Falling in Love in New York

by HILL, MELISSA

  “God, I feel so awful now, I didn’t know what to get you.” Abby was horrified, and was now kicking herself for being so unimaginative. As usual, she’d bought each member of her family the obligatory, boring-as-hell gift voucher.

  “It’s OK,” Caroline waved her Brown Thomas gift voucher in the air delightedly. “We all know how much you hate shopping, and seeing as I love it … this is perfect!”

  Abby winced, and again ran her gorgeous new gift across her fingers. A miserable old gift voucher versus a sterling silver Tiffany charm bracelet? What kind of sister was she?

  Soon, it was Teresa’s turn to gasp as she too opened Caroline’s present; this one placed in a Christmas card.

  “My goodness Caroline, Tom,” she said, turning to her bashful-looking son-in-law, who typically, said nothing, “this is miles too much.”

  “Oh, don’t be silly, you deserve it Mum. But more importantly, what do you think? Do you like it?”

  “It’s …” It seemed that Caroline had once again rendered a member of the family speechless.

  “What is it Mum?” Claire urged. “What’s in the card?”

  “Tickets,” Teresa said. “Tickets to Verona to see a live performance of Aida.”

  “Wow, Tiffany bracelets, Italian operas and Baby Dior bootees, you really do have this gift-giving business off to a tee, don’t you?” Claire was laughing. “Fabulous stuff Car, although it’ll make our presents seem very ordinary by comparison, won’t it Zach?”

  “Don’t be silly,” Abby was quick to reassure her older sister, and slightly relieved to discover that Claire’s gift was a small white envelope similar to the one she’d given her. Clearly her big sister was a gift voucher aficionado too!

  Claire was still talking. “Now it’s nowhere near as fancy as a Tiffany bracelet, but Zach and I figured it might be something you’d enjoy,” she reiterated as Abby tore open the envelope to find what looked to be a pair of tickets – tickets for a concert to be held back home in Dublin late the following year.

  Caroline looked over Abby’s shoulder. “George Michael tickets – fantastic! Don’t know why I didn’t think of that,” she said smiling as Abby turned the tickets over in her hand, examining them further.

  “Oh good one,” Teresa said happily. “Somebody will be very happy with those.”

  “So what do you think?” Claire asked, when Abby still hadn’t reacted. “Look, I know it’s probably a bit boring, but as you know yourself that concert sold out in minutes and Zach stayed up all right on the web to get them for you, didn’t you?” she added, turning to her husband who smiled proudly. “Now personally I can’t figure out why they sold out so quickly,” she laughed wryly and Caroline laughed too, “but then again, each to his own.”

  For a few moments Abby couldn’t speak. “They’re wonderful … thank you,” she replied, trying to inject the right amount of enthusiasm into her tone, but as Claire’s face fell almost immediately, it obviously wasn’t quite the right amount.

  “You do still have a thing for George, don’t you?” she asked, frowning. “I mean, I just assumed that –”

  “No of course I do, of course I do!” Abby interjected, reaching across and hugging her older sister, all the while trying her utmost to figure out who the hell this George Michael person was, and why her entire family seemed to think she adored him.

  After that and following Zach’s urging, the family gathered around the Christmas tree for some photographs.

  “I’ll email you all copies if you’d like,” he said, when he’d finished taking a selection of family poses, as well as various photos of Caitlyn with her aunts, grandmother and mum and dad.

  “Sorry pet,” he said, when his newborn eventually began to tire of her dad’s continuous demands and started to get cranky, “but someday you’ll thank me for this when you watch them all back on your Memory Chest.”

  “What’s that?” Abby asked, intrigued.

  “What, you’ve never heard of one?”

  “You wouldn’t have Abby,” Claire said, before adding wryly, “it’s yet another one of those over-sentimental American inventions.”

  “Hey, don’t diss sentimentality,” Zach scolded his wife jokingly. “Honestly, I don’t know where I got my wife. I thought you Irish loved all that kind of stuff.”

