The Flying Book

by David Blatner

  A cartoon originally published in the NEW YORKER, October 2, 2000.

  As you take your seat, you may see cold air condensing as it enters the air-conditioning vents inside the plane, especially on hot and muggy days; don’t worry, it’s not smoke! And the clunking and thumping you hear is just the crew wheeling food into the galleys and loading cargo into bays in the belly of the airplane. Sometimes the cargo rolls forward and hits the stops at one end or the other, shaking the whole plane a bit. The cargo doors are large and are typically closed by an electric motor, so they whir and thump.

  When the lead plane gets the signal to go, and begins to gather speed, it looks to me like somebody’s idea of a joke, as if you and I decided we could get a mobile home airborne if we could just get it rolling fast enough. I think a plane’s first few moments off the ground look almost as untenable from the ground as they feel from inside.

  —Layne Ridley, WHITE KNUCKLES

  Then, when everyone is boarded and seated, the flight attendants close and arm the doors (if the doors are opened before they’re de-armed, the emergency slides shoot out and inflate). Next, after another flight attendant double-checks that the doors are armed, they announce “cross-check complete” and the pilots can start to back away from the gate.

  As the airplane lifts off the ground, your body momentarily becomes heavier (it’s one of those wacky laws of physics). This force is measured in Gs (for gravity). At 1.1 G your weight is 10 percent greater than normal. You can easily see this effect if you carry a postal scale on board with you and weigh something during takeoff. Or try the following experiment: Put two paper clips on a thin rubber band; attach one to the seat in front of you and the other to something heavy. Upon takeoff, the heavy object gets heavier and pulls down on the rubber band.

  Of all the mysterious things that happen during a flight, one of the strangest occurs just as the engines are starting up: The air-conditioning stops, and the lights in the cabin blink out for a moment. In fact, this can happen up to four times before all the engines are going. These flashes of power seem more like brownouts and can give the impression that the whole airplane is malfunctioning. However, the power lapse actually occurs because the pilots must switch the electrical current from the APU (or the airport’s power supply) to the generators in the main engines.

  When the power comes back on, a bell sometimes dings, and if you listen carefully, you can hear the jet engines start to turn with a low hum (usually first on the left wing and then the right).

  Airplanes almost always take off into the wind. While it seems like a headwind would slow them down, in fact the speed of the aircraft isn’t important at takeoff; it’s the speed of the air over the wings that is crucial. If there’s a 20-mph headwind and the airplane is moving at 100 mph, the relative airspeed is 120 mph. But if the airplane flew with the wind instead, the airspeed would only be 80 mph.

  The pilots don’t always start the engines while you’re still sitting at the gate. The airplane may be silently pushed back to the taxiway by a truck (a really powerful tow truck), or it may “power back” with its thrust reversers. The latter can be surprisingly loud, as the engines must rev up and blow a lot of air to move the heavy aircraft.

  On the Taxiway

  At peak travel times, when airplanes are backed up waiting to take off, you may spend a lot of time taxiing to the runway—plenty of time to listen to the sounds around you. It’s not uncommon to smell a burning, acrid smoke while taxiing. The good news is that you’re not smelling your own airplane burning; the bad news is that you’re smelling the exhaust from the airplanes in front of you. Fortunately, it passes as soon as you’re in the air.

  As the aircraft rolls steadily toward the runway, you’ll hear bump, bump, bump as the wheels run over lights or metal expansion joints embedded in the pavement. The brakes often squeal and whine when the airplane slows or stops; this does not mean they’re failing! Airbus aircraft feature a Power Transfer Unit (PTU)—it transfers power from one engine to another—which unfortunately sounds like an electric drill mounted on the bottom of the fuselage, between the wings. You may hear this startling noise a few times before takeoff and again when taxiing to the gate after landing.

