Song Of The Nightingale (DeWinter's Song 1)

by Constance O'Banyon

  “She’s very weak, Raile,” Lady Mary told him. “Why don’t you come with me, and I’ll sit with you while the doctor does what he can for her. Perhaps you would like to hold your son?”

  “Not now,” he said, brushing past her and standing over Kassidy. She was almost as white as the sheet she lay upon, and he felt his heart wrench inside him.

  “Will she live, Doctor?”

  “I will do everything I can, your grace.”

  Raile left the room and walked down the long corridor. He climbed up the stairs until he came to the winding steps that took him to the tower room. He stood at the arched window where the life-and-death struggle had taken place earlier in the day. He relived every agonizing moment in his mind. Could he have done more to save Kassidy?

  Lavinia was dead, and for that he was not sorry. Hugh had proven to have a strength of character that Raile had never imagined. His brother might not have lived a useful life, but he had died bravely. He had purposely given his life to save Kassidy and the baby, an act of sacrifice Raile had not expected. Raile felt remorse that he had not taken an interest in Hugh early on. If he had, perhaps he could have saved him from Lavinia.

  Raile bowed his head, a whispered prayer on his lips. “God, could you have given Kassidy to me only to take her away from me when I need her the most?”

  He watched as tiny splinters of light streaked through the eastern sky. With the rising of the sun came the chiming of the church bells, proclaiming that the duke and duchess of Ravenworth had a son.

  The master of the castle and of the lands as far as the eye could see, stood silently at the top of his world, in the depths of despair.

  Kassidy awoke to sunlight pouring into her bedroom. She felt so weak and seemed to ache all over when she tried to move.

  “Kassidy,” Aunt Mary said, taking her hand, “you have been asleep for hours.”

  Kassidy’s lips quivered. “I lost the baby, didn’t I?”

  “Indeed you did not. You have a wonderful son. Shall I bring him to you?”

  Kassidy felt intense joy and tried to sit up, but her aunt placed a restraining hand on her arm. “You must be very still. I’ll get your son.”

  Kassidy closed her eyes and said a quick prayer of thanks that her baby had survived the awful ordeal. She tried not to think about Lavinia and Hugh—not yet— when she was stronger perhaps she would say a prayer for them both.

  When Lady Mary returned with the baby, she held him out for Kassidy’s inspection. “Doctor Worthington says you are not to hold him yet. He is handsome, is he not?”

  Kassidy touched her son’s small hand in awe. He had black hair and dark eyes. “He looks like Raile,” she said, touching the small mouth with a kiss. “Oh, he is so dear, Aunt Mary.”

  “Indeed he is. Now this young fellow needs to eat, and you need nourishment as well. You must build back your strength.”

  “Has Raile seen the baby?”

  Lady Mary’s eyes clouded. “He is suffering a great deal, Kassidy. He blames himself for so much of what happened yesterday.”

  “But none of it was his fault.”

  “Give him time.” Lady Mary moved to the door. “After the doctor assured Raile that you and the baby were fine, he left for London. He said I was to tell you he would return as soon as he had settled some matters. He also asked if you would consider naming the baby Michael Donovan DeWinter after his father. He will be home for the christening. He said to remind you that the baby has inherited one of the DeWinters’ lesser titles and is an earl.”

  Kassidy felt a dull ache inside. “I don’t suppose Raile felt it necessary to tell me about the name himself.”

  “Sometimes men are difficult to understand, Kassidy. But I find when they are the most troubled, they pull more into themselves.”

  Kassidy wondered if perhaps Raile needed the comfort only Gabrielle Candeur could give him, but she didn’t say this to her aunt.

  Each day Kassidy grew stronger and was contented to spend her waking hours with her new son and Arrian. Arrian, of course, believed that little Michael belonged to her. She was protective and possessive of him, and Kassidy was delighted with them both.

  The sadness of Hugh’s death ebbed as sunny days blessed the land around Ravenworth. The fields were green, promising an abundant harvest. But days passed, and then weeks, and still the master of Ravenworth Castle did not return.

