by Irene Hannon
That, too, had come without forethought. Grace wasn’t a product of the baby name book she’d perused. Nor a tribute to some beloved family member. It was a reflection of what this child had meant to her. For out of an act of violence, God had showered her with grace and redeemed her life.
But the middle name was a tribute. To Gram—and her example of strength and independence, which had given Kelsey the courage to follow a new path after her world was turned upside down.
The nurse smiled. “That’s lovely. And it suits her.”
“Would you like me to recommend a pediatrician, Kelsey?” Dr. Evans asked, stripping off her gloves as she rose.
“Yes. Thank you.”
The OB moved beside her. “You haven’t asked, but everything went fine with the delivery. No complications, and very few restrictions on activity once you’re released in a couple of days. We’ll want to keep Grace a bit longer, since she’s mildly premature, to make sure she can maintain body temperature, eat and gain weight. A week, maybe. But her doctor will decide that. Now it’s off to the nursery for you, young lady.”
She motioned to Sandra, who wheeled a crib enclosed in plastic next to the bed.
“Are you planning on breast-feeding?” The nurse lifted the baby, gently disengaging her from Kelsey’s finger. Grace’s face crumpled and she let out a howl of protest.
Kelsey’s heart contracted as the woman settled Grace in the crib. She understood how her daughter felt. She, too, wanted to howl at the separation. But at least it was only temporary.
“Yes, I am.” That, too, was a spur-of-the-moment decision. But it felt right. And at this point Kelsey was winging it, following her heart, riding on a sudden wave of euphoria.
“I’ll have a lactation consultant come in and talk with you.”
Kelsey watched Sandra wheel Grace away as Dr. Evans moved back beside the bed.
“You did great, Kelsey. And so did your coach.” She smiled and reached a hand across the bed. “It was nice to meet you, Dr. Turner.”
Kelsey’s eyes flew open. Luke! She’d forgotten all about him! Twisting her head, she watched him shake hands with the OB.
“And good luck with the youth center project,” Dr. Evans continued. “My husband and I have already purchased tickets to the dinner auction. I hope it’s a resounding success.”
“Thank you.”
“Ring if you need anything, Kelsey. I’ll be back to check on you later today.”
With that, the doctor strode toward the door, leaving her with the man whose warm, brown eyes had coaxed her through the pain. Whose firm clasp had given her a lifeline to cling to during the rocky ride. Whose gentle touches and encouragement had not only comforted her, but touched her heart and made her feel less alone, if only for a few hours.
No way could Dorothy have accomplished all that during her intense labor, much as Kelsey loved the older woman.
Her eyes misted, and she twined her fingers through his. “How can I ever thank you? You were my rock. I couldn’t have done it without you.”
One side of his mouth hitched up. “Yes, you could. Babies come, no matter what.”
She conceded the point with a slight lift of her shoulders. “True. But I couldn’t have done it as gracefully without you.” She squinted, trying to remember the past few hours, but they were all a blur. “Or did I do it gracefully? I didn’t yell at you or anything, did I?”
“Actually, my ears are still ringing.”
Her mouth dropped open. “Are you serious?”
He chuckled. “No. You were a champ.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. Really.” He tugged his fingers free, glanced at his watch and moved to the bottom of the bed. “Listen, I need to go home and clean up. Will you be okay by yourself? The call button is right there if you need anything.” He gestured to where the nurse had pinned it to the blanket.
Kelsey surveyed him. He did look in desperate need of a shower, shave and change of clothes. But she also sensed the distance he’d put between them was more than physical. His eyes were still warm and caring. But now that the crisis was over, there was a touch of reserve in them. As if he’d withdrawn a bit.
And the reason was obvious—her decision to keep Grace.
She’d known last night that he had serious reservations about such a choice. And he’d had less than twenty-four hours to digest everything she’d thrown at him. Maybe he just needed some time to think things through. After all, no matter the circumstances of her conception, how could anyone look at Grace’s sweet innocence and not fall in love with her? While Luke didn’t have the connection to her that she had, he did have a compassionate and kind heart. He could learn to care for Grace. Her daughter didn’t have to be a deal breaker.
Did she?
“Kelsey? Will you be okay?”
She’d never answered his question.
“Yes. Fine. Thank you again for everything.”
She wanted to ask when she’d see him again. But she bit back the question, not certain she wanted to hear the answer.
“Okay. Call if you need anything.”
“I will.” She summoned up a smile. “But I’ve got other reinforcements I can muster, too. I’m going to call my sister as soon as you leave. She said she’d come and stay for a few days if… When the baby was born. And Dorothy will help.”
“Sounds like you’ve got it covered.”
Not even close.
But he was talking about practical issues, not matters of the heart.
“I’ll be fine, Luke.” Her artificially cheerful tone came out a bit too bright. “You don’t need to worry.”
He hesitated, as if he wanted to say more. But in the end he nodded, turned and walked out the door.
And short of a miracle, she had a feeling that in sixteen days he was going to walk out of her life as well.
Perhaps forever.
His phone was ringing.
