Hopes and Dreams

by P. J. Trebelhorn

  “Monday,” she said quietly, looking at their hands as Vic smoothed her thumb over the back of hers. “I would have been off tomorrow, but I had to switch with one of my assistant managers in order to have tonight off for the reunion.”

  “Maybe we could make a date to meet here for the sunset?”

  “I’d like that. I could cook dinner for you. What do you like to eat?”

  “I’m not picky.”

  “Meat loaf?” Riley asked, expecting her to balk at the suggestion.

  “I would love meat loaf.” Vic chuckled, obviously suspecting Riley thought she would say no. “When’s the next day off after that?”

  “Not until next Sunday,” Riley said. Even though she loved her job, she hated the hours. She had to be there pretty much all the time, but Sunday through Wednesday were the best days, business-wise, to take off. And if her assistants needed time off, she ended up sacrificing her two days off, like this week. But sitting here looking at Vic, she didn’t regret it one bit.

  “Then I would like to ask you on another date for next Sunday.” Vic was looking at her expectantly, but Riley didn’t say anything right away.

  “Are you trying to monopolize all my time off?” she finally asked, still staring up at the sky.

  “God, yes,” Vic said with a chuckle. “I’m only here for two more weeks, and I want to spend as much time as I can with you. And I would like to ask you on a date for the following Sunday as well.”

  Riley looked at her, and Vic could swear she saw confusion at first, but then the reason she would ask for a date on that particular day seemed to click in Riley’s mind. She shook her head vehemently.

  “No, I am not going to Vanessa’s wedding with you.” God, she hated weddings. She hated getting dressed up, and she despised all the love in the air. It made her think too much about what she didn’t have.

  “Not the wedding, the reception,” Vic said, squeezing her hand. She tried to turn in her seat, but the chair wasn’t cooperating. “Damn it, I love the way these chairs look, and they’re comfortable, but they can succeed in making the most coordinated person look like a complete fool when you try to stand up.”

  Riley giggled, mostly because she agreed with her. “Then don’t stand up and I won’t laugh at you.”

  Vic narrowed her eyes but couldn’t stop grinning. “I would never ask you to attend a wedding my mother has spent way too much time and money planning. The ceremony will no doubt be a display of my family’s wealth. But will you please be my date for the reception?”

  “Won’t you be sitting next to your sister since you’re the maid of honor?”

  “Usually, yes, that’s where I would be expected to sit. But I seriously hate being the center of attention, and since my mother hates me, we’ve come to the agreement that I will be sitting at the first table instead of being up with the rest of the family and the wedding party.”

  “I’m sure she doesn’t hate you,” Riley said, and she was surprised when Vic snorted laughter. “That was an interesting sound.”

  “I’m going to glide right over that unfortunate incident and hope it never happens again.” Vic’s cheeks reddened, and Riley thought she’d never seen anything more adorable, although she thought it best to not say it out loud. “Trust me when I say she absolutely does, and I’m okay with it because the feeling is completely mutual. I have my father, and my sister, and they’re all I need. But I’m not letting you change the subject. Will you go with me?”

  “You just don’t want to have to fight off all the single men who ask you to dance.”

  “I’ll admit while that is an appealing perk, it is not the reason I want you to go, believe me.” Vic looked up at the stars again and sighed. “I enjoy spending time with you, and I’m not looking forward to having to return to the city the following day. I really do want to spend all the time I possibly can with you before I leave. I want to know everything there is to know about you, Riley Warren.”

  Riley wasn’t quite sure how to respond. It was so easy to forget Vic’s time in town had an expiration date, and she really didn’t like thinking about it. And honestly, there wasn’t all that much to know. Riley was an open book. She had no father, her mother was an alcoholic who neglected her growing up, and she worked far too much. How interesting would her life possibly be to a woman like Vic?

  “I had a crush on you in high school,” she said, and immediately wished she hadn’t spoken those words. God, how embarrassing. She pulled her hand away and stood to walk over to the edge of the roof.

