HIS DOUBLE, HER TROUBLE

by Donna Sterling

  She rode to work with him, venturing out into the brisk winds of the season's first heavy snowfall. As snow caked on the windshield between quick sweeps of the wipers, Jake navigated the car around a slippery curve. "Do you have good snow tires on your car?" he asked her.

  She hesitated a little too long. "The tires are fine."

  "Why haven't I seen you driving a car?" He hadn't thought about that fact until now.

  "Mine's in the shop. The engine's being rebuilt. They're having a problem getting some of the parts."

  "You don't still have that old sedan you bought in college, do you?"

  "There's nothing wrong with it that can't be fixed."

  "You've had it for ten years. Why not buy a new one?"

  "I don't see the point. It's completely paid off. My house is close enough to town that I can walk anywhere."

  "In snow like this?"

  "I could have called a friend."

  "What about when you work late at the office? Do you walk home alone after dark?"

  "If I feel like it."

  An unfamiliar sensation reached into him, like a cold, shadowy hand hovering above a vital organ. Even in towns as small as Pleasantville, women could be assaulted walking alone at night. "Are you saying you can't afford a car?"

  "Of course I can afford a car. If I wanted a new one, I'd work it into my budget. I happen to think it's more important to pay off my mortgage sooner and build up a bank account to fall back on in case of … in case I… Really, Jake, this is none of your business!"

  He didn't press for an answer. He saw the stubborn tilt to her chin, the militant squaring of her shoulders.

  He'd never known a woman more set on doing things her own way.

  He supposed he understood that. He'd walked out of his grandfather's house on the threat of being disinherited for the same reason; he intended to live life his way. An inheritance from his parents gave him a good start. Brianna hadn't had that advantage. But she'd put herself through college and bought a nice house in the historic district of town. It couldn't have been easy.

  She deserved to have more. He wanted to give her more.

  "What about your charity work?" he reminded her. "Food and clothing drives, toys at Christmas. You still do those?"

  "Well, yes. It would be easier working with the kids if my car ran," Brianna admitted. Her lack of transportation actually bothered her a great deal this time of year. She wanted to be doing more than making phone calls in their drive to collect coats and boots for the poor. She would have liked to personally visit the kids and take them to weekend festivals and ball games. They needed a little time away from their dreary home lives. She'd been in their situation for a brief, terrifying time. She knew their desperation.

  "Which kids are you working with now?" he asked.

  "The ones in our community who don't have much or go many places without someone who can—" She broke off, hesitant to get started on a subject so close to her heart. She was feeling particularly vulnerable this morning and didn't want to engage her emotions about anything too deeply. "My car will be working soon," she insisted, drawing the topic to a determined close.

  "Until then, you can use mine. It's just sitting in the garage while I'm driving Evan's."

  "Your black Maserati?" she asked, amazed that he'd offered. The small sleek car had probably cost more than her beloved house.

  "What's wrong with it?"

  She bit her lip to stop a laugh. She'd be the envy of every guy in town if she drove that car. The women would be peeved to think Jake Rowland had given it to her to drive. Wouldn't the rumors fly! She couldn't consider it. "The kids would get a charge out of it, that's for sure," she mused, keeping her sarcasm mild. "I could probably fit two little ones in the passenger seat, on an older one's lap. The trick would be getting them all into seat belts, especially the three I'd have to carry on the roof."

  "At least it's transportation."

  "I can't drive your car around town. Too many people would recognize it. They'd wonder why I was driving it. You're not supposed to be here, remember? I don't like borrowing cars, anyway. I'll just wait for my own."

  She was relieved when he nodded in acceptance of her decision. Only then did she silently concede that it had been kind of him to worry about her. Again, she realized how different he was proving to be than she'd expected. But she didn't want him to be kind. Passionate, yes. Kind, no.

  She didn't want to blur the line she'd drawn in the sand.

