by Mj Fields
* * *
She woke up and went to the bathroom. When she walked out Collin was standing there. She did her best to not cry.
���You left your phone on the bed,��� Collin handed it to her.
���Thank you��� she took it, and her lip started to quiver.
���You need to come home.���
���No.���
���Tessa you hurt me, I reacted badly. Come home.���
���Do you still love me?���
���Of course!���
���Are you still mad?���
���Yes,��� he admitted.
���Then I want to give you your space,��� she walked by and upstairs.
He stood not knowing what to do. He walked into her room.
���Now I���m pissed, and if you don���t come home Tessa������ he shook his head.
���What Collin?��� she snapped at him.
���It will break me,��� he walked out.
* * *
Tessa heard him pull out and got up and dressed, and went home. He wasn���t there.
She went and grabbed blankets and a pillow and lay on the nursery floor snuggled up with Leia and fell asleep.
She woke up to him picking her up, and he carried her to their room.
���Collin I���m sorry.���
���I know,��� he covered her up and started walking out the door.
���Please don���t go,��� she said.
He stopped and took a deep breath and walked back and looked at her. He sat on the bed and lay back, crossing his arms over his chest. She rolled over and hugged him. He didn���t move, and she took his arms and wrapped them around her and fell asleep.
When she woke he was in the shower, and she got in with him.
���Good morning.���
���Good morning,��� he quickly got out.
After her shower she went down and made breakfast. She walked in office and handed him a plate.
���Thank you.���
She sat at her desk across from his and worked on some more funding applications. She checked her email and sent another asking the World Health Organization to be considered as a grant recipient.
She walked out and got a drink and grabbed him a glass of water. She gave it to him, and he thanked her.
Her phone rang, and it was Phoebe.
���Sure, can you bring him here?���
Tessa hung up the phone and stood to walk out.
���Phoebe has a doctor appointment, and Remington is coming to visit for a couple hours.���
���Alright,��� he said without looking up.
* * *
Tessa danced, sang, and played on the floor with Remington. She made lunch with him in her arms and brought Collin his.
���Thank you.���
���You���re welcome,��� she said in a mocking tone.
She walked away, and he watched her.
When he was finished, he brought out the dishes and set them in the sink. She was on the couch holding Remington and falling asleep with him on her chest.
Collin stood and watched them she looked up, ���You’re tired, let me take him, and you can rest.���
���I���m not going to see him for a few weeks, I want to hold him, you can sit with us if you want,��� she offered.
���You���re not supposed to sleep holding a baby. I can take him.���
���No, thank you, but I would love for you to sit with us, you know just in case I fall asleep,��� she continued rubbing Remington���s back.
He sat next to her, and she leaned her back against his arm. He didn���t move. She started dozing off, and he put his arm behind her and wrapped it around Remington. She lay back against his chest.
���Okay, I am tired, you should take him,��� she said.
���I���ve got him, go to sleep,��� looked down at her briefly
He moved his leg behind her so that she was laying on him and his hand held Remington���s back.
���I���m sorry Collin.���
Phoebe came in and took a picture ���Don���t wake her up. How���s she doing?���
���She and the babies are good,��� he said looking down at her.
���What did you just say?��� Phoebe gasped.
���Nothing��� I was supposed to, damn it,��� he said, and she laughed.
���I talked to Jade yesterday. I know what happened, and it was not her intention to hurt you Collin. She loves you, and I can promise you she doesn���t like to hurt anyone especially you. She just needs to figure out how to not care so much. But between you and I, I hope she doesn���t change who she is. I don���t think anyone of us would love her half as much. Has she told you about my past?��� he shook his head no. ���How about Ryan or Becca or Lucas?���
���Some I guess,��� he said.
���Probably about Lucas but not the rest of us. She always says it���s not my story to tell,��� Phoebe smiled, ���The entire time she was with him, and all the things that broke her heart, she didn���t stop being kind. She made Alex promise to be nice, not because she wanted Lucas back but because she wanted him to have love in his life. All the things she went through she chose, not to burden anyone with because she didn���t want to share her hurt with anyone. She���s strong Collin, but not invincible. She tells you everything: her thoughts, her feelings, and when she feels she���s screwed up. That is a first for her. My father shot my mother and then himself in front of me, I moved from foster home to abusive foster home until I came here. She never told her brother about the problems I had until I was ready to do it myself. She���s loyal and as trustworthy as they come. Don���t be mad at her, or piss on her leg marking her as yours, by the way Lucas actually did that. Be her partner, her friend, her protector, whatever, but accept her for who she is because I know she���s pretty wonderful.���
Tessa started to move and opened her eyes and stretched sitting up.
