It's Bliss

by Alene Roberts

  “No.”

  “This term’s class?”

  “No.”

  “Then why would you tell me you have gained weight in both classes?”

  “Because I have. But—I’ve thought about this after we visited in your office, and I think my gaining weight in your classes doesn’t fit the usual pattern.”

  A small sigh escaped him. He said hurriedly, “May we bypass this for now?”

  “Of course.”

  He began carefully, slowly. “You all agreed with Nettie Newman that if a woman does not feel good about her appearance, it’s hard on her self-esteem, right?”

  “Right.”

  “Then the four of you all said that your weight was your greatest concern, right?”

  “Right.”

  “Then,” he took a deep breath, “may we work together on this as the first step?”

  “Yes, but it won’t do any good, and I hate to see you waste your valuable time.”

  “Why won’t it do any good?”

  “I can’t tell you why, I would have to show you why.”

  “Then you must show me.”

  “You won’t want to do what it will take to show you.”

  Sheldon was feeling warm and his tie was choking him. He loosened it, got up, and began pacing.

  “Dr. Ackerman?”

  He stopped and frowned at her. “What?”

  “Please take off your coat and tie. Sometimes, in July, the air conditioning in this big old home just isn’t adequate.”

  “I don’t feel that would be quite proper.”

  “I think it would be very proper. You’re not in the classroom. And I also think we both should dress casually during our meetings. If we’re both comfortable, we’ll be able to understand each other better.”

  He studied her, then chuckled.

  “Why are you amused? It only makes good sense.”

  “It does at that, Miss Bliss, it does at that.”

  He smiled as he took off his coat and tie and sat down again. “That feels much better, thank you. I’m ‘amused’, as you say, because I feel like I’m on a merry-go-round, and I’m wondering if I ought to close my eyes so I won’t get dizzy.”

  Billie giggled, but not knowing how to respond to this, she got right down to business. “Now, what would you like to ask me?”

  “I have no idea.”

  “Shall I coach you?”

  “Coach me?”

  “Yes. Shall I tell you what questions to ask me?”

  He gaped at her, a look of incredulity on his face. Then he smiled, the smile turning into a chuckle, the chuckle into a laugh.

  Billie smiled, glad to see her stiff and proper professor unbending a little.

  When Sheldon got himself under control, he felt a little chagrined. This was not going as he had planned. He cleared his throat, trying to resume the tenuous dignity a professor should have when working with a student. “Now, Miss Bliss, why would you have to show me? Why can’t telling me suffice?”

  She sighed in frustration. “It would not suffice. As I’ve said several times now, you would not understand.”

  Sheldon ran his hand through his hair in frustration. “Have you ever shown anyone this mysterious . . . uh, thing?”

  “After I tried to tell a few young men I dated, I tried to show them.”

  “Young men? What do they have to do with it?”

  “Everything.”

  “Uh, never mind,” he said, for fear of getting off on another confusing side road. “You say you tried to show them? Either you did or you didn’t.

  Which is it?” he asked, agitation in his voice.

  “I showed them, but they didn’t understand.”

  Sheldon was rapidly becoming more frustrated. “Miss Bliss, how then can I understand when you show me?”

  She looked at him as she considered his question. “Well, you probably won’t be able to, but I thought maybe because you’re so brilliant you just might, but . . .” she frowned as her voice trailed off. Abruptly she stood up, walked to the mantle, and rested her folded arms on it, her chin resting on her arms, her back to him. He noticed that her hair was shiny and loose down her back except for a curl resting on her right shoulder.

  While she thought about it, Sheldon waited— holding his breath.

  Her back still to him, she said, “I guess being brilliant in the dynamics of business wouldn’t necessarily help you understand this. Oh dear.”

  Sheldon was feeling the first stirring of panic. “Miss Bliss, I—”

  “Dr. Ackerman,” she interrupted, turning to face him, “are you married?”

  “Married? Uh . . . no! What does that have to do with anything?”