  By noon, her voice mail was full of messages from supervisors insisting she call them. She'd been visited by employees from every department and the universal question seemed to be: Is it true that Mr. Rowland is putting the changes into effect that he announced this morning?

  While she'd been working on employee benefits, Jake had met with department heads. Unable to speak with him because of his busy schedule, she left a message for him.

  He called her into his office at noon. "Did you want to see me, Ms. Devon?"

  "Yes sir, Mr. Rowland, I do." As soon as she'd closed and locked the door behind her, she rounded on him. "I'd like to know what the hell you're doing. Why did you announce those changes? You can't really put them into effect." His old colors seemed to be shining again—mischief and mayhem in eye-catching hues.

  Dropping a pen onto his desk, he leaned back in his chair and lifted a brow. "Which changes don't you like?"

  "It's not that I don't like them. Of course I like them. Where did they come from—the idea box?"

  "So it would seem."

  She stared at him in consternation. "Answer me, Jake."

  "Ideas I've chosen will go into effect next week. Sales reps can work from their homes and cars instead of from the office. Their sales figures will decide whether they're doing a good job. Once they're set up at home, the company will need less work space here and have lower utility bills."

  The neat logic came as a surprise to her. "Okay, I can understand the sales reps working from their homes and cars, but what about the clerical staff? I've heard you're planning to let some secretaries work from home, too."

  "Why not? As long as their bosses don't have special projects that require their presence, I see no reason they can't produce the same work from home. Computers, phone systems and fax machines make that possible."

  "And job sharing?" She was almost afraid to ask about it, so fervently had she wanted that particular program. Working mothers had begged her to let them share jobs to spend more time with their families.

  "As long as only one of the two employees sharing a position needs benefits, I don't see how it would hurt."

  "Oh, it wouldn't hurt the company," she assured him. "Most of the ones who want to share jobs have benefits through their spouse's employer."

  He smiled at her, and her confusion deepened.

  "Can you make these changes? You're here to impersonate Evan. Has he given you permission?"

  "I've talked to him." His voice and expression hardened almost imperceptibly. "He knows what I'm doing."

  "Will the board allow you to make these changes?"

  "I have all the authorization I need." His tone left no room for question. She supposed she shouldn't worry about the changes, since he had approval from Evan and the board. "Brianna, the changes we've just discussed are ones that will be popular with the employees. But we're going to have to make a few others that won't be."

  "Oh?" She sank down into the seat beside his desk, thoroughly worried now. "What changes?"

  "Some of our bigger commercial accounts will have to be sold to other insurance companies."

  "Why?" she asked with concerned dismay. "The sales reps make big commissions off those accounts. That could cut a lot of salaries by more than half."

  "Our cash reserve is too low to handle the risk. If even one of those big accounts puts in a catastrophic claim, we won't be able to cover the loss."

  "Because of the embezzlement?"

  Jake hesitated. He didn't want to lie. The theft
had nothing to do with this problem. Evan's poor judgment had caused the dangerous imbalance of risk against reserve. "Evan could explain the specifics better than I can."

  She nodded, and Jake knew she assumed that Evan was more proficient in business than he. Although his ego couldn't help throbbing a little, he didn't disillusion her. He had promised Evan not to tell her about his mistakes. He couldn't break that promise. In a world where no one could be fully trusted, he and Evan had always relied on each other. He'd never knowingly hurt his twin in any way. Their bond was the one thing he'd never take lightly.

  "If we cut those large accounts," Brianna pondered, "will we have to cut jobs, too?" She asked the question in the same tone a mother might use, asking a surgeon, "Will my baby's leg have to be amputated?"

  He realized, then, the impact the possible layoffs would have on her as human resources director. She'd be trapped in the role she'd like the least—having to personally wield the ax when employees had to be dismissed. He didn't want to put her through that, but business was business. The solvency of the company hung in the balance.

  "If we cut those large accounts," he replied, carefully wording his evasion of her question, "some sales reps might choose to go with another company." Consulting his watch, he interrupted her murmurs of concern with, "It's twelve-thirty. Let's go to lunch."

