she started singing Josef’s praises. Surprisingly, her journal didn’t dwell on Daniel or her crush on him, which occupied the first thirty-nine and a half pages of the book. Instead, she wrote about the color of Josef’s hair in the sunlight, the yellow flecks that surrounded the irises of his eyes, and the cute beginnings of a dimple he had on his left cheek. Which, after staring at his photo over the fireplace for an hour, I never saw a hint of. She must have seen something I couldn’t. And the yellow flecks? I didn’t see them either. Although, there had been flecks in Brandon’s eyes at one point, but that was only a distant memory. He lost that twinkle in his eye a long time ago… at least when he looked at me.
c h a p t e r
SEVEN
Information was shared on a need-to-know basis. And whilst I believed I really wanted to know what the heck was going on, one thing was true—ignorance equaled bliss.
The iPod hung from my belt as I swiped the furniture polish over and over the same caked-on spot on the council table. It had to be from the stew the night before, but it was dried on and crusted like a knot on the wood; a knot that refused to budge. My forearm started to spasm from the repeated circling. If I had a computer, or access to a car, I could charge my iPod and not have to pretend that Fall Out Boy was cranked.
Brandon and Serena walked into the great hall, so I bounced back and forth to my pretend music, acting totally oblivious to their presence. The spot still wasn’t going away, but rubbing at it was better than having to discuss mating, my future, my obligations, or how I’ve disappointed everyone with my lack of interest.
“How has this happened?” Brandon asked with his back to me. They were just at the edge of my peripheral vision. Brandon rocked back on his heels with his hands stuffed hard into his pockets. Serena’s hand rested on Brandon’s strong shoulder. “Lily said she can’t get into Lacey’s dreams anymore. It’s like Lacey is completely shielding herself from all of us. I can hardly sense her anymore. Do you think she still dreams of him?”
“Brandon, you are going to drive yourself insane with this. Concentrate on the task at hand. Let me work with her. Lacey and I have a bond that can’t be denied. She’ll let me in.” They both looked toward me. I rubbed harder and harder on the table, and tried to remember to bounce like a high paced song blared in my ears. I wished it were.
“She’s been here over six months and she practically cringes when I touch her. Can his hold still be that strong?”
“I don’t know. There are things with her that make absolutely no sense.” She shook her head, and I couldn’t agree more… starting with the fact that I’m supposedly a werewolf, but have felt none of the changes they said would happen.
“Serena?” Emile came out from the kitchen and stopped their conversation. “When will Michael be back?” I bounced a few more times, and smiled dumbly when Emile glanced at me.
“They should be back by dark,” Brandon answered. “They had to pick up things from the hardware store.”
Emile glanced at me again, and I pretended to be all involved with the stew stain from hell. There was no way it was coming off the table. It would be a permanent fixture for future werewolf generations to enjoy.
“Have you talked to her yet?” Emile asked as she closed the gap between her and Brandon.
“No.” Brandon straightened and pushed her hand away as she tried to brush his hair off his eyebrows.
“Why haven’t you? You know avoiding her is not going to he
lp anything.”
“Well… us not being allowed to be alone isn’t helping anything either. Alex can be alone with her anytime he chooses… why can’t I?” The fake music was long forgotten, and my arm was limp over the stain. The room quieted as all eyes fell on me. I grabbed the iPod off my belt, and fake spun the dial looking for a song. Everyone in the room, including me, held their breath. With the iPod secured onto my waist again, I shifted back and forth in my own little world. No one around me the wiser that I was seriously pulling a Lily, the little eavesdropper. Maybe I had learned a few things from her.
“Brea’s here!” Lily’s loud, shrill voice vibrated the windows in the large room.
“What?” Emile, Brandon, and Serena said in unison.
Behind Lily, a girl about my height and size walked up with a guy at least the size of Brandon. “Hey, party people!” she announced. “Anyone up for a game of hide and go find the Amana’s hideout?”
