The Winnowing Season

by Cindy Woodsmall

  Sandra cinched her housecoat. “How long before you leave?”

  Casey’s bottom lip quivered. “You’re weaving?”

  “It’s what he does, kid. Get used to it.”

  He used to think he could change Sandra’s mind about people, make a positive difference that would affect how she treated Casey. But Sandra was too set in her ways, and he was too interested in building a life with Rhoda to keep trying. If it weren’t for Casey, he would wash his hands of Sandra. But Casey deserved as much stability in her life as he could offer—just as he would want that for Arie or Isaac.

  He patted Casey’s back. “Not for a while yet.”

  She laid her head on his shoulder, and he swayed with her, hoping she’d go back to sleep, wishing he could take her with him. “I’m sure the farm is covered with reporters,” he whispered. “It’ll be a week or two before I can slip back. Unnoticed anyway—unless the lawyer gives me good news. But you can trust this: I’m not leaving here until after I see that lawyer. End of conversation.”

  “End of your life on the outside is more like it.”

  He wanted to say, “If you’ve been lying to me all these years, it’ll be the end of us.” But he couldn’t just walk away. The reason was in his arms, her little fists holding tight to his shirt as if she knew that clinging to him was her best chance at a decent life.

  “Yes, that’s correct.” Samuel took notes as he talked on the phone. “When will the order arrive? Three days? That’ll be fine. Thank you.”

  He hung up. If Jacob had been here, he would have figured out how many cans of oil they needed in the first order.

  When was he coming home? It’d been a week since Rhoda had been cleared. An occasional reporter still dropped by, but surely his brother could deal with that.

  Samuel glanced at the numbers on his scratch pad. The first time he had placed an order for oil to spray the trees, he’d used figures from their orchard in Pennsylvania and allowed for the extra acres of trees here, but he hadn’t noticed that the size of the oil containers was different. Jacob would have caught that with one eye closed.

  Oh, well. Who cared? So they paid shipping fees twice instead of once.

  Rhoda was free and clear of all suspicion, and that just might keep him from getting stressed about daily life for years to come.

  “Look.” Rhoda walked into the office with a stack of envelopes. Ziggy and Zara came in behind her. Samuel wasn’t surprised she’d checked the mail again to see if Jacob had written and then probably had come here to see if he’d called or left a message.

  Most of the letters would have notes of encouragement or congratulations, and some would have checks—all from strangers who wanted to help them financially. The news had reported that the police had emptied their greenhouses of Rhoda’s herbs. Of course the police had returned them or at least the pots, but most of the plants had died during the process. “That’s unbelievable, isn’t it?”

  She paused. “Still no calls from Jacob?”

  He shook his head and waited for disappointment or concern to flicker in her eyes again. Instead, he saw something new: anger.

  “Why do I even bother asking anymore?”

  It was the first time she’d said anything negative about Jacob. Samuel knew he should assure her of Jacob’s love. But that feeling wrestled with the powerful urge to pull her into his arms and assure her that he would never treat her the way Jacob had. Never.

  She tapped the letters against her hand. “What are we gonna do with all this money that keeps coming in?”

  He leaned back in his chair. “What do you want to do with it?”

  She moved to the same side of the desk and sat on the edge of it, facing him. “I want you”—she rapped the letters against his shoulder—“to have a strong opinion of what we should do. Then the right solution will come to me.”

  “That’s easy.” He chuckled. “I think we should fly to Hawaii and take a vacation.”

  She laughed. “Your saying absurd things does not help. It has to be a doable idea.”

  He had a doable idea he would like to share with her—courting. The temptation to let her know tried to overpower his will. Was Jacob even worthy of her? Apparently Rhoda continued to think so—or did she?

  He stood, and her laughter faded as she stared into his eyes. Could she feel the powerful draw as he did?

  “I’ve been wondering about something.” Unable to resist the pull for one more second, he put a hand on the desk beside her. Would she move away or push him back? “Do you have any clue what’s been on my mind for months?”

