The Moon and the Stars

by Constance O'Banyon

  “I am finished,” she said, placing her napkin beside her plate.

  He rose to his feet. “Then Louis can drive us to the docks. It is not long until the riverboat leaves port.”

  She was almost relieved when they left the dining room. Shouldn’t a wedding day be happy? He had reverted to the brooding stranger that she had been afraid of when they had first met. She had not understood him then, and she now understood him even less.

  What was he keeping from her? She did not know.

  When they boarded the Cotton Maid, there was a festive mood onboard. Music was filtering out of the lounge, fireworks lit up the sky, and streamers were flying through the air.

  Wade escorted Caroline through the crowd to their suite and then allowed her to precede him inside. The whole cabin was decorated in white and gold. The bed cover and curtains were white fringed in gold.

  The sheer gaudiness suddenly struck Caroline as funny. Wade, with his strong male persona, could never feel comfortable in such surroundings.

  He shrugged and shook his head. “I should have inspected the cabin myself. I asked Louis to book the bridal suite.”

  She was still trying not to laugh. “I’m sorry, it’s very lovely, but how will you abide all this fringe?”

  “This will not do,” he said, taking her arm to keep her from going any further inside. “I will have the purser change rooms immediately.”

  She slid her hand up his arm. “You will do nothing of the sort. How else will we ever know how it feels to live in a sultan’s palace?”

  “I know your tastes are more refined than this.”

  “But what does it matter?”

  He smiled down at her. “Are you sure you do not mind?”

  “Not at all. It will give us something to tell our grandchildren.”

  He watched her approach the bed, where she batted at one of the many velvet balls that dangled from the bed hanging. She covered her mouth to keep from laughing. “Poor Louis. You are not to say a word to him about this—do I have your word on that?”

  “Oui.” Most women would have insisted on being moved to another room, but Caroline was more concerned about Louis’s feelings than the ridiculous decor. Wade liked that about her.

  “Happy wedding day, Madame Renault.”

  She gazed back at him, wishing she could interpret the many secrets that were hidden behind those golden eyes. “I hope it will be.” She hadn’t meant to say that, it just slipped out.

  He averted his gaze. “You will find everything you need in the brown trunk.” He moved away and paused in the doorway. “I believe it is customary for the groom to give the bride time alone. I will return shortly.”

  She watched him leave and then turned to the trunk. With Mary’s efficiency, she knew everything would be appropriate. She stepped out of her gray gown and draped it across a chair.

  Opening the trunk, she found a delicate white muslin nightgown with blue satin ties at the neck. After undressing, she pulled the nightgown over her head and slipped into the blue dressing gown, belting it at her waist. Her hands were trembling when she sat before the vanity and unbound her hair, brushing the golden curls until they crackled.

  Not knowing what to do next, she sat on the bed, leaning against the white velvet headboard, and folded her hands in her lap.

  Waiting.

  The Cotton Maid swayed gently on the calm river, and she could hear the distant sound of the paddle wheel splashing against the water. She was momentarily lulled into a sense of serenity. But when Wade entered a short time later, he jolted her calmness.

  His eyes sought hers as he bent to blow out the lantern. As her vision adjusted to the faint moonlight that streamed into the compartment, she could still see the vividness in his golden eyes.

  She watched his hand go to his belt, and she waited as he bent to remove his boots.

  Her heart was pounding, then drumming against her breasts as he removed his shirt, allowing it to slide to the floor. She did not look away when he slid his trousers down. Her eyes widened when she saw his arousal, and he came toward her.

  Gently he swept her long hair off her shoulders and bent over her, brushing a kiss across her forehead. She was breathing fast when he laid his face against hers.

  “I have waited a long time for tonight,” he said, lifting her to her feet and untying her sash, kissing her while her dressing gown dropped in a clump at her feet. She was hardly aware that he had pushed her nightgown off her shoulders until a cool breeze from the open window touched her skin.

  He stepped back, his gaze moving slowly over her naked body. His voice was thick when he said, “You are a rare beauty, Caroline.”

  Her eyes closed because she felt so much she could not speak. When he gently touched her breasts, she felt a hunger she could not explain.

  “You are mine now,” he said, touching his lips to hers. “All mine.” He moved forward, his hard body touching hers. “Mon amour, come willingly to me.”

  And she did.

  She flung her arms around his neck, and he lifted her onto the bed. When he came down beside her, she thought she would die from wanting him.

  There was nowhere on her body that Wade did not kiss, caress, and explore. She was mindless and ready to submit to his every desire. He used the allurement of seductive words to draw her to him, sometimes speaking in French, sometimes in English. She was sure that his prowess was so strong that no woman could resist him.

  Certainly not she.

  His hungry mouth devoured her, and she was almost in a frenzy. She threw off her inhibitions and ground her lower body against his, and she heard him hiss through his teeth.

  A cry of longing escaped her throat when he dipped his head to kiss her breasts. His tongue slid around one nipple, then his mouth covered it while she squirmed beneath him. She had not imagined anything more exquisite than what he was doing to her—or anything so painful as wanting him to do more.

