A Tale of Three Christmases

by Eva Scott

  ‘Oh, really?’ Not only had he lost control of the conversation, she happened to be irritatingly right. ‘Has anyone ever mentioned how annoying you are?’

  ‘The point is, you have to stop feeling sorry for yourself and tell her you’re not leaving until you talk it out properly. You owe it to yourself.’ Melissa pointed one manicured talon at him. He noticed the varnish had begun to chip. Somehow it warmed his heart to know that even Melissa, the most capable, efficient and perfectly groomed human he knew, didn’t have it all in hand.

  ‘Thank you for your advice.’ He gave her his best fake smile. ‘Let me say that I have no intention of taking it as it is the most ridiculous suggestion I’ve ever heard.’

  ‘Geoff …’ she began.

  ‘No, that’s enough. I am not bailing up a woman who has told me she’s not interested in a relationship, especially not after twelve months of complete silence. Why don’t you strip me naked and get me to walk down Pitt Street on a Monday at lunchtime? It’d be kinder,’ he said.

  ‘I’m not trying to be kind, I’m trying to help.’ Melissa stood up, cradling Olive, as she prepared to leave. ‘I just have one question I want you to think about, Geoff—what do you want from this life?’

  What did he want? He didn’t know. Once he would have said a family: Sunday mornings being woken by noisy children with no regard for sleep-ins, mandatory attendance at tedious school plays, long Saturday mornings spent watching kids play sport.

  As he watched Melissa with Olive, a thought began to emerge. If she could find happiness and start a family, why couldn’t he?

  He already knew exactly who he wanted to do that with.

  ‘You’re emotionally stuck, Geoff, and you’re lonely,’ Melissa continued, not noticing he was busy having a moment.

  ‘And you’re the woman to unstick me?’

  ‘Yes, I am,’ she said. ‘Someone has to. You’re in serious danger of drifting.’ She began to pack Olive’s toys into a tote bag already crammed to the gunwales with baby things.

  He winked at Olive as she regarded him solemnly over Melissa’s shoulder, as if she were assessing his new rationale. Then, with a delicate little hiccup, she threw up all down Melissa’s back.

  ‘It appears Olive doesn’t agree.’ He gave the little girl the thumbs up. ‘Nice move,’ he mouthed. She gave him a toothy smile and grabbed a handful of her mother’s hair.

  Lexie opened the overstuffed boot of her car and took out her favourite pillow and her overnight bag, and restacked the presents to get to the small insulated lunch box full of her driving snacks, which she’d accidentally packed in the back. It took three hours to drive from her farm to Bea’s house. Not that long really. Long enough to get hungry though.

  She swung the lunch box and her water bottle into the car through the driver’s window. They bounced on the passenger’s seat and wedged down between the seat and the door. She ignored them. Out on the highway she’d stop for coffee and sort it out then. Right now, if she didn’t get moving she’d miss Christmas lunch.

  After a quick check that she had indeed locked the front door, Lexie slid in behind the wheel of her car. She turned the key in the ignition, longing for a brand-new car, the kind that started with a big red button. Maybe one day. As she secured her seatbelt she thought of the goats. She hadn’t said goodbye to them.

  Scrambling out of the car, she hurried to the goat pen. Just a quick goodbye. She’d be gone overnight. The boys would only begin to notice she was missing and she’d be back.

  They bounded towards her, tails wagging in anticipation of a treat.

  ‘Sorry, lads,’ she said. ‘Nothing but a good ear scratch. Ah, there you go, Seamus … if goats could purr …’ She laughed as Taffy headbutted her hand. ‘Jealous boy.’ She swatted his roly-poly sides as he pushed his brother out of the way. ‘I’ll be gone for one night. You’ve plenty to eat if you haven’t eaten it already. Be good.’ She dropped a kiss on each goat’s nose.

  Her ears pricked up at the sound of a car pulling up to the house. ‘Who’s that? Don’t tell me it’s Marg and Bob,’ she muttered. Marg had sent her a Christmas card last week as if she hadn’t shanghaied Lexie on Christmas Day last year, embarrassed her in front of Geoff and made off with Malcolm’s ashes. Despite her annoyance, she managed a chuckle at the absurdity of it all. Her life had momentarily sounded like one of those soap operas Bea loved so much.

