by Ruff, K. S.
My eyes fell to the floor. “Eleven weeks.”
She nodded and resumed pacing. Suddenly, she stopped again. “I didn’t think you could get pregnant.”
I shook my head. “The doctors said it would be difficult, if not impossible.”
Lexie tried to pull the hair back from her face. When she realized she didn’t have anything to put it in, she began scouring the living room for a hair band. Nate handed her a black scrunchy. She pulled her hair back as her eyes met mine. “He truly loves you.”
“Yes,” I whispered. “He does.”
The conversation stalled when the doorbell rang. Nate went to retrieve the pizza. He brought it straight into the living room, along with some paper plates and napkins. Everyone took a piece of pizza but me. Lexie gave me a disapproving look.
I looked back down at my wine. “I’m sorry. I’m not hungry.”
“You need to eat,” Rafael and Lexie scolded as one.
I took a piece of pizza and picked at it to appease them. I eventually gave up the act. “I’m tired. I would really like to go to bed if that’s okay.”
Lexie set her plate down. She took the pizza from my hand and pulled me to my feet as she wrapped her arms around me. “Of course, honey. Do you want me to lie down with you?”
I shook my head as tears threatened from some bottomless well. “No. I would like some time alone.” I turned toward Rafael. “Promise me you will be here in the morning. I want to see you before you leave.”
Rafael looked exhausted. He reached for my hand and squeezed it gently as he rose from the couch. “I promise, I won’t leave without saying goodbye.”
Lexie pulled me in for another hug. “I love you, Krissy. I’m glad you’re here.”
Nate nodded at me from across the room. “I’ll make sure the security system is set, Kri. You’ll be safe here. Get some rest.”
I patted Annie on the head before walking to the bathroom. Lexie tracked down a toothbrush while I washed the trails of salt that stained my face. I escaped into the guestroom as soon as I was done brushing me teeth. I didn’t want to see anything in the suitcase, so I stripped down to my panties and bra and climbed into bed.
Sleep evaded me. Tears washed over me again and again as I reflected on things Michael said and did. The memories were like a never ending reel of home movies. The pain wound tighter and tighter, and the images wouldn’t stop.
Rafael stepped inside the room an hour later. He handed me a sleeping pill and a glass of water as he sat next to me on the bed. “I thought this might help.”
I scooted up in bed so I could drink the water and swallow the pill. “Thank you,” I responded softly. I set the glass on the nightstand before sinking back into the pillows.
He motioned toward a chair that was entirely too small for him. “Can I sit here until you fall asleep?”
My eyelids were already growing heavy. “I don’t think you’ll be very comfortable in that chair,” I mumbled thickly.
“I’ll be fine. It’s just for a little while.” He didn’t say another word as he folded himself into the chair. I wasn’t sure whether it was the pill or his presence, but the tension that had previously surrounded me eased as I fell asleep.
* * * * * *
Rafael was still sleeping when I woke. He was slouched down in the chair with his legs sprawled out. His left arm was stretched over the bed as he held my hand in his. I stared at his hand covering mine and tried to remember the exact moment he had transitioned from bodyguard to friend. Tears pricked at my eyes. I was dreading Rafael leaving.
He spoke softly from the chair. “You need time to be alone with your family, and I have some things I need to tend to. Will you stay here in Montana?”
I didn’t pull my hand from his. I knew this was our goodbye, and I wanted to maintain the contact for as long as I could. I studied his face while I thought about the question. “No. I have some unfinished business in DC. After that… I don’t know.”
He nodded. “Don’t hesitate to use the money, Kristine. That’s what it’s there for. Michael will find some comfort in knowing that he is helping you rebuild your life, and he’ll want some assurance that you’re someplace safe.”
I closed my eyes against the pain that followed his name.
Rafael squeezed my hand. “You have my number programmed into your phone from Saint-Tropez. You’ll transfer that phone number to your new phone when you purchase it?”
I was still lying on my stomach, so I nodded against the pillow. “I don’t know how to say goodbye to you, Rafael. You are such a good friend. You have seen me through so much. How will I ever repay you?”