  “Whatever!” Claire teased, sweeping out of the room baby Caitlyn in her arms.

  “So what is it?” Abby asked again.

  “Aw, it’s a kind of interactive program I set up for Caitlyn when she was born. Come into the study and I’ll show you. I’m uploading these now.”

  Abby followed him through to his computer where he tapped a few keys and brought up a program that was simply headed ‘Caitlyn’s Memory Chest’.

  On the first page was a gorgeous picture of Caitlyn and Claire that looked to have been taken in the hospital not long after she was born. Alongside it were all her birth statistics; weight, length, the exact time she was born … even the name of her midwife!

  “See–this section records how her growth is progressing from week to week,” Zach pointed to the screen. “Here we’ve got photographs like the ones I took today, family celebrations and things like that. It’s basically preserving all the things from her first days on the planet, the little things none of us usually remember from back that far, you know?” Then as if suddenly remembering that Abby’s condition meant something very similar for her, he reddened. “Jeez, I’m sorry Abby, I hope you don’t …I just didn’t think.”

  “Hey it’s OK,” Abby was quick to reassure him. “I think it’s a fantastic idea.”

  Rather than being offended or upset by Zach’s comments, his idea had actually intrigued her.

  Gathering memories…

  One of her major worries about losing her long-term memory was actually very similar to what Zach was describing. Since finding out about the damage, she was terrified she might one day forget things from her past, important things like her family, their names, what they looked like, even what they meant to her.

  Something like this could very well be the answer to her prayers. She could set up a Memory Chest of her own and collect photographs, record diary entries, things to help her remember the things she enjoyed and loved just in case such memories were lost to her for good.

  She and Hannah had by now discussed this ad nauseum, and the doctor seemed certain that some damage was absolutely inevitable, so instead of sitting around worrying about it all like Abby had done over the last few weeks, maybe she should think instead about trying to do something to help fight against it.

  Now that the idea had come to her, a delighted shiver ran up her spine. Why hadn’t she thought of something like this before?

  But strangely, this trip had made her view a whole lot of things differently. When she got home she’d go along with Hannah’s suggestion of making regular diary entries and perhaps start taking more photographs, mementos of experiences she wanted to keep. Essentially, Abby was going to take Finn’s inadvertent advice and from now on, start laying down memories.

  “Do you think you could design something like this for me?” she asked Zach, her mind racing as the seed of an idea began to implant itself more firmly into her brain. “Somewhere for me to store information and photos and stuff before …” She paused briefly, struck by her own choice of words, “before I forget.”

  Chapter 16

  In the days since their return from New York, this idea began to develop even further, and Abby got to thinking more and more about what Hannah had said about emotion and memory being so closely related.

  If there was a real risk of her ‘dropping’ small and trivial things such as learning to play the piano, or putting her hairbrush in the fridge (like she’d done the other day), then there was a very real chance she could end up dropping even more things as time went by. Unless …

  The more Abby thought about it, the more it made sense. The incredible, amazing, unforgettable time she’d had in New York had simpl
y brought it all home to her. If emotion and memory were so strongly linked then maybe, just maybe, she could beat this thing!

  And if she spent the next few months of her life getting out there and literally bombarding her memory with really positive and exciting experiences, then didn’t it stand to reason that they too should be simply unforgettable?

  And, she reasoned her mind racing now, if a negative experience–such as the heartbreak she’d suffered following the break-up with Kieran–could be so strongly imprinted on the brain because of the negative emotions associated it with it, then why not the other way round? Abby knew that she’d already wasted too much time sitting around and moping about this, instead she was going take control and try and beat this thing.

  She decided to broach the subject at her mum’s house the following Sunday.

  It was New Year’s Day and the family were meeting up for another celebratory dinner, this time to include Dermot and make up for his absence in New York. But they’d spent so much time talking and reminiscing about the fun they’d had that Dermot eventually had to tell them to stop.

