“It was all a ploy to get you to carry me home,” she replies with sass to her tone. “I didn’t want to walk anymore.”
Rolling my eyes, I shake my head at her. I swear, this chick’s gonna hurt my head.
Today’s the day we’re going to ride an elephant. Nicki and Mike are meeting us there. I could tell by the excitement in her voice when I called to ask that they’re looking forward to being part of this.
I’m walking over to Elijah’s place, ‘cause I figure it’ll be easier for him if we leave from there instead of him coming to pick me up. It’s an unusually warm day today, well, more so than normal.
Reaching Elijah’s place, I knock on the door and Mrs. Turner answers. She takes me in, and smiles. “Becky. How are you, darling?” his mom asks, pulling me in for a hug.
“I’m well, Mrs. Turner. How are you?”
“Great. Come in. Elijah’s getting changed so he won’t be long.”
I’ve never been inside Elijah’s place before, I never expected it to be so modern and nice. It looks like it’s been updated, with nice colors on the walls, and vibrant new furniture. I look around and my eye goes over toward the kitchen where there’s a set of prints all lined up. My feet automatically take me directly there, my curiosity getting the better of me.
I notice I’ve entered the kitchen and the moment I walk into it, a strong aroma of caramel hits me. “Yum, what’s that?” I ask Mrs. Turner, turning to look at her.
“It’s my new candle. Caramel Supreme.” She points over to a glass stand a few inches high with a burning candle on it.
Suddenly I feel guilty because I’ve walked in here and made myself at home. Hanging my head, I close my eyes and take a deep breath. “I’m sorry, ma’am. I’ve lost my manners. I saw those frames on the wall and I just wanted to look at them.” I swallow the nervousness sitting in my throat. “May I?” I ask, finally getting my manners in check.
She smiles at me then winks. “Please.” She gestures for me to go ahead.
Turning, I look at the frames. Four out the five all have Elijah’s name and how old he was when his hands were dipped in paint and placed on the paper. “Oh my God, that is one of the cutest things ever,” I say smiling as I make my way down the paintings. When I get to the last one, the smile on my face drops, as do my shoulders. “Oh crap,” I whisper. The name ‘Gabrielle Faith Turner’ is on the bottom, and I quickly work out she was six days old when she passed away. “I’m sorry,” I say to Mrs. Turner.
Turning to look at her, I can see she has tears threatening to spill over. “She’ll always be here.” She lifts her hand to clutch her chest.
God, I can relate so much to her. My Mom and my best friend have both died. It’s hard to say they’ll be in your heart, especially given the fact I’m never going to see them again. “I know.” Man, I wish I didn’t come in here now. But this is something about Elijah I never knew. He had a sister.
We’ve both suffered so much loss, it’s difficult to find the courage to go on.
But today that’s exactly what we’re doing, we’re going on.
“Hey,” Elijah enters the room and looks straight at me, then at his mom. “What’s going on? You both look so pale. Are you okay?” he addresses us both. “What’s happened?” He moves over to his mom and gives her a hug.
“We’re being emotional,” she responds and gives him a kiss on the cheek, before pulling away and wiping it off with her thumb. Elijah screws his face up in a somewhat ‘eww’ way. “Sorry, I’ve embarrassed you.”
“It’s all good, Mom.”
It’s cute how they are. He may have screwed his face up when his mom kissed him, but his body language says how much he loves the affection she’s giving him. I bet he’s a cuddler.
“You ready to go?” I ask.
“I am.” He grabs his keys off the kitchen counter top and gives his mom a quick peck before we leave. Aww . . . how cute.
“I’m not sure if I’ll be home for dinner.”
“Becky, you’re more than welcome to stay for dinner if you kids get back in time.”
“Thank you,” I say as we head out. When we get out to his car, he runs ahead and opens my door for me. “Ah, you know this isn’t a date?” I ask once we’re both seated inside.
He lifts an eyebrow at me and his mouth down turns in disgust. “I can still be a nice guy,” he replies. “But hey, if you want to open your own door, then sure thing. Duly noted. And by the way, my car doesn’t have central locking, which means if it’s raining you have to wait for me to get in first then I’ll reach over and open your door.”
