Hopes and Dreams
Page 13
“Are you saying she’s difficult to deal with?” Riley asked.
“To say the least.” He put his arm around Riley and squeezed gently. “If she gives you any problems, find me. I’ll deal with her.”
“Thanks, Dad,” Vic said, seeing Vera heading toward them looking decidedly pissed off. “Here she comes now. I think we might go inside for a bit.”
“They’re going to be doing the toasts and cutting the cake and all that stupidity in about an hour, so don’t stay gone too long.”
Vic shook her head in amusement as he made his way back to where Vera had been sidelined by someone Vic didn’t recognize.
“What’s inside?” Riley asked when they were alone again.
“There’s something I want to show you, upstairs in the room I had when I was younger.”
“You’re just trying to get me alone, aren’t you?” Riley grinned, and Vic feigned shock at the suggestion.
“I would never use an ulterior motive to get you alone.” She started leading her back inside, but then stopped and looked at her. “For future reference though, would that work?”
“No.” Riley shrugged. “Maybe?”
Chapter Twenty
Riley looked around the room they went into, marveling at how much it looked like the typical teenager’s room, circa late nineties. There were posters on the walls, CDs on a shelf along with a few Star Wars action figures. There was one poster in particular that caught her attention, and she couldn’t help but snicker.
“What?” Vic asked, sounding somewhat defensive.
“Seriously?” Riley raised an eyebrow. “Britney Spears?”
“What can I say?” Vic shrugged as her cheeks turned pink, and Riley thought it was adorable. “I was obsessed with her, but I had no clue why.”
“And now you do?”
“Well, no, to be honest.” Vic laughed. “I don’t find her at all attractive. And I’m pretty sure she can’t sing all that well without all the electronic enhancements to her voice.”
“Thank God, I was beginning to question your judgment.” Riley went back to looking at the mementos from Vic’s youth.
“And what kinds of posters did you have in your room?” Vic asked, a teasing note to her tone.
“Whitney Houston,” Riley said without looking at her.
“Definitely more attractive than Britney.” Vic smiled when Riley turned around, wondering if she was being made fun of. “And there’s no doubt she could sing a thousand times better.”
“You were into The Phantom Menace, too, I see.” Riley picked up an action figure of Darth Maul and looked at it more closely.
“Hello? Natalie Portman?” Vic looked at her like the reason should be obvious, which of course it was.
“Yeah, I’ll have to agree with you on that one,” Riley said as she tilted her head to look at the CDs it seemed everyone in their graduating class had been listening to. “So, what did you want to show me?”
Vic walked over to her desk and opened a drawer. She pulled out a notebook and opened it before looking at her again. She held it out to her, but she seemed reluctant to actually let her have it.
“You said you didn’t believe I had feelings for you in high school,” she said quietly. “I kept a journal our senior year. I want you to read this part.”
“Are you sure?” Riley asked, surprised. “I never kept a journal, but I would imagine it’s a pretty private thing.”
“It is, and no one has ever read it before. But I want you to, because this part’s about you.”
Riley took it but never looked away from Vic’s eyes. Vic sat on the edge of her bed and sighed. She looked so vulnerable, and Riley felt a fierce need to protect her despite her reluctance to trust in the things Vic said over the things she’d heard Vanessa say the night before.
“I don’t have to,” she said, shaking her head and trying to hand it back to her. Vic held up a hand to stop her.
“I really want you to.”
Riley held her gaze for a moment and finally nodded once before sitting next to her. Her heart was pounding because she wasn’t sure what she was going to read. She hoped it wasn’t going to dredge up all those old feelings of being bullied. She took a deep breath and looked down at the notebook to start reading.
God, I am so over the way they’re treating Riley Warren and her friends. Nobody deserves to be bullied like that. They’re so cruel! Riley can’t help it if she’s poor and has to wear secondhand clothes to school. And as for her mother being a drunk? So not Riley’s fault.
“Thank you for acknowledging it wasn’t my fault that my mother drinks.” Riley wasn’t sure she wanted to keep reading. She really didn’t want to relive the past.
“I wanted to tell you how I felt then, but you know the crowd I was hanging around with.” Vic motioned for her to continue, so she did.
But what I hate the most is when they call her a dyke and a lesbo. I tried to come to her defense yesterday, but then they just started calling me those names. It bothers me that it bothers me, you know? But then I think, what if I am? I know I shouldn’t give a fuck what anyone thinks of me, but I do care what Vanessa thinks. She’s so disgusted by the mere possibility someone in our school might be gay—how would she react if her own twin sister was?
Riley stopped again and looked at Vic. She shook her head and reached for her hand. After bringing it to her lips briefly she held it in her lap.
“I had no idea they made you feel like this about yourself, Vic. God, I wish you’d felt like you could have talked to me about it. It might have changed things. For both of us.”
“Keep reading. You might not feel that way after you see what’s next.” Vic smiled to soften her words, and Riley chuckled, figuring she already knew what was coming next.
