The Only Way

by Magan Vernon

  “Nothing. I was just looking at a funny meme,” I said, trying to cover myself.

  She smiled as if she knew. “I’m sure it was the internet that gave you that big of a smile and not a girl.”

  I laughed. “Yeah. Because that sounds like me.”

  She shook her head. “Stranger things have happened.” Mom put her hand on my shoulder. “Like my son meeting me for lunch and telling me he has plans for a non-profit.”

  I rubbed the back of my neck. I didn’t know if I was more nervous to admit that I did have a girl I was talking to or to present the business plan to my parents. “Yeah I have the folders in Trigg’s car. Do you want me to get them now?”

  She shook her head. “No. That’s fine. It can wait until after dinner.” She squeezed my shoulder. “And since you aren’t smiling over a girl, I have someone that I want you to meet.”

  “Mom.” I groaned. “I don’t need you to try and hook me up with someone.”

  She smiled. “Humor me, please? It’s one of your dad’s colleague’s daughters and she’s been asking about you. She’s very pretty and getting her masters in teaching. She could be a good asset as you move forward with your project.”

  I sighed. “Fine. You’re lucky I like you.”

  “Follow me,” Mom said and turned toward the main living room.

  There clusters of people gathered around, sipping drinks from fluted glasses in their expensive suits and dresses. It was the same thing every year and usually I could escape to the back porch and have a smoke but I wasn’t sure that anybody was going to let me out of their sights.

  “Donald, Carrie, I have someone you two were asking about.” Mom tapped the shoulder of an older man in a black suit and a younger girl next to him. She had long, curly blonde hair and wore a black dress with a back that was so low, I wasn’t sure how her ass crack wasn’t showing. When she turned toward me, my eyes would have normally gone to that low dip in the front but instead they went somewhere else.

  My eyes widened when I came face to face with the girl I fucked in a dressing room just a few weeks before.

  Holy Shit.

  “Hello, Tripp.” Carrie’s voice was low and sultry, unlike the shaky, high-pitched tone she had when she greeted me at the store.

  “Pleasure to meet you, Carrie,” I said her name as if I couldn’t wait to get it out of my mouth. Like it was vile. I’d made plenty of mistakes and fucked a lot of random girls, but I never thought one would show up at my parents house.

  “Carrie is getting her master’s in education at Loyola so I thought you’d want to talk to her about your business proposal. I’m sure she’d be able to help you out,” Mom said, giving me a wink like she was doing me some big favor.

  “Donald, why don’t you come with me to get a refill,” Mom said, eyeing the older gentleman with Carrie.

  He smiled, looking between me and Carrie. “My pleasure. We’ll let these two get acquainted.”

  Seriously? They were trying to play matchmaker. I thought I was definitely too old for that, or at least not that desperate looking.

  Mom and Donald walked off toward the dining room which left me standing there with one of my former conquests.

  “So...it’s been awhile,” she said, sliding closer to me. She trailed her fingers down my arm, stopping at my wrist then moved lower, to my waist.

  Normally that kind of move would signal that I needed to take her somewhere, anywhere and fuck her senseless. But instead I felt nothing. Absolutely nothing for this girl. My dick wanted to crawl back inside of me instead of getting inside her.

  “Yeah.” I shoved my free hand in my pocket and kept the other one firmly grasped on my can. I didn’t want to be a dick, but I didn’t want her to think I had any interest in round two.

  “So, I guess our dads worked together as pages in the house when they were in high school. I didn’t know until Dad said we were invited here for Thanksgiving.” She leaned in closer, the heat of her core pressed into my leg. “And I couldn’t resist the offer.”

  I forced a smile. “Yeah. It’s good to see you as well.”

  She pushed a strand of hair out of her face and then ran her finger down the front of her dress. I would be lying if I said my eyes didn't follow that digit down to where her perky breasts were practically popping out of it. “Do you want to get out of here? I have something in my purse that would go great with that can of Coke.”

