I didn’t touch him or ask how he was. Only went on to the bathroom to get ready for bed.
Two bad days in a row for mascara. I didn’t normally think I cried so easily. Being the cause of people I love attacking me, and each other, then them almost being killed—then there not only being nothing I could do for them but me actually making it worse—must be special triggers for me.
I went to bed, unable to resist offering Isaac a glass of water on the way, which he lapped from, then rested his chin on his paws.
Still saying nothing, I put on a nature soundtrack on my charging phone on the bedside table for white noise, turned out the light, and lay there. I eventually had to start the thing over, wide awake after half an hour.
No dinner after all, yet I didn’t feel hungry.
No answers, yet I didn’t feel curious.
Isaac had let me help him when he’d been badly wounded before. We’d been alone, though, and a quick, emergency situation. As soon as he’d felt better enough to get around and over the shock, he’d dismissed me by going to bed in fur and refusing to follow me to sleep in the main house.
I’d seen both Jason and Kage suffer small injuries and lap up attention—quite forlorn in fact. Andrew had said that was also different. Maybe it was like playing checkers with your family and losing, versus playing a big soccer game with your team in public and losing.
Sometime in the middle of the night, while I still lay awake, Isaac returned to the bathroom in the dark.
I covered my ears and shut my eyes while he changed.
I moved over, still didn’t say anything, tossing back the duvet.
After a few minutes he came to bed. I let the album play out and finally fell asleep with my head on his overly hot chest, listening to his heartbeat and very, very grateful for the privilege.
Chapter 22
Another late morning. We were supposed to check out today, but didn’t have to until 11:00 a.m.
I lay in bed with Isaac after sunrise, listening to others in the halls and on the stairs. More from strangers than voices of my own pack.
Could Kage see? Had he changed again? Was Jason okay? Jed’s arm? Was Andrew conscious? Had he changed or did he need to wait and let his head heal some?
I didn’t ask.
Isaac kept kissing me—lips, hair, throat, hands—caressing my arms and back as I lay facing him. I kissed him in return, still grateful, but had to disengage, tucking my head down on his chest when he started pushing.
The room grew lighter as the field and back gardens outside became bathed in morning sun. A soft mist rose from every damp, cool surface of the Dales landscape.
A glimpse out the window made me wish to be among it, to see the steam off the roof at The Gables and the gardens as if on fire.
We really would have to get up after all.
Isaac was trying again. He kissed my lips. While I saw the vampire bursting around the corner to hit him. He kissed my eyelids. While I saw the fist punching into Kage’s eyes over and over. He kissed my fingers. While I heard the crunch of breaking bones.
He clearly still had a fever, skin flushed, hot, but not sweating or shivering. I was the one who still felt shaky.
Finally, I couldn’t stand it anymore and had to ask if he was okay—to which he assured me he was wonderful. His beard rubbed pleasantly over my neck. Not pleasantly enough to keep my mind from last night.
I didn’t say anything else that I wanted to. Like I was sorry for embarrassing him by being around last night when he was sick. Or sorry for leading them there in the first place. Or sorry for this whole “investigation.”
A quick tap-tap-tap at the door. A flood of relief for the normalcy of the sound.
I disengaged my mouth from Isaac’s to call, “What do you want, Andrew?”
“Merely to join our Belle in bed. It’s all the rage around here—so they say.”
More relief. He was fine. They would all be fine.
“Sure. Go for it.” I rolled over, letting out a breath with many pent up tensions.
Isaac curved against me, able then to kiss the back of my neck and stroke my breasts.
“Your door’s locked, darling.”
“Yes, that’s too bad. Oh well.” But I reached to check my phone, dropping my voice for Isaac. “It’s not too late for breakfast if we go soon. I don’t even know where we’re heading from here so we probably should get up and talk things through. Make sure everyone’s all right also.”
