Consequence of Jealousy: A Pride and Prejudice Variation
Page 22
“Mary!” Jane exclaimed in response, and to Elizabeth’s relief, the rest of the journey was spent teasing Jane. Even Georgiana joined in the fun, although Elizabeth detected a slight sadness in her air. The closer they were to Longbourn, the more fidgety and nervous Georgiana became.
Elizabeth resolved that she would watch her closely.
***
As the carriage rounded the drive up to Longbourn, Elizabeth could not help the burst of happiness she felt. She could already make out the still figures of both her parents and younger sisters awaiting them in front of the estate. She had missed them, missed her mama’s very public and invasive inquiries, her papa’s sarcastic observations, and even Lydia and Kitty’s squabbling.
She was home.
“Are you ready?” she asked Georgiana, as the carriage rolled to stop.
To her credit, Georgiana gave a very firm nod, as she arose first to exit the carriage. Elizabeth watched her go, glad that she at least would have Netherfield and her brother to escape to, if she felt overwhelmed.
“Lizzie! Jane! Come Mary!” her mama called, as they exited the carriage, swiftly behind Georgiana. “She drew them all into a hug, never pausing to draw a breath. Lydia and Kitty begrudgingly offered the three of them each a hug, clearly still smarting over the decision for them to be left behind at Longbourn, and unable to participate in society, a per their papa’s edict. The last to draw them in was their papa. He hugged Elizabeth last.
“Lizzie, my dear,” he stated quietly, although his tone was mischievous, as he drew her into his arms, “how I have suffered without your presence! These past few weeks have seemed like months, as I have not heard two words of sense spoken together! How are you, my dear?” he asked, his eyes darting from her to a quiet Mr. Darcy, who stood somewhat awkwardly next to his sister.
Elizabeth hugged him again. “I am well, Papa. Much better than I expected.” It was the truth, oddly enough.
That seemed to satisfy her father. He released her, and then walked over to Mr. Darcy and shook his hand briskly.
“Now, we should all go inside for the luncheon that Mrs. Bennet has ordered,” he announced, his eyes twinkling as he glanced back at his wife, “for this special occasion.”
While her papa had been speaking, Mary had been introducing Georgiana to her mama, who had almost gaped in astonishment that this motherless child was going to become her second born’s sister, once she married the elusive Mr. Darcy! Elizabeth watched as her mama had only just refrained from hugging her into her bosom, but instead took her by the hand, and led her inside, with Lydia and Kitty chatting away on either side of her.
And Mr. Darcy allowed it.
Swallowing briefly, Elizabeth forced herself to approach Mr. Darcy, who simply stood rooted in the same spot, watching the others pass by him, and go directly into Longbourn.
“Are you waiting for someone, Mr. Darcy?”
Her question seemed to startle him, and she wondered if he had even noticed that she had not passed by him.
Mr. Darcy shrugged his shoulders. “Charles and his party should be here in a few minutes, although I am surprised that they are not here already. He wrote to me yesterday evening, stating that Mrs. Bennet had invited him to luncheon upon our return, several days ago.”
Elizabeth could only speculate. “Perhaps they have been unavoidably delayed. It would not be the first time.”
Mr. Darcy agreed with her.
Elizabeth felt awkward. Yet she did not.
She cleared her throat, hoping that her voice did not reflect the turmoil that she felt within.
“Would you like me to wait for them with you?” she queried.
Mr. Darcy gave her an indiscernible look, yet she felt some part of him relax around her. He gave a short nod, and so they waited.
He would allow himself no hope at the gesture; she was simple doing as she must.
***
Luncheon was cold ham and turkey, with sliced cucumber, cheese, and tomato. Cook had made little tea cakes, and served it with wild strawberry and raspberry jam. After such a long journey, with only breakfast to sustain them, every member of the traveling group ate with great gusto.
Elizabeth surveyed the party with great satisfaction. Most everyone seemed pleased.
There was her papa, seated at the head of the table, hardly paying attention to what he was consuming. Instead, he was more interested in observing those around him, giving soft chuckles and secretive smiles to what he observed. Elizabeth supposed that the only means by which the party could improve for her papa, would be if Mr. Collins had been invited.
Her mama was much the same, surveying her clutch of chicks as a proud mother hen. She watched as Kitty and Lydia each spoke over Georgiana, interfering when she believed the talk had grown too coarse for such a delicate set of ears. Thank goodness her papa had impressed upon her mama, the importance of regulating Lydia and Kitty’s speech, especially when it came to the officers. Elizabeth let out a small laugh, as she watched her mama attempt to regulate Georgiana’s plate from across the table, as the poor girl had barely filled it.
Mr. Bingley and Jane had been seated directly across from each other, no doubt directed in that manner by their mama. Now they truly behaved as a married or engaged couple ought to, Elizabeth thought wistfully, as she watched their interaction. Jane spoke in low, pleasing tones, and Mr. Bingley strained over the table to hear her, as it had grown rather loud with Lydia and Kitty speaking enough for everybody. At least their conversation was private, although, given the way that Mr. Bingley flushed, she could think of a few topics they were discussing.