  Then, somewhere along the ride to the runway, the pilots extend the wing’s flaps and leading edge slats to assist in takeoff. If you’re sitting near the wings, you’ll likely hear the whirring noise of gears and a metal screw turning, sometimes surprisingly loudly. When air traffic control gives the pilots permission to take off, the pilots first alert the flight attendants with a brief announcement and then push the engine throttles forward.

  There are few things on Earth that seem as improbable as a jet airplane taking off—whether you’re watching it or sitting inside of it. The engines suddenly get very loud, and the bumps from the wheels quicken. Occasionally, depending on wind and runway conditions, the whole aircraft starts to shake, and items in the galleys that were meant to be fastened down fall over with clattering bangs. Sometimes it sounds and feels as if the pilots are straining the jet to its limits and the whole aircraft could fall apart at any minute. This is only an illusion—airplanes have more than enough power to take off and are far stronger and more flexible than they appear.

  First Moments of Flight

  At last the pilots tilt the nose of the airplane up, increasing the angle at which the wings approach the air, and the aircraft gains enough lift to take off. As the wheels leave the ground, you may hear a dull thud as they extend to the end of their struts. Suddenly, the airplane seems to climb rapidly—at what may feel like a forty-five-degree angle, but the maximum allowed is twenty degrees, and the average is only fifteen degrees.

  Occasionally, air traffic control instructs the pilots to turn almost immediately after takeoff (for noise control or simply to get the airplane heading in the right direction). This, too, may feel extreme (as though the airplane were banking at forty or even sixty degrees); however, the maximum turning angle allowed is thirty degrees, and pilots rarely turn more than twenty or twenty-five degrees.

  Next, the pilots raise the landing gear in order to streamline the airplane. You’ll hear a clunking sound in the belly of the fuselage as the wheels are raised and the landing gear door closes (if you’re sitting over the landing gear, it may even sound and feel like a car running over a small branch on the road). Remember that those wheels are spinning at over 100 mph when you leave the ground, so the brakes are automatically applied, which can also cause a bit of vibration during the first moments of flight.

  Then, seemingly for no reason, you’ll hear the engines lower in pitch and volume, and the airplane seems to slow down and perhaps even drop in altitude. This doesn’t happen on every flight, but when it does you might think that something is wrong. It’s not; the pilots reduce power and level off a bit because of noise abatement guidelines or air traffic control’s altitude restrictions. The airplane is actually still increasing in speed and altitude, but our bodies are extremely sensitive to changes in acceleration. It’s like when a car enters a freeway—after the initial boost of speed, it’s very difficult to get a sense of how fast you’re moving.

  Now those flaps that were extended before takeoff in order to maximize the lifting power of the wings are no longer needed, and the pilots retract them (with the same sort of whirring noises). This may happen two or three times, as they’re usually retracted in small increments.

  Cruising Bings and Bongs

  For all the high-tech gadgets and brilliantly designed features on the modern jet airplane, the system the crew uses to communicate with one another is surprisingly simple: bells or chimes. You’ll hear bings or bongs sporadically throughout the flight: When a flight attendant in the front of the airplane wants someone in the back to pick up the intercom phone, he or she will signal with one or two chimes. When the pilot is ready for a cup of coffee, you’ll hear a chime (usually a slightly different tone). When a passenger presses the call button, you’ll hear a chime, too. (W
orse, when a small child finds this button, you may hear a series of chimes.)

  The pilots also use chimes to signal that the airplane has climbed above 10,000 feet, and some airlines signal again when the airplane passes through 18,000 feet. When the seatbelt light goes on or off, it’s accompanied by a chime. Also, in some aircraft, the chimes are accompanied by colored lights at the front and back of the cabin: one light means a call button was pressed in one of the lavatories, a second one indicates a crew-to-crew message, and a third light means a passenger call. The one thing a chime does not signal is that there’s an emergency, so you don’t have to be concerned about chimes.

  While the aircraft is cruising, the only other sound you typically hear is the engine noise (which is louder at the back of the airplane) and the sound of air moving over the skin of the airplane (which is much louder than you’d expect).