So, I can’t be a lesbian. But God, Riley confuses the hell out of me. I see her in the halls, and all I want to do is be near her. I sit next to her in English, and all I can think is how good she looks and smells, and I want to be even closer than our desks allow. My heart races, and my palms sweat, and I can’t stop thinking about her. I think I want to kiss her, but then I realize kissing would never be enough. Damn it, I can’t wait for graduation, and then I can get out of this shit town and be away from her. Away from the one person I know I’ll never be able to have.
Riley closed the notebook before roughly wiping the tears from her cheeks. How was it possible Vic had been having the exact same feelings Riley had back then? Jesus, so much time wasted. She turned her head to look at Vic, but she was staring straight ahead, a couple tears of her own on her cheek. Riley gently brushed them away before putting her fingers under Vic’s chin and forcing her to look at her.
“I wish you’d told me,” she said, her voice strangled.
“I wish I’d had the nerve to,” Vic said with a shrug. “I was never honest with myself about how I felt until I wrote that down, and I had my head up my ass about it all until I went off to college.”
“You could have had me.” Riley nodded and smiled. “You definitely could have had me.”
“If I only knew then what I know now.”
She leaned in to kiss her, and Riley let her. But when Vic tried to push her onto her back, Riley moved away from her.
“I’m not doing this here,” she said. “Your mother could walk in any minute.”
“Then she’d get what she deserves for not knocking first,” Vic told her. She groaned when Riley stood and went to place the notebook back in the drawer.
“Come on, we don’t want to miss the whole party, or they’re going to think we’re doing that anyway.” She walked toward the door, but Vic grabbed her around the waist before she could open it.
“You have no idea how much I want you right now,” Vic said into her ear before her tongue moved along the rim, causing a shiver to run through Riley.
“I think I might,” she said, turning in her arms to kiss her. It ended too soon when the door opened, and Vera Thayer was standing there.
“Chill out, Vera,” Vic said, and Riley tried her best not to laugh at the absurdity of it all. “It was only a kiss.”
“Don’t tell me to chill out, and when did you start calling me Vera?”
“Don’t try to save face, Vera. You know I started calling you that when you made it clear I was no longer your daughter.” Vic took Riley by the hand and led her out to the hallway. “And we’re not leaving unless Vanessa tells us to. Or have you forgotten this is her day, and not yours?”
They left her sputtering and hurried down the stairs before they both broke out in uncontrollable laughter. Riley glanced back up, almost expecting her to be running after them with her hair on fire. She couldn’t believe the woman really had just walked into the room without knocking. She was glad she’d stopped what would have surely been a much more embarrassing situation.
“What’s so funny?” Vanessa asked, walking up to them. “Come on, share.”
“Vera caught us kissing,” Vic said when she’d stopped laughing long enough to get the words out. “She wants us out of her house, but I told her we weren’t going unless you told us to.”
“You aren’t going anywhere,” Vanessa said before she switched her gaze to Riley. “Neither of you are going anywhere. She caught you kissing? Where?”
“In the bedroom.” Vic looked at Riley and seemed as if she might start laughing again.
“Serves her right for not knocking.”
“Exactly what I said.”
“Come on,” Vanessa said as she threaded her arms in both Vic’s and Riley’s as she turned them toward the door leading to the backyard. “The festivities are going to start soon.”
“I hope you don’t mind,” Vic said, looking around her sister to see Riley. “I put you in for the filet mignon and lobster tail for dinner.”
“Lobster again?” Riley asked with a grin. “You’re going to spoil me.”
Vanessa and Vic shared a look that Riley couldn’t decipher, and she had the feeling she’d said the wrong thing. Vic smiled at her, but it seemed forced to Riley. She tried to push it from her mind and allowed herself to be led into the backyard. Vanessa left them at the table in front, facing the long table set up for the bride and groom and their parents. Riley found the placard with her name on it and began to sit, but Vic was right there.
“Allow me,” she said, pulling the chair out for her. Once seated, Vic leaned down to speak into her ear. “You really are beautiful today. Promise you’ll dance only with me.”
“I promise,” she said, directing her gaze to Vic as she sat in the chair next to her. She wasn’t entirely sure she even wanted to dance, but when Vic looked at her that way, she was pretty sure she wouldn’t be able to deny her anything.
Chapter Twenty-one
Dinner was amazing, which didn’t really surprise Vic. Vera would never serve anything to her guests but the very best. And the most expensive. Vera gave the speech that should have been Vic’s to give, but she hadn’t wanted to stand up in front of all these people anyway, so she didn’t put up much of a fight when Vera announced her intentions. So, they sat through all the speeches and, at some point, she’d reached under the table to hold Riley’s hand. Since Riley didn’t object, she’d left it there until it was time for the cake cutting, and then dessert.
She watched Vanessa dance with their father, and Vic couldn’t help the swell of love she felt for them both. He seemed genuinely happy for Vanessa. He’d always claimed Vanessa was the baby since she’d been born twenty minutes after Vic, so therefore Vanessa was his little girl. Vic didn’t mind it though because she’d always been his firstborn.
She was lost in her thoughts when Riley squeezed her hand to get her attention. Vic looked up and saw Vanessa was motioning for them to join in on the dancing. She couldn’t believe she’d missed the end of the father-daughter dance and the beginning of the bride and groom’s first dance. She stood and held her hand out for Riley who smiled as she took it.