On one end of the table, closest to her mama, sat Mr. and Mrs. Hurst. They were not speaking to each other, but that was not odd. While at Netherfield, she had only ever heard Mr. Hurst speak when he wished someone to pass a dish, or to question his brother in law as to whether or not they would go shooting that particular day. What was odd, however, was the way that they kept sneaking glances at each other, when they thought the other wasn’t looking. It was not in the usual manner, in a newly engaged, fresh faced couple would sneak loving glances at each other. No, this was something else entirely. More speculative.
It took Elizabeth a few more minutes to understand it, but then it came to her. They were both seeking out the truth within each other, when the person was at their most unguarded states.
Elizabeth hoped they found it.
On the other end of the table, sat Mary and the Viscount of Abbington, Lord Edward. Perhaps, unluckily for her papa, as neither of them provided him with much amusement. Had either of them been addressed, perhaps a conversation may have been started, but instead the both of them were content to sit, eat, and observe--the same as her papa. Elizabeth knew that if she could get away with it, Mary would slip away after luncheon. In the excitement, as mama clearly did not know to whom she should beam or cluck at first--Lydia, Kitty, and Georgiana, Jane and Mr. Bingley, or Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy themselves. She had a veritable feast laid out before her, and she had spread herself thin, trying to gorge.
Mr. Darcy.
He was seated directly across from Elizabeth, her mama’s doing she knew, with Miss Bingley flanking his left side. While Mr. Darcy’s face was carefully blank, as he surveyed his sister and Elizabeth’s sisters, Miss Bingley’s face held none of his restraint. While not technically displaying disgust, it was clear that something had happened, for Miss Bingley had forgotten herself. It was a minor mercy that she had not spoken yet.
Perhaps the din of the Bennet household had overwhelmed her, Elizabeth thought with a small smile.
“Does something amuse you?” Mr. Darcy asked. Elizabeth had not noticed that he had taken his gaze off of his sister.
What had he been thinking?
“I am simply glad to be home, Mr. Darcy.” she finally answered. “I always enjoy visiting London, but I am most happy when I am back home, in the country.”
Mr. Darcy inclined his head. “I share your feelings,” he
admitted, “I too prefer to stay at Pemberley, unless otherwise needed.” His gaze drifted back down the table, to his sister, to Elizabeth’s sisters. “I believe my sister feels the same way, but perhaps yours do not?”
His gaze met hers. Elizabeth could only smile wanly.
“My sisters are eager for any society that is away from Meryton, although I cannot deny that London holds great appeal for them. They have not been to London since before their coming out, as our families alternate Christmases. So they are very eager.”
Would that satisfy him, she wondered. Had his insinuation been said with anything other than idle curiosity, Elizabeth would have felt insulted on her sisters’ behalf. But this, she could not understand.
And more importantly, she wished to know why she wanted to understand. Why she wished to satisfy his curiosity.
He had apologised, he had confessed his love for her, and she had responded by happily making plans for when Mary would visit her. It was no use making plans for Jane, as she was sure that Jane and Mr. Bingley would follow them to the altar sooner than one might have thought. Lydia and Kitty, she knew would beg to visit sooner, rather than later, but she wished to give Mary something of her own.
It was the first time he had made more than polite inquiries about her family, although she had observed him paying close attention to Mary’s playing at Gracechurch Street on their first call.
He was curious. She hoped that she had satisfied his curiosity, yet she was aware that now was not the time nor the place to make that inquiry.
She would find out, soon enough, anyways.
Their wedding was in a week, and Elizabeth’s thoughts drifted back to Louisa Hurst’s advice. Although she had not explicitly stated it, she had intimated that she had not truly cared about the state of her marriage until it was far too late, and yet……….
Was caring an advantage, Elizabeth wondered.
Did it matter?
Did it build a foundation?
And perhaps, most importantly, did she wish it to?
Elizabeth followed Mr. Darcy’s gaze back to their sisters. A rueful smile touched her lips, and she realised the truth of the matter.
It was everything to her, and she could not accept it.
***
“Charlotte!” Elizabeth exclaimed in surprise. After her realization at the luncheon, she had declined the invitation to go walking about Longbourn with the rest of her party, and had decided to sit in the window. So she watched as her sisters and betrothed walked off, into the distance.
However, Charlotte’s visit was a surprise. They embraced, and Charlotte did her the favour of answering her unasked question.
“Mrs. Bennet has been speaking of your luncheon to my mother for the past few days, and so I had hoped to visit afterwards.”
Elizabeth frowned. “I am sure mama would not have minded if you had come, Charlotte.”
Charlotte waved her concerns away. “Although Mrs. Bennet professes to be unaffected, what with your upcoming wedding and Jane’s impending engagement, I did not wish to press the matter. I shall be gone to Hunsford soon.”
“When is your wedding?”
