She didn’t say anything. She wasn’t sure what to believe.
“Where did you go?” he asked.
She shrugged. “It’s not important anymore.”
“Yeah, it is. It is to me. Tell me. Where have you been all these years?”
She looked up at him then. “Atlanta, Shades. I’ve been in Atlanta.”
His head pulled back an inch. “Atlanta?”
She nodded.
His brows rose in shock. “All this time…you’ve been just a couple hours ride from here?”
“Yes.”
“Fuck.”
She looked away and could feel her eyes filling. How she’d wanted him to come for her back then.
“Fuck. All these years. All these wasted years.” His head was bent, his eyes on the floor. And then he lifted his head, his eyes soft on hers, filled with what looked like regret. He shook his head. “I should have tracked you down. I should have come for you, Sky.”
“But you didn’t.”
“No, I didn’t. I can’t change that. But, you and me, Skylar, we’re not over.”
“We are.”
He shook his head. “Not by a long shot, honey. Now that I’ve got you back—”
“What makes you think you’ve got me back?”
His head pulled back, and he studied her face for a long moment. “Crash? You’re with him still? He left town. For good, the way I heard. And you’re here. I thought that was over.”
She swallowed, considering for a moment letting him continue thinking what he’d been led to believe. But in the end, she couldn’t do it. “No. I’m not with him, Shades. I never was.”
His eyes narrowed. “What do you mean you never were?”
“Crash and I, it’s not what you thought. We’re just friends.”
“So you and him…”
“No.”
“He never fucked you?”
“God, Shades!”
“Need to hear you say it. Need to hear those words come outta your mouth, Sky.”
“No, he never fucked me, Shades. Happy?”
He studied her a long time, and then a slow grin pulled at his mouth. “Yeah. Ecstatic”
She rolled her eyes.
His smile faded. “All this time you let me think you were with him. Why?”
“It was the only thing I knew would keep you away. A brother doesn’t mess with another brother’s ol’ lady.”
He took a step away and ran an aggravated hand through his hair. “Christ, Skylar, you’ve been lying to me since the minute you rolled through those gates.”
She watched him begin pacing back and forth in front of her. “I never lied to you.”
He spun around back to her. “Okay then, half-truths and bullshit. You withheld the whole story, and that’s just as bad.”
“And what about you? You’ve done the same. You never told me the truth about why you sent me away. You told me you didn’t want me anymore.”
He stalked toward her. “I never said that. Never.”
“You let me believe it.”
His eyes searched hers, something powerful flaring to life in them. And then the words that came out of his mouth shocked her.
“Just get naked, and show me how sorry you are.”
“Sorry? For what?”
“For letting me think all this time you were with Crash. For all this time we’ve wasted.”
“Any wasted time we’ve had is your fault,” she argued right back.
A moment later, she found herself on her back on the bed. He’d bent, wrapped his arms around her thighs and lifted, heaving her back onto the bed, his big muscular body coming down on top of her, pinning her down. Her breath huffed out with her surprise, and she pushed on his shoulders. “Wait, Shades. What are you doing?”
“Done talkin’, babe.”
She looked up into his eyes. They were hungry. A hunger she remembered from so long ago. And suddenly it was like no time had passed since they’d last been together like this. In each other’s arms. She paused only a moment before she found her arms winding around his neck, pulling him closer, her eyes falling to his mouth, wondering why he was hesitating when she wanted that mouth on hers so badly.
He was up on his elbows, his hands cupping her face. He must have seen the questioning look in her eyes, because he explained, “I’ve waited forever to have you under me again. Let me take it in.”
She watched as his eyes roamed over her face, his thumbs stroking her cheeks gently. And then his eyes returned to hers.
“I’ve missed you, baby. God, how I’ve missed you.”
“I’ve missed you, too, Shades. So much.”
