A Year to Remember
Page 6
At least tonight, I was getting out of the house. Since my date with Steven, I’d spent my free time sitting on the couch and binging on sweets.
Missy and I had a thing for science fiction. We saw every Star Wars and Star Trek movie, even the ones that made us physically ill to watch. We wouldn’t classify ourselves as Trekkies or anything, but we’ve considered going to Comic-Con in California.
Tonight, we had tickets for a sneak preview of the new Star Trek movie.
Since I had already blown my diet this week, I ordered a large popcorn, licorice, and a Diet Coke. Missy ordered a bottled water. Even though she didn’t need to watch her weight, she didn’t like popcorn or sweets. Instead, she’d bring her own snack, usually a small bag of pretzels or an apple. Sometimes, I wished I could be more like her.
While standing in line, I heard a familiar voice.
“Oh my God! I can’t believe it!”
Missy paled. We turned to Lori, the source of the voice.
Lori had been our third wheel all through college. First, she lived in the same dorm as us. When we moved off-campus, she followed us to the same apartment building, hoping we’d ask her to share an apartment. Missy and I wouldn’t let anyone come between us, not another friend or even a significant other. We were as close as sisters, except we never fought with one another. I used to feel a little guilty about how we treated Lori, but she never seemed to mind.
She changed physically since we last saw her. Her long dirty blond hair was now dyed to dark auburn and cut in a pixie style, which suited her heart-shaped face. Lori seemed more relaxed than she had in college, when she always appeared anxious and nervous. I sensed her self-confidence.
I never discovered why Lori stopped calling us for plans and started refusing my invitations. It happened suddenly, without any catalyst or argument.
“Lori, how are you?” I gave her a hug, but Missy just stood there, not saying a word, her teeth clenched. I wondered if Missy knew more about why we’d grown apart than she previously let on.
“I’m well, thanks. How about you? Did you become a psychologist like you planned?”
“I did. Are you a lawyer?”
She giggled and shook her head. “No, I realized I only wanted to become a lawyer because it’s what was expected of me. I’m an artist and I run an art gallery.”
“Wow, I didn’t know you even liked art.”
Lori gave Missy a furtive glance. “I wasn’t very accepting about myself back then. That’s why I hitched my wagon to your star. I didn’t know how to be myself until art school.”
“I’m glad you did. You seem very happy.”
“For the most part, I am,” she agreed, nodding enthusiastically. Then, she grew quiet until she realized she hadn’t introduced her friend standing next to her.
“I’m such an idiot. Missy, Sara, this is my friend, Grace. Grace, this is Missy and Sara, my best friends from college.”
Grace, a small and unassuming girl, shook our hands but didn’t say a word.
“Are you guys seeing the new Star Trek?”
“Of course,” I replied. “Do you want to sit with us?” I added before I recalled the earlier tension between Missy and Lori. Oh well, I couldn’t take it back now.
“Sure, if you don’t mind.”
The four of us made our way through the crowd to find four seats together. I took the aisle since I always have to run to the ladies’ room at least once during a flick. Missy sat between me and Lori, and Grace sat on the other side of Lori. I hoped Missy wouldn’t feel too uncomfortable. She still hadn’t said a word, a miracle unto itself.
Halfway through the film, Missy excused herself to use the restroom. A few minutes later, Lori followed. Completely engrossed in the movie, it didn’t occur to me to think their absences were related.
Grace moved over to sit next to me and whispered in my ear. “Do you think we should go find them?”
“I’m sure they’re fine. Why would we need to find them?” I had already missed a few minutes earlier in the film when I ran to the bathroom, and I didn’t want to leave again.
“You know, because of what happened between them.”
“What happened between them?”
“Uh, nothing. Forget I said anything, okay?”
I nodded, as I attempted to guess what secret Missy had been keeping from me all these years. Could Missy and Lori have been lovers? If so, why wouldn’t she have told me about it? She knew I didn’t understand why Lori had grown distant from us all those years ago. What else was she keeping from me?
They returned together after a few more minutes, and I leaned over to fill in Missy on what she’d missed. She didn’t seem to care, even though she kept her eyes on the screen. I could tell she was lost in her thoughts.
When the movie ended, Missy abruptly ran off to use the restroom again. I said my goodbyes to Lori and Grace and exchanged phone numbers with Lori in order to make plans to get a drink and catch up.
By the time Missy returned, Lori and Grace were gone and she pretended as though nothing strange had occurred.
“Great movie, huh?”
I couldn’t keep myself from confronting her, as hard as I tried. I should give her the opportunity to explain, but my curiosity got the better of me.
“What’s going on between you and Lori?”
We got into the car and began to drive toward my condo. Apparently, we were no longer going out for a drink tonight.
“Nothing,” Missy replied, her eyes on the road ahead.
“Grace seemed to think there was something.”
“Grace doesn’t know what she’s talking about.”
I couldn’t believe my best friend, who I trusted with my deepest, darkest secrets, wouldn’t share.
“You’re lying to me. Missy, were you and Lori lovers?”
