Here and Now

by T. Renee Fike

  “You may want to, but I wouldn’t wait too long,” she says.

  “It can’t be too long, the semester is almost over and I’ll be back at home, so will Evan.”

  “So you have less than three weeks to figure it out.”

  “Great,” I say, not thinking how my brother would react. He’s not going to be happy. I’m his sister and Evan’s his best friend.

  “Talk to Evan, you don’t want him telling your brother before you get the chance,” she says bluntly.

  “You’re right; I’ll talk to Evan tonight.”

  “He coming here or are you going over there?”

  “His place,” I say, like it’s no big deal. No point in making her feel out of place in our tiny dorm room.

  “At least summer is coming and you can hang out with him at home.”

  “I know, I’m really excited,” I practically shout to the world. Dani starts laughing, clearly happy for me.

  Evan sent me a text saying he’d come pick me up, I replied back saying not to worry, I can walk, it’s not far and I’m looking forward to the cold, brisk air.

  I head out around 7:45 p.m. and make sure I’m bundled up as I make the short walk. I could drive, but there’s limited space in the driveway to his frat house, so it’s frowned upon. The dorms aren’t that far away, so there’s no issue with the short walk.

  The closer I get to the house the clearer I hear voices; voices of Lily and Evan.

  Knowing they can’t see me, I make sure I’m hidden by some of the cars, trying to figure out what on Earth they could be arguing about.

  Lily is flailing her arms, looking angry beyond belief, while Evan looks annoyed, yet calm. He tells her to mind her own business and that he’s not a concern of hers. She starts yelling about how she loves him and how could he do this to her? I make sure I’m hidden behind one of the cars in the driveway, hoping like hell she doesn’t see me. The last thing I want to do is deal with a crazy, upset Lily.

  I watch as Evan grabs his phone from his pocket, obviously checking his message seeing that I said I was on my way. He looks around, but I’m hidden, so he can’t see me.

  He tries to get Lily to leave and finally she does. Evan continues standing outside, clearly waiting for me. I wait until Lily is completely out of sight before moving from behind the parked vehicle.

  “Hey,” I say as I walk towards Evan.

  “Hey babe, I take it you saw Lily,” he says as a statement, not a question.

  “Yeah, she definitely didn’t look happy.”

  “She’s fucking crazy,” he says, not surprising me anymore.

  “I take it she found out about us?” I ask, thoroughly surprised because we just decided that last night and the only people that really know are Evan and I and possibly a few of his frat brothers.

  “No, she doesn’t have a clue. She heard I was hanging out with someone, but she doesn’t know it’s you,” he states.

  “That’s good; she’d probably go crazy right about now.”

  “No shit, she is fucking bat-shit crazy.”

  “She’s always been in love with you,” I tell him.

  “No, she’s fucking obsessed, there’s a huge difference,” he says, sounding completely annoyed. “Enough talk about her, I want to enjoy my night with you,” he says as he wraps me up in a hug.

  We head inside and to his room. I remove my coat, scarf, and boots before climbing into bed with him; snuggling into his side.

  “Oh, there’s something I want to talk to you about.”

  “Owen?” he asks, knowing me way too well.

  “Yeah.”

  “What are you thinking?” he asks.

  “I think we should wait until we go home to tell him about us. I’m not sure how he would take it and I don’t want it to mess with his therapy,” I say truthfully.

  “I agree.”

  “Do you think he’s going to flip out?” I ask, looking up at him.

  “I think he’s going to be pissed. He loves you, you’re his baby sister and yeah I’m his best friend, but you’re his sister, no guy is good enough for you.”

  “That’s not true,” I defend.

  “It is, he’s told me numerous times that no guy will ever be good enough for you. I just hope he doesn’t hate me,” Evan says, sounding a little unsure.

  “He won’t hate you and if he’s upset, he will get over it. Like you said, you’re his best friend, he can’t hate you forever,” I smile. Plus I wouldn’t let Owen do that.