And then, finally, his head lowered, and his mouth touched hers. A soft tender kiss, just a brush of his lips. She felt his soft close beard brush against her skin, and she moaned, remembering the erotic feeling of it touching her throat, her belly, her thighs. Her hands slid up into his hair, scratching his scalp, clutching handfuls, and she felt his body respond, his hips arching into the cradle between her thighs. He brushed the hair from her face, and his tongue licked along her lips seeking entry. She opened and he didn’t hesitate to sweep inside, twisting his head to deepen the kiss. It wasn’t long before he was breaking free, his mouth skating along her cheek to her throat, the soft underside of her jaw, and then finally, to her ear.
She heard him growl, “I’m gonna make it all up to you, Sky. I swear. You let me in, I’ll never hurt you again. I’ll never let you down again.”
Her legs locked around him, giving him his answer.
He pulled back to look down at her, an almost stunned expression in his eyes, and she had to smile and nod, letting him know that yes, he’d read that response right. And then she saw an answering smile form on his mouth. And then that beautiful mouth descended to hers again. This time his kiss was more urgent, filled with all the pent up desire she was feeling as well. Need. Hunger. Want. It was all rolled up in that kiss.
His hand moved to the hem of her shirt and began tugging it up. He broke the kiss long enough to pull the shirt up over her head and toss it to the floor. And then his mouth was moving down her throat, to her collar bone, to the cleavage pushed up by her bra. His fingers curled around her strap and he pulled it slowly down her arm until it caught on her elbow. Then, with his mouth still on her skin, he slid his arms under her, his hands going to the clasp. She arched her back to help him. A flick of his fingers and he was pulling the bra free, lifting up to yank it from her arms and toss it aside.
She watched his eyes take her in, moving over every inch of her. And then his head was dipping, his mouth latching onto a nipple, his arms tightening around her ribs.
Her hands stroked over his biceps, his shoulders, up his neck to slide into his hair. Her head fell back as he sucked hard, a jolt zinging through her straight to between her legs. Her mouth fell open, a shuddering gasp escaping.
He moved to the other one. Another hard pull and tug of his mouth sent a second jolt through her. Her hips lifted, instinctively rubbing against him, urgently seeking some relief.
He responded by sliding down, his mouth moving over her exposed belly. He stopped to play with her navel, his tongue dipping inside, and then his hands were on the fastening of her jeans, and he rose up to yank them down, pulling them free and tossing them on the floor.
He tore his cut off and pulled his tee over his head tossing it aside. One hand went to the base of his spine, yanking his pistol free from his waistband. He planted one hand in the bed, his chest looming over her as he stretched across her to lay the gun on the nightstand. Then he was back up on his knees, staring down at her, as his hands moved to his belt, unbuckling it.
She stared up at him, taking in his chest, his abs, the muscles in his arms flexing as he worked the belt free. He slid back off the end of the bed, pulled his boots off and then his jeans hit the floor. And her eyes took him all in.
He crawled up over her, one hand planted in the bed, one warm palm settling low on
her soft belly, the heat of his touch melting into her skin.
And then his hand slid up, and he picked up the rosary that hung from her neck and lay between her breasts. His thumb brushed over the cross.
“This brought you back to me,” he murmured softly, reverently. Then as she watched, he lifted the cross to his lips and kissed it before setting it back down on her.
Her eyes moved from his hand up his chest to his eyes. His heated gaze bore into her. Her chest rose and fell in anticipation as he hesitated, drawing the moment out. Her tongue slipped out to wet her lips, and his eyes dropped to her mouth. The arm holding him suspended over her flexed, lowering him an inch at a time in a slow one handed push up until his mouth dipped to brush hers. Her palms moved up his chest, gliding over his skin, and she felt him tremble. He whispered against her mouth.
“I want to take my time. I don’t want to rush this.”
Then he was back up on his knees, his hands going to her hips, his fingers curling in the fabric of her panties, pulling them down her thighs.
Her mind flashed back, and the words tumbled out of her mouth in a soft whisper. “I remember the last time you took off my panties. You kept them.”