She stayed silent for a long minute. “No.”
“Do you know why she stopped hanging out with us?”
Missy turned to me. “It was a long time ago, Sara. Just forget about it, okay?” She resumed her focus to the road and turned on the music.
I didn’t want to fight with her. I didn’t even know how to fight with her. In the end, I decided to give her more time to confide in me with her secret before tackling the subject of Lori with her again.
We said goodnight and gave each other our usual hug, but the tension remained. Whether we wanted it to or not, something had changed in our relationship tonight.
I stayed in bed on Saturday morning, refusing to face the day. The angel on my shoulder demanded I get out of bed, eat a healthy breakfast, and use my free time to exercise. The devil on my other shoulder whispered I should stay in bed for another few hours.
The devil won.
By the afternoon, I made it to the shower. I threw on a robe and started my coffee maker, checking my email as I waited for my caffeine fix.
Not surprisingly, I had no messages from anyone on JDate. I checked my spam box and prepared to erase all the messages with the click of a single button, but the title of an email caught my eye. Clicking on the message “Metro-Detroit Speed Dating,” I read about an upcoming singles event.
Tired of spending your nights alone?
Ready to meet “the one” but not sure how?
Come to the Metro-Detroit Speed Dating Event.
Open to anyone aged 25-40.
Saturday, March 31st @ 7pm.
The Underground, Royal Oak, Michigan.
$20 plus cash bar
Register at www.meetajewnow.com
Sponsored by Jewish Federation
For the next hour, I researched speed dating, since I really didn’t know anything about it other than what I saw on television. I went to the website to read more about it and learned the organizers of the event would match me with ten men for six-minute mini-dates. If one of my dates and I both indicated we’d like to get to know each other better, the organizers would release our personal contact information to one another.
Original
ly, the Jews came up with the idea of speed dating and then everyone else jumped on the bandwagon. According to the Internet, Rabbi Deyo of Aish HaTorah had created the concept in order to get Jewish singles to connect and marry. I myself have always had a strict policy of only dating Jewish men.
In high school, Missy and I had actively participated in a Jewish youth group. Her cousins recruited us in eighth grade, and we joined before knowing anything about it.
Then in December of our freshman year of high school, with nothing planned over winter break, we decided to go to a convention held at our local Jewish Community Center. The local chapters competed in sports and games, talents, arts and crafts, and various other categories. We met boys and girls from all over the Metro-area schools.
I grew up in a wealthy area of Metro-Detroit, and I never felt completely comfortable around the kids in my neighborhood. From the youth group, I met the boys from “the other side of the tracks” and for the first time, I felt as though I fit in. They didn’t care about designer clothes or what kind of car I drove. They didn’t get an allowance from their parents. They all had jobs to earn the money they needed to see a movie with their friends or take a date out to dinner.
On New Year’s Eve, Missy and I found ourselves at her mother’s house alone for the evening, with no plans. On a whim, we called a boy we met at the convention earlier that week. After flirting with him on the phone for a bit, Missy convinced him and his friend to come over to watch a movie with us. We paired up with our respective crushes and at midnight, I experienced my very first kiss.
Brett Jonas, a senior and four years older than me, had no idea of my inexperience. Before the night ended, I had not only kissed a boy, but had his tongue rolling around in my mouth and his hand up my shirt. I remember asking Missy if I was a slut. She said yes, then threw a pillow at my head.
We went on only one date after that night. A pity date. He took me to dinner and then to an underage dance club, where we sat for an hour, neither one of us dancing. I got the hint we wouldn’t be kissing again, when he ordered a chili dog with onions at dinner.
From my youth group in high school to Hillel in college, I’d always had a social network to meet Jewish men. Then, over the last five years, the herd of available single Jewish men shrank and the opportunities to meet them considerably decreased. Still, by that time, I pledged to only date Jewish men. Since birth, my mom drilled into me the idea that I needed to marry Jewish so that the whole entire race of Jews didn’t die out. That’s a lot of responsibility to carry on my shoulders, but I’d say I’ve carried the burden quite well.
Recently, with my determination to marry before my thirtieth birthday, I’ve been reconsidering my options. After all, I’ve been on JDate for a while now and haven’t met anyone worth a second date. Maybe I should broaden my horizons and date a Christian atheist.
I’ll take it as a sign from God I didn’t automatically erase the speed dating advertisement. God must have meant for me to go to the event, right? In fact, as I registered for the event, I convinced myself I would meet my soul mate next Saturday night. Nothing would stop me from making all my dreams come true.
CHAPTER 8
A Year to Remember Blog
Sara Friedman’s journey to find her soul mate
March 25, 2012 We Represent the Lollipop Guild!
Prepared as I thought I was to begin my search for my soul mate, nothing could have prepared me for the sorry state of the pool of available men I refer to now as the Lollipop Guild. I refuse to mention names, but I can tell you this ladies, always remember to bring a credit card with you on your date. You never know when your date will “lose his wallet.” If your date doesn’t call to tell you he’ll be late or have a very good excuse for his tardiness, don’t bother with the date. It will only go downhill from there.