  “God damn chair,” she heard Vic mutter and turned to see her looking decidedly ungraceful as she tried to get to her feet. She met Riley’s eyes and pleaded with her. “A little help?”

  Riley walked back to her and held her hand out, which Vic took without a word, and pulled her out of the chair. She let go immediately and went back to the edge, but Vic was right there with her, putting her arms around her middle and pulling her so Riley’s back was flush against Vic’s front. She rested her chin on Riley’s shoulder and spoke directly into her ear, causing goose bumps all over her body.

  “Tell me about your crush,” she said.

  “I shouldn’t have said anything.”

  “But you did, so now I want to know,” Vic said before placing a light kiss right below her ear. “Why didn’t you ever tell me?”

  “Seriously? You were a part of the cool kid clique who bullied me relentlessly,” Riley said. She wanted to pull out of her embrace, but it felt too good. “Why the hell would I say anything and risk even more of it?”

  “I’m sorry, you’re absolutely right,” Vic said, tightening her hold on her and nuzzling her neck. “I probably wouldn’t have been receptive to it back then but, looking back, I’m pretty sure I had a crush on you too.”

  “You’re so full of shit.”

  “No, I’m being serious here.” Vic sighed, and the exhale of breath tickled her ear. “I didn’t know for sure until college that I was a lesbian, but you…you confused the hell out of me. I was nothing more than a big bundle of nerves around you. In fact, I was so anxious around you I became physically sick sometimes.”

  “I just thought you hated me.” Riley turned in her arms and looked her in the eye.

  “I think that’s what I wanted you to think,” Vic said with a crooked smile. “I think in my underdeveloped teenaged mind, I was under the impression that if you hated me, I wouldn’t feel those things anymore.”

  “Yeah?” Riley asked as she tilted her head to the side. “How’d that work out for you?”

  “It didn’t. You hated me all right, but it just amplified the confusion and nervousness.”

  Riley stared into her eyes, looking for any kind of sign to indicate she was lying, but there was nothing other than sincerity looking back at her. She placed a hand on Vic’s cheek and her stomach fluttered when Vic leaned into the touch. She felt her pulse kick up a notch or two before she moved closer and pressed her lips against Vic’s. Their kiss started out slow and sexy, but soon turned into something more akin to desperation. Vic’s hands moved down to Riley’s ass and pulled her body even tighter against hers, causing Riley to groan.

  “Fuck,” Vic said as she put a little distance between them. “I should go.”

  “No,” Riley said, surprising even herself. “Stay.”

  “I thought you wanted to take things slow,” Vic said, her pupils dilating and telegraphing her arousal to Riley.

  “I did. I do,” she said. “Do you think we could sleep in the same bed and not have sex?”

  “If that’s what you want,” Vic said with a slow nod. “I would do anything for you, Riley.”

  “If you can keep your hands to yourself, then I will go with you to the wedding reception.”

  “Does that mean I can’t hold you?”

  “You can hold me. You can even kiss me,” Riley said as she took her by the hand and led her back to the stairs that would lead them to her bedroom. “Just don’t try and get in my
pants.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  Vic woke with a start, slightly disoriented because she wasn’t immediately sure of where she was. But then she realized she had a warm body pressed against her front and looked down to see Riley sound asleep. She smiled and held her a little tighter.

  She’d been surprised the night before when Riley had confessed she had a crush on her twenty years ago. This was all so surreal. She closed her eyes and took in the scent of Riley’s slightly coconut shampoo. If this was a dream, she didn’t want to wake up.

  This wasn’t like her, she had to admit. She didn’t share a bed with a woman she hadn’t had sex with, but this felt so right. Riley felt so right. She stiffened slightly when Riley shifted, but then she stilled again with a soft sigh. Vic relaxed, but she wanted nothing more than to make love to Riley. She looked down again and saw they were both dressed, just not in the clothes they’d worn to the reunion. Vic remembered Riley giving her a pair of shorts and a T-shirt to sleep in, and Riley was dressed the same.

  She should probably leave. Vanessa was no doubt worried about her, but she abhorred the thought of getting out of this bed. She started to pull her arm away from Riley where it was snug against her stomach, but Riley’s hand gripped her wrist and pulled it closer to her, resting it between her breasts.

