Winter

by Michelle Love

  I can see a happy future with this man. And I am happy, even though I know that one day it will end when he leaves me to go to Mars. But for now, he’s mine and he’s here with me. I can’t ask for any more than that.

  RYKER

  As the rain makes the tin roof of the shed we’re standing under sing, I hold Gia’s hand as the rocket lifts off the ground and heads up into the sky. It’s the third test of using the new rocket boosters with the weight the actual ship will weigh.

  A year has flown by and we’re getting closer with each passing month. Gia and I, along with about a hundred others on my staff, turn to watch the large board with the statistics on it that’s telling us the speed and altitude of the weighted down rockets.

  The first two attempts had the rockets giving out before leaving the Earth’s gravitational pull. With some major tweaking, we are hoping we’ve finally got it right.

  Gia’s hand grips mine as the numbers climb to near where the first test ended when the rocket started to fall back to land in the Atlantic Ocean. She breathes a sigh of relief as it passes that mark and keeps going at full speed. “No loss of speed yet,” she says.

  I give her a sideways glance to let her know not to say another word, lest she jinx it. I’m not normally a superstitious man but I’m on pins and needles here and grasping at anything. “Be careful, Gia.”

  She nods, knowing how I feel about things and keeps her eyes on the board. The mark where the second test failed comes up and the thing is still moving on. Three minutes later it’s reached the outer atmosphere and the rockets go out as there’s no need for them any longer. Gravity is no longer pulling at the cylinder they took up.

  Cheers ring out and Gia jumps into my arms. I feel the wetness of her tears as she cries with what I hope is joy at the fantastic step we’ve taken. When she pulls her head away from my neck, I see the tears streaming down her pink cheeks and kiss her. “It’s going to be okay, baby. We’re still a few years away from being ready to go.”

  “I know, I do. It’s just that it brought it all home, that’s all. I’ll stop crying. I will.” She buries her face in my chest as her feet touch the ground.

  Everyone’s so excited no one notices how she’s reacting to what all consider great news. I pull a handkerchief out of my pocket and give it to her. Discreetly, she wipes away her tears and blows her nose.

  She’s yet to change her mind about going to Mars and I’ve yet to change mine. We both know this thing we have will only last so long but it doesn’t do a thing to help either of us deal well with that fact.

  Once I’m sure she’s alright, I take her by the hand and lead her to the control tower to make the announcement to the waiting media about how well the test went. “You don’t have to say a word, Gia. Just stay by my side while I answer the reporter’s questions. Okay?”

  “Okay,” she says. “I’m sorry for crying.”

  “Don’t be.” I run my arm around her shoulders and give her a squeeze. “It shows me just how much you love me.”

  She nods and looks down. “It shows me that too.”

  As soon as we enter the tower, the questions are fired at me. “Mr. Crawford, do you think with the success of this test that you’ve moved the send-off date any closer?” a small woman with black-rimmed glasses and a large microphone asks me.

  “I have no idea about that yet,” I answer her, truthfully. I have no idea what other problems we will encounter after all.

  “Aren’t you Gia Flynn?” one of the male reporters asks Gia as she holds tight to my hand.

  She looks at me with surprise and I answer for her, “This is Gia Flynn. Do you have a question for her?”

  “I do as a matter of fact,” he says then looks at her. “Miss Flynn, it’s been published recently that you have worked not only on the fuel for the missions but also supplements to sustain life in both the human travelers and the animals as well. My question to you is, how are they to maintain nourishment while on the planet? And will they be able to manufacture more of the supplements when they get to Mars?”

  “I’m working with a team on that. You see, we will be sending drone-operated cargo ships to the planet at three-month intervals. More supplements will be sent with each shipment. I’m going to stay here, on Earth and continue to work on developing things to help the pioneers make a life on the planet. And all of our new inventions will be sent out to them.”

  His eyes move to me and he asks, “Mr. Crawford, it’s long been known that you will be on the first mission to leave for Mars. It’s also been obvious that you and Miss Flynn have a strong relationship. Have you changed your mind about going to Mars with Miss Flynn staying here?”

  I look at Gia and find her looking down with a sad expression on her pretty face. I hate to see it. “I’m still going to Mars.” And her expression only looks sadder. “Miss Flynn and I have discussed things. And we prefer to keep our personal lives out of the news.”

  More questions come and I answer them as I notice Gia’s hand go loose in mine. She inches away from my side until suddenly, she’s no longer there and I’m looking around to see where she’s gone.

  “Mr. Crawford, is it true that Markov Global is using these rocket boosters too?” a tall lady asks me.

  “They are. We shared our technology with them so they would manufacture the rockets for free. I expect them to be near the same timeline as our company is. And that’s all the questions for today. The next thing we’re working on is the actual ship. A test will be done when that’s accomplished and then we’ll be getting ready for the actual trip to Mars. Thank you all for coming today.” I leave the tower and find Gia sitting on a bench, alone.

  She’s soaking wet as she’s sitting in the pouring rain. I go to her and lift her up, then take her to the car and find she’s in the poorest of moods. “Baby, there are still years before I leave.”

  “But you will leave,” she says as rain water drips off her and onto the leather seat. “I think I’ve been like an ostrich with its head in the sand this last year. I haven’t let myself think about you leaving at all. And now it’s obvious to me that you will leave me. You will leave me alone here and I don’t know how I’m going to take it. I’m taking the thought of it very badly.”

  “You could always come too. There are others who can do what you do here on Earth. You could start training people to take over. You should do that. You should teach others, so you can come with me.”