Smartass. “Let’s not take this too far. You can open my door.”
“Nah, not now.” He pulls into the street, being incredibly cautious of the non-existent traffic.
“I may have overreacted.”
“You don’t say,” he teases and quickly glances at me.
Rolling my eyes, I lean over to turn the radio on. When I find a song I like, I sit back in my seat and watch as we make our way through town and toward the animal park.
“Thanks for driving,” I say to Elijah.
“Have you got your license yet?”
“Yeah, I got it a couple of months ago. A little while after Alice’s . . .” I pull myself up and don’t say the word. “You know,” my voice goes small.
“It’s okay. Actually, it’s getting easier.”
“How so?”
“It still hurts, and I miss her like crazy, but my heart’s slowly mending.” Man, what vulnerable words. Raw. Pure.
“I wish I could say the same.” A humorless chuckle escapes from deep inside me. “Not a day goes by where I don’t catch myself having a conversation with her. It’s like she’s still here.” I stop talking, my body is already reacting to the sadness. I fight hard so I don’t let my tears fall. “Do you think it’ll ever get to the point where it doesn’t hurt as much? I mean, will I be able to go through a day where it doesn’t feel like my heart’s been ripped out and stomped all over?” I notice Elijah’s going even slower than before. He’s reduced the speed so much he’s almost crawling. “Dude, if you drive like an old man, you should be wearing one of those bowler hats.”
Elijah chuckles, and speeds up. He remains quiet for long moments and when we get on the interstate he starts to talk. “I think one day we’ll both be able to breathe again.” Whoa. Intense. “And I’m hoping we’ll be able to go a day without it hurting.”
“Yeah,” I say as I look out the window again and totally tune out to everything else. Instead my thoughts go to Alice. As much as I want today to be a great day, I’m struggling to keep my emotions in check.
Keeping my head turned, I watch as we turn off the interstate and go through several towns before we get to our destination. The mood is heavy, just like my heart.
“We’re here,” Elijah announces. He parks the car, and gets out to meet me around the front. “Hey,” he says when he notices how down I am. “This is a good day, something Alice wanted to do. So we’re doing it for her.” He steps closer, and embraces me in a tight hug. “This is for her.”
God, he feels good. He’s so comforting and caring and I love how he knows when my emotions are playing havoc. “I know.”
We hear a beep, and turn to see Mike and Nicki looking at us, both with huge smiles on their faces. It’s in that second I remember I’m in Elijah’s arms and step back as fast as I can. “Oh my God, they’re going to think you and I are together. They’re going to hate me.” My hand goes to my neck as I feel heat quickly rising through me.
“They’re not going to hate you.”
“Yes, they are,” I hiss. “They’re going to think their daughter hasn’t even been gone for a year and I’m moving in on her guy.” God, I’m so ashamed of myself. Burying my face in my hands I turn in an attempt to hide away from them.
Elijah moves in front of me. I know it’s him, I can sense him. He runs his palms up and down my arms and tries to pry my hands away from my face. �
�Don’t do this, Becky. They won’t be thinking those thoughts at all. They’ll see I’m comforting you, and I think they’ll like the fact we have each other to lean on.”
“They won’t,” I cry through my hands. “They’re going to hate me.”
I feel another hand on my back. Nicki rubs circles around with the lightest of touches. “I won’t think anything bad of you at all, Becky. If you and Elijah were to get together, I think Alice would be looking down at you both and smile.”
Oh God, her words cause that hole in my heart to gape even larger. Gathering all my strength, I lower my hands and wipe at my eyes. “Thank you,” I turn to say, and fling my arms around her waist to hug her. “But just so we’re clear, we’re not together. He’s kinda too annoying for me.”
Nicki laughs, and Elijah lets out a groan. “Gee, thanks,” he sarcastically replies.
I smile over at Elijah, and try to convey to him with my eyes that he’s now kinda like my best friend. He and I are growing closer with every day passing, and I like the fact we’re here to lean on each other.