  “OK, OK, so I missed all the craic at Claire’s,” her younger brother groaned. “Now, can you please stop going on about it and making me feel even worse?”

  “Sorry love,” Teresa said. “We don’t mean to make you feel left out, but it was such a lovely trip, and little Caitlyn was so gorgeous …”

  But the very subject of the trip was the perfect opening for Abby to tentatively explain what she’d been considering.

  “It really was the best time I’ve had in years,” she said, her heart thumping and her eyes shining with enthusiasm, as she prepared to reveal her plans, “so much so that it’s given me an idea.”

  “What kind of idea love?” her mother replied, putting down her glass.

  “Well …” Abby went on to explain about baby Caitlyn’s Memory Chest and how it might be a good idea for her to do something similar.

  “That’s a fantastic idea!” Caroline enthused, and Abby smiled gratefully at her. But when she recounted to the family her subsequent train of thought, and her belief that she could beat the memory decline, there was a rather … tense silence.

  Once again Abby felt ill at ease. OK, so she’d expected the family to have some reservations about all of this, and perhaps warn her that she shouldn’t get her hopes up, but what she didn’t expect was this patent negativity. “I don’t know, it’s just I enjoyed New York so much …” she babbled, trying to explain, “and I know it’s something I’ll remember for a very long time.” Out of the corner or her eye, she thought she saw her mother and Caroline exchange a glance. “So I thought that if I actively sought out some other things –”

  “Well, what kind of things did you have in mind?” Teresa asked then, putting a forkful of broccoli in her mouth. By her tone Abby knew immediately that her mother didn’t share her own optimism.

  “Well that’s the thing, I’m not entirely sure yet. I was kind of hoping you might be able to give me some suggestions. As I said, I want to get out there now and experience some other really…memorable things, but now that I’ve come up with the idea I’m not sure where to start.” While the notion of going out there and bombarding her brain with experiences equal to the one in New York seemed fine in theory, discussing it out loud was a different kettle of fish altogether.

  “Memorable things …” Dermot mused, scraping his plate. “Like what?”

  Again, Abby shifted in her seat, mortified now. This was stupid and maybe she should have thought about it some more before getting carried away with herself like this. Clearly the others thought she was crazy. “I don’t know,” she shrugged, “interesting things, I suppose.”

  Caroline seemed to be thinking it over. “Tell you what – you should make a list!” she declared suddenly. “That’s what I do whenever I start a project.”

  The entire family stared at her, each no doubt trying to remember when Caroline had last completed a full sentence, let alone a project.

  “When I’m organising my wardrobe, for one!” she supplied exasperated. “I make a list of the clothes I have, and then the things I need. Then I tick each item off one by one until I have them all, don’t I Tom?” She turned to her husband, who true to form, nodded in silent agreement.

  “A list?” Abby was turning the idea over in her head. It was a good idea and it also meant that she’d have a definite plan of action, something to work towards instead of just randomly trying things out. And seeing as the doctors seemed determined to keep her out of work for the best part of a year, it would mercifully give her something to fill her days with other than moping around the flat, depressing herself even further. In Caroline’s words, this could be her project.

  Teresa began clearing empty dinner plates. “Everyone for dessert?” she asked, in what appeared–much to Abby’s disappointment–as a complete avoidance of the subject.

  “Yes, and it’s New Years Eve too–the perfect time for lists and resolutions!” Caroline insisted, getting carried away by the idea too. “Oh, it’ll be so much fun–let’s do it now.” She whipped out her handbag and with typical enthusiasm, took out a tiny notepad and pen.

  “Right,” she murmured, scribbling down something on the pad. “What’ll be the first thing on the list?”

  Dermot nudged his sister’s elbow. “Erm, for one thing it’s Abby’s list, so don’t you think she should be one making it?” he pointed out.

  Caroline shook her head. “Oh sure, of course, silly me. Here you go.”

  As her sister passed the notepad across the table and Abby came to face to face with the heading Things to Do (unforgettable) she faltered a little. The idea sounded great in theory, but again when faced with a blank page and such a daunting task, she wasn’t really sure where to start.

