Waterborn (The Emerald Series Book 1)

by Kimberly James

  Then his eyes shifted to me, where I stood rendered immobile by the impossibility of the situation, faced with the two men who impacted my life in drastically different ways. Drawn to both of them for completely different reasons. My father was right, I didn’t have a choice about the connection we shared, but I did have a choice whether to make him a part of my life. It was just a choice I wasn’t ready to make yet and might not be for a long time.

  His eyes fell on me again and with them a wind that blew gently, touched every part of me then died—a silent goodbye. A reminder of what was between us. Without another word he turned for the water and on a dive, he was lost in the dawn light and the wavering shine of the water.

  My dad sucked in a harsh breath, shaking his hand to throw off the sting. “Shit, that hurt.”

  “Do you feel better?” My heart still hammered in my throat.

  “Yes,” he said. “I’ve fantasized about doing that for a very long time.”

  I sighed, running a hand over my hair, and realizing I still held the necklace, I denied the relief I felt. “I’m sorry. To see him, it must bring back so many bad memories.”

  “I knew I would have to face him eventually and it was long past due that I deal with it, that I deal with him.”

  “I’m sorry, Dad. I tried to hate him.” Honesty was necessary at this point. I had no room for anything else. “But I can’t.”

  “I have to tell you, your mother never did either. He hurt her, he disappointed her, but she never hated him. Especially after you were born.” He sighed, reaching to wipe a strand of hair off my lip. “Hate is an exhausting and unproductive emotion. I should know. I’ve lived with it long enough. I’ve harbored enough for both of us.”

  The admission caught me off guard. I’d never thought of my dad as anything but loving and kind-hearted. He put his hands on my shoulders, his eyes tender.

  “I will respect the decisions you make about that part of your life,” he said, his smile wistful. “And I thought we agreed to no more sorries? That was two for you.”

  “I’m glad my mother picked you,” I said.

  “Me too.”

  I hooked my arm around his waist as we fell into step on our way back to the house. Morning light filtered down on us like a new promise.

  “And you know we have that thing today. Flattery won’t get you out of it.”

  I groaned into his shoulder, that thing being my tour of the high school. “Do I have to?”

  “Yes,” he said, kissing the top of my head. “But if you absolutely hate the idea after we’ve looked, we can talk about other options.”

  Up in my room, I sat on the edge of my bed, my mother’s image smiling back at me. I stared at it a long time before I lay the necklace back where my father had left it for me.

  Thirty

  Noah

  Black rubber burned into my skin with each flip of the tire. I grunted with effort, ignoring the beady-eyed curiosity of the five seagulls following my progress. I’d spent so much time on this beach with my brother, I could imagine hearing his voice in the wind, pushing me harder, pushing me to be better. Always one more rep to do, always farther to go. I’d probably flipped this damn tire a mile, and still it wasn’t enough.

  I abandoned the tire and tacked on a five mile run. Nothing like forcing your body to its physical limits and stripping down to the guts of your soul to find some mental clarity. I’d been doing this every afternoon for a week and I still didn’t have it.

  Not that I hadn’t found contentment. I had. I was more than content; I was happy. But ever since losing Caris’s Song I had felt a gnawing lack of purpose and direction.

  By the time I was done, my mouth and throat felt like I had eaten a bag of cotton. The water called to me, a promise of relief. I was about to immerse myself when I spotted Marshall walking toward me. He had on a pair of khaki shorts and a short-sleeved button up shirt. Overdressed for around here. He tossed me a bottle of water.

  “How did you know I was out here?” I had come back to the beach behind the Facility seeking the solitude it offered.

  “Caris was at the house. She and Erin were about to go shopping for school stuff and she mentioned you’d been coming out here.”

  Caris had decided to enroll for her senior year, and I was glad she and Erin would have each other. She hadn’t given up hope that I would finish with her.

  Misery loves company.