  I blinked once, then twice. Shit, was this girl offering me what I thought she was? Okay, I wasn’t exactly sure what she was offering. It could have been drugs or booze or just sex, but either way I wasn’t taking the chance.

  I rubbed the back of my neck. “I’d love to, but my parents have been watching me like a hawk. I’d think they’d realize I was missing.”

  Seemed like a good enough excuse but the girl was persistent. She smiled slightly and leaned in, her lips vibrating on my ear. “I’m sure your family wouldn’t mind if you disappeared with a hedge fund manager’s daughter.” She ran her tongue along my earlobe then nipped it slightly.

  Dammit. Mom probably wouldn’t. She all but pushed me onto Carrie. This was probably the exact girl that my parents thought I should settle down with: blonde, from a wealthy family, getting her masters, and her dress probably cost more than my monthly rent. A relationship with her would mean that my family could keep up appearances and our wedding announcement would go on page six with offers from reality TV shows to film the whole thing at the Chapman lake house.

  Outside appearances are always deceiving though. She could cover up her closet freakness with a pretty dress. I could cover up my tattoos with an expensive suit, but deep down, we both knew who we were. I knew this girl wasn’t good for me. Someone else was much better.

  As if Trigg knew he had to save me, he came around the corner and nodded in my direction. I widened my eyes and glanced at Carrie then back at him. He got the hint and walked over to us. “Hey, Tripp, been looking for you, buddy.” He smacked me on the back, which knocked me slightly forward.

  “Yeah, sorry, you know doing some business,” I said, nodding toward Carrie.

  “Oh, it better be business because I’m sure your girlfriend would be pissed if she saw you talking to a pretty blonde,” Trigg said, smiling at Carrie. “No offense, darlin’.”

  She smirked. “None taken. I’ll see you two around.” She walked in the opposite direction and I let out a big breath as soon as she was out of eyesight.

  “Thanks for that, Trigg,” I said.

  He laughed. “I figured you’d either love me or hate me for that one, but I was hoping I made the right choice.”

  I nodded. “Yeah. Though Sam isn’t my girlfriend.”

  “Yet,” Trigg said, poking my side.

  “What the fuck was that? Did you just try to tickle me?”

  “Pft, I wouldn’t be that nice to you. I was trying to bother you without actually smacking you upside the head and having everyone stare at us.”

  I shook my head. “Yeah, wouldn’t be the first time one of us caused a scene at family Thanksgiving.”

  “Look, I was nine and I thought Mom’s bra was a slingshot. That was an honest mistake,” he said, putting his hands up.

  “Yeah, maybe that will forever overshadow last year when I snorted coke off that Venezuelan maid’s ass.” I shuddered at the thought of Trey walking in on us in the back pantry. I’d never seen him look so disappointed or disgusted. He just pulled me off of her, snuck me out the back door, and drove me home. He sat there on the couch, watching football until I came down from my high and fell asleep.

  My brothers were always too fucking good to me. I probably didn’t deserve it. Hell, I knew I didn’t. Now, after twenty-six years of fucking it up, It was about time that I finally started doing some good.

  “Hey, I did have to ask you something, before I met with Mom and Dad,” I said, running my hand along my jaw.

  He furrowed his brow and stepped to the other side of me, crossing his arms over
his chest. I cleared my throat. “So, I’ve been doing research and getting everything ready for this non-profit and I need a board of directors. At least three people. I was, of course, going to ask Mom to do it and then me, but I needed one more.” I chewed on my bottom lip. I wasn’t used to asking anyone for anything, especially something this big. I didn’t want to put myself out there. Ever.

  His smile broadened so wide that I thought it was going to fall off his face. “Are you serious? I’d be honored, brother.”

  I let out the breath that I didn’t know I was holding in. “Awesome. That’s great. Thanks.”

  He put his arm around my shoulder. “Anything for you.” His eyes trailed toward the dining room. “And I guess I’m going to have to sandwich you between me and Trey for dinner so that the blonde minx doesn’t try and hop on you again.”

  I laughed. “Yeah. That would be great.”