  “Have you ever been married?”

  “No!”

  “Oh dear.” She walked back to the couch and sat down. “Do you enjoy the company of women or would someone your age call it dating?”

  “Miss Bliss!” he exclaimed, standing up and stepping a few feet away, then pivoting around to face her. “It seems we are far afield here. What does my personal life have to do with all this?”

  “It does, Dr. Ackerman, believe me. Please answer my questions.”

  “Let’s get this straight. No! I’m not married. I have never been married.

  And what’s more, I haven’t even dated in years.”

  “Oh,” she frowned, her face full of concern. “Then I don’t know if this is going to work, Dr. Ackerman. And I’m so sorry you’ve led such a lonely life.”

  “Sorry? I didn’t ask you for . . . for sympathy concerning my personal life.” His voice had edged a decibel higher. “I just want to know, uh . . . “ He looked blank. “What do I want to know?”

  “You want to know why you would understand when I show you, when others I showed, didn’t.”

  “Oh, yes. Thank you.”

  “You might understand, but it’s likely you won’t.”

  Sheldon sat down again, baffled and worn out. “Tell me again,” he said slowly, “why you have to show me anything.”

  “Because you want to help me manage my life, starting with my weight problem, and I told you that it would be a waste of your time because—”

  “Stop! Don’t say another word. I can’t handle another explanation, if one could call it that. Just show me and we’ll see if I can understand.”

  “How much time do you have, Dr. Ackerman?”

  His patience was at the breaking point. “Enough to get this solved!”

  “Are you willing to do what it takes?”

  “What do you mean?” he asked warily.

  “I’m wondering . . .” She bit her lip, thinking. “Well, it might not look proper.”

  “I’m getting dizzy on this merry-go-round. Every time you open your mouth, I get dizzier.”

  “May I qualify something?”

  Sheldon exhaled. “If you can, Miss Bliss, without complicating it.”

  “I think I can arrange it so it will look proper.”

  “Good! Now how long do you think it will take?”

  “It may take two weeks, a month, two, who knows? Depends on your time and your ability to grasp or comprehend my problem. Then you’ll want to find a solution, and then you’ll find that—”

  “Hold it!” he exclaimed, holding both palms outward. “What if after a month, we find that I can’t even fathom your problem? What then?”

  Billie looked down at the floor, pulled her hair up off her neck thinking, then leaned back on the couch. Her arms still holding up her hair, she stared at the ceiling.

  It seemed like an interminably long time that she was frozen in this odd thinking position. He waited her out.

  Finally, dropping her hair, she sat up straight and looked him directly in the eye. “I’ll have to drop out of the program.”

  “But, Miss Bliss . . .”

  “Dr. Ackerman, I thought we four would be working with Mrs. Newman on this. I didn’t understand that you and I would start by working on my overweight
condition.”

  “The other three girls are also working on this with their individual counselors.”

  “Why is that necessary?”

  “Because,” he began, shaking his head ever so slightly, “this way you’ll get more personal attention and help. I want you four young women to succeed in the business world. And won’t, uh, feeling good about your appearance give you more confidence that you can succeed?”

  Billie studied her professor’s intense and concerned blue eyes. She leaned toward him. “I never would have guessed it, Dr. Ackerman, but you really are a kind and caring man.”

  -

  The family, who had gathered out on the back porch, were in the midst of speculating on Dr. Ackerman’s age, when Billie joined them.

  “He’s no more fifty than Billie is,” exclaimed Matilda.

  “No, he’s at least fifty-five, Tilly,” Uncle Henry countered.

  “He’s probably a very young-looking fifty,” suggested Margaret.

  Will Bliss, relaxing on a reclining lounge chair, smiled as he listened to the debate. Bill Bliss, the patriarch of the family, stated, “You’re all a little daft.

  That young man is no more than thirty-eight or thirty-nine.”

  Noticing Billie standing there smiling, her mother asked, “Oh, Billie, is your meeting over?”