He pulled them free and tossed them aside. His hands sliding slowly up her thighs, and his eyes connected with hers.
“I still have them.”
As their eyes held, he dipped his head, his mouth brushing a soft kiss to her belly. And then one large hand slid to the inside of her thigh, slid down to just above her knee, and he pushed out, spreading her open.
She tried to reach for him.
“Lie back, baby.”
She did as he asked, her hands dropping away. He slid down, his broad shoulders pushing her thighs open and up. His mouth came down on her, softly at first. Teasing, gentle licks designed to arouse and torment until she was undulating beneath him. When she couldn’t take it anymore, he got more aggressive with the attention his mouth lashed over her.
Her hips lifted, seeking more. Needing more. He didn’t deny her. He slid two fingers inside her, seeking her sweet spot with one hand, while the thumb of his other hand took up its own stroking rhythm, bringing her closer and closer with every perfectly timed rubbing caress. Over and over and over and over. He wouldn’t let up until she was thrashing on the bed, her hips lifting to meet each of his strokes in a craving need driven by a rhythm as old as time.
“Shades,” she panted, her breath nothing but short huffs now.
“So wet, baby. So wet. Do you know how bad I want you, baby? How bad I want to sink my dick inside your sweet pussy?” His voice was deep, rumbling and so very sexy.
His words brought her closer as his hands kept working her.
“Then do it. Please,” she begged, no shame left. “Please.”
“Not yet. Not till you’ve come. Not till I’ve satisfied you, baby.” His mouth came down on her, and her head arched back as she sucked in a shuddering breath and held it. She soared higher until she was teetering on the edge for a moment, and then he pressed his palm down on her lower belly, his fingers pushing up against that sweet spot inside her, and she tumbled over the edge in an explosive orgasm that had her groaning out loud.
She could feel her arousal coat his hand in a fresh drenching of release. She sunk back, melting into the pillow, her breathing heavy as she floated back down to earth. Shades withdrew his fingers and ministered to her with soft licks and nuzzles.
He kept at it until his stimulations had her desires awakening again. Urging her on, provoking her senses, drawing out her need and arousal once more.
Her hands grabbed at his biceps, urging him up, wanting his weight on her once more. Wanting him inside her, wanting him to take her.
“Please, Shades. Take me. Now.”
“You on the pill, Sky?”
She nodded.
“I always use a condom, baby. Always. With every woman but you. I’m clean, Sky and I don’t want anything between us. You ready for me, Sky?”
“Yes. So ready. Please.”
“Good, baby. Because I can’t wait another second.” He slid up her body and surged inside her with one forceful thrust, sinking all the way to the hilt. She gasped at his entry. She’d forgotten how large he was, how he filled her as deep as only he did. She felt pinned, immobilized, claimed, owned.
He stared down at her, eyes searching hers with awe.
“Hello, love,” he whispered.
“Hello, love,” she responded, remembering—as he must have—that those were the words they’d murmured to each other the first time they’d made love.
Her hand came up, her thumb brushing over his lower lip. Once. Twice. And then her arms slid around his neck, clutching tightly as he began to glide in and out of her, gently at first, and then with each repeated stroke he grew more rough and urgent until he was pounding into her, his hands planted in the bed, his arms locked, holding his weight off her. He stared down at her, their eyes connecting as his chest grew slick with sweat from his exertions. Her eyes couldn’t help but trail over his beautiful body, his sculpted muscles flexing, his hair growing damp, his breathing labored, his pulse pounding in a vein in his throat.
She watched his jaw clench, and she tightened her legs around him, her pussy clamping down on him, and he thrust one final time, letting out a roar as he climaxed inside her, his body going rock solid above her a long moment before he collapsed on top of her.
She stroked his back, holding him close, loving the feel of his weight pinning her down. His breathing sawed in and out of him. Her mouth moved to his throat, pressing soft loving kisses from his collar bone, to his jaw, to his ear. She nuzzled and nipped at his earlobe.
