“H-he’s right.” I stammer, faltering slightly. “I’m ok. I really am.”
I know I don’t even sound convincing but I am honestly willing to do or say anything right now to diffuse the situation. I don’t even care if I have to lie to Cole, I’m prepared to do so if it means he won’t hurt anybody because of me.
What he does next astonishes me. Cole lets go of Jonathan and leans over him, he says something to him which I can’t hear before he approaches over to me. Jonathan stays where he is, a quivering wreck on the floor as he watches us closely.
“Serena, I don’t want you here for any of this.” Cole speaks firmly, turning me around so I’m looking in the opposite direction. “Go home and take care of yourself. Let me deal with him.”
“What are you going to do?” I ask, trembling uncontrollably.
“That doesn’t concern you. I just want you safe.” He repeats himself impatiently, struggling to conceal his rage from me.
“Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why do you even care?”
I gaze up at him, bewildered and perplexed. I can’t even begin to count the number of questions I have and he’s the only one who can provide me with all the answers. The problem is whether or not he will choose to do so.
“Just go.” He reiterates his request decidedly, placing his strong hand on the small of my back. “And don’t worry about any of this, I’ll take care of it. No one is going to say anything to you and no will touch you again. I promise.”
“You can’t promise me that.”
“Yeah, I can.” He states boldly, sounding absolutely certain.
There is still so much I have yet to understand but I can see how desperate Cole is to get me away from here. I know I have to leave if I ever want to uncover the truth about this mysterious boy. A boy I am dangerously infatuated by.
“Please don’t hurt him.” I whisper, making my request gently.
Jonathan must have heard me and jumps up from his position on the ground, tearing down the road in an attempt to reach his car. Cole reacts with lightning speed and takes off after him. I can’t bear to see what happens next and do the exact same thing myself. I turn and run, I run away from it all and don’t even think about looking back.
I hear it though. I hear the sound of Cole catching up to him, slamming him against the hard ground before the punches start to fall. I can hear Jonathan’s cries for help and his pleas for Cole to stop whatever it is he’s doing. My hands cover my ears, frantic in my efforts to block out the dreadful noise.
The further I run, the more distant the wailing seems to be and I soon find myself on my front door step, scrambling around inside my bag as I search for my key. I unlock the door and race up the stairs, throwing myself onto my bed as I let my tears fall.
I weep for hours, or at least that’s what it feels like. I don’t even think I can define one reason behind my tears. I’m so lost, confused, humiliated and afraid. I don’t understand why Jonathan wanted to hurt me and I certainly can’t even begin to comprehend why Cole would want to stop him.
How did he know where I was? Did he follow me from school? Did he watch my altercation with Jonathan from afar and only step in when things got violent? And what the hell did Jonathan mean when he mentioned that Cole had instructed him to stay away from me?
My head is swirling, it feels like it’s about to explode any minute and the only thing I can think of to ease some of the pressure is to close them. I try and concentrate on my breathing instead, remaining focused on the rise and fall of my chest as I inhale deeply and exhale slowly. Its gradual but I finally start to feel my body give to its exhaustion and relax, drifting off into a restless and agitated sleep.
The piercing sound coming from my phone wakes me up several hours later. I sit up in bed, dazed and confused, taking a few moments to figure out where I am and what time of day it is. I quickly realise it’s already night time when I realise how dark it is outside and fumble for my phone with one eye open. It’s at the bottom of my school bag and it takes me a while to find it, growing increasingly frustrated by the second.
“Hello?”
My throat is so dry that my voice sounds hoarse. I try clearing my throat but it’s no use, the one thing I really need right now is a glass of water.
“Serena, are you ok? Where are you?” Lisa asks me, almost frantic.
I can imagine her pacing back and forth in her bedroom, wondering why she hasn’t heard from me since I decided to leave college early.
“Lisa, I’m ok.” I assure her, slowly getting out of bed. “I’ve been asleep since I got home and just woken up.”
“I’ve been so worried about you.” She admits, exhaling loudly.
“There really is no need. You know how tired I was at school earlier, all I wanted to do was come home and take a nap.” I remind her, making my way into the bathroom.
“Serena, that’s not what I’m talking about.” She murmurs softly. “I’m talking about what happened with Cole.”
I freeze at the mention of his name, putting down the empty glass I had reached for in the bathroom cupboard.
“H-how do you even know about that?”
“Look, I don’t quite know how to tell you this but I also know that you would rather hear it from me than anybody else.”
“Tell me what? What are you talking about?” I demand harshly, overwhelmed by my fear and apprehension.
I have no idea what she’s going to say to me but also know I must prepare myself for whatever it is that has caused my best friend to be so anxious.
“Rumours are flying and everyone is talking about it. People are saying that you and Cole are in some sort of secret relationship, that you have been seeing each other since the beginning of the school year.”
“That’s nonsense!” I exclaim loudly, unable to believe that the people from school would actually believe that someone like Cole would be interested in me.