  “Hey, what else is someone on the board of directors for?”

  Chapter 15

  Dinner was over and people were milling around and chatting. Usually this would be my cue to escape, but for the first time I actually wanted to stick around and see my parents, which was a far cry from where I was a month and a half ago.

  I was surrounded by darkness. I didn’t know how long it had been or how long I’d continue to drown in it.

  There was a low beeping in the back of my head, over and over. It was as if the beeping wanted me to escape the darkness just to get it to shut up.

  But part of me didn’t want to escape. I wanted to stay in oblivion. Completely faded. Hidden from the world.

  But the beeping wouldn’t stop and the fog in my brain was lifting. Instead of complete darkness, the world was gray and the beeping was now accompanied by voices. Low voices. Whispers, so I couldn’t make out what they were saying.

  Instead of being numb, my head pounded. I couldn’t make sense of anything around me. All I could focus on was the noise. The fucking noise needed to stop.

  My eyes popped open and I let out a deep gasp of air. My throat was so dry that it felt like I hadn’t drunk in days.

  The room was white. Stark white. With fluorescent lights and machines with wires that were hooked to me. I didn’t want to be hooked to any fucking thing unless I had control over it.

  I tried to move my hands but they were stuck. Bound to the bed.

  So I did the only thing I could.

  I screamed.

  Two women in scrubs came to my side, murmuring and trying to calm me down. Then another set of nurses came in and started flashing lights in my eyes, checking my blood pressure, and more poking and prodding.

  I didn’t want to be around anyone. I just wanted the darkness back.

  So I closed my eyes.

  “Honey, you have to stay with us,” one woman said, tapping my arm.

  “He’s awake? He’s alive?” A voice I recognized called, but he sounded so far away.

  I blinked, my vision still blurry. There stood my dad in the doorway. His hair was disheveled as if he’d run his hands through it a million times and his clothes were wrinkled. This wasn’t the usual put-together man I was used to.

  “We’re trying to stabilize him now,” one of the women said. “Please, wait outside and we’ll get you when he’s calm.”

  Dad’s eyes stared into mine. There had been so many times that he was pissed off at me. So many times that he had reprimanded me as a kid and even as an adult. But this was something different. This was disappointment.

  And that was the last I saw of him until Election Day.

  I didn’t want to go back to that dark place again. Ever.

  I was afraid of what would happen if my parents said no to this plan. What I would do with my life.

  This was my one shot to prove that I wasn’t a complete and total fuck up and I had to do it right.

  “Mom? Dad? Are you free to discuss that business proposal?”

  They were standing near the fireplace, each with a mug of coffee in their hands. There wasn’t anyone else with them that would question me and I was hoping they wouldn’t brush me off, either.

  Dad smiled. It was his political one. The forced one he had for the cameras. The one I hated.

  “Sure, Son, do you want to step into my office?”

  “Yeah, that sounds great.” I nodded and kept my hands on my folders. I was living on only a few hours of sleep the past week because I had stayed up for so long preparing the information. I’d done so much research, contacted so many people, and crunched so many numbers that my head was swimming with them. I’d lived off coffee and nicotine for so long that after eating the big dinner all I wanted to do was sleep.

  Yet, something was pushing me forward. It was like a high I’d never experienced before and I wasn’t sure when or if I’d ever come down.

  Well, I guess I would if the whole project was shut down.

  Then I’d probably need another kind of high.

  I followed my parents down the hallway to Dad’s office.

  I was expecting Dad to take his big executive chair behind his desk, but instead, he and Mom sat at the two chairs opposite the desk, in the same position, crossing one leg over the other with both their hands folded.

  I cleared my throat and instead of sitting behind the desk, I decided to pull the chair around and put it next to theirs. I wanted to be on equal grounds.

  “I have two folders prepared for each of you that outlines the business plan for Chapman Charities," I said and handed them each one of the manila folders.

  I had note cards. I could have read off of them, but I knew everything I was about to say by heart. It was something I didn’t know I was extremely passionate about until I actually started doing the research.