  That managed to divert her. She went to get her coat.

  Jake, meanwhile, buzzed Maude. "Did that delivery arrive?"

  "Yes, sir."

  He hoped the surprise he had waiting for Brianna in the parking lot would brighten her spirits. They'd need brightening in the weeks to come.

  "What do you mean, it's mine?"

  "It's yours," Jake repeated, as if that had fully answered her question. "How do you like it?"

  Brianna gaped wordlessly at the sleek gray minivan parked in the snow-covered lot.

  "You can fit seven kids in without a problem," he pointed out as he unlocked the driver's door and gave her the keys. "Get in. Let's take her for a spin."

  Aware that others might overhear, she looked around and noticed a few of her co-workers on the sidewalk headed for the local diner. In a harsh undertone, she said, "I can't buy this car!"

  "I didn't ask you to buy it."

  "You want me to borrow it?"

  "No, not borrow. You already said you wouldn't. Think of it as a company car."

  "But it's not a company car. My position doesn't warrant one. It wasn't paid for with company funds, was it?"

  "No, but—"

  "Thanks, but no thanks." She tossed the keys to him and shoved the door closed without so much as glancing inside. Its interior would be plush, she knew. This make and model was far more expensive than anything she'd buy for herself. And he was right about the kids fitting in nicely. They'd each have a seat belt. If only she could afford to buy it herself without blowing her budget. "Take it back."

  He pocketed the keys she'd thrown him and followed her across the parking lot. "Brianna, you need a good car. This one's reliable and gets fairly good gas mileage. It's rated high for safety, and its resale value is sound."

  Afraid that co-workers might overhear, she stopped beside Evan's Mercedes. "Let's talk about this somewhere private."

  He opened her door, climbed in his side and drove down Main Street

  . "You can pick out any car you'd like. We'll drive over to the dealership now."

  "No, Jake! I won't be indebted to you."

  "Indebted to me?" He trapped her in a solemn gaze. "I didn't realize we were keeping tabs. Do I owe you for last night's supper?"

  "Don't be ridiculous. A new car isn't quite the same as chicken and rice."

  "Do you think it's harder for me to buy this car than it was for you to make supper? I probably had it easier. All I had to do is pick up the phone, sign a few papers…"

  "That's not the point."

  "Then what is?"

  She hadn't meant to hurt his feelings, but she sensed that she had. Regret filled her. But she couldn't take the car from him. It went against everything she held sacred. "If you don't want women chasing you for your money," she admonished, "you shouldn't go around buying them cars."

  He squared his jaw, pulled abruptly into a parking lot behind a restaurant and turned to her with a frown. "I don't want advice from you about women. But just to set the record straight, I've never bought a car for anyone before."

  "Then don't start now."

  "I'm not giving it to you because you're a woman, or because you're my … my lover." A warm rush went through her to hear him call her that. He himself fell silent for the space of a few stilted heartbeats. "I bought it because I care about what might happen to you without a good car."

  "I know you mean well, but I … I can't." She got out of the car, feeling the need for space.

  He soon fell into step behind her as she headed for the restaurant. Neither said a word until they'd been seated at a corner booth partitioned off by gleaming walnut walls, stained glass windows and hanging ferns.

  "If you're not going to let me buy you lunch, let me know right now," he uttered with quiet force. "You can take yours to go. I'll drive you back to the office and we can figure out how much we owe each other for the past two weeks. Divvy up expenses, estimate the value of services rendered."

  "That would be fine with me."

  "It wouldn't with me, damn it." The ferocity in his stare brought a lump to her throat. He wasn't going to understand a very important aspect of her life—her need for self-reliance, her need to remain out of any man's debt.

  "Brianna." His voice had changed, and he reached out to take her hand. "You're not about to cry, are you?"

  "Of course not." She held back the ridiculous tears with masterful control. She didn't believe he could see any more than maybe a glimmer that barely blurred her vision.