  She shook her head, but she didn’t budge.

  He leaned in closer, his lips inches from her ear. “You.” His heart pounded as he backed away, but only far enough to see her lips. He slid his hand around the small of her back and lifted her to her feet. “Understand?”

  She stared at him, her head barely shaking.

  He put his free hand behind her head and did what he had been longing to do for months.

  He pressed his lips against hers. If only this moment could last—

  And turn her heart toward him.

  FORTY

  Rhoda melted into Samuel’s arms. Into his warm kiss. Unable—or perhaps unwilling—to resist. But this had to stop.

  She had to stop.

  Pushing against him, she ducked her head.

  His breath was hot against her skin. “I love—”

  “Shhh.” She covered his lips with her trembling fingers. “You don’t know what you’re saying … or doing.”

  He rested his forehead on hers. “Listen to me. I do know. This isn’t about the heat of the moment. I’m in love with you. Surely you know that.”

  The dogs ran barking from the room. Had someone pulled into the driveway?

  Her heart pounded so hard she felt weak. “No.” She slid from his arms and closed the office door. “What you’re saying would be hundreds of times worse than when you turned in the report on Rueben. I’ll be the Jezebel who bewitched you, and that’s how I’ll be seen for the rest of my life. Even my family will blame me! And they would be right.”

  “No.” His whisper sounded desperate. “Rhoda, please. The outrage will blow over. I’ll weather the storm with you. It can’t be worse than what we’ve already been through together.”

  “I was innocent then! This”—she gestured between his chest and hers—“is not innocence. Far, far from it.”

  “I know it’ll be a nightmare for a while. And Jacob will hate us for a season too. But we’ll have each other. If you’ll think about it for a minute, you’ll know that’s what we’ve had from the start.”

  “Rhodes?” Jacob’s voice called from outside the barn, startling her.

  How could God let him show up now? What could she say to him?

  “Samuel, please. Don’t tell Jacob. He loves you. And me. I’m begging you—for his sake. For mine.”

  Samuel said nothing. She clutched the doorknob, drew a deep breath, and opened the door, praying that God would forgive her—and that Jacob never knew he needed to.

  “There she is.” Jacob clung to a bouquet of flowers but dropped his suitcase and strode toward her. “We have dogs?”

  “Ya.”

  “When I saw them coming out of the barn, I thought this would be the best place to search for you.” He engulfed her in a hug. “And I was right.”

  “You’re home.” Her voice cracked, and her body trembled.

  “It’s okay.” He lowered his lips to hers, but she turned her face so he ended up kissing her cheek. Her warm skin tasted of home, reminding him of the future he had to look forward to. But it would be a while before he shook the reality of everything he’d learned from the lawyer. Should he tell her?

  He stepped back, ready to gaze into her eyes and feel their bond resurge, but she only glanced at him. He held out the flowers to her.

  “They’re lovely.” She took them. “Denki. Kumm.” She took him by the hand and tugged him toward the ba
rn door. “Leah will be thrilled you’re finally here.”

  “Leah?” He pulled against her, making her stop.

  Taut lines crossed her face despite her smile. “You’ve had quite the haircut.”

  What was going on? There seemed to be a mountain between them.

  He moved in closer, longing to embrace her. “Rhodes, sweetheart, are you okay?”

  “Of course. It’s just … it’s been a long two months.” She finally looked at him. “Where have you been?”

  “You know where. Well, you don’t know exactly, but I’m here now. To stay.” That might not be as easy as he’d hoped, but he was determined the lawyer would find a solution.

  Something squeaked—a floorboard, a door hinge—and Jacob looked toward the office.

  Samuel nodded. “Welcome home.”

  It wasn’t what Samuel said so much as the distance in his voice that made suspicion run through him. Samuel didn’t even move to shake his hand or embrace him. Fresh tension seemed to fill more than just Rhoda’s face.

  “What’s going on here?” He moved toward Samuel. “Have you two been arguing again?”