  Kassidy was instructing the workmen who were hanging the silken tapestries in the great hall. They had been repaired and cleaned by the women of the village, and presented to their duke and duchess as a gift of gratitude.

  Kassidy moved forward to examine the lady and the unicorn, which was her particular favorite.

  “Elspeth, I cannot tell where it has been repaired. They did wonderful work. I was told by Mrs. Mayhew that it had been a labor of love. Isn’t that a dear thing for her to say?”

  “I’m certain she spoke the truth. For they all love you, Kassidy,” said a deep, familiar voice.

  Kassidy spun around to find Raile behind her. Her heart was throbbing with excitement that quickly turned to anger. “So, your grace, you have come home.”

  He feasted his eyes on her, thinking she had never looked lovelier. “Yes,” he said at last. “I have come home.”

  “And did you find Miss Candeur to be in good spirits?” She was sorry as soon as the words left her lips.

  His pupils dilated. “I did see Gabrielle, Kassidy. I’m telling you this only because you have questions about her, and I don’t want there ever to be any misunderstanding between us.”

  Kassidy thought perhaps it would not hurt so much if he were a little less honest. There was ice in her voice. “Do you like the tapestries, Raile?”

  “Indeed. I was told you had sent them to a woman in the village, but I had little hope they would come back looking so fine. I’m glad they were restored.” He gripped her shoulders and turned her to face him. “You have put my house in order, taken care of my villagers, and my servants adore you.”

  Her eyes were burning. “You forgot to add that I have given you the son and heir you craved.”

  “Yes, you have done that also.”

  “I don’t understand you, Raile. You seemed to want a son desperately. Then when he was born, you left for London and ignored him completely.”

  Mockery played in his dark eyes. “Are you chastising me, madame, for being neglectful of my duty?”

  She was embarrassed and lowered her gaze. “I would not like to think so, Raile. But perhaps I have turned into a shrewish wife.”

  His lips twitched in a smile. “If it is my fate to have a shrewish wife, then so be it.”

  She turned away from him and walked to the second tapestry with the pretense of examining it, when in truth all she could think of was him. Her whole body came alive when he was near.

  “I had dinner with your Aunt Mary and Uncle George last night. They send their love.”

  “I ate alone last night,” she said, feeling the anger building inside her.

  He took her arm and steered her down the hallway. “I have something to say to you, Kassidy. I believe the time has come for the two of us to talk about our future.”

  So, she thought, the time had come at last. He had his son, now he wanted her to leave so he could have his freedom. The ache inside was deeper than anything she had thus far experienced.

  Would he expect her to leave Michael? That had been their bargain, but she hadn’t thought about the baby at the time, or known how much she was going to love him. To leave her husband and her son would tear her heart out.

  Raile seated her in the oversized chair, while he perched on the edge of his desk. She looked up at him expectantly. “Today is the day of reckoning, Raile. I already know what you want to talk about.”

  “Do you, Kassidy? Then perhaps you can tell me how to say what I want to say to you.”

  “You might want to start with the London house. I know you said I could live there, but I would prefer
not to. I believe I shall travel abroad for a time.”

  He stood up, and she followed him with her eyes. Raile was everything a woman could desire. He was generous, compassionate, and handsome. He could charm her with a smile, or send her heart racing with a glance. She saw him as her champion who had helped her as a girl, she saw him as the father of her son, and the husband who had held her in the night to keep her from having bad dreams. But he had never belonged to her, and she must let him go.

  Raile poured two glasses of brandy and handed one to Kassidy, but she shook her head. He tossed his down his throat and turned back to her.

  “I needed that to get through the next few moments.”

  “There is nothing that should cause you concern, Raile. I remember well the pact we made before our marriage. I’m willing to stand by our agreement.”

  He looked into her eyes as if searching for something. “Are you saying you can leave our baby?”

  She would not cry, she would not show weakness, but oh, yes, it would be so painful to leave her son.