  Remorse clouded his face. He let go of her hand, which she'd kept unresponsive, and sat back in his seat with a wretched sigh. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you." He raked a hand through his hair, looking utterly despondent. "I guess I should have learned my lesson when I was ten."

  "Ten?" She couldn't help responding to that. "You tried to give a woman a car when you were ten?"

  "Not a car. Money." A self-mocking smile bent his lips. "She'd been our housekeeper since Evan and I were born. Mrs. Dimitri. My parents stayed away most of the time, and she … well, she did everything for us. She had a son our age. Cort, his name was. And a younger daughter. We ate meals together in the kitchen, joked and laughed. Fought sometimes—the four of us kids, I mean. We were like those families you see on TV." He paused, reminiscing. "Evan and I hadn't realized that our family was separate from theirs, let alone different in any way that mattered. The concept of rich and poor, employer and employee, hadn't really occurred to us yet." His mouth twisted with some remembered irony. "Then a kid at school called us millionaires. We weren't sure how to take that. I asked my father about it. He acted proud. Told me that a paltry million wouldn't make much difference to us, but to others it would mean a great deal." Jake's gaze focused on Brianna. "I told him and my mother that I wanted to give Mrs. Dimitri a million dollars."

  She easily envisioned him as an earnest ten-year-old, intent on bettering the lives of the family he'd come to love. "That was sweet of you, Jake. I doubt anyone took your request very seriously."

  "My mother did. She warned Evan and me to watch out for 'common people' who try to make you love them, because they're only after your money. She made us promise to be pleasant with the 'help,' as she called the Dimitris, but not to get too attached. The next weekend she sent us away to a friend's house. When we came home…" he paused, his lips pressed together "…Mrs. Dimitri had moved out. She'd been fired."

  Brianna's throat worked to dislodge a sudden ache. She had to hide her compassion from him. She knew instinctively that he wouldn't welcome it. As blandly as she could, she asked, "Did you see her after that?"

  He shook his head. "They packed up a
nd moved out of town, I guess." His stare slipped out of focus. "I never heard from them again."

  When the heaviest part of the silence had passed, Brianna reached for his hand and covered it. "They might have tried. Your mother might have intercepted mail or kept phone calls from you."

  He blinked, his reverie disrupted, then shrugged as if he didn't care much. "Maybe. But don't think too badly of my mother. Before that, one of the maids filed a paternity suit against my father. Tests proved he wasn't responsible, but…" Jake forced a smile "…my mother never trusted the 'help' after that. She never trusted anyone. Couldn't blame her. A family friend sold photos of my father with the maid. A tabloid paid ten thousand for the pictures. A buck's a buck."

  Brianna bit her bottom lip and looked down at her hand now clasped in his. How betrayed his family must have felt! "Your parents were killed in an accident, weren't they?"

  "A yachting accident."

  "How old were you then?"

  "Twelve."

  A ponderous silence overtook them as a waitress set menus on their table. Brianna wished she could comfort herself with the knowledge that his grandfather had been there for him. But as she thought back to her high-school friendship with Evan, she remembered that Cy had rarely been home. He hadn't known his grandsons' friends or attended school activities, as far as she could remember.

  Jake squeezed her hand. "Hey, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to ruin your lunch hour. Evan and I got along fine. We looked out for each other."

  By the way he said it, she knew how close the two must have been. That realization didn't go very far in lightening her spirits, but to please Jake she forced a smile.

  A tenderness came into his gaze that made her heart trip over itself. "I'll send the car back," he promised. "We'll forget I ever brought the subject up." He studied her eyes, a question in his. "Won't we?"

  She nodded.

  "If you want," he said in a cautious, tentative way, "you can use Evan's Mercedes while I'm gone. I've got to fly to Boston tonight and meet with another insurance company that might buy those large accounts we talked about."

  "You're leaving tonight?" She didn't know why that news surprised her. Evan had gone on business trips every few weeks; she'd come to expect them as part of their usual routine. "How long will you be gone?"