  Rhoda stepped between them. “No.” She glanced at Samuel and tugged on the lapel of Jacob’s coat. “Let’s just go inside.”

  The lawyer’s words echoed inside his heart. Sandra’s taken you for a ride. Lied to you. Tricked you. Used you. And you let her.

  Jacob pulled free of Rhoda. “I’ll ask again. What’s going on?” He pointed at Samuel. “Answer me!”

  The dogs rushed to Samuel’s side, barking furiously. Rhoda’s eyes met Samuel’s. Did she just shake her head at Samuel?

  “Hush.” Samuel clapped his hands, and the dogs quieted.

  Jacob couldn’t believe the nervousness between Samuel and Rhoda.

  “Samuel,”—he softened his voice—“what have you done?”

  “I … I’m sorry.” Samuel closed his eyes. “It’s been just me and Rhoda for so long, and I … I made a pass at her.” Samuel studied her. “She’s upset by what I did. But she chooses you.”

  Jacob angled his head, catching Rhoda’s eye. “You’re covering for him? Why?”

  “It was a mistake, Jacob. Let it go.” She tugged on his coat. “Please.”

  “It? What it?”

  “Stop!” The desperation in Rhoda’s voice struck him hard. “Just stop. You think you’re the only one to make mistakes that others have to pay for?”

  The dogs moved to each side of her, standing sentry as they barked and growled at Jacob.

  Rhoda turned to Samuel. “Make them be quiet.”

  Samuel snapped his fingers and pointed toward the office. The dogs tucked their tails and walked inside. He closed the door behind them.

  Rhoda shook the flowers at Jacob. “I’ve been paying a price for your mistakes since that woman first called for you in October. I’ve been fighting so much, even the possibility of going to jail, and where were you?” She touched her chest with the flowers, and petals fell to the dirt floor. “But we muddled through, and the ordeal ended a week ago. A week, Jacob!” She looked heavenward. “I needed you.” She threw the bouquet at him. “Do not blame him. You want to be angry with someone about what happened, look in the mirror!”

  “Didn’t you get my letter?”

  “If you’d written, I’d have received it.”

  If? Jacob felt his world crumbling. He looked at Samuel. “I trusted you with the most valuable part of my life.” He focused on Rhoda. “I saw you on the news, hugging and grinning up at Samuel like you loved him.”

  She studied Samuel and shook her head. “You saw relief and a celebration.”

  Jacob didn’t believe her, and the fact that they were trying to protect each other told him everything he needed to know. “And if I’d been a fly on the wall when Samuel made a pass at you, what would I have seen?”

  The taut lines returned to her face—and he knew.

  Guilt.

  That’s what he saw on her face. He turned to Samuel. “What a fine man you are, Brother?”

  “Jacob.” Rhoda clutched his jacket. “We can get past this. All three of us.”

  “Maybe.” He gazed into her eyes. “Did you kiss my brother, Rhodes?”

  She released his lapels and lowered her head.

  He lifted her chin. Tears filled her eyes, and he hated what was happening to them. “You mean everything to me, Rhodes.”

  “I know, and I shouldn’t have blamed you. Please don’t throw our future away because of a few seconds.”

  “Do you care for Samuel?”

  She peered beyond Jacob and studied Samuel.

  Jacob shifted, breaking her view of Samuel. “Rhodes?”

  “Jacob, please.”

  He grabbed his bag. “I’ll make this easy for you. I owe you that much, so the story that gets told to the others in the house is that we’re not seeing each other anymore. They’ll assume my absences and baggage were too much.” His heart ached. “Unfortunately for me, I guess it’s actually true.” He walked off.

  Rhoda hurried after him. “Where are you going?”

  “I’m going inside. I’m the one who talked you two into coming to this place. I devised the plan so we could afford it. And I’ve spent months wanting to come home.” He paused and held up a hand. “Surprise. Here I am.” He walked off and called over his shoulder. “The question is, where will you go?”