“Brea, Catch. What are the two of you doing here?” Serena hugged the girl, but seemed hesitant. It didn’t take long for Brea’s green eyes to fix on me. I couldn’t avoid any of them, any longer. I pulled the earphones out, and turned to face the real music.
“You must be Lacey.” She kept her voice even as she crossed the room. “I’m Brea.” She ignored my outstretched hand and wrapped her arms tightly around me. She smelled like caramel mocha latte and butter croissants. Instantly, I missed my favorite coffeehouse back home that Jillian and I used to stop at before school.
When Brea leaned back, she took my hand, and twisted her fingers around mine until we were holding hands. “That’s Catch.” She pointed to the guy she came in with. Trevor and Matt joined him; all three carried large suitcases. “If you haven’t guessed, I plan on staying awhile and getting reacquainted with my BFF.” BFF?
My new BFF, Brea, and Catch, were practically quarantined shortly after they arrived. No one new had appeared in camp since we took it over, so everyone was buzzing over our guests. Even Lily couldn’t contain her excitement. I tuned most of Lily’s ramblings out, but I did get that Brea’s younger sister, Trish, was Lily’s best friend, and if Brea showed up, there would be a good chance that Trish and her parents would follow shortly. Brea recently turned eighteen, and pretty much mated and transformed the day after. Some of the rumors around camp was she was one of the strongest female werewolves in the pack and she would have been my personal guard, if the Mares hadn’t stolen me.
At dinner, they sat Brea and Catch at the complete opposite end of the table, next to Brandon, Michael, and Emile. I had been banished to the other end; must’ve been that whole need-to-know issue again.
After dinner, everyone scattered. Longingly, I watched them go, until I realized everyone basically relocated to Trevor’s cabin. Nicole, Bailey, and Lucia all bounded up the stairs. Being a loner in my new life sucked as the sounds of them laughing and cackling, billowed through camp. My useless iPod laid next to me on the bed, there was no need to fake it now. Lily and Matt joined the in-crowd, and Michael and Emile had already retired to their bedroom.
I hummed my favorite song trying to combat the emptiness, but it wasn’t the same. The iPod case had all my favorite stickers attached, including a bright pink Hello Kitty one that Jillian attached as a joke. Jillian and I had been best friends since grade school. We spent every summer together and shared every first together. It sucked not having her shoulder to cry on, and to hear her tell me everything would be okay.
“Hey, you awake?” Brea lightly tapped on the door.
“Yeah, come on in.” I sat up and pulled the covers to my chest, blocking the rush of cold air that accompanied her.
“So…” She pulled out a well-worn black and white photo from her pocket. It had an old style crib and two babies wrapped in matching blankets. A huge smile overtook her perfectly heart shaped face. “That one is you,” she pointed to the baby on the left, “and that one, is me. We have been best friends since birth, but I’m sure they’ve already told you all about me.”
I hated bursting her bubble. “Actually, they’ve never mentioned you.”
We sat in silence staring at the photo from a different life, one I never knew.
“Well, it’s no matter. They can’t keep me away from you now! Let those jerks come and try to take you again! HA! They don’t have a chance with me here.” She giggled and threw her arms around my neck to pull me close. She was only a baby when they took me. Where our instant bond came from, I had no clue.
“I want to know all about you. What makes you tick? What have you been up to for the last eighteen years?” She kicked off her shoes, picked up the opposite end of the blankets, and cuddled up across from me on the bed like she belonged there. “Here, I brought you something.” Her perfectly slender fingers pulled two candy bars from her pocket. “Well?” She held out the candy like a peace offering, it was the kindest thing anyone, other than Brandon, had done for me since I arrived at camp. Without a second thought, the wrapper was off the candy bar and the first bite slid down to my happy stomach.
Mmmmm… caramel and peanuts and chocolate… and Mmmm…
Brea unwrapped hers and savored her first bite. “Chocolate fixes everything…”
“I agree.” I laughed as a long string of caramel flicked off the bar and down my chin. “Oops.” I started to wipe it away, but her fingers were quicker than mine.
