Shaking my head, tears filled my eyes as I pulled away from him, turning and running away. I didn’t care where I ended up as long as he wasn’t near me. Finally slowing and relaxing a little because he wasn’t anywhere near me, I sat underneath a tree stump. The ground was damp from the rain, a little muddy, but it was mostly sheltered and it was all I needed at that moment.
I finally let my guard fall and allowed myself to feel all the emotions I had been bottling up. I sobbed until I felt like there was nothing more inside me. I didn’t care how much of a mess I looked as snot and tears streamed down my face. I wish I could have said I was an attractive crier, but my eyes went all red and puffy. My face reddened and my throat hurt. Sitting there staring out at the trees, watching them swaying in the breeze, a light rain began to fall. I ignored it, enjoying the peace and tranquillity of this part of the woods.
Nathan appeared and looked down at me, pulling me out into his arms, but I backed off again and watched him breaking down, “I-I am s-s-s-ssorry about all this. I really do want to… to explain,” he said between sobs, but he then properly broke down crying and I just sat there looking at him, not saying a word. “I-I love… I love you… I know it’s a poor excuse for everything I have put you through, but it’s all I have…” My heart thundered and I didn’t know what to believe. His pain looked real, but I didn’t trust him enough to even try to forgive him. “Jas, please, try to understand my family…” He broke off again drawing in a deep breath and shuddering as he glanced at me through his tears and seeing the cold expression on my face.
He shook his head, looked at his watch, and turned back to me. “We have to get going. Come on!”
Processing his words, I let him pull me up, but when he reached out to touch my face, I slapped his hand away. He looked at me with tears in his eyes. “Oh God, I’ve really fucked up this time, haven’t I? Just tell me what I can do. I will do anything…” He dropped to his knees, his brown wavy hair falling down as his head dropped. “I’m begging you. Please, Jas. Please forgive me. I love you, more than my own life, but I had to act like that. Please just, just say you’ll give me, us another chance…”
I shook my head, watching as tears fell from him eyes, feeling tears streaming down my face as I looked at him. I couldn’t forgive him. I didn’t know how to.
He stood, dusted himself down, and leaned into me, kissing my hair, forehead, and nose. “I will make it up to you. I promise, somehow I will make you forgive me.” He kissed my head one last time and looked at me in the eyes, the kind of look that scorched my soul. I began to waver until he hissed, “Quick, hide…”
He shoved me back into the roots of the trees and pushed the roots down, hiding me from view as Lisa walked into the clearing, “Where have you been, baby?” she asked in a voice sounding ridiculously babyish.
“Just walking and thinking,” he answered, with an edge to his voice.
“Are we still on for tonight?” Her high voice, sounded babyish as she spoke to him and she leaned over to him, giving him a quick kiss as I sat under the root watching their display.
“Yes, of course,” he answered her, sounding nervous.
“Are we still going to, you know?” she asked nervously. I could see her through a gap in the roots and she was twirling her long blond hair around her finger and licking her lips. Stuffing my fist in my mouth, I bit down so I wouldn’t make a sound.
Nathan shuffled his feet and cleared his throat. “I dunno; we’ll need to see if we can get away without being noticed…”
“Are you seriously doing this to me again, Nathan Stevenson? When we got back together on Saturday, you said you were serious, and that to prove it, I would be your first. Clearly, you don’t want me. It is so over. Don’t bother calling me or trying to get back with me again. We are fucking done and that little whore Jasmine is welcome to you and your fucked up ideas on relationships.”
With that, she turned on her heel and walked away. Nathan called out after her, “Wait, Lisa. I didn’t…”
“No, I’m done waiting on you.”
She didn’t even turn back as she answered. After a few minutes, when he was sure she was gone, Nathan pulled the tree stump up and looked at me apprehensively. I didn’t say a word to him, nor him to me, all the way back to his house.
As we reached the driveway, I skirted around the trees and was in my barn, changed into my fleecy jogging bottoms and my warmest jumper when Jenny flew into the barn as I brushed my hair, shouting at me, “Have you got something to do with my brother and Lisa breaking up?”