“I know it is but that’s not the worst of what they’re saying…” She explains, leaving her sentence unfinished.
“Go on.” I urge her, closing my eyes.
“Serena, Cole has been arrested. He’s also been suspended from college until further notice. They’re going to hold an official meeting where they decide whether or not he should be excluded permanently.”
“But why?” I protest strongly. “Because he chose to stick up for me? Because he stopped Jonathan from hurting me? What did he do that was so terrible?”
“He put him in the hospital, Serena. Jonathan was picked up in an ambulance and Cole in a police car. It’s serious.” She pauses for a few seconds. “Cole is in a lot of trouble.”
I fall to my knees on the bathroom floor, tightening the firm grip I already have on my phone.
“Because of me.” I whisper, needing time to process the full extent of everything Lisa has just told me.
“No! None of this is your fault and that’s why I wanted to call you before you heard news of anything from anyone else.” She says firmly.
“What are people saying?”
“That’s not important. You know the truth and that’s all that matters.”
I know she’s trying to comfort me but none of it is working. I’m responsible for all of this and now Cole is the one who will pay the price for it.
“I can’t believe this… I can’t believe any of this.” I mumble incoherently, desperately trying to stop my unshed tears from falling.
“Listen, I’ll be there in five minutes, ok? I don’t want you to be alone right now.”
“No! I’m fine. Please don’t come over.” I beg her, scrambling to my feet as I rake my fingers through my hair.
“Serena, I don’t want you to be alone right now.”
“My mum is here.” I lie. “She’s downstairs.”
“Your mum is never home this early.” Lisa states with confidence.
She knows my mum is hardly ever home and that we barely interact with one another when she is.
<
br /> “I know but she is here tonight. She came home from work about an hour ago.”
“How do you know that if you’ve been asleep all this time?” She questions me, reluctant to believe what I’m saying.
“Because I woke up when she came home. I heard the front door when she arrived.”
There’s a moment of silence between us whilst she tries to figure out if I’m telling her the truth or not.
“Ok, I believe you but you’re not exactly going to confide in her about any of this, are you?”
“Of course not, you know what my mum is like.” I remind her.
“Exactly and that’s what I’m trying to say... I want to be there for you and I can’t do that from here.”
“I know you do and I love you for that but all I want to do right now is grab something to eat, have a long soak in the bath and go to bed.”
“Are you sure?” She asks, appearing doubtful and uncertain about the idea of leaving me on my own.
“Yes.” I conclude decidedly. “I really don’t care what people at school are saying about me. So long as you and I know the truth.”
“You’re right.” She replies sweetly, sounding a little more optimistic.
“Thanks for calling, Lisa.”
“There is one more thing I have to warn you about… the police might want to talk to you and I’m sure that the Principal from school will as well. I just want you to be prepared for that.”
“Ok.” I sigh wearily, rubbing the centre of my forehead in an attempt to ease some of the tension that’s building.
“Try and eat something, ok? And I’ll make sure I pick you up in the morning, I don’t like the idea of you walking into college by yourself.”
“Thanks, I’ll see you then.”
“Goodnight, Serena.”
We both hang up and that’s when the reality of what I’ve just been told finally hits me. The house is eerily quiet until I start to feel like the silence might consume me. I start to regret the decision I made about Lisa not coming over and even consider phoning her back. However, I do realise that my friend can’t help me more than she already has done and choose to deal with it by myself instead. I can do this. I really can.
At least that’s what I tell myself…
I go downstairs in the hopes that I will find something to eat but as soon as I go into the kitchen to prepare myself some food, the memory of Cole and spotting him outside my kitchen window comes flooding back to me.
I still can’t believe he’s been arrested. He’s actually in jail right now and for that I am partly responsible. I know I didn’t ask for Jonathan to follow me and I definitely didn’t ask him to try and hurt me in any way but if I hadn’t sent that wretched photograph last year then none of this would have happened. Jonathan and his idiotic friends wouldn’t think so badly of me, they wouldn’t have made my life a living hell for the past twelve months and they certainly would not believe that they have some sort of ‘right’ to me because they now think of me as being easy.
One mistake. I made one loathsome mistake and I’m going to end up paying for it until the day I finally leave this Godforsaken town. That’s the reason why I’m so anxious to go. No one will let me forget about what happened and they probably never will. It’s something that people are always going to use against me and the only solution I can think of is to start again. Once this school year is over and I complete my final year of college… I will finally be free. Free from all of the shame, the guilt and the humiliation that comes with being a young woman who messed up.
The double standards that exist between men and women is beyond a joke. I’m a virgin and have never even come close to having sex in my entire life, yet one picture disproves all of that. I’m no longer respected and neither is my virtue. One decision was all it took to ruin everything and for that, I don’t know whether to despise myself or the people who have caused me to feel this way.
Utterly exhausted and physically drained, I decide to drag my weary body back up the stairs. I really can’t face anything to eat but the idea of a hot bath is something I’m unable to resist.