  Dad and Mom flipped open their folders. They barely glanced at each page that I spent hours typing up, making charts, graphs, and citing different sources. It was like I was back in the MBA program all over again but this time I actually wanted to do the work.

  “As you can see, the first page gives the company’s motto “A tomorrow for all of us” and the initial plan for a board of directors. The next page goes into the non-profit articles of incorporation and bylaws. Now, to get all of this in motion I would just need to set up a meeting with the board of directors before moving forward and filing for a 501(c)3.”

  Dad shut his folder and set it down on the desk. “I think I’ve seen enough.”

  I blinked. “Um, what?”

  All the steam and stamina I had built up was shot down. I didn’t even get to explain myself. What the fuck?

  I clenched and unclenched my fists at my side. Sobriety or no sobriety if he was going to turn me down flat then there was no way I wasn’t going to spiral into my own darkness.

  Dad smiled. “I wasn’t expecting you to do half of this work, but the fact that you stuck with it shows me that you really believe in this plan and I think you’ll do an excellent job with it.”

  I couldn’t believe what he was saying. I actually cleaned out my ear before speaking. “Are you serious?”

  Dad nodded. “Very serious, Tripp. Besides.” He stood up. “Trigg’s already received his inheritance, Trey is about to get his, it seems fair that you have yours as well. Especially with a cause that you seem so passionate about.”

  He patted my back. “You have my blessing.”

  ***

  I walked out of Dad’s office in a fog. It was the highest high I’d ever had without taking anything. Dad actually seemed proud of me for the first time. I didn’t see him smile that much when I graduated Magna Cum Laude from his alma mater or when I received my MBA. I always thought he kind of hated me, but maybe I was wrong.

  Maybe.

  I barely heard Trigg when he yelled my name, but couldn’t ignore the guy when he practically ran into me.

  “Tripp? Can you hear me? You’re not high are you?”

  I shook my head and took a step back, rubbing the back of my neck. “No, man, sorry I just got out of my meeting
with Mom and Dad.”

  “Oh. Yeah. Sorry. I forgot. Hey, Roni just texted me and she said she’d come over with Bella for a bit. Are you okay with hanging out for a while longer?”

  I nodded. “Yeah, that’s cool.”

  “All right, awesome.” He smiled. “Oh, shit. Sorry, I should have asked how it went with Mom and Dad.”

  I shoved my hands in my pockets. Suddenly it didn’t seem like as big of a deal when Trigg was smiling like a fucking nut at being able to see the kid he hasn’t seen in over a month. “Oh, yeah, they said I could have my inheritance and use it to start the business.”

  He smacked my shoulder. “That’s awesome! We’re in business!”

  I smiled a tight-lipped smile. “Yeah. There is still a lot of work to do, though.”

  He laughed. “Oh, come on. I know you’re thrilled and I just blew it. You’d better text Sam and tell her the good news. I’m sure she’ll want to celebrate.”

  Trigg winked, patting my shoulder before he walked back toward the living room.

  “Who is Sam?”

  I almost jumped out of my suit when I heard Mom’s voice behind me.

  I shook my head, turning toward her. “Just a friend who has been helping me out.”

  Mom smiled, crossing her arms over her chest. “By the way Trigg was smiling, she’s more than just a friend. Is that why you looked like you were disgusted with Donald’s daughter?”

  I rubbed the back of my neck, trying to wrack my brain for an answer. “It’s nothing, Mom. She’s a friend that has been helping me out with everything. You know me, I’m still exploring my options.”

  Why the fuck did I say that? I didn’t exactly know what Sam and I were, but whatever it was, I didn’t want to screw it up by telling my parents about it. They would try and meet her and then smile politely and make small talk, but as soon as we left they would talk about what she was wearing, the color of her hair, and all of her tattoos. I knew they wouldn’t see the Sam that I saw.

  She was vulnerable yet tough. She always put others before her, even when she shouldn’t. She’s funny. Smart. Has the best laugh and that’s not even going into that body...