  Nothing anywhere near as exciting had happened over the last lonely twelve months. Geoff had left, and life had fallen into a routine. Get up, work, paperwork, bed. Repeat. Every now and again she wondered if she’d made the right choice, but she knew in the marrow of her bones that she’d made the best decision. Life alone could be tough both emotionally and physically—how she missed hugs!—but at least it was her own life.

  She rounded the shed as the dying echo of the brass door knocker sounded through the house and came to a dead halt.

  Geoff stood by the front door, one hand raised to knock, as if she had conjured him with her thoughts.

  She walked cautiously around the front, trying to process the fact he was truly there on her doorstep as if he’d never left.

  ‘Geoff?’ Her voice snagged.

  ‘Lexie?’ He turned at the sound of her voice and took a step towards her.

  ‘What are you doing here?’ She frowned, trying to understand what was happening.

  ‘It’s Christmas. I came to see you.’ He shrugged sheepishly, as if it was perfectly obvious.

  It wasn’t.

  Not in the least.

  ‘I still don’t understand.’ She stepped towards him, keeping enough distance between them to be clear where she stood on unexpected visits from ex-lovers. ‘The bed and breakfast isn’t open this Christmas.’

  ‘I know. I saw the notice on your website.’ He thrust his hands in his pockets.

  ‘Okay. So, it’s fair to say you’re not looking for accommodation then. What are you looking for?’ She crossed her arms, ready.

  ‘For you, of course.’

  ‘Of course.’ Irrational anger bubbled up within her. She felt it rise, having no idea what she was angry about. ‘You’re telling me that after twelve months of complete silence you turn up here on Christmas Day without any warning to what? Take me away?’

  The idea she might not have the right to be angry crossed her mind and she pushed it down as deep as it would go.

  ‘I wouldn’t put it like that,’ he said.

  ‘Then how would you put it?’ She put her hands on her hips.

  He hesitated, as if wondering if he’d made a mistake. Then he stepped down off the porch and began to walk towards her. She backed up instinctively until the old-fashioned door handle of her ancient car dug into her hip and she had nowhere to go.

  ‘I’d put it that I should not have left like I did. I should have stayed and talked things through.’

  ‘There was nothing to talk about,’ she muttered. ‘I called it quits and you respected that.’

  ‘Mmm … I can see how you might think that,’ he said with a smile on his face, one that said she was in trouble now. ‘But I think you called it quits, wouldn’t listen to reason and I left in a huff.’

  ‘A huff?’ She raised her eyebrows. The thought of Geoff in a huff almost cracked a smile. She refocused her anger. ‘There is nothing you could have said that would have made me change my mind. We’re too different. You need the fast-paced city life and that would kill me, like being out here all the time would smother you to death.’ She’d had twelve months to think about her reasons, study them and embed them as truth.

  He was so close now she was sure he could hear her heart thundering in her chest. The pounding in her ears was making her dizzy.

  ‘Why didn’t you let me be the judge of that?’ His honey tones were achingly familiar, provoking memories of whispered conversations in the middle of the night. She shivered.

  ‘I think the sun is getting to me,’ she said, ducking sideways and lurching towards
the house. ‘Let’s get inside where it’s cooler.’ Sweat ran down her back and her shirt stuck to her ribs.

  He followed her. She knew exactly how close he was by the degree of heat pressing against her back.

  ‘Where were you going?’

  ‘To my sister Bea’s house.’ The keys fumbled in the lock. ‘I’m expected for lunch.’

  ‘Looks like you might be late,’ he said.

  The door sprang open and Lexie made for the cool heart of the house. ‘Look.’ She turned to face him, on stronger ground. ‘I don’t know what you want from me.’

  ‘I want you to let us try again.’

  She shook her head and held up her hand. ‘No, oh no. I’m not setting myself up for failure. How long will it take before you miss your business more than you want to be with me?’

  ‘Never,’ he said with such a relaxed attitude that she wanted to throw a pillow at him.

  ‘Right, sure.’ She inched towards the couch where all the stuffed pillows sat.

  ‘I can’t,’ he said. ‘I’ve sold the lot.’