Looking up at her, I made my face look perplexed as Nathan came running into the barn. “Oh, for God’s sake, Jen, I told you no. She just went skitso at me and began shouting at me about her. There is nothing going on with us, is there?” he sounded pleading and for the first time all week, I spoke in front of him.
“Definitely not. Your brother is not my type at all!”
I couldn’t look at Nathan, but when I did, he looked sadder and more defeated than ever. Then, as I surreptitiously glanced at him, he shook his head and half-smiled at me. Jenny turned around, missing the look by a moment, and they marched out of the barn together.
Nathan came back a little later, speaking quickly over my shoulder before he walked away. “You have been ordered to come out to the fireworks show…”
Walking out of that barn was difficult, but not as difficult as facing those I now knew were demons, like my social worker. I had seen her in the woods on Halloween, but it took me a few days to look at the faces in depth and strip away the demon on them. Seeing teachers from my current school, two of my previous doctors, teachers from primary school, social workers, and some of the women who took care of my while I was in the home.
All of them were at the bonfire, celebrating, but I just stood in the background, glad that I had figured out my way out and that no one, not Nathan or his family, were going to make me stay a moment longer than necessary.
The night went off without a hitch; everyone had fun with the sparklers and enjoying the festivities. I stood back plotting my escape, not paying attention to what was going on around me, until a few pairs of hands grabbed me and lifted me in the air.
I screamed at the top of my lungs and saw Nathan looking up in shock, surrounded by his father, mother, and sister.
“Shall we throw the mortal into the fire?” one voice called out as I squirmed and wriggled.
All the onlookers laughed and joked around, “Sure, go on then!” said another voice, sounding maliciously amused.
I was carried closer to the fire, screaming and wriggling, but not one person helped me. Nathan stood transfixed in horror as I gasped as the heat from the fire tickled my feet. Feeling my feet blistering, I cried and tried to work out how to use my powers again, as Nathan’s dad stepped forwards.
“ENOUGH!” he bellowed and they moved me back from the fire slightly. “I have already given an edict about touching my mortal. Do you want me to remind you, Nicholas, who is in charge here?”
“No, sir,” Nicholas answered. I gasped in pain. The agonizing burning was right up to my calves.
“Nathan, Jenny, take the mortal into the house and treat her burns. The rest of you go home. Tonight is over!”
Gasping in pain as Jenny raked her nails up my legs, Nathan looked down at me, hissing, “Jenny, cut it out. Dad’s angry enough.”
I could feel tears stinging my eyes as they carried me into the house, but I refused to cry, not making a sound as Nathan attempted to get me into a chair. However, when they tried to take off my shoes, I screamed in agony. My feet were on fire. Nate brought over a large bucket almost full of water. The water was freezing cold and I screamed and writhed as they placed my feet and legs into the bucket, submerging them.
After ten minutes, of water changes, ice and shivering, I felt lightheaded and dizzy, retching. Nathan was the first to notice and jumped out of the way as I vomited. Unfortunately, Jenny was not as lucky and I was sick all over her.
>
“Oh my God, were you actually just sick on me?” she asked with malice in her voice. I couldn’t answer her. She drew her fist back and punched me full in the face, knocking me from the stool I had been sitting on. The ice water went all over me and mixed with the vomit on the floor. My head was swimming with what felt like a million different aches and pains. I closed my eyes and rested my head on my arms.
“Jenny, what do you think you are doing?” Nathan’s father demanded from what sounded like the kitchen door, making me jump in surprise.
“She was sick on me, Dad. I have mortal puke all over me. Ugh, I’m going for a shower!”
Nathan stood back watching me as his father walked closer, looking at my legs and feet. As soon as he touched them, my eyes rolled backwards into my head and I flitted in and out of consciousness.
“She has gone into shock,” Mr Stevenson’s voice said as I regained consciousness for a moment.
“Dress the wound in this, Nathan,” Mr Stevenson commanded, followed this time by a foul smell, like seaweed, burning rubber and dirt, all mixed in together with a few other scents that I couldn’t identify.