“It happens.” She laughed. I laughed. Then we laughed together, a musical sound that quickly echoed through the cabins halls. Between the laughter and the sugary goodness, every one of my muscles started relaxing. “What type of music do you like?” She pointed to the iPod. I really hoped she wouldn’t ask to listen to any of the songs.
“I like alternative mostly. I listen to all types though.”
“Me too.” She pulled her iPod from her back pocket. Her tattered case looked identical to mine with stickers from her favorite bands plastered on the outside. “But there are no computers here to load music or charge the damn things. Have to do it in town.”
“I’m not allowed to go to town.” I finished the last of her bribe, wondering where she would go with the conversation and if she had any more chocolate goodness with her.
“Seriously? They don’t let you go to town?”
“No.” How much should I really tell her? Do I tell her I’m not allowed to be alone with Brandon? Do I tell her it’s because I’m in love with someone else and he’s coming for me? Do I like her enough to tell her she might be in danger being near me? Then again, if I told her, she may rat me out to warn the others.
“Well, that’s stupid. We’ll fix that. They’ll certainly let you go to town with me. We’ll go tomorrow.” She sounded beyond self-assured of her pull within the pack. “You’ll see.” She bit off another piece of her candy bar. “What else? What did you like to do? I’m assuming the people that took you never had any other children?”
We stayed up, talking about life, school, family, and Lily’s annoying Barbie habit, that Trish also shared. Brea and I were so much alike, except she was the super gorgeous, self-assured, werewolf version.
By two a.m., Lily was knocking at the door, wanting to go to bed. Neither of us was ready for the conversation to end, but Lily brought Catch in for reinforcements. Brea’s demeanor changed the minute
Catch came into the room. Like two magnets hovering close to each other, he easily pulled her into his side, bending her to his will, and ending our conversation. The other mated couples were sappy sweet with each other, but Catch and Brea raised the bar tenfold. They were two halves of a whole, and together, they were an unstoppable force. She was the flighty, outgoing type; Catch was the strong, silent type. A perfect yin to her yang.
Brea hugged me before leaving for the night and promised we’d hang out again in the morning so we could finish catching up on the past eighteen years. It was refreshing to finally have someone interested in me, the real me, without the expectation that I’d wake up and fall in love with the future leader
.
The next morning, Brea sat on my bed and watched me sleep for who knows how long. When I finally woke, she held out a large ceramic coffee mug and a Danish.
“Where did we leave off?” She grinned and pulled the covers over her sweat pant covered legs. Sweat pants, something else that was in short supply in camp, and seeing hers made me really want a pair.
“Well, I worked part time at my aunt’s—or I guess my fake aunt’s—veterinary clinic.” My thoughts fizzled and spiraled out of control as I tried to think of why my parents and my aunt would encourage me only to destroy me in the end.
“What’s wrong?” Brea asked, pulling her mug to her lips. But she answered her own question, like she read my mind. “I’m sure they loved you very, very much. You don’t nurture someone from infancy and not develop a strong connection to them. They are probably just as heartbroken over what happened. For all you know, Sophie could have betrayed them too. They may not have known the real reason for taking you.” Hearing Sophie’s name sent shivers down the length of my spine. She was the leader of the Mares, and my mortal enemy. Worse, she was Alex’s mother.
“You really think so?”
“Sure. I mean, think about it. Why would they have raised you all those years? If they weren’t told you were going to be destroyed, then I can see them investing their time. But, if they were told from the beginning that you were going to be killed, then why not do it when you were a baby and get it over with?” Her kind eyes showed more confidence in the story than I had. My parents told Brandon that they didn’t mean to hurt me, but if that were the case, why did they willingly hand me over to Sophie?
“Thank you,” I said, raising my mug, “for being so cool. I haven’t been able to really talk to anyone about that night.”
“Well, you always have me. I won’t leave you again. Ever.” She hugged me, giving way to silent comfort; I wasn’t sure how to react, other than to hug her tighter. “You ready to go to town?”