We’ve come to learn our elephant’s name is Maya. She’s an Asian elephant, and they have smaller ears, are not as wrinkly as African elephants and they live to be around fifty years old.
“Maya is nineteen years old, and she can be quite mischievous, but she loves people.” Her handler holds out his hand and offers her a treat.
“She’s so regal,” Nicki whispers in my ear. “Isn’t she beautiful?”
“I know. I’m unbelievably excited to ride her.”
Maya’s handler keeps talking to us, and tells us a few more facts before asking Maya to sit so we can climb on top of her. “Is it safe for her to have us on her back?” Mike asks, skeptical of the harm we may bring Maya.
“Maya will love it. And she can take more weight, though we never give her more than two grown adults. It’ll be easy for her,” he reassures us. We spend some time with Maya, familiarizing her with us, feeding her small treats from the palm of our hands. The handler explains we’ll be riding her bareback because it’s safer for Maya, and more comfortable for her too.
When the time comes, Mike and Nicki climb on her first, being careful not to hurt her in any way. Elijah and I stand back and watch as Maya rises slowly; the smiles on Mike’s and Nicki’s faces are enough for me to see how much they are enjoying this.
“We should share a meal with them once a week,” I say to Elijah as Maya is led on a path through some trees by her handler.
“What?” Elijah asks, his nose screwed up. “Who are you talking about?”
“Mike and Nicki. We promised Alice we’d look after them, and we haven’t been doing a very good job at that. I think once a week we should have a meal with them. And try to get them to do some things on the list with us.” As Maya slowly disappears between the tall trees, Nicki turns and waves to us. Mike says something to her, and she breaks into a laugh, but continues waving to us. “Can you see how happy she is?”
“I can,” Elijah’s voice sounds defeated, as if he was fighting it. I turn to look at him, and although he’s smiling, his eyes aren’t.
“Are you okay?” I ask.
He takes a deep breath, and with his eyes trained on Nicki, he nods his head. “Yeah, I’m good.”
God, he looks so sad. Stepping closer to him, I slide my arm around his waist and he slings his arm over my shoulder. Today’s an emotional day. We’re doing something for Alice, and it’s affecting us all.
We don’t say anything else as we watch Nicki and Mike ride on Maya. But once their ride comes to an end, my heart beats frantically against my rib cage. Suddenly, I’m nervous about our turn on Maya.
The handler brings the beautiful, big elephant back to the start of the route and asks her to kneel down. Nicki and Mike both look at us, then to each other, and smile. She leans in and whispers something to him and he nods. The moment they’re off, Nicki makes her way over to me. “You two are going to love it.”
“She’s such a gorgeous animal. But I’m kinda nervous,” I reply.
“There’s nothing to be nervous about. She’s gentle.” Nicki moves in to hug me, and then the handler calls us over for our turn.
“Here we go,” Elijah mumbles.
We sit on Maya and it’s the weirdest sensation ever. She’s huge. I mean she’s twice my height and weighs so much. She’s hard, yet her skin is tough and soft at the same time. The handler gives her the command to get her up, and I start freaking out when she rises slowly.
“Oh my God,” I squeal in excitement.
“Are you okay?” Elijah asks from behind me.
Maya starts walking the same path she walked with Nicki and Mike. She’s so careful and slow, but it does nothing for my roughly pounding heart and shaking hands. I know Maya’s not going to break into a run, but her sheer size is terrifying in the most awesome of ways.
“I’m freaking out that I’m going to fall,” I say to Elijah.
Suddenly, he shifts closer to me and slides his arms around my waist. His front is to my back, warming me with his body heat. “I’ve got you. I’d never let you fall,” he says as he tightens his arms around me.
My stomach flips, then flops, then flips again. Shit, I shouldn’t like him holding me like this, his body close to mine, his chest against my back. Heating me, sending a shiver up my spine . . . crap.
I hold in my breath, not wanting to breathe in his spicy aftershave. Shit, Becky . . . stop it. You can’t smell his aftershave, stop it! Yes, I can. I can smell him, and boy, does he smell good. Stop it, Becky. He’s Alice’s boyfriend. I shouldn’t be effected by him, he’s just Elijah.