  The others, including her mother, were looking at her expectantly.

  “Well, what’s the first thing?” Caroline demanded. “Surely there’s one major thing you’ve always wanted to do? We all have one, don’t we? I certainly know what mine is anyway …what?” she asked, when the others looked at her blankly “You mean you don’t know?”

  “We’re all waiting with baited breath to find out,” Dermot drawled.

  “Well to be seated front row at Paris Fashion Week!” she announced, as if this was the most obvious thing in the world. “And photographed there too–that would be even better.” When Dermot sniggered, she gave him dig in the ribs. “Laugh all you like–so you mightn’t be bothered, but we were talking about what would be unforgettable for me. We all know what you’d like to do.”

  “Do you now?” he challenged.

  Caroline sniffed, giving him a dismissive look. “I certainly have a pretty good idea anyway.”

  “OK then–what?”

  “Well, it would be flying one of those jet-fighter things, or something macho like that, wouldn’t it?” she said, with a roll of her eyes.

  But by his surprised and reluctantly impressed face, Abby knew that her sister had been spot on.

  “Bloody hell Car, I take it all back,” he said, “you do know your stuff.”

  Caroline beamed. “And Mum, for a long time yours was going to the opera wasn’t it– a real, live Italian opera.”

  “Yes love,” Teresa smiled wistfully, “that’s been a big dream of mine for ages, which was why I was so thrilled with your Christmas present.”

  With a slight start, Abby realised that Caroline did indeed seem to know her family well–probably even better than they knew themselves! In fact, thinking of it now, this had always been reflected in the birthday or Christmas gifts she gave them. While all Teresa’s children had known that their mum enjoyed listening to opera music around the house, Abby would never in a million years have thought of sending her to a real, live, Italian opera. Yet, Caroline had known instinctively that her mother would love this, in the same way that she’d known Abby would appreciate that gorgeous Tiffany bracelet as a memento of the lovely time they’d
all had in New York.

  Now she looked at her sister. “What about me?” she asked. “Can you think of something I’ve always wanted to do, because off the top of my head I really can’t think of anything.”

  Caroline bit her lip. “To be honest, no–I’d have a think a bit more about that,” she said, leaving Abby feeling faintly disappointed. Was she that much of an oddball that her sister couldn’t immediately pinpoint something she’d like, in the way she had with the others? “Anyway, we’re trying to make a list of things for you to do–not just one and …” Then she stopped short and her eyes widened. “That’s it!” she shrieked, excitedly waving both hands in the air.

  “What’s it?” Abby asked uncertainly.

  “Oh, it’ll be absolutely perfect! Tell you what,” she said, turning to Abby, “why don’t you spend the next few days coming up with some things on your own, they don’t have to be mind-blowing, amazing things, sometimes the simplest things can be just as nice, can’t they Tom?” Plainly unsure as to what his wife was getting at, Tom reddened a little before nodding. “But in addition to the things you come up with, why don’t you let us think of some to add to it too?”

  “I don’t understand...” While Abby welcomed the idea of not having to come up with a full list here and now, she still wasn’t sure what else Caroline was getting at.

  “I’m saying that each one of us could also come up with something enjoyable for you to do, or even better, we could do it with you!” her sister proclaimed, clearly on a roll now.

  Abby looked at the others who seemed equally clueless. “I still don’t follow.”

  Caroline sighed. “Abby, you’re my sister and I love you lots, but even you have to admit that for the last few years, you’ve been an awful bore.”

  “Caroline!” Teresa scolded.

  “No, it’s OK Mum.” Abby actually wasn’t as insulted as she might have been. She and Caroline had already had a similar conversation, and deep down she knew all too well what her sister was talking about. She had indeed been a bore this last while, never wanting to take part in anything, go anywhere or see anyone. “I think I know what you mean. I have been a pain in the arse recently, which is partly the reason I want to do this.”