  “Jesus, Riley, you’re killing me,” she whispered. Riley burrowed back into her, moving her ass against Vic’s crotch. She sucked in a breath, not wanting to wake her. She stayed still for a few minutes, just listening to Riley breathe, but then couldn’t deny any longer that she had to pee. Badly. She somehow managed to slip out of the bed without waking her up and grabbed the clothes she’d worn the previous night before disappearing into the bathroom attached to Riley’s bedroom.

  After she was dressed, she used a bit of Riley’s toothpaste and brushed her teeth with her finger before exiting the bathroom and stopping for a moment to look at her. She’d curled herself around the pillow Vic had used and was holding it tightly. Vic wanted to wake her up but knew it would be a bad idea. Mostly because she had no doubt she wouldn’t want to leave if she did.

  She started for the kitchen but stopped when she heard the front door open. Probably Megan coming in from getting the morning paper. Megan jumped and put a hand over her heart when she saw Vic standing there.

  “Holy shit,” she said. “You scared the hell out of me.”

  “Sorry,” Vic said, but she was smiling as she took note of the fact she wasn’t the only one wearing last night’s clothes. “Just coming home?”

  Megan blinked at her for a moment before removing her shoes and walking into the kitchen, Vic following a few steps behind. “I’m not even sure how you could think that’s any of your business.”

  “You’re right, I’m sorry again,” Vic said, leaning against the counter and crossing her arms over her chest. Megan had begun making coffee but stopped and turned to look her up and down.

  “I see you haven’t made it home yet.”

  Vic fought the urge to squirm under her scrutiny. She was sorry to say she wouldn’t even have recognized Megan if she hadn’t known she was Riley’s roommate. And given the way Megan was eyeing her, she wondered if she was in the same boat.

  “No, I haven’t.”

  “You know, I never could tell the two of you apart, but I’m going to make an educated guess and say you’re Victoria.”

  “Vic, please,” she said with a nod. “Good guess, considering Vanessa is marrying a man in two weeks. Wouldn’t that be quite the scandal. Not sure my mother’s heart could take a shock that big.”

  Megan chuckled and resumed getting the coffee ready. “Are you staying for breakfast?”

  “Riley is still asleep, so probably not.” Vic unconsciously glanced up the stairs toward Riley’s bedroom. When she refocused on Megan, she saw she was being watched again.

  “She’s my best friend.” Megan wiped her hands on a dish towel as she spoke. “If you hurt her, I swear to God I will hunt you down and kill you myself.”

  “Down, girl,” Vic said, putting her hands up in front of her and shaking her head. “I find it admirable, and honestly would expect no less, but I have no intention of hurting her. In fact, I have the feeling I may be the one who ends up hurt.”

  “How do you figure?”

  “I care a great deal for Riley,” Vic said, looking down at her feet. She really should be telling Riley this, and not her best friend. But she knew she needed to convince Megan if she had any hope of ever convincing Riley. “But I strongly suspect once I go back to the city, I may never see her again unless I’m the one who comes back here. Am I right?”

  “Probably. Riley’s never been one to travel too far from home. She’d never admit it, but I think she worries too much about her mother. Personally, I think she should cut off all ties to the woman, but she won’t listen to me.” Megan sighed and glanced at the ceiling. “It’s not as if she ever really acted like a mother, you know?”

  “No, I don’t,” Vic said, wondering at the knowledge they had both grown up with mothers who weren’t really mothers. Maybe it was an epidemic in Wolf Bay. “Are you close with your mother?”

  “What does that have to do with anything?”

  “Nothing.” Vic put her hands up again and decided it was time to get out of there. She really didn’t mean to continually put Megan on the defensive. “I should go.”

  “Wait, you said she was still asleep,” Megan said, shaking her head in obvious confusion. “You’re just going to leave without saying anything to her? Do you make a habit of sleeping with women and running out before they wake up?”