Charlotte gave a wan smile. “Mr. Collins had thought to marry before you, in protest of your engagement to Mr. Darcy, out of deference to Lady Catherine. Howeve,r I talked him out of it, by reminding him that we did not know the exact date. So we shall be married shortly before Christmas.”
Elizabeth grasped her friend’s hand. “Are you content, Charlotte?”
Charlotte raised a brow. “I am surprised at you Lizzie. I would not have thought you would have asked that question. But I am. I was never romantic, as you know. And are you?”
“Am I what, Charlotte?”
“Are you content?”
Elizabeth gave a short laugh, as her gaze drifted back to the window. She could not even see Mr. Darcy or any of her sisters. They were too far away.
“I am not, Charlotte.” she confessed. “But I may be.”
***
With a houseful of sisters, Mary enjoyed her privacy. It was what she was used to. She was the only one of her sisters who did not have to share a bedroom, and with that afforded certain expectations. There was no giggling or the rustling of sheets in the middle of the night, as she tried to sleep, for example. Her bed was as quiet as she made it.
The same principle carried out to her day to day life, despite certain changes that had been made. After her refusal of Mr. Collins’ proposal, she had made an effort to keep the burgeoning closeness between herself and her sisters, which mainly translated to her sitting off to the side, listening quietly, instead of burying her nose in a book or practising her pianoforte at all hours.
It was different; she had to admit to herself. She was not used to being party to secrets or decisions before others. She was glad of it, truth be told. But each day, as she trudged up to her room alone, she had never felt more glad than when she was able to shut the door behind her, and enter total silence.
Or as near as she could make it.
And so, it was in moments like these, where her sisters and other guests had paired off and were able to entertain themselves, even during a walk.
Her previous ramblings from Longbourn had been done by herself, as she walked a few times a week to the bookshop and lending library. Lydia and Kitty had no desire to walk without gossip, and so alone she went. She did not have to speak to anyone then, and that was how she liked it.
She was walking now.
She was not speaking, nor did anyone speak to her.
But she was not alone.
The Viscount of Abbington kept a respectable amount of distance between them, yet no one could mistake him for walking with her.
Mary sighed. This may become a problem.
Chapter Twenty
The next few days had passed rather satisfactorily, in Elizabeth’s eyes. Georgiana split her days evenly between Netherfield and Longbourn. With Mary, she practised the pianoforte, while with Lydia and Kitty she had begun learning the art of tearing bonnets and gowns to pieces and making them up new. It had been rather humourous, watching Lydia and Kitty patiently demonstrate to Georgiana how to do a simple stitch, and Elizabeth hoped that it would awaken some kind of a maturity and pride within her younger sisters.Sometimes Elizabeth joined her in with Mary at the pianoforte, as it had given her an excuse to display her poor playing in response to Georgiana’s technical perfection, and Mary’s rapidly developing skill. All in good fun. Elizabeth had never been afraid to laugh at herself, and she delighted in deliberately misreading the sheet music, to create her own composition. Georgiana also joined Elizabeth and Jane in the greenhouse.
On most days, Mr. Darcy joined Georgiana on her visits, as well as his cousin. Their wedding would be held soon, in less than two weeks, and with each visit, they had spoken more and more about the plans. Elizabeth was glad that the plans had been relatively simple. They would be married at the local church, by Reverend Matthews, who had been in that particular living for over thirty years. Elizabeth had not particularly enjoyed his sermons, so much as she had enjoyed the man, who used to give her and Jane sweets for memorising Psalms after services each Sunday. The wedding service was to take place at ten o’clock, and a luncheon would be served at Netherfield directly afterwards.
Her mama had pouted that it would not take place at Longbourn, at least until Elizabeth had pointed out the significance in Mr. Bingley offering to host their wedding luncheon at Netherfield. In truth, they had asked permission of Mr. Bingley, as an acknowledgement of all that he had done. Some, such as her cousin, Mr. Collins, would have cast them out and disowned them the moment any hint of impropriety had been suggested. Also for a more practical reason--Netherfield contained a much larger dining room area than Longbourn. The luncheon would host the Matlocks, the Gardiners and their children, their Aunt and Uncle Philips, Mr. Bingley and his sisters, Mr. Hurst, Elizabeth’s family, Sir William and his family, including Mr. Collins, and the reverend
.
The Matlocks and the Gardiners, including Lady Adelaide would be arriving the following Monday, with Elizabeth’s wedding clothes. Her mama had gone utterly silent and white in the face, when Elizabeth had revealed to her that Madame LaCour had designed her wedding dress, and even now, when her wedding clothes was referenced even vaguely, her mama could not say a single word.
Everything was finished, and there was nothing to do but count the days as they passed by--and observe. Elizabeth watched with delight as Georgiana slowly forget her society manners and giggled loudly with Lydia and Kitty, while in full view of Mr. Darcy. She was ecstatic as she listened to Lydia and Kitty whisper loudly in front of a closed door, as Mr. Bingley proposed to her dearest Jane. She felt some amusement as she observed Mary glancing at the Viscount when she believed no one to be looking--and when he did the same.