  “We’ll see.”

  “Who knows, he could surprise us and be completely on board with us and be happy for us,” I smile, thinking as optimistic as possible.

  He starts to laugh, “Keep dreaming babe, keep dreaming.”

  We spend the rest of the evening hanging out, and of course, exploring one another’s body’s better than before. I can’t help but want to lick every single inch of him and I’m going to, it’s definitely on my list of things to do with him sexually.

  For the next few weeks, between studying for finals, packing, hanging out with Dani and seeing Evan, my schedule has been so jam packed; I have no time for anything else.

  Evan tried to get us to carpool home, but I have my car, so that wasn’t an option. At least I don’t have to carpool with Lily because her parents ended up bringing her car down here for her, because we weren’t talking. I can only imagine how it would go, she would complain and bitch about Evan and whoever he’s possibly seeing the entire ride, not knowing it’s me.

  Thankfully, for the past three weeks, Evan and I were able to keep our relationship under wraps. Being back at home, I’m sure Lily will eventually find out, but I want Owen to hear it from us first and not someone else, and certainly not out of spite.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Driving home, I have time to think and figure out how I want to tell Owen about Evan and I. Evan wants us to do it together, but I think it would be best if he heard it from me first.

  The drive doesn’t take forever, though I wish it would have taken longer. Before I know it, I’m pulling into the driveway. I grab a few bags and head inside, hearing voices right away.

  Owen is yelling and my mom is telling him to calm down. This is lovely. I head toward their voices and find them obviously working on his therapy. He’s standing up, holding bars, sweat is pouring off of him. I want to run and help him, but I know he needs to do this on his own.

  I stand there and watch as he attempts to move his legs a few times, moving only centimeters, but it’s something and that’s something to be proud of.

  When they finally call it a day, Owen notices me at the door. “How long have you been standing there?” he asks, sounding frustrated.

  “Only a few minutes,” I say, not wanting him to get pissed for me being there.

  “It’s a work in progress,” he says as mom helps him back into his wheelchair.

  “I know, but you’re doing awesome and you should be so proud of yourself. You were standing, that’s huge,” I praise him.

  “Yeah, I got that part down, now if I could just get my legs to cooperate and move with me, I’d be even better.”

  “You’ll get there,” I say, hopeful for him.

  I come into the living room and I take a seat, leaving my bags at the bottom of the stairs.

  “Sweetie, did you unload your car?” Mom asks.

  “No, just grabbed a few bags, I’ll get the rest later,” I say before she heads out of the room. She nods her head, but doesn’t say anything.

  “How’s it feel to be done with your first year of college?” Owen asks.

  “Great and I can’t believe it’s over, it seems like it went so fast.”

  “It does, so make sure to enjoy every second of it,” he says.

  “You’re going to go back to school Owen,” I say, wanting him to not give up.

  “I know, but it won’t be the same and that’s okay. Right now, walking is more important to me.”

  “I get that. So it seems l
ike mom is helping and around more,” I say, noticing she was the one helping him in therapy and not a therapist.

  “She helps me on the weekends, the therapist is only here during the week,” he informs me.

  “That’s quality time with mom, that has to feel good,” I say, knowing how much she was never around for us before.

  “Yeah, mom and dad have been amazing actually. They both help and try to do whatever’s necessary to get me back on my feet. You think something’s up because it’s like they aren’t our parents at all,” he jokes.

  “I’m glad they are finally acting the way they always should have, it just sucks it took an accident for it to happen,” I state truthfully.

  “Yeah it does, but hopefully, they stay the way they are now after I’m walking.”

  “Time will tell,” I say.

  “So, fill me in, what’s going on with you?” he asks, changing the subject.

  “Not much, just glad to be home for the summer. I’m ready for a break from school.”