At some subconscious level, Luke’s brain registered the sound and identified it. But translating that awareness into action was proving difficult. After coming home, getting cleaned up and heading into town for the late Sunday morning service, the stress of last night—and the lack of sleep—had hit him. He’d crashed on the couch, out almost before he hit the cushions.
He had no idea what time it was now. And he didn’t care. All he wanted to do was sleep.
The cell phone went silent, and he started to drift off.
Thirty seconds later, it rang again.
Groaning, Luke draped a hand over his forehead, pried his eyes open and squinted at his watch. Four-thirty. He’d been out for three hours. Not enough.
The cell went silent again. The ring had been muted, and it took him a minute to realize the phone had slipped off his belt and fallen between the cushions on the sofa. He dug it out, planning to check his voicemail, when it rang again.
Someone really wanted to reach him.
Kelsey?
His pulse kicked up a notch, but a quick check of caller ID relieved his mind. It was Hannah.
“Missing me already?” He swung his feet to the floor, stifling a yawn as he sat.
“Very funny. Listen, I have some news.”
The undercurrent of excitement in her voice piqued his interest. “What’s up?”
“You’ll never guess who tweeted me last night! Well, not me directly. Carlos.”
At she rattled off the name of a Grammy-award-winning singer, Luke’s eyebrows rose. “That’s impressive. What did she say?”
“That she was touched by the story about the fundraiser and was going to check out the website. And get this—our number of followers has tripled since then! That should mean more contributions. But I have even better news. I sent her a private tweet in response, and she got back in touch after she looked at the website. She said she was going to be doing a concert in Grand Rapids the day after the dinner, and she was willing to stop in at the auction and do a couple of songs! I sent her your cell number. She’s going to call you. Isn’t that
fabulous?”
It was more than fabulous. Over the past few weeks, Luke’s work with Kelsey on PR for the youth center project had taught him the value of this kind of publicity. With a name like that aligned with their cause, they’d have no problem selling every seat at the dinner and generating national coverage for the event. All of which should translate into a big boost in their efforts to raise enough dollars to turn Carlos’s dream into a reality.
“It’s amazing.” Luke leaned back against the couch and stared out the window at the deep blue sky, cloudless on this mid-August day. “You know, if you and Kelsey hadn’t jumped on board, the youth center project would still be just a local fundraiser that might or might not get us where we need to be.”
“I didn’t do much. Setting up the Twitter page was easy. Kelsey’s done the real publicity work. I tried to call her a bunch of times to share my news, but she’s not answering or returning my calls.”
“That’s because she’s been busy having a baby.”
Dead silence greeted that announcement, followed by an explosive response.
“But she’s not due for weeks! Is she okay? Is the baby okay? What did she have? Has she picked a name? When is she—”
“Whoa! One question at a time. Everyone is fine. The baby’s name is Grace Elizabeth.”
“Grace Elizabeth. I like it. Wow. This is so cool!”
Luke could think of other ways to describe it, but he remained silent.
“So have you seen her?” Hannah prodded.
“Yes.”
“And…?”
“And what?”
“Come on, Luke! I want details. Is she ecstatic? Is the baby cute?”
He thought about the look of luminous joy on Kelsey’s face as she’d gazed at her new daughter. Pictured the big, blue eyes of the baby, fixated on her mother, and the blond ringlets.
“Yes to both.”
She huffed out a frustrated breath. “Boy, it’s like pulling teeth to get information from you. I’ll just have to call her directly. Where is she?”
“Holland Hospital.”
“Got it. When are you going to see her again?”
“I don’t know, Hannah.”
In the silence that followed, he could imagine the gears turning in his sister’s head. Could visualize her eyes narrowing.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
He raked his fingers through his hair. “It means things are complicated.”
“They don’t have to be.”
For all her maturity, Luke knew his sister still harbored juvenile romantic fantasies. But real life didn’t come with happy endings all neatly tied up with ribbon.
“It’s more complicated than you think, Hannah.”
“Why? Did the baby’s father show up?”
“No. And he won’t.”
“O-kaaay. You obviously know more about that than you’re telling. That’s fine. I’m not going to pry. But if the father’s out of the picture, what’s the big problem?”
“Geography. And don’t start on the long-distance courtship thing again. That’s a manageable short-term problem. Think long-term. My job is in Atlanta. A job I am very much looking forward to. Kelsey’s life and her work are here. She wouldn’t want to leave Michigan.”
“How do you know? Have you asked her?”
“No. It would be a little premature for that. But I know how much she loves this place. I can’t see her leaving.”
“You know, before you write her off for that—if that’s the main reason—you might want to have a little chat with her on the subject.”
A frown creased Luke’s brow. “What do you know that I don’t know?”
“Ask her yourself. I wouldn’t want to betray any confidences. In the meantime, you better check your messages. I bet you’ll find one from a very well-known singer. And now I’m calling Kelsey to give her the news and get some details on her and the baby. Talk to you later, Luke.”
The line went dead.
His mind occupied with Hannah’s comments about Kelsey, Luke shifted into autopilot and followed his sister’s instruction to check his messages. Most were from Hannah. But sure enough, the pop star had also left a message. And her phone number.