She heard him groan and felt the vibration rumble through his chest. Her hands slid from his back, down his spine, to the dimples at the base, to his buttocks.
At her stroking touch, she felt him growing hard again inside her, and he arched his hips against her. She moaned as the insides of her tender thighs protested. He rose up to search her eyes.
“Was I too rough? Did I hurt you, baby?”
Her foot moved over the back of his leg, the bottom on her foot stroking his calf.
“I’m good.”
He grinned. “You’re very good. But that’s not what I asked.”
She smiled at his compliment. “No, you didn’t hurt me.”
She felt so contented, so at peace, so truly happy for the first time in so long, maybe even for the first time since she’d last been in his arms. Sex was not only an expression of how they felt about each other deep down, it was also a bridge back to each other. It was a powerful way to reconnect. It cut through all the bullshit, straight to the feelings. Straight to the soul. Straight to the heart.
Still buried inside her, he lifted up enough to again take the cross in his hand. She watched as his eyes studied it.
“I made a deal with God. If he opened your heart to me again, I promised him I’d be a better man, the kind of man you deserve.”
She took his face in her hands, cupping it gently, bringing his eyes to hers. “I don’t need you to be a better man, Shades. I fell in love with the man you are, faults and all.”
He grinned at her. “I’ve got a few of those, Sky.”
“I don’t need anything but your love.”
“You have it, Sky.” He pressed a soft kiss to her mouth, and then lifted back up to look at her again. “I do love you, baby.”
“I love you, too.”
Then he pulled out and fell to his back on the bed beside her. Wrapping his arms around her he pulled her close. They lay that way for a long time, her head tucked under his chin, her cheek on his chest. His fingers stroked lightly up and down her back, and her fingers moved over his chest, tracing idle patterns.
“Babe, how’d you end up in such a big house like this?”
She smiled remembering how Shades always liked pillow talk. When she’d stay at his place and they’d make love, afterward he always liked to talk, about h
is day, about hers, about something funny one of the guys did. It really didn’t matter what the topic was, but they’d murmur back and forth for a long time before one or both of them would drift off to sleep. She’d always loved that about him. And she’d missed it.
“A friend is letting me stay here,” she replied.
“Huh. A friend, eh?” She felt him tense under her.
“A friend of my boss.”
“Your boss?”
“I needed a place to stay when I came back to town. Eric made a call for me. His friend had this place, and it was standing empty, so he told Eric I could use it for the summer.”
“Eric, huh?”
“Jealous?”
“Maybe. Do I need to be?”
“Hardly. He’s gay.”
“Thank you, Lord.”
She giggled.
“It’s a nice place. I like this big bed.”
She grinned. “I’m sure you do.”
They were quiet for a minute.
“Shades?” she whispered.
“Hmm?”
“I’m scared.” She felt the hand stroking her back go still.
“Of what?”
“I’m afraid this is all going to be taken away again.”
He pressed a kiss to her forehead. “I’m not going anywhere, baby.”
“You don’t understand. My whole life has been about letting go. I’ve had to let go of so many people, Shades. Every time I got attached, let someone become important in my life, I’ve had to learn to let them go. It’s hard to let anyone become important after that. But I let you become important. And you tore my heart out. And I’m afraid it’s going to happen again.”
Shades was quiet for a long moment, and then he started talking.
“That summer we met…I’d already almost reached the end of my prospecting. At the time, I couldn’t imagine having gone through everything I’d already gone through only to have that patch yanked away from me.
“I was young, Sky. Young and selfish. Too young to realize that losing you would be the bigger loss. I made a mistake, Skylar. I never should have fucking let you go the first time.
“If I hadn’t, maybe you wouldn’t have had to go through all the pain you did. All I thought about was me. What I was going to lose. I didn’t think about you. How it would affect you. I see that now. I was an alpha dog, and you were a sweet innocent shy girl. I thought Cole was right to protect you and run me off.
SHADES: An Evil Dead MC Story (The Outlaw Series Book 3) Page 12