Oh God. I’m going mad. What the hell’s going on with my head?
“Are you having fun?” he leans in to ask me.
Crap . . . he smells so good. “Yep,” I respond in a squeaky voice. Get it together, Becky.
“What’s wrong?” he whispers in my ear.
Shit, I feel so guilty. Sisters before misters. “Nothing.” I turn to look at him over my shoulder, and his face is right there. Damn it to hell. He’s gray eyes have specks of dark brown in them, giving them so much depth. My gaze flickers down to his lips, and the crazy in me wants to lean back to give him a small kiss. I only want our lips to meet, nothing gaudy and full on, just a small, sweet peck.
I can hear Alice’s voice in my head, ‘Do it.’
I can’t do it, I think to myself.
“Do what?” Elijah asks.
Shit, I obviously didn’t think it, I said it. “Nothing,” I offer him a weak smile and turn forward again. My body becomes rigid and I try to shift forward so I can’t feel his body against mine. If he knew, he’d be thinking I’m a bitch because I’m developing feelings for him. I can’t allow that to happen. I don’t want to lose him as a friend, or the connection we share.
Instead, I concentrate on Maya, and how carefully she walks down the track.
I try to push him to the back of my mind, and not focus on the delicious scent floating through the air to me.
Maya stops suddenly, lifts her trunk and makes an awfully loud sound. “What’s going on?” Elijah shouts to the handler.
He walks around the side, and looks behind us. “Maya is . . . well . . .” He looks behind us again.
We both turn to see what’s happening, and instantly regret it. “Oh my God,” Elijah yells.
Holy shit. The smell is enough to make me gag. “I’m gonna hurl,” I say as I face forward.
“Maya is shitting. Literally,” Elijah manages to say through his laughter.
Smacking my palm to my forehead, I begin to laugh at the entire scenario. I was focusing on something other than what I should’ve been. And Maya not so gently reminded me this is about Alice and her bucket list, not my stupid hormones trying to move in on my best friend’s guy.
“Oh my God,” I say as I pinch my nose and close my mouth. “That smell is revolting. What do you feed her?” I rhetorically ask the handler, gagging at the smell com
ing through my closed mouth and nose.
Maya finishes her business, and keeps on walking the path. “Is that not the strangest thing ever? She takes a dump and keeps going like there’s nothing to it?” Elijah asks.
Thankfully, that smell is diminishing, because I’m not sure I’d be able to handle smelling it for too much longer.
“What do you want her to do? Wipe her butt?” I ask.
Elijah laughs, and his arms around me tighten. And just like that, I’m reminded of the tension I’m feeling toward him. But no, I’m not going to react. Instead, I’m going to enjoy the rest of the ride.
“How about we stop off and get some lunch?” Mike offers when we get back to the car.
I can see in his eyes and Nicki’s how happy they both are. It makes me feel so good to know they’re smiling over doing something on Alice’s bucket list with us.
“Yeah, I’m starving,” Elijah says and rubs his stomach. “You hungry?” he turns to me to ask.
“I can eat.”
Elijah turns back to Mike and Nicki. “We’re in. But I have no idea where to go.”
“Follow us, there’s a place we used to come to with Alice,” the moment Mike speaks the words, his face falls. But man, I give him credit, because he picks himself right up and smiles at us.
By the way Elijah shifts, I can tell he notices it too. “We’ll follow,” Elijah says as he heads toward his car. This brings Mike back to the here and now. He grabs Nicki’s hand and gets into their car.
When we get in Elijah’s car, the air around us crackles with awkwardness. Damn it, Becky, what are you doing? “Maya is such a beautiful creature,” I say attempting to break the icy tension.
Elijah seems weird too. He’s sitting up straight in his seat, not as relaxed as normal. He’s right over, as far to the other side as possible. Yeah, I get it. He’s not interested in me, and that’s cool. I’ll get over these stupid feelings fluttering around inside of me.
“She’s gorgeous,” he says in an even tone.
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