  “Oh yeah, anything else you want to tell me?” he asks, catching me off guard. The way he’s looking at me, makes me believe he already knows, but how? “Tell me Bay, I can see something’s going on, it’s written all over your face.”

  “I, umm…” I start stuttering.

  “Baylee, what’s going on?” he asks, looking serious.

  I take a deep breath, “There’s something I need to tell you, but I don’t want you to overreact.”

  “What is it?” he asks sternly.

  “I’m dating someone,” I say quietly.

  “Why the fuck would I care about that?” he says, catching me a bit off guard.

  “Because of who I’m dating,” I say, now feeling really nervous.

  “Do I know him?” he asks.

  “You do,” I say hesitantly.

  “Who is it?” he asks, I stare at him, unsure how to tell him who. “Baylee, who the fuck is it?” he snaps, causing me to jump.

  “Evan,” I whisper.

  “What?” he roars, I can’t even look at him, because he is beyond pissed. “What the fuck do you mean you’re dating Evan?”

  “I wanted you to hear it from me, he wanted you to hear it from the both of us, because we didn’t want you to freak out, like you are,” I say, looking directly at him now.

  I feel like a scared little girl, where normally my brother would protect me, but it’s his look that has me scared shitless.

  “You are not dating Evan,” he scolds.

  “Yes I am,” I say, sounding nowhere near as strong as I wish I did.

  “How long?” he demands.

  “A few weeks.”

  “It ends now,” he shouts before pulling out his cell phone.

  “Owen stop,” I say, finally finding my voice, “We are both adults, we made this choice together. I want you to accept it. He’s your best friend, I’m your sister, and you know him.”

  “Exactly, which is why this isn’t happening,” he yells as he continues to text on his phone.

  “What are you doing?” I ask, demanding he tell me.

  “Telling him to get his ass over here,” he states, never looking in my direction.

  “Owen, he’s driving back from school, let him go home and unpack and see his family before you decide to rip into him. You shouldn’t even be mad,” I defend.

  “Not mad, how do you figure I shouldn’t be mad? Bay, you’re telling me your dating my best friend, don’t you see how wrong that is?” he says, sounding completely disgusted.

  “I’ve always liked Evan, hell everyone did, but we’ve talked for months when we were carpooling and I truly got to know him for him, not as just your best friend,” I say, standing my ground.

  “So my accident caused you two to date?” he asks, looking appalled.

  “No, but it allowed us to get to know each other, we talked, that’s it for months and months. He wanted to make sure his feelings were real for me before even telling me how he felt, because he values your friendship and didn’t want to mess that up.”

  “Then he should have talked to me,” he snaps, not cooling off any.

  “Seriously Owen,” I shout, angry that he’s acting like a child. “I’m a grown adult, I am quite capable of making choices for myself, and so is Evan. We like each other, we hung out, got to know one another, and decided to date, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.”

  He shakes his head, looking more irate by the minute, “You need to break it off with him before it goes too far,” he orders.

  “No, I will not,” I defend.

  “Baylee, I’m not giving you a choice, you will break up with him and we will forget this ever happened,” he says sternly.

  I stand up, angry for how he’s acting, “I’m sorry that you don’t agree with this, but this isn’t your choice to make. I’m not breaking up with Evan.”

  He continues to shake his head as I walk out of the room, not wanting to have this conversation anymore. I grab my bags and head upstairs, and then shoot a text to Evan letting him know that my brother’s pissed.

  He responds, informing me he knows based on the text messages he’s received from Owen already. Great and I actually thought that Owen would have been okay with us, what was I thinking?

  An hour later I head back downstairs, hoping that Owen has calmed down. By the time I reach the bottom of the stairs I hear Owen’s voice and clearly he has not calmed down.

  “I told you to watch out for my sister, not fucking date her,” I hear him say. I peak around the corner to see Evan sitting on the couch in front of him.

  “I didn’t just date your sister, it’s not like that with her,” Evan defends.