���Hey Phoebe, Alex was right about the superior genetics thing he���s so smart and so perfect,��� she laughed, ���So how long was I out?���
���Not long,��� Phoebe said and hugged her.
���Long enough for me to screw up though.���
���Why what happened?��� Tessa asked concerned.
���I told Phoebe that you and the babies were doing great,��� he looked down.
���I won���t tell,��� Phoebe hugged her.
���I know, I love you.���
���What are you two doing tomorrow night for New Year���s Eve?��� Phoebe asked.
���I haven���t even thought about it, we always just������ she stopped.
���It���s Lucas���s birthday,��� Phoebe said. ���So we���ve always celebrated both.���
���Well, time to make new traditions,��� Tessa smiled at Phoebe. ���Why don���t we think about it and call you later. I think he���s going to wake up and want some of his Mommy’s juice,��� she got up and walked them out and carried the diaper bag to the car.
She walked into the house and started cleaning up the kitchen.
���I wish you would let me get someone to come in and take care of the house,��� Collin said.
���No, thank you, it took five minutes I think I can manage. Besides it gives me something to do other than walk around here feeling like,��� she stopped and walked passed him. ���Never mind.���
&n
bsp; She sat at her desk and read her emails and smiled.
���You look pleased,��� he walked over and looked over her shoulder.
���I am, I���ve been working on this for a month. I will forward it to you.��� Tessa typed a response and hit send.
She stood up and smiled and walked out the door.
She was sweeping the entry when he came out.
���Tessa that���s amazing do you know how many people you just helped by getting that grant? I���m not just talking about our upcoming trip I am talking about the next year. We have tried for years to get this, congratulations,��� he hugged her.
���Thank you,��� she said and pulled away, ���I���m very persistent.���
He took a deep breath and watched her wash off the counters.
���Where did you put the scales?���
He laughed, ���In the garage, why?���
���I want them back,��� she went out to find them.
���I will get them for you,��� he said following her.
���No, I can do it myself,��� she climbed up and grabbed them.
She got down refusing his hand and walked into the house and up the stairs. She stood on the scales and was relieved that she had only gained a pound more.
He stood in the bedroom, ���Are you going to nap?���
���Are you going to stop following me around being���? I don���t know, helpful,��� she yelled and then laughed.
���No.���
���Then yes, I���m going to sleep so that I don���t have to look at you and feel like shit about stupid hormonal concerns,��� she pulled the covers over her head.
���Tessa,��� he said as he climbed in. ���I don���t understand all these feelings. But I know I���ve made you feel bad for a couple days now, and I���m sorry for that.���
���Collin��� for someone so brilliant, you���re being an idiot. You understand feelings. You took care of a monster for years because you felt obligated. You loved your brother and sister enough to kill for them. You say and show me you love me all the time, well��� the past two days haven���t been all that perfect, but better than I���m used to. So really��� can you not understand why the person I lived with for four years that I planned to marry still means enough to me to have a concern for? God ��� if we get divorced do you think I won���t care what happens to you?��� she said. ���I need to sleep, I���m sure that these babies have enough to deal with right now. I need them happy and I���m happy when I sleep.���
���This was an apology Tessa, not a way to make you feel worse. Again I���m sorry, but before you go to sleep I want you to know that I had no intentions of divorcing you, I have no idea why that was even brought into this.���
���I don���t want a divorce ��� I love you,��� she said.
He lay down next to her and held her. ���I���m not going anywhere, this has to stop, I love you, go to sleep.���
She turned over and wrapped her arms around him. ���Please just tell me what you need from me. Tell me, so I don���t mess this up.���
���I need you to be you: the person I love and I need you to continue talking to me about everything, regardless of what it is. We���re married and we love each other, and I don���t want you to change. I just want you to be a little less ��� angry.���
She cuddled up to him and put her hand up his shirt and on his heart and fell asleep.
Tessa woke to him rubbing her back and a flutter in her belly, she laughed.
���They���re moving,��� she said rolling over and taking his hand and placing it on her stomach.
���Do you feel that Collin? Our babies are moving,��� she laughed.