Isaac’s tongue on the nape of my neck made me shiver. He clearly had no intention of getting breakfast. Knowing that at least Andrew was up and okay, reminded of the remarkable healing they were capable of, I decided I could also be distracted after all. I could always get coffee on the road. I pressed back into him.
A rattle and click, then pop, and the door opened.
I looked up sharply, propping up on an elbow and staring while Isaac also looked around, suddenly rigid against me.
“Andrew? What the hell—?”
“Thank you for the invite, Belle. You’re a lamb.” Andrew delicately shut the door and came around the bed to me. He wore only red shorts and laceless sneakers.
“How did you get the door open?”
“How do you think? Magic?” He chuckled, shoving back the duvet. “I picked the lock. This is not exactly a high-security, key card establishment. In case you hadn’t noticed.” Slipping off his shoes and hopping into bed to face me as he spoke.
Isaac, the secure one, was usually tolerant of the others. Or at least he seemed to be. This, however, was crossing a line. I thought he might climb over me at Andrew, body tense, fingers digging into my arm.
I pressed my hand over Isaac’s. “Andrew? You need to leave.” I couldn’t help adding, “Your eyes look okay.”
“Not so bad yourself.” He settled with his head on my pillow, hand below it, our noses a few inches apart. “What I really wanted to ask, though, was what are we doing? Breakfast is being served, the natives are restless, and we’re not sure whether we’re coming or going.”
“I was just thinking the same thing. I’ll come down. We all need to talk and sort out what we’re doing. Will you please go? We’ll be right there.”
I wanted to at least ask about Kage’s eyes.
Instead, Andrew was about to answer, still showing no signs of shifting his position, when Isaac ran out of patience. He leaned over me, Andrew leaning back to the edge of the bed, so Isaac’s face was between mine and Andrew, mashing me into the bed.
He spoke in Lucannis to Andrew. No idea what he said, but it wasn’t good morning, and it wasn’t short. A paragraph of words, spelling out something in no uncertain terms, voice low and shaking with anger.
Andrew slunk from the bed as Isaac moved off me to prop himself on an elbow, still focused on Andrew.
“So, anyway … let us know,” Andrew said without looking at me, his whole aspect changed, closed off as he slipped his shoes back on.
“Yes, I’ll be there shortly,” I said.
He left without another word.
I rolled over to face Isaac, who was already back to trying to kiss my neck.
“You didn’t have to do that,” I said. “I was getting rid of him.”
Isaac kissed my mouth, my jaw, up to my temples, then a light caress over my eyelids. Back to my lips, saying only that he loved me.
I hugged him, told him I loved him too, then apologized. Though feeling guilty for leaving him frustrated, I had to go. More than sorting out the day and getting out of here, I needed to get moving to make sure my pack was all right.
I set Isaac’s things out for him before a quick shower, no hair washing—only trying to rinse last night away—and a partial change. His shirt was destroyed, but the rest had escaped with only a few blood stains that would probably come out.
By the time I emerged, brushing my teeth, Isaac was gone.
Raised voices in the room next door? Not a news flash, yet I hurried to finish up.
As I tied my shoelaces, I heard a crash and felt my own room vibrate with impact of what sounded like either a heavy piece of furniture or a person falling to the floor.
I dashed from the room in time to see Isaac reach the bottom of the stairs and turn for the front door out of The Gables.
The door was open into what was now Jed and Zar’s room and both were in there, along with Andrew. Andrew was the one on the floor, apparently unable to breathe, retching and clutching his own throat. Zar crouched over him. Jed sat on the foot of one of the two beds, smirking. He made very little effort to modify his expression when he saw me—smirking out the window instead of at Andrew’s suffering.
“Andrew?” I stepped into the room. “What happened? Is he okay?”
Zar glanced around. “Crushed his windpipe.” To Andrew, “Maybe change and you can have a while in between? Sit up here for a spell?”
Andrew, face rather purple, was finally starting to draw little snatches of air.