  The Approach

  As the airplane approaches its destination, the ride seems to get a little quieter (though by then your ears are so used to the background roar that it’s hard to tell). This is because the pilots have reduced the engine power considerably, and the airplane is probably just gliding down at idle power toward the airport, much like taking your foot off the gas pedal on a highway exit ramp. Then, as the airplane slows, the pilots extend the wing flaps once again. Birds do the same thing: As a bird lands, it spreads its feathers out to gain better lift at slow speeds.

  You’ll likely hear another chime as the airplane passes down through 10,000 feet (this isn’t automatic; the pilot has to flick a switch, so it’s rarely at exactly this altitude), and the pilots lower the landing gear around 2,000 feet, with the corresponding mechanical clunks and thuds.

  If you have a view of the wings, you can usually see the big metal flaps on top of the wings, called spoilers, being raised a little during the approach. Spoilers make the airplane lose altitude and slow down, but they can also cause some choppy vibrations.

  Finally, as the airplane is almost touching down on the runway, you’ll often hear a sudden rise in the pitch and volume of the engines. Pilots sometimes increase the throttle while making small last-minute adjustments for as smooth a landing as possible.

  Landing

  A go-around or missed approach—in which the airplane either lands and then immediately takes off again or doesn’t even touch down before pulling up and circling around for another approach—can scare even the most seasoned passenger. However, go-arounds are more common than you might think, and they are almost never a sign of an emergency. There are reports of pilots going around because of a sudden unexpected gust of wind, a stray deer on the runway, or even just because something doesn’t “feel right.” It’s important to remember that a go-around is not a last-ditch maneuver; the pilots discuss the potential for a go-around before every landing, and air traffic control reserves airspace for go-arounds, just in case.

  Nevertheless, most passengers breathe a sigh of relief when the wheels finally touch down, the spoilers on the wings pop up, and the reverse thrusters kick in. These thrusters don’t actually shoot air out of the front of the jet engine, as one might think. Air still gets sucked in, but it is then deflected forward by metal panels that block the path of the exhaust stream (either inside or behind the engine itself). However, while the reverse thrusters help the airplane slow down, airplanes can stop even without them. The wheel brakes alone are so powerful that a loaded 747 can stop in as few as 3,500 feet, absorbing as much kinetic energy as a million automobile brakes.

  As the airplane rolls down the runway it’s very common to hear a thumping, which can sound like one of the landing gear tires has blown out and is flapping around. Actually, the sound is simply the result of the pilots landing right in the center of the runway, and the wheels are running over the runway centerline lights. Some pilots try to land slightly off center to avoid this distracting noise.

  Finally, as the “fasten seat belt” sign is turned off at the gate (with another chime, of course), you may see the lights flash off and on again, as the airplane’s power supply is switched from the engines to the gate power (or the APU). The flight is over; now it’s time to tackle the really scary part of the trip: the airport and the drive into town.

  The Trouble with Cell Phones

  There are two kinds of people in the world: those who are content to leaf through a magazine or book while waiting for takeoff, and those who get itchy when their cell phone, pager, laptop computer, and handheld digital datebook aren’t turned on and within easy reach. Unfortunately for this second group, the airlines and the Federal Aviation Administration have instituted rules restricting the use of these sorts of electronic “vices” on airplanes.

  Currently, gadgets that intentionally emit signals—such as cell phones and wireless e-mail and Web surfing tools—are totally prohibited from the time the airplane leaves the departure gate until it arrives at its destination gate (called “from block to block” in the trade). Other electronic tools—such as laptops, CD players, and handheld games—are banned until the aircraft reaches 10,000 feet.

  Some technology lovers complain because airlines prohibit their favorite toys but allow electronic devices such as heart pacemakers, electric shavers, voice recorders, and hearing aids. This is not a minor issue; there are reports that the ban on cell phones is now the second largest cause of “air rage,” after alcohol.