  “Yes, Dr. Ackerman just left.”

  “Do you know how old he is, Billie?” asked Aunt Tilly.

  “No, just like all of you, the class is in a dilemma over it. They have even made bets on it.”

  “How often are you going to have these meetings with Dr. Ackerman?”

  her father asked.

  “It depends. The plan was to meet with our group once a week and with our individual counselors as needed. Dr. Ackerman and I will be meeting again tomorrow night, but I, uh, need to tell you something. When we four candidates met with the committee, we all agreed that our first need was to lose weight.”

  Will Bliss frowned. “Is that necessary? I thought this was a project to help you girls learn how to succeed in business.”

  “It is, Papa, but the committee feels that, in order to have confidence in our own ability to manage a business, we have to learn how to manage ourselves.”

  “That makes sense,” he conceded.

  “So, Dr. Ackerman is supposed to support and counsel me as I need.

  But,” she stopped, hesitating, knowing how her family would react, “I need to show him first, why I have, you know, that PROBLEM.”

  Mother and Aunt Tilly gasped. “Oh. Billie,” her mother began, “is that wise? Besides, dear, you really don’t have a weight problem.”

  “If you do show him, Miss Billie,” snorted Uncle Henry, “he’ll be out the door so fast, he’ll leave his long, skinny shadow behind.”

  Will Bliss and his father, Bill, exchanged glances and chuckled, knowing that the respectable and stately Dr. Ackerman was in for the ride of his life.

  Thirteen

  After showering and changing into his robe, Sheldon felt better. Relaxing in his favorite chair, he sipped a cup of cold, herb tea and wondered how soon he would be calling on Nettie’s knowledge of femininity, Robert’s knowledge of psychology, and Hal’s fatherly wisdom. He wanted to call each of them right now but felt they had already committed all the time they could.

  Besides, what could he ask? As yet, he didn’t know enough to even ask an intelligent question.

  Not knowing how much time it would take to solve the mystery of Miss Bliss’ problem, he was glad that it was summer. His class load was not as heavy. In addition to his 280 class, he only had one other class this term.

  Sheldon loved a challenge—but the kind of challenge Miss Bliss presented was more than he had bargained for. Nevertheless, it was a challenge. He sat there mentally preparing himself for what he knew was coming: more confusion, more frustration but hopefully in the end, a successful conclusion.

  He found himself actually looking forward to their next meeting tomorrow night. Not only was he feeling challenged, but his curiosity had been aroused to a fever pitch. The next get-together was to be held again at the Bliss home, where he felt comfortable. The family was warm and gracious in their hospitality and he also found them to be interesting people.

  -

  Tuesday, after her last class, Billie rented a couple of DVD’s in preparation for tonight’s meeting with Dr. Ackerman.

  Today was her birthday and her family was having the usual birthday dinner. It was not a happy occasion. She was twenty-eight years old, and what did she have to show for it? Most of her friends were married and had children, and the rest had careers. She had neither.

  Dr. Ackerman would be at the house at 7:00, and she felt far from sanguine about trying to help him understand her problem. What she was going to do tonight would only bring the PROBLEM to her mind again, and then it would happen—as it usually did. She sighed, deciding that she must find something positive about this evening other than being with her family.

  -

  At 7:00 p.m., Sheldon rang the doorbell of the Bliss home. This time it was Billie who opened the door. Her brown eyes twinkled as she looked at his casual shirt and pants.

  “Why, I was expecting Dr. Ackerman. Your name, sir?”

  He tipped his head to one side, studying her as a smile played around his lips. “And who might this audacious young woman be? Miss Bliss knows her professor well.”

  “Why, Dr. Ackerman, where have you been hiding this sense of humor?”

  “Are you going to invite me in, Miss Bliss?” he asked in mock seriousness, “or must I stand on the porch all evening?”

  She grinned. “Do come in.”

  Aunt Tilly came trotting over to them. “Good evening, Dr. Ackerman.”