It was a slow song, so when they stopped next to Vanessa and Martin, she turned and took Riley into her arms. She heard people murmuring, but she really didn’t care. She had a gorgeous woman in her arms, and it was the happiest day of her sister’s life. Of course, the loudly screamed oh, my God got everyone’s attention, and they all stopped what they were doing. Vic wasn’t shocked to see it had been Vera, and she was being held by her father.
“What a fucking drama queen,” Vic said, loud enough for only the four of them to hear it.
“She’s done everything in her power to take the spotlight away from us today,” Vanessa said, shaking her head. She placed a hand on her new husband’s cheek and gazed into his eyes.
“At least she isn’t going on our honeymoon with us.” He laughed, but Vic and Vanessa looked at each other. “Wait, she isn’t, right?”
“No, dear,” Vanessa said. “You’re stuck with just me for the next two weeks.”
“Thank God. You had me worried for a minute.”
“Just don’t be surprised if she shows up at some point though,” Vic said, somehow managing to keep a straight face. He looked horrified.
“Relax, she’s kidding,” Vanessa said.
Vic turned her attention back to Riley and smiled at her. They moved slowly to the music, and Vic loved the way Riley’s body felt pressed tightly against hers. If only they weren’t in front of a crowd of people.
People danced well into the evening, and Riley had kept her promise to dance only with her. Well, except for the one song her father somehow managed to finagle. Vic didn’t mind because he talked to Riley through the entire dance, and even made her laugh at one point. Why couldn’t Vera be more like him? Vic glanced over at her, still at the main table, and saw she was glaring at her. Vic refused to be goaded into anything. She waved at her and turned to Vanessa when she touched her arm.
“We’re leaving soon.”
“God, no, don’t leave me here with her,” Vic pleaded.
“Daddy will be here,” Vanessa said with a swat on her arm. “He’ll protect you. He seems pretty taken with Riley.”
“He does, doesn’t he?”
“She makes you happy, doesn’t she?” Vanessa looked her in the eye, and Vic nodded. “But don’t forget, your place is in the city, not here canoodling with her.”
“Again with the canoodling?” Vic laughed. She saw Martin looking their way and she nudged Vanessa toward him. “I think your husband is trying to get your attention. Have fun on your honeymoon. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”
“I can tell you right now I’ll be having sex with him, and I know that’s something you wouldn’t do, so I won’t make that promise.” Vanessa hugged her tightly then let go and stepped back.
“Yeah, I guess I can’t expect you to.” Vic kissed her on the cheek. “Don’t forget to send lots of postcards.”
“Not gonna happen. I’ll be otherwise engaged.”
Vic just laughed as she watched her go to her husband and then she sighed. It had never occurred to her before this moment she was actually going to have to share Vanessa with someone. The realization made her a little sad. Yeah, she and Martin had been dating for some time, but they didn’t live together, so that left plenty of time for her and Vanessa to still see each other away from work most of the time.
“You look like you just lost your best friend,” Riley said as Vic felt her hand slide into hers.
“No, I’ve gained a pretty awesome brother-in-law.” Vic smiled as she looked at her. “You want to dance some more?”
“I think I’m all danced out. Take me home?”
Vic nodded, wishing it was something she could hear Riley ask her more than this one time. She glanced around for her father and was disheartened when she saw him back at Vera’s side. She sighed.
“Just let me go tell my father I’m giving you a ride,” she said. “Come with me?”
She walked up behind her father and placed a hand on his shoulder. He turned to look at her and smiled as he covered her hand. She glanced at Vera before leaning closer to him.
“Riley’s ready to go, so I’m going to take her home now. I’ll be back to have a night cap with you.”
“No, you will not,” Vera said with so much venom Vic actually took a step back. “You were only here for Vanessa, and now that she’s gone, so are you.”
“Vera, she’s leaving in the morning, isn’t that soon enough?” her father asked.
“You have no idea what I caught them doing.” Vera looked thoroughly disgusted as she shook her head. “I want her gone now.”
“It’s all right,” Vic said with a quick squeeze to his shoulder. “I’ll see you Tuesday morning at the office.”
“This is your home too, Vic,” he said, directing an angry look at Vera. “You will not be made to feel unwelcome here.”
“You have to pick your battles, you taught me that.” Vic shot a look at Vera as well. “This one isn’t worth fighting. It never has been. And honestly, I’ve felt unwelcome here since before I left for college. Why do you think I never came back?”
She turned without another word and took Riley’s hand, leading her back into the house. She heard her parents arguing as they walked away, but she tuned it out. It felt good to have her father fighting for her, but she had no desire to hear anything else Vera had to say about her.
“Are you okay?” Riley asked as they walked into her bedroom again. Vic didn’t like the look of unease on her face and forced a smile and a nod.
“Fine. I just need you to wait for a few minutes while I get my things.” She moved around the room, picking up any stray items she may have left behind. She’d done most of her packing the night before, knowing she’d be leaving first thing Monday, so it was really only toiletries she needed to grab.
“No problem,” Riley said as she took a seat on the edge of the bed. “Where are you going to stay tonight?”