If they could actually work out the logistics, it would be a bonanza. One they needed to milk from every possible angle. And that required very special expertise. The kind Kelsey possessed.
Sliding the phone back onto his belt, Luke rose and wandered out to the deck. He needed Kelsey. And not just for the youth center project. Watching her last night, scared out of her mind but somehow managing to insert touches of humor into the situation, he’d known this was the kind of woman he wanted by his side in good times and bad. She’d had more adversity in the past year than most people endured in a lifetime, yet she hadn’t let it destroy her. By deciding to be better, not bitter—as she’d put it—she’d forged a new life for herself. Found the proverbial silver lining.
But she came with baggage. All wrapped up in a four-point-eight-pound bundle of blue eyes and blond hair. Yes, Grace was cute as a button. But she was also the child of violence and trauma.
A cloud scuttled across the sun, dimming the bright sunlight for a moment, and a chill rippled through him. He wished he could get past that, as Kelsey had. In that first, brief connection with her daughter, when Grace had taken her finger and looked into her eyes, any doubts she’d harbored about her ability to love without reservation seemed to have evaporated.
But since his hadn’t, he didn’t see how Hannah’s romantic dreams had any chance of ever becoming anything more than fantasy.
Chapter Fifteen
Pausing outside Kelsey’s door, Luke shifted the bouquet of pink roses, baby’s breath and fern from one hand to the other.
This was a mistake.
If he couldn’t deal with Kelsey’s baby, he should keep his distance, not bring her flowers—and lead her on. Yes, he wanted to check on her, confirm she was okay. But he could have accomplished that with a phone call.
Maybe he’d just leave the roses at the nurses’ station and ask one of them to—
“Luke?”
Too late. Kelsey’s greeting came from behind him, in the hall.
He took a deep breath. Summoned up a smile. Turned.
And froze.
Gone was the woman whose face had been contorted with pain while she shivered and shook in his arms less than thirty-six hours ago. Today, Kelsey was radiant, glowing—and gorgeous.
“Hi. I didn’t expect to see you.” She searched his eyes, as if looking for a change of heart he couldn’t offer, then gestured to the flowers. “And I certainly didn’t expect those.”
He cleared his throat, praying his voice wouldn’t come out in a squeak. “You earned them. You were a real trouper Saturday night.”
“It was worth it.” She reached out and fingered a petal. “The nurse told me you called last night. Sorry I missed you. I was in the nursery, trying to feed Grace.”
“How is she?”
It was a perfunctory, polite question—nothing more—and some subtle nuance in her demeanor told him she knew that.
“The neonatal specialist wants to keep her for a few days, but her early arrival didn’t seem to cause any problems other than low birth weight. The biggest worry at the moment is getting her to breast-feed. They’re concerned she doesn’t yet have the coordination to suck and swallow.”
“That can happen with preemies. She’ll pick it up.”
“Would you like to come in?” She indicated the room behind him. “Hannah called and told me the fantastic news last night. I’ve been thinking through some publicity ideas I’d like to share with you.”
“Are you certain you’re up to that?”
She gave him a steady look. “I don’t renege on commitments, Luke. Just because I had a baby doesn’t mean I’m going to drop the ball on the youth center project. I know how to juggle multiple duties and obligations.” She held his gaze for a few seconds, th
en lifted one shoulder and lightened her voice. “Besides, I need a diversion. I’m not used to sitting around all day doing nothing.”
“You could use a little downtime after all that’s happened in the past day and a half. But if you’re sure, I’ll stay for a minute. I’m on my way to a special board meeting at St. Francis, to discuss the latest development, and this way I can pass on your thoughts as well.”
He stepped aside to allow her to enter, setting the flowers on her nightstand after following her in. She eased gingerly onto the side of the bed as he took the chair.
“Why don’t you start? Any updates since last night?” She shifted, as if trying to get comfortable.
“Yes. I called our Grammy winner, and she not only agreed to come, she donated two pairs of concert tickets and a backstage tour to the auction. She also solicited some of her celebrity friends to donate autographed personal items.”
Luke ticked off a few names, and Kelsey’s eyebrows rose.
“That’s impressive. And it makes my job even easier. Let me run you through some of the publicity ideas I’ve already jotted down.”
Reaching over to the nightstand, she picked up a piece of paper filled with bullet points and briefed him. When she finished, she lowered the sheet to her lap.
“You know, the support of a name entertainer gives us a great opportunity to not only meet, but exceed, your goal. This is exactly what the dinner auction needed in order to garner big bucks and national media attention. If we milk this opportunity for all it’s worth, we might be able to raise not just enough money to build the center, but to create an endowment that could fund operating expenses for years to come. Wouldn’t that be fabulous?”
Her eyes were shining at the prospect, her face luminous, and Luke had difficulty focusing on her words. Only in its absence did he recognize the tension that had sharpened her features for all the weeks he’d known her. The new, subtle softening enhanced her already considerable beauty.
With an effort, he pulled himself back to the conversation. She’d made a comment that needed a response—something about establishing an endowment.
“Yeah. That would be wonderful. And you can take a lot of the credit for our success. I might have been able to get the ball rolling without you, but I wouldn’t have scored a home run.”