He leaned forward in the chair as he brought my hand to his lips. “You don’t repay friends,” he said. “You’ll call me when you need me?”
I nodded.
He tightened his hold on my hand. “I want to hear you say it. Promise me, Kristine. You’ll call me when you need me.”
Our eyes met. My breath caught when I saw the pain reflected in his eyes. I wasn’t the only one having a hard time saying goodbye. I choked back a sob. “Yes, Rafael. I promise to call when I need you. Are you returning to Paris?”
He nodded. “For a short time. I have some things I need to take care of there. After that…” He shrugged as his voice trailed off.
The vice around my heart cinched a little tighter when I realized we might never see each other again. I squeezed my eyes tight, hoping to delay the tears.
He was still holding my hand when he rose from the chair. He pulled me from the bed and wrapped me in his arms. He stood there, holding me, for a very long time, seemingly oblivious to the fact that I was dressed only in my panties and bra.
I took a deep breath as I relaxed into his arms. I inhaled his cedar and clove scented cologne, which reminded me so much of Michael. I tried to memorize the feel of his body holding mine, since I hadn’t had that opportunity with his brother. Tears streamed down my face when I finally pulled away. I slipped Michael’s engagement ring off my finger and placed it in his hand. “I think you should give this to Michael…” I paused, absorbing the pain of my own words, “since we aren’t getting married.”
Rafael’s jaw clenched as he stared down at the ring. He appeared conflicted about accepting the ring but eventually shoved it inside his pocket. His fingers caressed my cheek as he gently raised my chin. “My brother’s a fool,” he rasped as he kissed first one cheek and then the other. He closed his eyes as his forehead fell against mine. Then his mouth brushed softly against my lips. “Be safe, Kristine.” It was the last thing he said.
I heard Rafael gather his things from the other room before he left the house. I battled the urge to follow him as I sank onto the bed and curled in on myself. Sleep found me in tears.
Lexie crept into my room a few hours later. She smoothed the hair from my face as she handed me a tissue. “He’s gone?”
“Yes,” I whispered hoarsely.
“He loves you,” she murmured, a little lost in thought.
I shook my head. “Not like that,” I insisted, “more like a brother.”
Lexie crawled over me and settled on the other side of the bed. She wrapped her arms around me as I turned to face her. “Oh, Krissy. What am I going to do with you?”
* * * * * *
Lexie called in sick so she could lie in bed with me the entire day. I poured out every last detail from the past six months, and she absorbed it all without judgment, like only Lexie could.
She went to work the next morning, but she came back home at noon. It took me that long to pull myself from bed and shower, so her absence went unnoticed for the most part. I had just curled up on the couch with her dog, Annie, when I heard her key in the door.
Lexie held up a bag from Taco Johns as she walked into the living room. “Comfort food,” she said.
A small smile tugged at my lips. “Remember how we used to sneak out of high school at lunch so we could eat super nachos from Taco Johns?”
Lexie chuckled softly as
she pulled two plastic containers from the bag. “How could I forget? We snuck out for nachos three days a week.”
Lexie flipped through a number of television shows while we picked at the food. She was still wearing her scrubs from the hospital. I was wrapped in a blanket because I was wearing a dress that had left me feeling chilled. The maid didn’t have a clue what kind of clothes to pack for Montana, so she had apparently packed what she believed to be my favorite things.
I was drifting off to sleep when a knock sounded at the door. Lexie’s eyebrows knit together. “Who could possibly be dropping by this time of day?”
I shrugged. “Maybe it’s a salesman?”
We continued watching television.
We exchanged looks when the door bell rang. Again, we chose to ignore the interruption.
Lexie scowled when the knocking grew more insistent. I sat up on the couch and pulled the blanket around my shoulders when she crossed into the foyer to answer the door.
Lexie’s eyes were wide as she rounded the corner from the foyer. Kadyn strode in behind her with a determined look on his face.
I gasped. “Kadyn? How did you know I was here?”
Kadyn stopped in the center of the living room. Lexie hovered in between the two of us. She seemed uncertain about where to go.
Kadyn’s eyes hardened as he folded his arms across his chest. “Well, it wasn’t because you took the time to call and let me know,” he bit out sarcastically. “I had to find out from a customs agent in New York.”