  “I am prepared to stand by our agreement, Raile.”

  He inhaled slowly as the pain of loss cut through his heart. “I had hoped if I stayed away long enough, you would become attached to the baby and would be unwilling to leave him.”

  Kassidy twisted her hands in her lap. “Do you say this to torture me, Raile?”

  He moved away from her and sat down at his desk. “I can tell you something about torment, Kassidy.”

  “I know you can, Raile. I can imagine what it feels like to be married to someone while loving another.”

  He looked taken aback, but quickly recovered. “Are you speaking of me?”

  “I know how you feel about Miss Candeur.”

  He pressed his hands together and braced them on his desk. “I doubt that you do, Kassidy. When I said I had seen Gabrielle, I didn’t tell you why. Perhaps I should.”

  “There is no need, Raile. I have always known how you feel about her.”

  “Kassidy, did you hear Lavinia when she taunted me about having Gabrielle come here?”

  “I didn’t hear her say that.”

  “You were otherwise occupied. But to get back to Gabrielle. When she came to Ravenworth, she thought I had sent for her. She had received a letter which she thought was signed by me.”

  “Oh.”

  “Exactly. Lavinia was the author of the letter.”

  “Poor woman. She was so demented.”

  “Back to Gabrielle, Kassidy,” Raile continued. “That day pity was all I felt for her because she had been ill-used by Lavinia. I suppose I also felt guilty because I ended my association with Gabrielle after you and I were married, in a very cowardly way. I allowed her to learn from others that I had married you. I’m not proud of that.”

  “You ended your affair with her after we were married?” She looked at him in surprise. “I thought you loved her.”

  “No. I never loved her, Kassidy. But so there will be no misunderstanding, I want you to know that I am paying her bills and making arrangements for her return to France. It is out of compassion, Kassidy, and nothing more.”

  “Yes, I have known you to be a very compassionate man.”

  He smiled, and then laughed aloud. “In my arrogance, I offered you compassion. I thought in marrying you, I had saved you from a solitary life, when in truth you could have any man you wanted. Can you ever forgive a fool?”

  She stared at him, not in the least amused. “It appears you have done your duty by everyone, Raile. You saved me from a life of loneliness, you saved Miss Candeur from humiliation, you even saved Arrian from an orphanage. Sainthood appears to be your lot in life.”

  Raile realized he wasn’t doing well in explaining his intentions. “You might like to know I’ve confirmed that Hugh married Abigail, and Arrian can rightfully take the DeWinter name.”

  “Well, Raile, it seems you have your well-ordered life, after all.”

  “Not entirely, Kassidy,” he said ruefully. “Not where you’re concerned.”

  “I’m your wife. All you have to do is tell me what you require of me, your grace, and I’ll do your bidding.”

  He rolled his eyes upward. “Would that it were true.”

  “No man will ever control me, Raile. You should know that by now.”

  He was reminded of the day she had brought Arrian to him and had faced him in defiance. “In this room, we first met, Kassidy. Had I known what was in store for me, I wonder if I would have fled from you.”

  “You would have been wise to, Raile. But to say we first met in this room is not altogether true, is it? We met in the park when I was only a child.”

  “So we did. The pity was in forgetting that. But you were so young that day.”

  “And you were so sad.”

  “I still am, Kassidy.”

  She glared at him. “Except for our son, it would have been better for us both if we had never married.”

  There was pain in Raile’s eyes, and he was quiet for a moment as he walked over to her and pulled her to her feet. “As you know, Kassidy, in the beginning, I put little importance on marriage.”

  “You made that very clear to me. I married you, knowing we would not always live together.”

  “Please, just listen to what I have to say.”

  She looked at him, her heart breaking, wishing he did not feel bound to utter the words that would tear her heart out. “Very well, I’m listening.”