  It had to be upwards of ninety degrees without a stir in the air and Marshall wasn’t even sweating. I’d never figured out how he was able to pull off that cool-as-a-cucumber look in the dead of summer. For a lander he was in good shape, lean and ripped, and in top-notch physical condition. It reminded me of the first time I had met him, seeming all cool and shit. Sixteen years old and having lost my dad two years before, I had been looking for a replacement, someone to look up to, and Marshall had fit the bill.

  “So what’s up? You obviously didn’t come all the way out here to workout with me.”

  “Not hardly. I could never keep up with you boys.” He dug his hands into his pockets. “Mr. Harrison dropped the charges against Sol. Evidently Athen Kelly cut a deal with him. Sent Sol packing. Banished him from the coast for the foreseeable future.”

  “You won’t hear me complaining about that,” I said. And really, I wasn’t surprised. Banishment was typical punishment when someone in the tribe committed an offense. Not that it happened much, but when it did, tribe-imposed exile was the normal consequence.

  “You want to speculate on why, after nearly two decades of living in relative obscurity, Athen Kelly decides to rear his head out of the water?”

  “Nope.” Pretty sure I knew the answer to that one. Same reason I had been called back from the Deep. Same reason Sol decided to stir the waters and force a confrontation.

  Caris.

  Same reason, entirely different motives. My motives were pretty straight up. I loved her. Sol, on the other hand, saw her as an opportunity. As for Athen Kelley, his motives might be a bit more complicated. I sensed he was thinking about what might have been. Caris gave him a chance to right a wrong. Her presence was a catalyst for hope, the reinstating of something so many of us thought lost. Hell, even I was restless thinking about the future mainly because she made me see one.

  “That’s not why I’m here, though. Got a favor to ask.” He pulled what looked like some kind of GPS device out of his pocket.

  “What kind of favor?”

  “Eight-year-old kid missing off a deep-sea charter. Called in about an hour ago. No one saw him go over but there’s a cushion missing from the boat. Search is underway, figured you might want to help out.”

  “Saving the world was Jamie’s job. I don’t know if I want it to be mine,” I offered, a token resistance at best. Marshall knew damn well I’d go look for the boy. I just needed him to know I wasn’t Jamie. That I might want to do things a little bit differently. Because I knew if I took that device, I was taking on more than finding some poor kid.

  “No one’s asking you to save the world, Noah. It’s just one eight-year-old kid in the water and a family that wants him back.”

  I met Marshall’s gaze through his sunglasses. Of course, all I could see was a reflection of myself in the dark lenses. Saw myself take the device out of his hand and string it around my neck.

  He offered general directions, approximate coordinates of the boat, which didn’t mean a whole lot to me. I found it easier for him to just point his finger and say “that way.” I had my own ways of finding things that didn’t belong, and they didn’t involve technology, just good old-fashioned instinct.

  It took me all of twenty minutes to find him, about a mile outside of what would have been their search radius, and by the looks of him, he’d been out here a while. Stupid landers. He wasn’t even wearing a life vest. Legs dangling under the flotation device in a pair of geometric print shorts bright enough to see from hundreds of yards away. No signs of injury from my viewpoint. I surfaced in front
of him, easing my head out of the water slowly, knowing I was probably going to scare the crap out of him. He had his head down and his eyes were in the process of drifting closed.

  “Hey, buddy. What you doing out here all by yourself?”

  He lifted his tear-streaked face off the cushion and stared at me with dark eyes, hazy with fatigue. “I fell.” His small voice quivered.

  “I heard about that. You okay? You hurt anywhere?” I took a quick visual survey. He shook his head, fists clenched around the straps of the cushion so tight his fingers were white and rubbed raw where the straps bit into his flesh. I eased them loose and held his arms in place with my hands.

  “No,” he said, eyes glued to my face.

  “Can I put this around your neck?” With one hand, I slipped the device over his head and secured it around his neck. “This will help them find you so you can get out of here. You’re doing good holding on so tight. You must be really strong.”

  “I play soccer.”

  Poor guy sounded thirsty. I should have brought some water. He was coherent enough though, and other than a nasty sunburn and dehydration, he appeared to be in decent shape, considering.

  “That’s cool. I bet you can run fast too.”