Guilt nipped at me even as I defended my actions. “I just got here. I needed a few days to pull myself together before I started calling people. My parents don’t even know I’m here.”
Lexie shot me an apologetic look. “I called your parents last night. They’re driving up tomorrow morning for Thanksgiving. I’m sorry. I should have told you earlier.”
My jaw dropped.
Kadyn’s cell phone rang. He glanced at the Caller ID, then answered the call as he fixed his eyes on mine. “Hi, Mrs. Stone. I’m sorry. My phone was turned off. I was on a plane. Yes. Yes, I know. She’s sitting in front of me right now. Yes. I’m in Montana. I just got here a few minutes ago… I don’t know if I’ll be here tomorrow. We’ll see. Can I call you later?” He paused for a minute while he listened to my mom speak. Still his eyes didn’t stray from mine. “Do you mind if I talk with her first? I’ll ask her to call you as soon as I’m done.”
Fear coursed through me as Kadyn disconnected the call.
Kadyn’s jaw clenched as he continued studying me. “Why are you here, Kristine?”
I glanced nervously at Lexie. “I had no place else to go.”
Kadyn shook his head. “That’s bullshit, and you know it.”
My temper flared. “I couldn’t exactly show up on your doorstep after sending that letter, now could I?”
Pain, then anger flitted across his face. “Where’s Garcia?”
“In Paris. He insisted I leave, so I came here. I didn’t have time to call ahead or make plans, Kadyn. I was on a plane within minutes of Michael telling me to leave. My parents live over an hour away from the nearest airport, and I had no clue what time of night we’d be flying in.”
“Who’s we?” Kadyn demanded. “You said we would be flying in.”
“Rafael. Michael’s brother. He was my bodyguard… and my friend,” I choked out. I was no longer certain who Rafael was to me. “He’s already gone back to Paris.”
Storm clouds swirled through Kadyn’s dark eyes. “Did he hurt you?”
I opened my mouth to speak, but my jaw snapped back shut. I couldn’t answer the question. Michael had never hit me, and yet… I was in excruciating pain.
“Kristine,” Kadyn warned in a low, rumbling tone. “Why do you look like that?”
“Like what?” I asked, honestly thrown by the question.
His voice rose. “Wrecked, Kristine… and emaciated. My God, what did he do to you?”
Lexie was suddenly in Kadyn’s face. “Stop it, Kadyn. Don’t you dare talk to my cousin like that. She’s been through hell. She doesn’t need you to browbeat her on top of everything else.”
I looked down and tried to see what Kadyn was seeing. The blanket had slipped off my shoulders. I studied my arms and hands curiously. They didn’t even look like they belonged to me. “It’s not what you think,” I said. “He didn’t hurt me, physically. He wasn’t starving me for God’s sake. I was sick. I was sick, and I couldn’t keep anything down. I ended up in the hospital…” My voice trailed off as images of the fountain and the attacker robbed me of all remaining thoughts.
Lexie knelt in front of me. “Kri, look at me. You don’t have to do this right now. Take a few more days to recover, then talk to Kadyn. You can talk after he’s calmed down, when things aren’t so raw for you. Please, honey. I’m afraid you might end up back in the hospital. You aren’t ready to do this.”
My gaze shifted from Lexie to Kadyn.
Kadyn’s face grew determined as he stood his ground. “I have been looking for you for six months, Kristine. I deserve an explanation.”
I looked back down at Lexie.
She closed her eyes and settled on her knees in front of me. When she opened her eyes, she encouraged me to focus on her. “Just look at me,” she whispered. “Just say it like you said it to me. It’s just you and me, Kri.”
A single tear slid down my cheek. I nodded as Lexie reached for my hands. I fixed my eyes on hers and took a deep breath. “Michael turned some investors and a terrorist group over to the Portuguese government when he discovered the firm he was working for was laundering and investing their money. The terrorists lost billions when the government froze their accounts. Two general partners escaped prosecution. One of them tried to drown me a few weeks ago. That’s how I ended up in the hospital.”