Guys, when you want to meet and refuse to give your phone number, we know you’re married. Ladies, if he answers his cell phone with a whisper, assume another woman stands near. I don’t understand how a married man can get away with posting a profile. Won’t someone recognize him and tell his wife? The worst offenders by far are the married men who claim they are widowed. It’s bad enough you’re cheating, but to “kill” your wife in the process is unusually cruel.
Tell me, what is the point of online sex? I’ve had a few offers and politely declined each and every one. Apparently, several couples have online sex for months before they go for their first cup of coffee together. That’s what I call safe sex! As for me, I like a little risk in my life-I prefer my sex up close and personal.
Not to say I haven’t met a couple of nice guys through online dating. It’s just that they are few and far between. Still, they give me hope I’ll find the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.
CHAPTER 9
MARCH 31, 2012
DETROIT, MICHIGAN
WEIGHT: 179
STATUS: SINGLE
“I can’t believe you’re dragging me to this thing with you,” complained Missy on the way to my speed-dating event.
“Hey, you’re the one who volunteered to prepare me for it. You have an invested interest. You had to come. Besides, you had nothing better to do tonight.”
Not only had Missy chosen tonight’s ensemble, she insisted on taking me to the salon for a full makeover, just like the wedding. Personally, I wanted to present myself as I usually am, but Missy convinced me the point of tonight’s event was to essentially “sell myself.”
I wore a crimson blouse that plunged low enough to make me feel slightly self-conscious. Missy thought it looked sexy but not trampy. I matched it with a short black skirt and a new pair of high-heeled boots that cost more than all of my other shoes combined.
As I looked in the mirror, another Sara gazed back, one who hadn’t made an appearance since the wedding. That led to thoughts of my mystery man.
In the last month, I’d replayed the kiss over and over. I had hoped he would have revealed himself by now. Surely if he had been interested in pursuing me, he would have called.
That kiss became the kiss to which all kisses would now be measured. I didn’t even know who to give the credit to. Some nights, I’d dream about it. Only it didn’t end at the kiss. The stranger backed me up until we fell onto the couch, his hard body on top of mine. Then, because it was a dream after all, our clothes magically disappeared, and we made love. When I woke from the dream with my heart racing and a pulsing between my legs, I’d reach out for my mystery lover, feeling the loss of him. Then I remembered I don’t even know his identity.
The last time I’d spoken with my brother, I casually asked if anyone mentioned me from the wedding. He laughed and told me everyone there mentioned me because of my toast. Tonight, I’d forget about everything from my past. I’d present an optimistic attitude and carry myself with confidence and dignity.
When the door to the Underground opened, I strolled in with my head held high and smacked into Goldman.
“Are you following me, Sara?”
“What do you mean? Why would I follow you?”
He stood close and he smelled really good. “I’m just kidding, Sara. Relax a little, have a drink.” He noticed Missy standing behind me and I could see surprise on his face.
“I wouldn’t think this would be your scene.”
“It’s not, but ...” She let the sentence just hang without explanation and blushed.
But what?
Goldman nodded.
What did I miss? Why did it seem everyone was keeping a secret from me?
“I’m going to get a drink. I’ll see you both later.” Goldman spun around in a hurry, leaving Missy and I to fend for ourselves.
We hung our coats and proceeded to the check-in table where we ran into Elana, Steffi, and Lisa, three women we knew from our high school days. It’s a small Jewish world after all.
“Is this your first time at speed dating?” Elana eyed my outfit with approval.
“Yeah. What about you?”
 
; The room filled with dozens of singles anticipating the first speed dating round.
“We’re speed dating experts. If you have any questions just ask us.”
Yes, I have a question. If speed dating actually works, then why have you done it enough to become experts? A depressing thought. At least I can feel a tiny bit better about myself. They’re all older than me by a year, and they’re not married either.
Steffi elbowed me in the side. “Isn’t that your old boyfriend?” she asked, pointing to a man in the corner of the room.
There, standing between two of his friends was my high school boyfriend, Jamie Miller. Even hotter than at sixteen, Jamie had filled out since high school. Between his newfound muscles and the other changes in his appearance, I wondered what it would be like to hook up with him again.
Jamie had been my first, and I had been his. We lost our virginity at sixteen, on our one-year anniversary. I’d like to say it was romantic, but honestly, I don’t see how anyone could have an amazing first time. Maybe I’d built it up in my head since I read a bunch of romance novels, but I didn’t get much pleasure out of it. First of all, I don’t think it lasted longer than two minutes.
It had been my idea to have sex. We’d discussed it for months, trying to figure out when would be the best time. I didn’t want to wait, but Jamie wanted to wait until we were both sixteen.
I went on a field trip to Chicago with my choir and bought a condom in a vending machine as a joke with my friends. When I came back from Chicago, Jamie and I were making out in Missy’s bed at her father’s apartment. I decided I didn’t want to wait any longer, so I pulled the condom out of my wallet. Two minutes later, he had taken my virginity.