  “I’m pretty fast. Not as fast as Jenny. She’s the fastest on our team.”

  I smiled at that. Already a ladies’ man. “What’s your name?”

  “Cody,” he stammered, looking at me like he was trying to figure out if I was really here.

  “Well, Cody. Do hear that?”

  Cody perked up, his sunburned forehead furrowed in concentration. His eyes went wide the second he picked up on the thwamp, thwamp of the chopper.

  “You know what that is?”

  “A helicopter?”

  “Yeah, it is. You ever been in a helicopter?”

  “No.”

  “Then today’s your lucky day. A guy is gonna drop down from that helicopter and pick you up and take you back to your mom and dad. You okay with that?”

  He nodded his head, not at all convinced of the plan. “He won’t drop me will he?”

  “Hell no. This guy knows what he’s doing. And you’re really strong and brave, so hold on tight.”

  His mouth quirked in a sort of smile. “My mom would take my DS away if I said that word.”

  I had no idea what a DS was. I retraced my words in my head, wondering what I’d said. “What? Hell?”

  “Yeah.” He giggled.

  I liked this kid. He had to be scared out of his mind, and here he was bobbing on a seat cushion, laughing about curse words. Kid was lucky. That cushion had saved his life.

  “Hell is a bad word,” I confirmed. “You should never say hell.” My voice got lost in the sound of the approaching chopper. “Cody, looks like your ride’s here.”

  He craned his neck, looking up at the chopper that now hovered overhead, blades beating wind down on us. His eyes were trained on the bright orange suit. I sank under the water and watched from a few feet below as Cody wrapped his arms tight around the guy’s neck and they hoisted him away, water streaming like a kite tail from their feet. About halfway up, he took his face out of the guy’s neck and looked back down. I knew he couldn’t see me, the water too dark, the chop of the waves making it hard to see clearly. I saw his hand come up, saw the little guy wave at me, and crap if my chest didn’t get all full feeling. That mental clarity I’d been pushing so hard to find slapped me upside the head. Who knew I would have found it in the face of an eight-year-old boy. A lander at that.

  They probably would have found him anyway, even without my help. Maybe not as fast. Maybe not before something else found him first. Maybe not before his grip gave out or a rogue wave toppled him over.

  I swam back to shore bloated with a sense of satisfaction that took me by surprise. This was what I wanted to be. It’s what Jamie had been.

  One of the good guys.

  Beat the hell out of going back to school.

  Thirty-One

  Caris

  You don’t have to choose. You can be both. The girl with the charm, the girl without. They both suit you.

  Maggie’s words sang in my head as I stared in the bathroom mirror. The reflection staring back at me was the same, yet so different than the girl I had seen in the mirror at the start of the summer. The same gray eyes, only now they sparkled like sunlit water. The same freckled nose and cheeks, only now the skin underneath was perfectly sun kissed. The same golden hair, now streaked with platinum as though lightning lived in the strands. It hung nearly to my hips in a heavy curtain. I could be her: Rena, the princess of my childhood imagination.

  Only I wasn’t, and something in the reflection hit me as not quite right. I’d thought about it as I washed my face and brushed my teeth. By the time I put my toothbrush back in its holder, the decision had been made. I fished around the drawer under my bathroom counter.

  My hair flowed through my fingers, silky and smooth and also heavy. I gathered it like a precious bouquet at the base of my neck and took a deep breath, knowing what I was about to do was only symbolic. It would grow back, but I also knew I wouldn’t let it. The task was accomplished with a bit of awkwardness. It wasn’t so easy to reach around the back of my head, and there was so much of it, more than I had ever imagined having.

  When I was through, a slow smile built on my lips. My hair bobbed right under my jaw, uneven in spots, but still absolutely perfect. This was me, only better. My head felt instantly lighter. I scrunched my fingers through it and shook my head, testing the weightlessness of it.

  “Caris.” Noah’s voice sent a shiver of apprehension down my spine.

  I put the scissors down and went out to meet him, my heart in my throat. He stopped short when he saw me, his hand on the door handle and a blank expression on his face.