My entire body began to tremble. Lexie strengthened her hold on my hands. She nodded, encouraging me to continue. “Jean, a different bodyguard, was assigned to me that day. He nearly died trying to save me. When Michael and Rafael returned home, the man was strangling me. He had me pinned beneath the water in the fountain.” I pulled my hand from Lexie’s and felt my neck. I could still feel the painful bruises he had left behind.
I closed my eyes as I folded in on myself. “I’ll never forget his face. It was so twisted in hate…” I trailed off as I waited for my head to clear. I slowly opened my eyes. “Rafael broke the man’s neck when he pulled him off me. Michael and Rafael forced the water from my lungs and performed CPR until I was breathing again. I woke up in the hospital a few days later.”
I swiped at the tears that had moistened my face. I looked into Lexie’s blue eyes but saw Michael’s brown instead. My voice was barely a whisper. “I was pregnant... with a girl. Michael named her Genevieve. She died when I was attacked. Michael was devastated. He put a new sculpture up...” I sobbed as I clutched my stomach. “It was Genevieve. She was watering the flowers and playing with a butterfly in the middle of the fountain.”
I rocked gently. “I wanted that baby. I wanted to stay, but Michael sent me away. He said he couldn’t keep me safe. He said they’d come for him and kill me. They’re going to kill him, and I didn’t even get to say goodbye.” I collapsed in Lexie’s arms as I burst into tears.
I never saw Kadyn walk away.
* * * * * *
Lexie told me she found Kadyn crying in their driveway, shortly after she gave me a sleeping pill and settled me in bed. She asked Kadyn to come back inside the house and offered him the guest room, but he told her he needed time to process everything. He was feeling betrayed by the fact that I chose to stay with Michael, that I agreed to marry him, and had been pregnant with his child. I don’t think Lexie was supposed to tell me that part, but she did.
Lexie managed to convince Kadyn to come over for Thanksgiving dinner, despite the uncertainty surrounding our relationship. She hadn’t been planning to host Thanksgiving dinner, since she’d been planning to spend the holiday wi
th me in Paris; but by the time I crawled out of bed the next morning, Lexie had already been grocery shopping, and Nate was putting a twenty-five pound turkey in the oven.
Lexie’s parents and sisters arrived in town midmorning. Thankfully, Lexie had already told them about what happened to me so I wouldn’t have to repeat the story. Everyone politely avoided the topic, although we still found ourselves in tears when they hugged me and welcomed me home.
Lexie corralled all the women into the kitchen, and suddenly there was a flurry of activity. My Aunt Linda diced onions and celery for the dressing while my cousin, Corina, cranked out homemade rolls. My cousin, Tiffany, pulled together the sweet potatoes while I made mashed potatoes. Lexie threw together a green bean casserole and then darted back and forth between the kitchen and dining room while she set the table. Annie wove between our legs and happily served as honorary taste tester. With all the knives and glass flying around, it was a wonder any of us survived the morning without injury.
My parents showed up with pumpkin and apple pies in hand shortly after noon. There was a brief lull in the kitchen activities while we exchanged tears and hugs. My aunt and cousins slipped silently from the room so I could speak with my parents alone. Although it was the third time I had relayed what happened in Paris, I didn’t find it any easier to relive. My parents handled the news much better than I anticipated. I suspected, as parents, they could endure just about anything as long as I was alive and in their arms.
Kadyn arrived at three o’clock. I hung back and watched as my mother and father hugged him long and hard. I could see that my disappearance had strengthened the bond between them. Kadyn had only been around my parents twice before… when Lexie was rejecting her transplanted kidney and shortly after Kadyn rescued me in Trout Lake. Given the seriousness of those events and my recent kidnapping, it shouldn’t have surprised me that Kadyn had become a member of my family, but it did. Nate, my aunt, uncle, and cousins hugged and welcomed Kadyn, drawing him further into the room.
I was the last one to stand before him. I was too scared to reach for a hug. I doubted Kadyn wanted me touching him after what he had learned yesterday. Finally, I gathered enough courage to look him in the eyes. “Thank you for coming, Kadyn. I’m glad you’re here.”