“He’s right. Change so you can have a rest before you have to go back,” I said. “We’ll save breakfast for you if you can’t come down.” Then I ran.
Down the stairs, through the door, around the gravel lot, bursting into fresh morning sun with the mist burnt off. Through the gardens to the gate, where Isaac, shirtless, was visible beyond, striding quickly away over the field, toward the fells, just as Kage had run.
“Isaac!”
He did not look around or check his stride, but held his hand out behind him, palm flat like a stop sign. He kept power-walking away.
I started to open the gate but only stood with my hand on the latch.
Bite the river. He’d told me a long time ago, first thing, to never mess with him when he was angry—that he had a temper and to leave him alone.
I watched him until he vanished among the gorse and dry stone walls and trails into the fells.
By the time I turned around, Zar was coming through the garden to me, face drawn and anxious.
“All right, Cass? Don’t go after him…”
“No, I wasn’t. What happened?”
He joined me at the gate, both of us sideways to the morning sun. “Isaac was put out about Andrew getting in bed with you.”
“I know, I mean … what happened that I wasn’t there for. He tried to strangle Andrew?”
“Oh…” Zar looked across the field. “Not for that. Only rowing with him for that. Andrew goaded him.”
“Goaded him? What did they say?”
Zar chewed his lip and watched a robin sore into the nearby apple tree.
“Zar?”
“It doesn’t matter, Cass.” He was actually blushing, which wasn’t easy for him, he was so dark.
“Could you give me the gist without the details?”
“Isaac says Andrew needs to leave you alone when he’s with you—that if you’re with Andrew that’s your business but when Isaac’s with you it’s his.” One-shoulder shrug and he finally looked at me. “Sounds fair enough. But Andrew said all kinds of sterk back to him. We all know not to mess with Isaac.” Shaking his head. “Especially when he’s already livid. Andrew was asking for trouble. Probably wanted Isaac to lose his temper with him to get your sympathy. Like Jason goading Jed around Kage. A sort of … way to get back at Isaac for what Isaac had said to him.”
“And Isaac choked him? Will he be all right?”
“He’s fine.”
I blew out my cheeks. “And I don’t suppose Jed helped pull him off?”
“Jed thought it was a laugh. That’s the sort of thing he’s bound to think is funny, though. Not often someone gets the best of Andrew.”
Yes, that was the trouble with Jed. I was growing fond of him in fur. In skin, though … hit or miss.
“Speaking of Jason and Kage?”
“Gone. Kage went out early, before dawn, and Jason followed him. I heard them. No idea where they are.”
Did that mean they were feeling better? Could Kage see properly? Or were they hurt animals trying to be off by themselves?
I stood there, staring across the field.
The sun was shining. A beautiful day in Yorkshire. Half the pack was scattered in the fells, fresh injuries, no one packed to go, no idea what we were doing next, no idea if everyone could drive, or even where we were heading, yet we had to check out and vacate the place in two hours.
And, aside from the beauty of the day, every part of it was my fault.
Zar watched me for a while, mute, then stepped closer to rest a hand on my shoulder, arm across my back.
“We’ll keep going, Cass. We knew all along this might not—”
“I shouldn’t have come back,” I whispered, still looking to the field.
“What?” Zar’s arm tensed against my back. He sounded shocked. “Cass—”
“It was a mistake. But, if I had, I should at least have followed my instincts to keep things professional between all of us. I’m hurting you—not just Kage and Jason. All of you. Even your whole pack. Right up to this morning, starting more fights and more trouble. And it’s only going to get worse until I have to leave. At which point, what will we have to show for it? I’ve led you to failure and loss and almost your own deaths—repeatedly. I don’t know when I grew so arrogant that I thought I could be your silver. I’m not a wolf. I’m not a detective. And I’m very, very sorry I’m the best you could find when it came to human help.”
Zar only watched me while I talked. Even from the corner of my eye the pain and grief on his face was unmistakable.