  He hated it.

  “You cut your hair,” he said without a hint of inflection.

  I wanted his approval. I wanted him to like it. I wanted him to like the me I had chosen.

  “Yeah.” I averted my eyes, looking anywhere but at him, feeling suddenly shy, almost embarrassed, which was absurd. This was Noah, the boy I loved. I raised my eyes back to his and cleared my throat. Not the boy I loved; the man I loved. He’d seen me naked, in broad daylight. Seemed to really like it when I was naked. So I wasn’t sure why I felt so exposed, so vulnerable. “Is it okay? Do you like it?”

  Noah closed the space between us, his eyes gliding over the features of my face. He cupped my jaw in his hands in that way that absolutely melted my heart. He pressed a light kiss to my lips, then he slid his fingers into my hair, the warmth of his hands enveloping my whole head.

  “I like you.” He swallowed and lifted his eyes from my mouth to look me intently in the eyes, so deep I thought he might see my soul, the very core of who I was. “Let me rephrase that. I love you. It doesn’t matter to me if you wear your hair long or short. You could shave it completely bald and I would still love you. If all you could do was dog paddle, I would still love you. If you were a gill-less Homo sapiens, I would still love you. I love your kind, forgiving heart. God, I love the way you’re looking at me right now. I’ll do anything to keep you looking at me like that. I love you, Caris Harper. Not what you are. I love you.” His hands slid down my arms and around my hips to cup both cheeks. He squeezed. “And don’t forget, I love your ass.”

  “Wow,” I said, heart swelling from his declaration. “You just told me you loved me like six times.”

  “Well, they’ve been building up. I’ve known for a while.” He brought his head down, branding me with his mouth. I sagged into him and his arms came around me. I drank him in and soaked in the moisture that dripped on his skin from his swim over. I met each thrust of his tongue with my own. Days and days. I could kiss him for days. He finally lifted his mouth and the room spun, the floor under my feet rolled as if the whole house rocked. He pressed his forehead to mine, and all I could do for a few seconds was stand there and breathe h
im in.

  “I guess I should tell you I lied to you that day when I said I was pretty sure I loved you. I was sure. I just didn’t want to be the first to say it.”

  “I figured as much,” he said.

  Before I could feign outrage, his head came down and his mouth claimed mine. His lips were warm and supple, and I wanted so badly to plunge deeper, but he lifted his head.

  “Now that that’s out of the way, I have a surprise for you.” He grabbed my hand and pulled me out the door when all I wanted to do was test out the bed, the one place we hadn’t actually done it yet.

  “Where are we going?”

  “You’ll see.”

  Every time I plunged myself into the Gulf I felt more and more at home. Noah set a slow and lazy pace, one that made touching easy, because here in the Deep, it was impossible to keep my hands off of him. My mind reached for him, the Song so subtle and surprising that he stopped and his eyes collided with mine. And then he was in front of me cradling my face in his hands. Maybe the Song was still there, prompted not by need, but by want.

  It wasn’t long before they came. I heard them first, before their shapes took form in the Deep. Too many to count, the dolphins floated on all sides like bubbles drifting on the wind. One of them bumped me lightly on the shoulder. I turned my head and gasped with surprise to see Ellie smiling back at me. A calf hovered close to her belly, the most adorable thing I had ever seen. My mouth fell open in a silent “awww.” I reached out my hand. Shy at first, the calf held back, sticking close to Ellie’s side. My arm stayed outstretched, not reaching, only waiting as I crooned softly. The calf finally found its courage and shifted slightly forward, placing the slightest bump against my palm. I laughed in wonder.

  We swam with the pod for nearly an hour. I followed along beside Ellie and her calf, content with the playful jabs he delivered to my side, to simply watch as Noah interacted with the dolphins. He had engaged two young males in what appeared to be a game of tag. They darted with precise quickness, shooting through the pod with sudden bursts of speed that left me spellbound and breathless. He made another pass, open-mouthed, his teeth clamping down on my left butt cheek as he sped by before surging to the surface.