  His desire was unleashed at last, and it tore through him. He explored every inch of the soft body that had kept him awake many nights. His hand moved over her hips, pulling her closer to him, forming her to his shape.

  He moved his hand down and touched her intimately. He drew in a quick breath when she arched against his hand, inviting him to do more.

  He could not wait! There was no time to woo her into accepting him. If he did not have her now, he would explode. He covered her body with his and eased inside her, gritting his teeth at the intense pleasure that shattered through him. She had been untouched, and her tightness stopped him. He did not want to hurt her, so he pulled back. Slowly, his finger slid into her, and she cried out.

  “I know what you are feeling, my love. I know this is new to you. Trust me?”

  “Yes.”

  She bit her lip but still groaned when he touched a certain spot on her, and she almost came off the bed.

  He touched his lips to her ear. “Je t’attends depuis longtemps. I have waited a long time for you.”

  He nudged her legs wider apart, and his eyes drifted shut when he experienced emotions so acute that they were like pain. He wanted to remember the moment her body was finally joined with his.

  She opened to him, her arms going around his neck, touching her lips to his throat.

  He quaked and trembled, and he sought her mouth, partaking of her sweetness. He tried to control his movements, to still his heartbeat, but he was on fire.

  Caroline’s emptiness filled with his warmth as he slowly pushed forward inside her. When he probed deeper, she sighed with even more pleasure.

  “Forgive me,” he said as he drove into her, unable to contain his torrid passion. With a quick jab he tore through the barrier that had proclaimed her a virgin. When he heard her sharp breath and felt her stiffen, he stopped and held her tightly.

  “The pain will not last long.”

  She could not utter a word as he eased farther into her. Her eyes widened in wonder when he slowly rocked back and forth.

 
In a haze of passion, she watched him bare his teeth, and she stared into those wonderful golden eyes that were like flames of fire. She had the feeling he was drawing her inside him, and the sensation was beyond anything she had ever imagined.

  He seemed to know instinctively what would please her, and he masterfully conquered her.

  When she arched against him, drawing him deeper, Wade whispered roughly, “Mon amour, do not.”

  His lovemaking opened the door to so many new emotions. One new feeling had hardly struck before another took its place to leave her gasping for breath.

  The two of them trembled together as they reached satisfaction at last. They clung to each other while their spirits seemed to soar free.

  Then Wade sank against Caroline, and she joyfully bore the full weight of his body.

  Long moments passed as his fingers interlocked with hers, and he raised her hand to his lips. She slid her hand from his and pushed his hair back, kissing his mouth.

  She sighed—he took a deep breath.

  Reluctantly he moved off her and turned her to face him, pushing a sweat-dampened curl from her face. He traced her arched brow with a finger and drew it down to her swollen lips.

  “I was sure it would be powerful between us, and it was,” he admitted, pulling her head against his shoulder. “I do not think my mind has ever been this clear before.”

  She ran her fingers up his arm. “I want to be a good wife to you.” She lowered her lashes coyly. “I certainly want to try.”

  His laughter was deep and sexual. “Caroline—” he touched his mouth to hers. “You have just given me your purity and sweetness, and I would definitely call that gift being a good wife.” He took her face in his hands and made her look at him. “I believe I knew we were meant to be together before I met you.”

  She pulled back and raised herself up on her elbow. “You said that before. What can you mean?”

  He hated to bring anything ugly into such a perfect moment, but he had to tell her about her father, and he had to go slowly. “Brace Duncan had sent me a picture so I would recognize you when I saw you.”

  She disliked the thought of Brace having a picture of her. He must have taken the one that she had given Michael. “I did not know he had my likeness.”

  “I want you to understand what I have to say to you. I want you to know how I feel about you so there will be no doubt later on.” He forced her to look at him. “Caroline, I would never have taken the assignment to go after you if I had not first seen your likeness. I cannot explain it, but I felt compelled to find you wherever you were.”

  “And you did.”

  He drew her back into his arms, holding her tightly. “There is so much we have to say to each other. We do not know each other all that well, although my heart spoke to yours long before you answered.”

  His words were enticing, the meaning just out of her reach—he was as much a master with words as he had been with a gun. “You are keeping something from me.”

  “I admit that I have been. I want you to realize that I could not tell you this before now because you were so ill. The doctor warned me that I must not upset you.”

  She suddenly went cold inside, and she wasn’t sure she wanted to hear what he had to say. The passion that had flared between them was just below the surface, and it would take only a touch of his hand to bring it back into flames. “I don’t understand.”

  Wade wanted to make love to her again so he could avoid telling her about her father. He was about to make the hardest confession he had ever faced in his life, and he dreaded the outcome. Would she hate him for keeping the news from her for so long?

  “Even before I start,” he said, moving his mouth over hers, “I will remind you that I once told you that I would soon ask something of you. I ask it tonight. I ask it now.”

  “What can it be?”

  “I ask for your forgiveness.”