  The problem is simple: All electronic devices emit electromagnetic radiation, and those emissions can possibly interfere with the airplane’s sensitive electronics (like the navigation equipment, which is partly based on radio transmissions). That’s just the nature of electronics. When you turn on a digital calculator, it creates a very weak electromagnetic signal. When you turn on a radio, it creates a stronger one. A cell phone emits a lot of signals, even when you’re not talking on it. This is why many hospitals ban cell phones from areas with critical health-monitoring devices.

  Electromagnetic radiation is like light (in fact, what we call visible light is actually a form of electromagnetic radiation), so imagine that your laptop computer is emitting a blue light and the airplane’s radio transmitter is emitting and receiving a red light. If you happen to be sitting near an antenna (which is on the outside of the airplane), your blue light could contaminate the red light a little, causing signals to and from the airplane to be less clear than they should be.

  Why the 10,000-foot rule? Because the airspace around airports and cities is already lit up with an astonishing amount of electromagnetic radiation, and the airlines figure it’s better not to add to the jumble. Plus, pilots would have more time to deal with any interference at higher altitudes than they would closer to the ground.

  Unfortunately, there is no proof that laptops or even cell phones actually do cause any significant problems. A number of airline pilots have provided anecdotal evidence (like the time a pilot realized that whenever a particular passenger turned on his laptop, the aircraft’s compass would deviate ten degrees off course), but no one has been able to scientifically repeat the interference in experiments. Perhaps the problem only occurs rarely, based on the electromagnetic radiation in the air on a given day. As the FAA’s Thomas McSweeny noted, “We are preventing the extremely remote event.”

  The U.S. Federal Communications Commission (FCC) also bans the use of cell phones in flight, but for a completely different reason. When you use a cell phone on the ground, your phone typically receives and transmits signals with only one antenna station at a time—whichever is currently within direct line of sight. From the air, your phone could communicate with dozens or hundreds of antennae, which could (in theory) disrupt communications for cell phone users on the ground, according to the FCC and cell phone companies. The onboard phones, which are often expensive for passengers to use, work on a completely different antenna system than regular cell phones and are shielded in order to avoid any radio interference.

  Tips for Anxious Fliers

  About one out of every three people feel some
anxiety when flying, so if you’re one of them you’re not alone! However, the majority of anxious fliers aren’t actually afraid of flying; they just don’t like the emotions and sensations they feel when they fly. This is why safety statistics don’t usually make anxious fliers feel any better. “I know all that,” they reply, “but I still don’t enjoy flying.” Plus, the more airlines make flying feel like riding a crowded bus, the less comfortable people feel and the faster their anxiety increases.

  Of course, there are lots of reasons that people get nervous in airplanes. Some folks are afraid of being stuck in a closed space (claustrophobic), and others are afraid of heights (acrophobic)—though ironically, many acrophobes have no trouble flying or even skydiving because there’s so little frame of reference that far up. But for the most part, nervous fliers suffer from two things: the feeling of not being in control and not understanding how or why airplanes work. This isn’t surprising: you aren’t in control when flying as a passenger. But not being in control of the aircraft doesn’t mean you’re “out of control,” and it doesn’t mean you’re not safe. You are still in control of yourself and how you react to your environment. And you’re still very safe. Most people think they’re in control when driving, and yet about 300 times more people die on the roads in the United States than in airplane crashes. Remember: You can’t rely on your anxiety level (or how much adrenaline is pumping in your bloodstream) to tell you how much danger you’re in.

  Often, people—particularly women—develop flying anxieties between ages twenty-five and thirty-five, and especially after a major event such as the birth of a child or a parent’s death. It’s also very common for people to become anxious about flying after a scary experience such as significant turbulence or a go-around (when the airplane is about to land but suddenly takes off again). These unexpected events can be really frightening if you don’t know that they’re almost never actually dangerous. Of course, terrorism or airline disasters, such as the hijackings in September 2001, tend to confirm people’s worst fears of not being in control, though they hardly affect overall airline safety.