He rolled over to his side and smiled.
���I do, they like you happy and rested. And so do I,��� he said with a hint of relief in his voice.
He pulled up her shirt and kissed her belly.
���Hello babies, this is your daddy I hope everything is going well in there.���
���Maybe you should check it out,��� she smiled.
���Tessa, if they are moving, don���t you think they will feel, well us moving?��� he said nervously.
���If you seriously think they will remember your nuts,��� she laughed. ���If you think I���m going to wait six months for that you���re crazy.���
���It kind of freaks me out,��� he laughed.
���Fine go buy me toys then.��� She said and rolled over and smirked.
���Are you serious?���
���Maybe.���
���In the past few days you have mentioned your beautiful ass and now toys, am I missing something here? Is that something you want?��� he said, ���Or are you trying to drive me over the edge?���
���I���m definitely trying to drive you over the edge,��� she sat up and looked at him smiling and then laughed, ���I have to look at you every day��� the least you could do is put out.���
���Beg,��� he smiled.
���Nope,��� she said stubbornly.
���You will be,��� he stood up and undressed. ���I���m going to shower.���
���Fine have fun in there,��� she said.���Would you do me a favor first?���
���Sure,��� he looked at her.
���These need to be washed for some reason they are a bit damp,��� she said taking off her clothes and threw her underwear at him.
���Really?��� he asked and tried not to look at her as his jaw tightened.
���Yes but I can do it, sorry I shouldn���t have asked,��� she bent down in front of him and grabbed her clothes.
���Get in bed Tessa,��� he said in a very husky voice
���What Collin?��� she laughed.
She grabbed the clothes and his and any other piece that would give her an excuse to bend down and grab and walked to the laundry and threw the clothes in the washer.
���Hey, do you want a drink?��� She yelled as she passed the bedroom.
���No, could you get in here?���
���No, I���m hungry. Take your shower.���
He looked out the door as she streaked down the stairs.
He walked down after her, she bent over in the refrigerator and grabbed some items and then she grabbed ice cream out of the freezer.
���Hey, would you like a sundae,��� she asked, he slowly shook his head no.
She scooped ice cream and put in a bowl and took the whipped cream with her, ���Let’s watch TV we never do that.��� She sat on the couch and grabbed a blanket and patted the spot next to her. He sat, and she handed him a spoon, ���Eat with me?���
She grabbed the whipped cream and put some on the ice cream and smeared some on his nose and kissed it off. He took the whipped cream and squirted it on her breasts and sucked it off. She smiled and took it from him and squirted it on his very hard erection and went down. He set the ice cream on the floor and pulled away from her.
���Oh no, as good as that feels I owe you,��� he laid her on her back and they made love. He more than made up for the past two days that he had not touched her.
���So what do you want to do tomorrow night?��� she asked
���More of that,��� he smiled. ���But we can go out to dinner with your family if you want.���
���Okay, but then back here ��� just us?���
��
�Sounds perfect,��� he kissed her.
Collin and Tessa walked into the lakeside restaurant just outside of town. They ate their appetizers and talked about the upcoming year and how things had changed. There was a string quartet playing and some people were dancing, Tessa was amused by this, and he made her dance. She laughed when he���d pointed out there were no words and she started making up her own.
���Unless you want to skip dinner, you better stop that now,��� he laughed.
Tessa���s brothers and sisters came out to join them. Collin went and sat down next to John and Maggie, who watched their kids acting foolishly and they all laughed. They were doing the monkey, and the electric slide, the Macarena, and the swim, not one move matched the music, and they didn���t care.
Dinner came, and they all went and sat down. The place was filling up: it was ten o���clock.
The hostess brought a couple to sit at the table next to them. Collin and Tessa were busy laughing and talking. They were lost in each other.
���Hello, Ross family,��� Lucas smiled.
They all said hello.
���Happy birthday, Lucas,��� Tessa said.
���Thanks, Tessa. I want you guys to meet Ashley.���
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Lucas looked at Tessa and held up four fingers, and she laughed.
���Nice to meet you Ashley, I���ve heard a lot about you,��� Tessa stood and shook her hand.
���I feel like I already know you, the Links family seem to think they have you to thank for Lucas becoming who he is,��� Ashley smiled.
���I don���t think so, he���s a good guy. And I���m not just saying that because we didn���t send him a card,��� Tessa laughed and squeezed Collins, hand.