  “I have come to believe, Kassidy, that if a man has a wife who just happens to have the greenest eyes he has ever seen . . .”He reached out to gather a handful of silken hair that felt alive in his hands. “And if her golden hair rivals the setting sun on a summer’s evening...” He laced his hands through her hair and brought her face closer to his. “Add to that she is loyal, generous, and loving. And if she has a temper that rises like a live volcano and a forgiving nature that can calm a man like a tranquil sea at low tide. If she’s stubborn and always speaks her mind...” His eyes closed for a moment before he continued, “then a man can count himself fortunate indeed.”

  His chest expanded with unbearable pain, fearing she would not have him. “I ask you, Kassidy, would a man toss away such a rare and precious jewel?”

  She stared into his eyes, hoping she had heard him right. “Are you saying you like being married to me?”

  He pulled her head to rest against his shoulder, wanting to hold her like that forever. “I have been in torment while I was away from you. I have grown accustomed to seeing you every day. I have never missed anyone since my mother died, Kassidy—but I hungered for the sight of your face, the sound of your laughter, the feel of your hand in mine.”

  Her eyes rounded with hope and wonder. “Raile, I—“

  “Please forgive me, Kassidy,” he interrupted her, afraid if he didn’t finish what he had to say, he would be unable to continue. “You see, I have never loved a woman before you, and I don’t know how to act with you. I know I did everything wrong.”

  She stepped back, her heart beating with hope. “You love me, Raile?”

  He smiled down at her. “I am most irreversibly in love with you, my little wife.”

  “But you said you would never—“

  He placed his finger over her mouth. “I said many foolish things, Kassidy. I hope you will be generous and not remind me of them too often.”

  She touched his cheek softly, as doubt filled the green eyes that were swimming with tears. “Oh, Raile, I cannot believe you could love me. I have been nothing but trouble to you.”

  His lip curved into a smile. “I won’t deny that. Since the moment I’ve known you, you have turned my world upside down.” Then he became serious, his eyes searching hers. “Kassidy, I wonder if you would allow me to break another promise to you?”

  Happiness was bursting forth within her. She wanted to press her body against his and allow his nearness to fill her whole being.

  “Which promise, Raile?” she asked softl
y.

  “The one where I promised you your freedom if you gave me a son.”

  Her green eyes took on the glow of a siren. “Just you try to send me away, Raile. Everywhere you go, I will be one step behind you.”

  “I have not always treated you well.”

  “That is not so, Raile. Each time I have been in trouble, it has been you who stood beside me and made everything right again.”

  There was triumph in his eyes and he picked her up in his arms and carried her to the French doors and out into the garden. “You are fixed to me now, Kassidy. I’ll never let you go.”

  Were the ghosts of past DeWinter wives glancing down at her from the high turrets of the castle and shaking their heads in satisfaction—she felt as if they were. Kassidy pressed her cheek to his while happiness filled her mind. “Oh, Raile, my love, my love, why would I want to leave paradise?”

  He bent his dark head and lightly touched his mouth to hers. She melted against him and thus they stood locked in each other’s arms until at last he pulled away.

  He laid his rough cheek against hers. “You have allowed me to live again, and to believe that things such as love and honor still exist.”

  At that moment, a bird took flight from a nearby thicket, and Kassidy followed it with her eyes, her heart soaring as if it had also taken wing. She looked up to find Raile smiling at her, for he, too, had seen the nightingale.

  “Look.” Raile pointed to the tall oak that shaded the far end of the garden. “The male waits for her just there on the highest branch—do you see him?”

  “Yes, I see him,” Kassidy said, as Raile enfolded her in his arms, crushing her against him.

  “Listen, my love,” Raile whispered against her ear, “do you hear him singing to his mate?”

  “Yes, Raile, I very definitely hear the nightingale sing to his lady love.”

  He turned her to face him, his dark eyes warm and soft with intense longing. “The nightingale sings for us also, Kassidy.”

  She pressed her head against his chest, hearing the thundering of his heart. “I know that, too, my dearest.”

  Kassidy could say no more, because the sweet song of the nightingale echoed in her ears as her husband’s lips pressed against hers. And soon, even the nightingale’s song was drowned out by the beating of the lovers’ hearts.