  FORTY-ONE

  Leah went out the front door of the house, carrying a plate of fresh-baked cookies. The tension between her brothers was insufferable—four days of it!

  And poor Rhoda …

  Leah had seen her try to talk to Jacob at least a half dozen times. How many other times had she tried?

  Leah knew what Rhoda didn’t. This is what Jacob had been like when he had returned home after living among the Englisch for a few years, returned with bruises, stitches, and a cast on his leg. A month passed before he began to respond as the brother she’d once knew. She still had no clue what had happened to put him in that condition. What she did know is that he was hurting. Samuel was too. And Rhoda.

  But why? She could only guess.

  For the most part during the last four days, Jacob had stayed out of sight, working in the orchard and not even coming in for meals. He left before daylight and returned after bedtime. Leah packed him food and made sure he took it with him. Did he eat or just toss it out?

  She had a plan, and she’d enlisted Landon’s help to pull it off. If things went according to plan, Samuel and Jacob would both land in the barn about the same time. It would be the first time they had been in the same room since Jacob had arrived home, and Leah intended to get them to talk.

  Streams of sunlight broke through the clouds, and the damp March air held a promise of warmer weather. She went into the barn where Samuel was sharpening the pruning shears.

  He glanced up. “Landon wanted me to meet you in the barn so I could eat cookies?”

  “Remember some of the times I brought cookies out to you, Jacob, and Eli? You’d stop working and we’d talk for a bit?” She held up the plates to him.

  He took a cookie. “Sure. Why?”

  “Leah?” Jacob walked into the barn. He spotted Samuel and immediately turned to go the other way.

  Leah caught him by the arm. “Can we talk?”

  Jacob shot a disgusted look in Samuel’s direction. “I got things to do.”

  She held up the plate of cookies. “Please.”

  “Let him go, Leah.” Samuel waved the cookie in the air and half of it broke off and fell to the ground. “He’s always choosing to hide from the past rather than look to the future.”

  Jacob wheeled around. “Exactly what future would you like me to gaze upon? The one of mine you ruined? The one where you ride off with Rhoda?”

  Samuel yanked off his hat. “I never wanted anything to happen with her. I did my part the best I knew how. It was your place to be here for Rhoda. Her heart was fully committed to you. If you’d come
home or written or called, we wouldn’t be in this fix.”

  “You don’t think that’s what I wanted? Regret over not being here gnawed at me all the time. And I was trying to do what was right. It wasn’t just me involved, Samuel.”

  “Sandra wasn’t the most important person in your life!”

  “You don’t know what she’s been through. Her childhood was a nightmare, and she’s a mess, but she has a child who deserves better than what was dished out to Sandra.” Jacob gestured heavenward. “And I wasn’t going on trips to Disneyland! Sandra’s apartment is a dingy, run-down place with no hope. I was trying to keep Sandra strong so she had it in her to do right by Casey. What would you do to protect Arie or Isaac?”

  “Anything that was required of me. But Sandra’s daughter isn’t one of them.”

  “Is Casey any less important? Is that how God would feel? I don’t think so. And neither do you. But I wasn’t gone this last time because of Sandra. I was trying to protect Rhoda from my past, and I went to a lawyer just like you said. You know what I found out about my construction job troubles? That Sandra’s deceived me all along. All along!” Jacob took the plate from Leah and flung it against the wall, shattering the plate and scattering cookies. “I finally get home to discover I was duped here too.” Jacob’s eyes glistened as if maybe tears were in them. “I want to forgive Rhoda. God knows how much I want to forgive her.” He paused, clearly taking a moment to compose himself. “But I can’t even forgive myself right now.”

  Jacob turned and walked out the barn door.

  Samuel threw his hat onto the ground. “Your need to be forgiven is between you and God, and you’re taking it out on Rhoda!”

  Jacob turned. “You want me to take full responsibility for what’s happened. But you had just as much of a role in it, Brother.” He stared into Samuel’s eyes. “My trusted, loyal brother.”