  I want to rush in and defend our relationship with Evan, but I’m also interested to hear what he has to say.

  Owen starts shaking his head, his hands in fists, “You fucking slept with her, didn’t you?” he shouts, looking like he’s ready to murder someone; Evan being that someone right now.

  “It’s not like that man, you know me, and I would never do that with your sister. I would never just have sex with her, I know what she means to you,” Evan says kindly.

  “Then what the fuck are you doing dating her?” he yells.

  “I like your sister, I really like her. We’ve talked, hung out, man, I’m serious, I wouldn’t have pursued anything with her if there wasn’t something there,” Evan defends.

  “How the hell do you expect me to be happy with this?” Owen says, his voice coming down a few notches.

  “Because you know me and I’m not out to hurt her, you have to trust me.”

  “I did, but not if you’re with my sister, I don’t.”

  “You told me to look out for her, I did; no I didn’t know feelings would become the way they have, but they did, and I’m happy, your sister makes me happy man.”

  “I want to punch you in the face right now,” Owen says, not holding back.

  “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for it to happen, but it did,” Evan says softly. I watch as Evan doesn’t look at Owen, he looks towards the floor, “Ever since your accident, I look at life differently. I don’t take anything for granted and I choose to live in the here and now, I want to enjoy life and that includes your sister.”

  “I can’t fucking believe you, you’re my best friend, you can’t date my fucking sister,” Owen scolds.

  Evan continues to look at the floor, “If you want me to break things off with her, I will,” he says in almost a whisper.

  Me standing outside the door, I’m ready to rush in and scold my brother, wanting him to mind his own business and to let me be happy.

  “So then I look like the asshole?” Owen says, making Evan’s head snap up, “You slept with my sister, if you break up with her now, then it’s my fault and then I’ll never hear the end of it. Fuck,” he says, as he runs his hands through his hair, “I hate this.”

  “I swear it’s different with her, we get along great man, and she’s perfect.”


  “Do not talk about my sister like that to me. You two date, and I don’t want to know any of the fucking details. When we hang out its guy time, got it?” Owen says, surprising the hell out of me.

  “Absolutely,” Evan says quickly, “I can separate the two, I promise.”

  “You can come in nosey shit,” Owen says, calling me out.

  I walk in the living room with a smile on my face; I should have known he would know I was there, “Everything okay?” I ask with a smirk as I walk over to the two of them.

  “You already heard the conversation, I know you. These are my rules,” he says as he points to the couch, “Take a seat,” he instructs. I do as I’m told, sitting down beside Evan. “First, there will be no kissy shit in front of me, or while hanging out with me; two, neither one of you are going to talk to me about your problems, because you will have a fight somewhere along the line, I don’t want to hear about it,” he says bluntly, and three, so help me God, if you two ever try to have sex when I’m around I will kill you both,” he says, causing us to laugh. When Owen doesn’t laugh we both stop immediately, realizing he’s serious. “Agree?” he asks.

  “Yes,” Evan and I say in unison.

  The three of us end up hanging out and following the rules that Owen has set, it’s the least we could do, especially right now.

  Later that evening, I call Dani and fill her in, she couldn’t be happier for me, which is awesome. She asked if Lily knew, but I’m not worrying about her, there’s no point. She’s going to be pissed, jealous, whatever, but her opinion doesn’t matter, it doesn’t count anymore. I’m allowed to be happy and so is Evan.

  Three months later, summer’s over and I’m heading back to school. I want to take my car, so I’m driving, which means that Evan and I can’t carpool. Things are going great with him and I couldn’t be happier.

  Our relationship is amazing, Owen is able to stand us kissing here and there in front of him and holding hands, but that’s it and that’s okay with me.

  I hug my brother and mom before packing my car and leaving for school. Owen’s therapy is progressing, he’s able to take a few steps when he’s holding on and he’s getting stronger by the day. He’s determined though, so I know he will walk again on his own.