“Help her over to the barn. Nick, help your brother and since you did this, you can take the watch tonight with Nathan. Her dressings will need to be changed in a few hours.”
As I was carried, I could feel a hand rubbing my back in circles, but that was all I was aware off, until I came to a short while later, lying in the barn on top of my sleeping bags, feeling as though my skin was being eaten by fire-breathing dragons. The fire burned right up and down my legs, and I made a small noise as I tried to move.
Nathan appeared at my side but when I went to open my mouth to speak, he shook his head and pointed in the direction of the barn door. Outside, I could just make out a conversation Nick was having, “No baby, I’m sorry. I have to stay and mortal sit… I know it’s awful, but there is nothing I can do… the old man is making me stay... Yeah, me too… but I best get back. I’ve left Nathan alone and if she wakes, one of us needs to hold her down while the other rewraps her legs… Okay… see you tomorrow, bye.”
The barn door opened and I looked around for Nathan, but saw him leaning against the fence post, playing with his phone. As his brother approached, Nate nodded in my direction, “I think it’s walking up, shall we?”
“Sure thing, little bro. What do you want to do? Wrap the burns…” he said with an evil glint in his eye that I could see from where I lay, “or hold the stupid thing down while I wrap?”
“I’ll do the wrapping. I think you’re too much of a sadist and my work would be much harder if I hold her.”
“Haha, you are correct, little bro. Now let’s get this done so we can get to bed. I’m fucked up and I have to drive back to Birmingham tomorrow. I need some sleep.”
They walked towards me and I flinched as Nick’s hands bit into my shoulders with a tremendous force. As Nathan unwrapped the bandages, I suddenly understood why Nick held me so tightly. My whole body vibrated as I shivered, shaking like a leaf blowing around in a strong wind. When Nathan applied the salve to my burns, I sobbed. My whole body vibrated so hard as I screamed in agony.
Suddenly, Nathan stabbed me in the top of the leg, causing a soothing sensation to flow around, allowing me to relax.
“What are you doing? Dad said to use that only if we felt it couldn’t cope.”
“To be honest, I didn’t think she could cope. I decided to give her some pain relief so we can finish this quicker and get to bed.”
“You are too soft-hearted, but get on with it.”
I could feel Nathan applying pressure and adding another coat of this salve along with a cling film dressing. As soon as he was finished, Nick stood. My head felt fuzzy and I relaxed as Nick said, “Clean up, Nate. I’m off to bed mate. See you in the morning.”
“Okay, no worries. See you tomorrow,” Nate answered, watching him walk out of sight. “Are you okay, Jas?”
I shook my head. “I still hate you…”
“I know, baby, but this will heal and I will fix us. I can’t tell you how sorry I am.” He stroked my arm, gathered up the supplies, and turned around to leave. “Relax, Jas. You can go to sleep now, baby. I’ll be back to watch over you shortly.”
With that, I slept soundly for a solid nine hours. I awoke the next day to my legs feeling rough, blistered, and stiff, but not as sore as they should have been, the only relief I would get for a while.
I didn’t see or speak to Nathan for over a month, and the longer he left me, the angrier I got. How could he do this to us? How could he say he loved me and then mess around with her? I couldn’t think straight about him, so I blocked everything out, ignoring him completely. It was a long, lonely month and I felt more alone than ever.
The next time I saw Nathan properly was on the fourth of December at a family dinner. I helped serve, but he didn’t speak to me at all. I occasionally caught his eyes lingering on me and, glancing at his expression, he looked frustrated and sad.
I tried to speak to Nathan in the kitchen between courses, but as usual, Lisa appeared. She had been following him around for the past month. He ignored me and walked over to stand with her, giving me a pointed look that shattered my already broken heart into a million little pieces.
His eyes hardened as he looked at me. He turned away and followed Lisa. His posture was the only thing that showed that he wasn’t happy, but I couldn’t watch him any longer. I turned back to the task at hand. I loaded the dishwasher and as I closed it, I heard the whisper in my mind, “I’m sorry.”