  “Whoa, I think we have a misunderstanding here.” Vic chuckled, which seemed to make Megan even angrier if the red tinge to her cheeks was any indication. “We didn’t sleep together. Well, we did sleep together, but we didn’t have sex. Not that I don’t want to, but Riley wants to take things slow. And really, it isn’t any of your business what I make a habit of doing, because Riley means so much more to me than any…you know what? I’m babbling. Tell Riley I’ll call her later, okay? It was nice to see you again, Megan.”

  She turned and walked out the front door before realizing she’d ridden there with Riley the night before. She pulled out her phone and called Vanessa when she got a few houses away.

  “Where the hell are you?” Vanessa asked as she answered the call.

  “Good morning to you too,” she replied with a sigh. “I need you to come pick me up.”

  “Mother is furious, you know.” Vic didn’t miss the tinge of happiness in Vanessa’s voice at the declaration. “She’s actually wandering around the house muttering to herself about how she never should have let you stay here.”

  “Good,” Vic said. She walked around the corner and found herself standing in front of the diner. She told Vanessa where she was. “I’m glad I could be the cause of her inevitable nervous breakdown.”

  “I’ll be there in twenty minutes. And don’t think I’m at all happy about you forcing me to drive.”

  * * *

  “Tell me everything,” Vanessa said the second Vic got into the car. “I have to live vicariously through you now, you know.”

  “There’s nothing to tell.” Vic closed her eyes and leaned her head against the headrest.

  “Bullshit,” Vanessa said, slowly pulling out onto the road and heading toward the house. “Everybody saw the lap dance she gave you last night, and you left with her right after. You can’t convince me you didn’t have sex with her.”

  “It wasn’t a lap dance. Frank was giving us a hard time, and he didn’t believe I was a lesbian. She decided to prove it to him.”

  “Jesus, Vic, if you’re doing this to get under Vera’s skin, I’d say mission accomplished.”

  “What the hell does that mean?” Vic looked at her, surprised.

  “You’ve made your point. You can stop cozying up to the trailer trash.”

  “What the fuck, Vanessa?”

  “Come
on, are you trying to tell me you actually like her?” Vanessa glanced at her with an incredulous look on her face, and Vic had to tamp down the urge to slug her. “I mean, come on, she was such an easy target. Secondhand clothes, some of which were donated to charity by our own mother, an alcoholic mother and no father. You can’t be serious.”

  “Let me out.” Vic was amazed her voice sounded so calm, because she was anything but.

  “Don’t be stupid.”

  “Are you forgetting she actually saved your life, Vanessa?”

  “I thanked her, and now I can move on.”

  “Stop the fucking car and let me out. Now.”

  Vanessa slammed on the brakes and turned to look at her. Vic just shook her head and stared out the windshield for a moment before reaching for the door handle. Vanessa’s hand on her arm made her pause for a moment.

  “Vic, I’m sorry, okay? You know I want you to be happy, but do you honestly think you can be happy with her? Think about what you’re doing. Think about what your last name is, for God’s sake.”

  Vic yanked her arm away from her and got out of the car. Before closing the door, she leaned down and looked back in at her.

  “You’re no different than her. God, how could I never have seen it? And for your information, I don’t give a damn about our last name. It’s meant nothing but pain and suffering for me most of my life. You can fuck off.”

  She slammed the door and walked to the edge of the road, wondering which way to go. Vanessa pulled the car over and got out, looking serious as she walked toward her.

  “Have I got you good and riled up?”

  “What?” Vic was thoroughly confused.

  “Frank was at the house this morning talking to Vera.” Vanessa stood a couple of feet away from her, her hands firmly on her hips. “I don’t know what they were saying, but I can sure as hell guess. I thought I’d get you all worked up so you wouldn’t be blindsided by her when we got home.”

  “Wait, so…this was all an act?”

  “Of course it was. You know me better than that, Vic. You know I always have your back.” Vanessa shook her head and looked away for a moment. “I’ll admit I don’t really know what you see in her, and I think she’s just going to break your heart like every other woman has because she only wants your money, but what the hell? You’re only in town for another two weeks right? Then you’ll probably never see her again. Have fun while you can.”