  Her hand stilled as her fingers curled around the corner of a cushion. ‘What?’

  ‘I no longer have a business to care about. All gone.’ He spread his hands wide. ‘Nothing up my sleeves.’

  Lexie blinked. ‘So, you’re unemployed?’

  ‘After a fashion. I’ve lots of money, more than I need. I sold the house as well. Liquefied everything.’

  ‘What are you going to do?’ She shook her head slowly as if she could shake all the pieces into place and make some sense of the picture.

  ‘I was hoping to move in here, with you.’

  ‘What?’ She blinked rapidly.

  ‘I let go of the city, Lexie. I don’t want that life. I want you and wherever you are is fine by me. Maybe we could even try for a family together.’

  ‘You can’t mean that.’ Everything seemed surreal and unfocused, like she was in the middle of a lucid dream.

  ‘Why not? You know I love you. Life is too short, so someone told me.’ He came closer and she let him.

  ‘You do? You never said that. The part about I love you, not the bit about life being short.’ Nerves got the better of her tongue and she stumbled over her words.

  ‘I am saying it now.’ He seemed so certain, so confident.

  ‘Are you sure?’ She fixed her eyes on the top button of his shirt—that way she could avoid the laser intensity of his eyes, which were capable of boring into her soul, or at least her heart. She took a deep breath.

  ‘I’ve never been surer of anything in my life,’ he said. ‘So what do you think?’

  He stood so close now that it would be so easy to simply step into his arms. What was stopping her from doing that? All the reasons she’d carefully tended seemed ridiculous now he was here before her. She steeled herself and looked up into his eyes and saw his love reflected there, saw her future and all the possibilities of a second chance at real happiness. In that moment, her fear receded like the tide, leaving a sense of certainty behind.

  ‘Okay.’ She nodded, unable to breathe. If she did, she’d catch the scent of him and all sensibility would be lost, and she needed just a little of that to remain standing.

  ‘I want you, Lexie. I need you like I’ve never needed anyone else. Everything I possessed, everything I was, seemed pointless if I didn’t have you. I don’t know what it is about you that draws me in, but I’m in one hundred and ten percent. I don’t have a choice. I am meant to be here, loving you. Let me prove it to you. Give me a trial.’

  She blinked, captivated by the love she could see right there on his face.

  ‘I’m useful. Good at feeding goats and not bad at marketing and paperwork too.’ He was so close now his breath mingled with hers. A spiral of desire wound around her spine from deep within. ‘I could be handy in other ways we’re yet to discover.’

  ‘But we barely know each other.’ She was clutching at straws. Taking up with a man she’d known for such a short time could be seen as madness by some.

  ‘I feel as if I’ve known you forever, and I know you feel that way too.’

  If he was determined to abandon logic, then maybe she could too. She closed her eyes, her face upturned to his … and he kissed her. His lips were soft and insistent. Her shoulders dropped and her whole body sighed as she surrendered to the blissful warmth of his arms.

  He broke contact and she gasped for air.

  ‘A trial period,’ she said, trying to salvage some composure.

  ‘You can review my performance in say, three months? See if I’m hitting my key performance indicators.’ His lips hovered over hers. She couldn’t hear a thing he was saying over the chanting in her head: kiss me, kiss me, kiss me.

  As if he could read her mind, he kissed her.

  ‘Okay,’ she said when she came up for breath. ‘Three months and then we’ll see.’ She could do three months. That’s not so long. A trial only. A tiny one.

  He slid his hands down her back until his hands cupped her bottom.

  ‘Won’t you get bored?’ She worried this was all an illusion, that he was fooling himself.

  ‘I’ve got plans to avoid boredom,’ he said. ‘Let me show you what I mean.’

  ‘Where the bloody hell have you been?’ Bea wrenched open the front door before Lexie had a chance to get out of the car. ‘You are three hours late and you’ve had your phone turned off,’ Bea roared. ‘Don’t think we saved any food for— Oh!’ She wobbled to a halt.

  ‘Hello,’ said Geoff. ‘You must be Bea. I’ve heard so much about you.’ He winked, and Bea coloured like a stop light. ‘I’m Geoff.’

  ‘Oh, God!’ Bea said.

  ‘That’s very kind. Just Geoff will do.’