On the fifth of December, I walked behind Nate and Jenny, not thinking about much, but reliving all our moments when I realised that he hadn’t properly spoken to me in over a month and I missed him. No matter what he did around that awful time, I loved him, and I couldn’t turn it off. As I thought about this, I noticed his head shift slightly in my direction, but he still said nothing.
Perhaps he didn’t want to speak to me or perhaps he wasn’t ready. As we walked, I heard footsteps coming up behind me and a girl with long, blond hair shoved me out of the way.
“Are you ready, Nathan? We have to hurry if we are going to make dinner.” Lisa asked him, turning my stomach.
“Yeah, Lisa. Just need to drop my bag off, then I’m all yours,” he answered her, emphasising those words. Shaking my head in dismay, continuing to walk was difficult as I tried to think of a way out. I am so done with this shit.
I didn’t think about anything else and, as I walked away into the freezing barn, I turned back and glanced at them. Nate held her hand, but looked behind her at me. As I glanced at him, I saw a tear escape his eye and he quickly brushed it away. Turning back into the barn, I set up my school bag for the next day. Running away was the only option I had; I decided to visit my friends in Glasgow.
Planning everything took all night, but I managed it. As I fell asleep, I was comforted by the fact that this was my last night in the barn and I would never again have to see Nate and Lisa, or his family, ever again.
During the night, I felt a rustle beside me, but I refused to open my eyes. Eventually, I could only hear my breathing and I fell back to sleep. Nathan awakened me in the morning with my breakfast of cereal and toast, with a cup of tea. He never said a word to me — just turned and walked away.
A little over an hour later, I got on the 500 bus, which would take me towards Dumfries. Then I would change over to the x74 in Dumfries after half an hour. I couldn’t wait to get away from them, but especially Nathan.
Sitting on the bus, I felt a huge sigh of relief building as the bus pulled away from Carlingwark Street and moved along the countryside. I closed my eyes and focused on the future — getting a job, finding a flat of my own, and getting over Nathan fully.
As we reached Dumfries, I got off the bus smiling, and walked straight into Nathan and Joe. Almost crying in frustration, I turned to run away as Nathan grabbed my arm. “Jas, listen please. I know I don’t deserve you, and that you
hate me right now, but you need to come back. If they find out you’ve left, they’ll kill you. I have never stopped loving you, but after the look on your face last month, I don’t know how to fix us…”
Turning back towards him, I opened my mouth to say something about how it was too late to apologise and fix us, when I felt a sharp prick pierce my arm and I fell into blackness. The last thing I saw was Nathan standing over me, looking down at me shaking his head, mouthing, “I’m so sorry…” He said something else, but his face went fuzzy and the next thing I knew, I awoke in the barn, shivering, sneezing, and coughing.
Crawling under the sleeping bags, I allowed myself to grieve for the life I planned away from them, but things had changed with Nathan. I didn’t trust him at all anymore; the slight trust he had built was gone as he betrayed me and then took me back to hell.
The next few weeks passed slowly with Nathan and Lisa breaking up again. This time was for good, though I didn’t know it at the time. Nathan also visited the barn every night, between one and three a.m., but I refused to awaken and speak to him.
Eventually, after five nights of him sitting there, I gave in. “What do you want, Nathan?”
“Just to talk, Jas. I miss you.”
“Missing me doesn’t fix us. It doesn’t mean anything to me, not anymore. You’ve said it too many times now.”
I turned away from him and tried to go back to sleep. I hadn’t opened my eyes at all, I heard him sigh, lean over, and kiss my head. “I have been here every single night watching over you, willing you to talk to me, but this cold indifference you have is breaking my heart. I love you so much and I am trying to protect you but I know you deserve better than anything I can give you.”
He breathed the words against my forehead and sat back, taking my hand in his, ignoring my flinch as he touched me. His voice was hoarse as he continued,
Ignition (Escaping Demons Saga Book 2) Page 10