As I stopped, he wrapped his arms around me, kissed my temple, and said, “I’m not.”
Chapter 23
Some friendships only last as long as the shine on a penny.
I’d thought of my grandmother’s words when I’d had to say goodbye to my pack a week ago. Returning meant running into tarnish. Which I’d wanted, of all things: wanted to know them, wanted to see how they lived. Wanted this.
Which brought to mind another old adage. Be careful what you wish for.
I had breakfast with Zar, asking for extra sausage and bacon instead of beans and tomatoes, as did he. I ate only a slice of fried bread and jam, unable to taste either, with a cup of black coffee, but didn’t have to wait long for Zar to swallow his own breakfast. He did not swallow it all, however. The eggs, bacon, and bread he gulped, then left the last slice and rolled his three sausages onto my untouched plate.
I stared at this for a long time, hating that my eyes filled with tears again because that seemed to be all I’d been doing lately. Of course, Zar knew they weren’t for me. Knew exactly what he was doing.
I couldn’t speak or keep drinking. On my feet with my plate and the coffee in hand, before I could manage a swallow and, “Thank you, Zar.”
He followed me upstairs without a word.
Jed had gone out, electing to skip breakfast like the rest, aside from Zar and Andrew, who’d meant to attend with us. I found the latter on the blanket in his shared room that Jason had presumably occupied last night.
Andrew still seemed to be having some difficulty breathing. He lay with his head up, mouth wide, not exactly panting, but breathing in long, deliberate efforts. He turned his head to me as I slipped into the room. The door wasn’t even locked, and no one should be in fur in this place in daylight when someone could be around, but it didn’t seem important just then.
“Hey, red,” I said as I slipped in, referencing his resemblance to a red wolf, other than size. Andrew was significantly larger. “How are you doing?”
He pricked his huge ears, twice the size of the others’, and looking all the larger because of his short, close coat. Sniffing eagerly, he crawled across the blanket like an invalid, wagging his tail.
I sat on the floor with the plate in my lap and fed him one sausage link at a time, which he swallowed. I tore the tough bacon into strips so he could also swallow those without harm to his throat.
“This is from Zar also. He wouldn’t tell me what you and Isaac said.”<
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Andrew rested his chin on my thigh and rolled his eyes up to my face, revealing crescent circles of white that were still bloodshot from the throttling. He tapped his relatively thin, black-tipped tail on the blanket.
“How do you do that? Move your ears and tail around? Is it instinctive? Do you have to learn when you first learn to change? Like a baby learning to crawl? Or do you change for the first time and your ears move more or less on their own?”
In the same position with his eyes rolled up to me, Andrew laid back his right ear and brought the left forward, then switched them. Then back again.
I smiled, almost laughed, which felt so welcome I leaned my head back on the footboard and took a few long breaths through my nose with the smile still on my lips.
Andrew thumped his tail.
I tore up the egg white and held the plate for him to gulp down the egg, licking up the yolk, then set the plate aside.
“Andrew? We’ve got to find the others and move on. Home, I guess. I thought I’d talk to Isaac about the Mountain Pack. And anyone else who knows other shifter groups in the British Isles. I’m not sure what I want to talk to Isaac about now, though. We should go home and ask Diana to point us in the next direction for approaching the shifter community. Unless Zar has any ideas.”
I stroked his head, the short fur soft and smooth, like the head of a German shepherd with that long face and big ears. In fur, he probably didn’t weigh any more than I did. Maybe less.
Andrew watched my face, chin once more on my thigh, ears flat while I stroked him.
“I wanted to get everyone together. Have an actual sit-down meeting between the seven of us about what’s happening and what we do next. I have notes and sketches from scrying…” I sighed. “But we can’t now. I don’t even know where half the pack is.”
I absently rubbed one soft ear tip between thumb and forefinger, looking to the sunny window.
Moonlight Betrayal: A Reverse Harem Shifter Romance (The Witch and the Wolf Pack Book 5) Page 13