  Lexie knew she shouldn’t be enjoying her sister’s discomfort this much. It was the best Christmas present ever.

  ‘Where did he come from?’ Bea hissed as Geoff made for the house.

  ‘Sydney, of course.’ Lexie played it cool.

  ‘Of course bloody Sydney. I meant how, why, what?’ She threw her hands up, talking in loud whisper mode.

  ‘He’s sold everything and he’s moving in.’ Lexie followed him into the house.

  ‘What? I thought he was your transition man, you know, shag and run,’ she muttered out of the side of her mouth as they took in the sight of Geoff introducing himself to the family.

  ‘You know what they say: if you love someone, set them free and if they’re yours they’ll come back to you.’ The torture was so sweet.

  ‘Shoot me now!’ cried Bea.

  ‘You told me to do it,’ she said.

  ‘Since when have you listened to me? You should never listen to me. And by the way, I told you to go have wild monkey sex. I didn’t tell you to shack up with the bloke.’

  ‘I don’t remember you saying anything about monkeys.’ Lexie struggled not to laugh.

  ‘I know it’s well past lunchtime and I don’t mean to be a pain, but do you have any leftovers?’ Geoff asked, his stomach growling loud enough to cause the dog to bark.

  They all laughed.

  ‘Everyone up to the table,’ said Bea. ‘We’ve been waiting for you to get here.’

  ‘I thought you said you’d eaten.’ Lexie let Bea usher her to her seat.

  ‘I thought I told you never to listen to me.’ Bea dropped a kiss on top of Lexie’s head as she sat down. ‘Geoff, dear, come sit next to me. I want to hear all about you.’

  ‘Shoot me now,’ muttered Lexie.

  Epilogue

  ‘I seriously cannot get past you. You’re blocking the way.’ Bea stood in the doorway, her family crowded behind her. ‘You will have to move that enormous belly.’

  Lexie laughed and stepped back, her hands draped protectively across her stomach in the age-old gesture of pregnant women everywhere.

  ‘Maybe you have to lose some weight, sister dear.’

  ‘Did you hear what she said to me?’ Bea turned to Charlie, her husband, bright with i
ndignation.

  ‘Hi, Lexie,’ said Charlie, ignoring Bea. ‘Pregnancy suits you.’

  ‘Thank you, Charlie. You are welcome in this house.’

  She kissed her niece and nephew as they sidled past her before thundering down the hallway to their bedroom.

  ‘Where’s the father-to-be?’ asked Charlie.

  ‘Out on the back veranda with a cold beer.’ She gave Charlie a little push. ‘Go on, Bea can unpack.’ Charlie didn’t need asking twice.

  ‘I don’t know why I bother with you,’ Bea huffed. ‘I’m accusing you of an open grab for the limelight. First widowhood, then getting married, now pregnant. It’s appalling at your age.’

  Lexie laughed, and pain shot across her stomach. She rubbed the spot, playing it cool. ‘You’re jealous because you’ve reached middle age and can’t conceal your natural boringness.’

  ‘Of course I can, it’s like covering up grey hair only you do it with something sparkly.’ She held up her hand to reveal an enormous diamond ring Charlie had given her for Christmas.

  ‘Just proves my point—you’re competing again.’ Lexie shut the front door and followed Bea inside.

  ‘You might be the oldest, but I did everything before you. Got married, had kids, bought a house …’

  ‘Got Botox.’

  ‘I’m treating that with the contempt it deserves.’ Bea sniffed. ‘My point is, I win.’

  Lexie hugged her sister awkwardly, her belly getting in the way. ‘I’m glad you’re here.’

  ‘Me too.’

  ‘I’ll go make you a drink while you unpack.’

  Lexie shuffled to the kitchen and another stab of pain robbed her of breath. She braced herself on the kitchen bench until it passed. The oven stated that the turkey still had another hour and a half to cook. It would be very inconvenient to go into labour before Christmas lunch. It was probably nothing. Maybe just some Braxton Hicks contractions or something.

  She checked the roast and made the kids and herself a drink. Geoff was in charge of the grown-up drinks and she could see Bea through the kitchen window accepting a chilled white wine. Her family had embraced Geoff with open arms, as if he’d always been one of them.