Immersing myself in the water, I close my eyes and try to rid myself of the intrusive thoughts which keep on trying to disturb my relaxation. I try so hard but the image I have of Cole right before I left him refuses to leave my mind. I decide the only thing I can do for now is go to bed and try to fall asleep. I change into my pyjamas before switching out my bedroom light, hoping that I won’t be awake for too long. I end up tossing and turning for about an hour before I finally give into my body’s desire for sleep.
It’s around three o’clock in the morning when a noise at my bedroom window wakes me up. I could have sworn it sounded like someone was tapping on it or throwing stones, at least that’s what I thought. It’s only when I sit up in bed and check the time on my alarm clock that I hear the same noise again.
Rubbing my tired eyes, I crawl across my bed towards the window and peek through my curtains. At first I don’t see anything but darkness as my eyes take several moments to adjust. When I notice a tall silhouette standing underneath my bedroom window, I quickly come to realise that I was not mistaken, I really did hear something.
Cole.
I scramble for the latch, hurting my fingers in the process. I’m so frantic in my attempt to get it open.
“Why are you here?” I whisper, leaning out my bedroom window.
“I need to speak to you. Please let me in, Green.” He takes a step back, gazing up at me with those magnificent brown eyes of his.
“I thought you had been arrested?”
“I’ll explain everything, I promise.” He assures me. “Just let me come inside.”
I hesitate for a moment, considering what will happen if I give my consent and let him in.
“Ok, meet me at the back door.” I instruct him, closing the window before I make my way downstairs.
I’m so fortunate that my mum isn’t home right now. She’s working the night shift at the hospital and won’t get back until I leave for college in the morning. This is one of the reason I agreed to let Cole inside. I’m unbelievably curious and simply can’t turn down the opportunity to have some time alone with the man who has occupied my thoughts for so long.
I tip toe through the living room and into the kitchen, hastily unlocking the back door before I change my mind.
“Hi, Green.” He smiles softly but remains outside, evidently waiting for me to ask him to come in.
“I can’t believe you’re really here.” I tell him, trembling uncontrollably.
“I had to come.” He replies sincerely. “I need to explain things to you before you hear anything from anyone else.”
His hungry gaze wanders down my body, taking in my black vest top and red shorts. I raced downstairs so fast, I didn’t even think about grabbing anything else to wear before I answered the door to him. Overwhelmed by the feeling of being exposed and entirely self-conscious, I fold my arms across my chest, hoping to preserve some of my modesty from his penetrating stare.
“Please don’t cover up on my account. I quite like the cute little outfit you’re wearing.”
He says it in a playful manner but I can’t help myself from turning bright red by his compliment. I can feel my cheeks burning with embarrassment and decide to change the subject before he takes it one step further and says something else which will increase my heart rate.
“My friend Lisa already called me. She’s the one who told me you were arrested.” I explain, opening the door for him to come inside.
“I see.” He murmurs, walking past me into the living room. “I guess I’m too late then. No doubt you already have a terrible opinion about me and what happened.”
“I would still like to hear your side of it.”
“Really?” He asks me, a hopeful expression on his face.
“Yes.” I respond with certainty, taking a seat at one end of the sofa.
“Thank you.” He replies gratefully, choosing to s
it at the opposite end of the couch. “So… where is your Mum? Is she in bed?”
“No, she’s at work.”
“Does she normally leave you by yourself at night?” He retorts sharply.
“She works as a receptionist in the hospital so I guess I’m just used to it by now.”
“Hmm.”
It’s obvious that he doesn’t approve but I decide not to press the matter him. I have no idea why he would be so concerned about the idea of me being alone. It’s not like he actually cares. He’s ignored me for the past three weeks and now he’s suddenly decided to turn up at my house in the middle of the night.
“How come the police let you go?” I inquire, clasping my hands together.
“They had no choice. The charges against me were dropped.”
“How come?”
“Let’s just say that Jonathan knew what the consequences would be if he chose to press charges against me.” Cole reveals, gazing at me intently.
“You threatened him?” I exclaim incredulously.
“I had no choice. I’d still be in custody if I didn’t.”
He speaks with so much confidence, absolutely certain that he made the right decision.
“How did you even get to see him?” I ask. “Lisa told me he was taken away in an ambulance.”
“It was before the paramedics and the police arrived. I knew that I’d be taken away and had to make sure that they would let me go shortly after.”
There’s a prolonged silence between us as I try to process everything he just said to me. In the end I realise there really is only one thing for me to say and one thing I need to know.
“Why did you do it, Cole?”
“What do you mean why did I do it?” He snaps, glaring at me in anger. “You know why. We both know what that monster is capable of and what he planned on doing to you. I saw it with my own eyes.”
“But you didn’t have to go that far. You really hurt him.”
“I couldn’t control it!” He exclaims loudly, leaving me alone on the sofa. He starts packing back and forth in front of me in frustration, tugging his fingers through his hair. “I saw him hurting you and knew I had to stop him… no matter what that meant.”
That Summer (Part One) Page 5