  She felt her world crumbling and falling down around her. Something was dreadfully wrong, and he was about to tell her what it was.

  Chapter Twenty-five

  She rolled away from him and propped herself against the headboard, tossing her hair behind her. “Are you about to tell me that you are handing me over to Brace?”

  “Never. How could you think that?” He moved toward her so he was sitting beside her, but not touching her. In the soft moonlight he was familiarizing himself with the face that had haunted him even before he met her.

  “First, Caroline, will you answer some questions for me? Even if you think they are ill-timed for a wedding night?”

  Her hand fell onto his leg, and she jerked it away. His eyes begged her for something she did not understand. She felt defenseless in her nakedness.

  And she needed to be in control. Whatever he was about to tell her was going to be very bad. She slid out of bed and pulled on her robe and moved away from him. “If I can answer your questions, I will.”

  He stood up and slipped into his trousers, then moved closer to her. “Tell me about your mother and father.”

  To Caroline the moment took on a feeling of unreality. Why was he asking these questions tonight?

  “My recollections of my mother are really just impressions. When I think of her, I remember that she loved me. I think of her as a very gentle and kind person. And she always smelled of roses.”

  “And your father?”

  Perhaps he was asking the questions because he wanted to know what her life had been like as a child. She remembered the questions he had thrown at her that day in the swamp—maybe this was more of the same.

  “My father is a planter, although he lost everything in the war and the fields around my home are now dormant. You have been to the platation and spoken to my father; you must have noticed the ruin and how run-down the house was.”

  “A lot of the South has not yet recovered from the war. I thought your home was better preserved than most.”

  She tightened her belt. Her body still tingled from his lovemaking, and it would only take a touch of his hand to bring her back into his arms. Why was he so distant now?

  “I suppose so.”

  “You said your father objected to your marriage to Michael?”

  “Yes, he did. Fervently.” She lowered her head, but just for a moment, and then she met his gaze. “My father told me that he would never see me again if I married into the Duncan family.”

  “What did he have against them?”

  He was grilling her hard, and she felt exposed by his questions. But he seemed insistent, so she answered his questions.

  “The Duncan family did not have a good reputation—not good enough for my father. Michael’s father did not put all his assets into Confederate funds like my father thought a true patriot should have done when the war came along. Instead, Mr. Duncan bought Yankee gold. I believe our neighbors who lost everything in the war resented Mr. Duncan for it. But he did not live long enough to rue the day.”

  “In retrospect, it sounds like he made a good business choice.”

  “That was what Michael always said. But my father’s main objection to the family went deeper than that. He despised and mistrusted Brace, who had a reputation for bullying anyone who didn’t think the way he did. It was suspected by some, although never proven, that Brace had set fire to the Jamiesons’ house because of an argument he had with Mr. Jamieson over a horse.” She clasped her hands tightly together. “The Jamiesons’ five-year-old daughter died in that fire.”

  Wade noticed that her whole body was trembling, and he cursed himself for being an insensitive fool. But in a few moments he would have to say even more cruel words, words that would tear her heart out. He wished there were another way, but there was not. The thought of hurting her made him feel sick inside.

  She watched the emotions play across his face, and she felt a deep sadness in him.

  “Wade?”

  At first she resisted when he reached out to gather her in his arms, but then she laid her head against his che
st.

  “Caroline, I wish there were some way I could spare you this, but I cannot.”

  She didn’t want to know what he had to tell her. She spoke in a rush, trying to ignore what was to come. “My father did not go to the wedding, and our last meeting was a very painful one.”

  “Do not say any more. There is no need.”

  She felt like crying, but she held back her tears. “I know my father is sorry now. I know he would want to see me. It is painful for me to remember that his last words to me were spoken in anger.” She felt a tightening in her chest as a premonition hit her. “I will want to see him as soon as possible.” She clutched at Wade’s arm, already knowing what he was about to tell her. “Say that I can see my father very soon.”

  He took her hands and captured them in his. He could not stand to look into her eyes as he began to speak. “And if it is not possible to see him, then what?”

  She shook her head as dread settled over her. She turned an uncertain gaze up to him. She freed her hand from his clasp and moved across the cabin to stand at the window. “What are you trying to tell me?”

  He went to her and eased her toward him. It seemed that she could not hold herself upright, and her head fell against his chest.

  “Tell me what is wrong with my father.”

  “Caroline, I wish there were some way I could spare you this. You have been through so much.”

  She burrowed her face against his skin and allowed his arms to go around her. “What happened?”

  “I received a telegram from Nate. He said your father had been shot.”

  He waited for her to react, but she said nothing. He had expected her to cry and carry on, but no sound came from her lips. Then he felt the violent trembling that shook her slight body.

  “No! It cannot be. My father is not dead. If he were, I would have felt it in my heart.”

  He caught her hands. “Caroline, it is true. Do you think I would fabricate something like this?”

  She stumbled away from him and threw herself down on the bed, burrowing her face into the pillow and sobbing so hard her whole body shook with the intensity of it.