  “Good evening, Matilda,” he returned, smiling.

  “We are about to cut Billie’s birthday cake. Would you like to join us for a piece?”

  A look of consternation came across his face. “Am I intruding upon your birthday, Miss Bliss?”

  “No. We’ve already had my birthday dinner with all its trimmings. Would you like a piece of cake?”

  “It’s very good— made from scratch, Dr. Ackerman,” coaxed Matilda.

  Sheldon was tempted. “I think I would, thank you, but later after we are through with our meeting.”

  Billie led him down the hall, and past the library to a room whose generous windows faced the large back porch. Under the windows stood two white, three-legged wicker planters and a rectangular one. All three were overflowing with green plants, giving the room the feel of a solarium. On one wall was an entertainment center holding a large television. Facing the television was an old and slightly worn, oversized sectional couch and one large, upholstered chair. The other two walls were covered with maps and family photos.

  Sheldon found the room comfortable and inviting.

  “I like this room,” he said.

  “We’re meeting here for a reason, Dr. Ackerman.”

  “Oh. Fine.”

  “I’m glad that you dressed comfortably tonight.”

  “Thank you.” He noticed she, too, was dressed casually. She had on a gold, cotton shirt over gold pants. He noted that the color looked very nice with her long, auburn hair, which hung loose and was slightly curled. “You also look, uh, comfortable,” he said.

  “I am. Thank you.”

  She sat down on one side of the curved couch leaving him the center section facing the television.

  He smiled. “So it’s your birthday. And how old are you today, Miss Bliss?”

  An expression of sadness came across her face so suddenly, he was alarmed. “Oh! I’m sorry. You don’t have to tell me.”

  “I don’t mind telling you, Dr. Ackerman. It’s just that I mind the age that I am. I’ve just turned twenty-eight.”

  He stared at her, openmouthed. “Twenty-eight, did you say?”

  “Yes,” she said in a small, plaintive voice.

  “Why, I thought you
were only in your early twenties.” Now it was Sheldon who looked concerned. He had just turned thirty-eight. She was only ten years younger! This was quite a few years, he realized; still, it made him feel slightly uncomfortable.

  “What is it, Dr. Ackerman? Is something wrong?”

  “Uh no, no. It’s that I . . . now can’t feel quite so fatherly toward you, knowing your age.”

  “Why? How old are you, Dr. Ackerman? Almost everyone in the class is making bet on it.”

  Sheldon was astonished. It never occurred to him that his students would be interested in his age. “I’m rather surprised at this, but you can relieve their minds. I just turned thirty-eight.”

  She grinned. “Grandpa Bliss was right.”

  Sheldon’s brows rose. “Your grandfather?”

  “Oh, yes. My family was arguing over your age last night.”

  “And you, Miss Bliss, did you bet with the rest of your classmates?” he asked, suddenly interested.

  She smiled, “No, I just found it amusing, but I was curious about something.”

  “Oh? What, may I ask?”

  “No, you may not,” she stated, chuckling to herself.

  “Well, I too, am curious about something, Miss Bliss. May I ask why you are still in school at your age?”

  A pained expression crept over her face. “Because I need to get on with a business of my own.” The appearance of concern, then confusion on Dr. Ackerman’s face propelled her to explain further. “I graduated from college in accounting when I was twenty-two and went to work with an accounting firm here in Claytonville. The situation there began to create the weight problem I have now, so I quit my job, and immediately lost weight. I then took some classes in computer science and eventually went to work for some attorneys.

  The situation was much worse there, exacerbating my weight problem even more. I quit that job, also, and immediately returned to my usual weight. I went to work for a another group of lawyers. Several weren’t married and my problem got worse. Once again, I quit, but this time I didn’t lose as quickly.”

  Seeing more confusion on his face, she asked, “Shall I go on?”

  “No! I’m thoroughly lost, Miss Bliss. Please explain what the common denominator is in all these jobs that caused you to gain weight?”