  When she looks up at me, I see how red-rimmed her eyes are and it physically hurts me. “I don’t want to go. I don’t have that pioneer spirit a person needs to do well there. I think I’d go insane in a place like that. I’m not exactly spoiled rotten to the basic things like running water and electricity, but I am spoiled to things like technologies and access to information. And I do know that I’d be more help from here.”

  I know she’s right too. That’s what makes this so damn hard. She’s always on the internet, searching things. She has a mind that works almost constantly. And I know she will be more help here than there. We just have different paths and that’s hard to take.

  “Can we put this conversation to rest?” I ask her as I take her hand away from smoothing out her soaking wet skirt and hold it. “It really isn’t a thing we should be talking about just yet. We still have years to go. And who knows what will happen in that amount of time?”

  “Ryker, should we end this?” she asks as she looks at me with confusion riddling her pretty face.

  “You know it’s going to hurt me to leave you behind too,” I tell her as the driver takes us back home to Sebastien. I just recently talked her into moving in with me and letting the rental in Orlando go. She’s only been living with me for the last two weeks and now she wants to end it!

  “I know that. That’s why I think we both might be better off ending it now. Before we fall even more in love with each other.”

  “I don’t want that. Why should we hurt ourselves like that?” I ask her as I take her face in my hands.
“Anything can happen. Neither of us knows for certain what the future holds. I know this, though. I love you now and I always will. I don’t want to live my life without you, not ever. I’m positive about that, when the time comes, both of us will know without any uncertainty what the right thing to do will be. Please don’t talk about ending what we have, baby. That would kill me, I’m pretty sure.” I leave a kiss on her cheek and she finally smiles.

  “Me too,” she says then wraps her arms around me. “I know it is years away. I’m being foolish. I’ll stop. We have each other now. That’s what really matters.”

  “It is what matters.” My cell rings and we both look at it as I let her go to pull it out of my pocket. “Damien.”

  She sighs and goes to look out the window. “Tell him I said hello.”

  I chuckle at her sarcasm then answer his call. “I just heard the news,” he says before I can say a word.

  “That traveled fast,” I say in surprise.

  “I pay one of the reporters to send me information immediately. You will be sending a complete report to Markov Global, won’t you? It is part of our agreement.”

  “I will. It could take a week or more to get all the data but you’ll get your report,” I tell him.

  “I saw a picture of you and Gia during the press conference. She looked terrible. How’s she doing with this?” he asks and something inside of me spikes. I hate it when he asks about her!

  “She’ll be fine. It just brought things home to her,” I say as I reach out for her and pull her to my side again.

  “Being with you has done nothing more for her than when she was with me. She will lose you too. In the end,” he says and she overhears him as she’s so close to me and looks up at me.

  “He’s wrong. Being with you has made my life into something I didn’t know it could be. I’m thankful for you, Ryker. I’m thankful for every moment I get to have with you. And I’m sorry for saying anything stupid about ending it before we have to. I love you.” She kisses my cheek and I know things will work, somehow. They have to!

  “I’ll get that report to you as soon as I can, Damien,” I say then end the call, so I can pay attention to the most special person in the world to me. “I’m thankful for you too, baby.”

  Her hands flow over my shoulders to hold me tightly. “Ryker, tell me one thing.”

  “Anything,” I say as we look deep into each other’s eyes.

  “Tell me that you’ll never forget me and what we shared while we had the chance.”

  “How could I ever forget this?” I ask her then kiss the tip of her nose.

  “I can see it happening. I can see you getting to Mars and being excited about that. I can see you finding a woman to be with and making a family with, there. I can see time going on and you moving on. I can see it all and it’s like a burr underneath my skin. It pricks at me at times like these. I just need to believe that you will always keep me with you in your heart. And in the end, when we both leave our worlds, maybe we can meet in the place all souls go to when our lives are over.”

  Her words are making my heart ache. I can’t even think about making a family with anyone but her. Yet I know we’ll never have that. Not when I’m leaving. I’d never leave a family here. One of the reasons I find it so easy to say I’ll go to Mars is because I have no close family left in this world. But suddenly I’m seeing that I might.

  Gia is as close as any family I’ve ever had. Falling in love with her just may have been a terrible mistake, taking me away from what has been my goal since I found out it might be possible to go to Mars during my lifetime.

  “Gia, I don’t think it’s possible to forget a love this strong. And you’ve brought up some other things that don’t seem possible to me. Our relationship has spun things in a direction I didn’t see coming.”

  “I know that. I can see it in your eyes. You will have trouble leaving me,” she says then looks down. “Like I said, if you think we should end this…”

  I stop her with a kiss then end it and say, “I think we might think about ending what we currently have.”

  Her body sags as she leans against me. “I thought as much.”

  With a chuckle, I add, “Not in the way you’re thinking. In the way of making this more permanent. I want to start a training program for those going to Mars. Set up a desolate spot where we will have to learn how to adapt and live in an environment like the one on Mars. And you could be right there with me, learning how to acclimate yourself to it as well. I think if you knew more about what to expect, you’d find a sense of adventure and join me.”

  Her head shakes but I see a little light in her eyes as she makes the gesture. “That’s crazy.”

  “Is it?” I ask. “Or is it genius? I’m going with the latter. Come on, Gia! Think about it. We can set up something that will really be of help. And you’ve always said you want to help the people who go to Mars. Well, how can you really be all that much help if you lack the basic understanding of how life there will be? And your expertise in doing research will be invaluable to this project.”

  Her eyes dart back and forth as her mind is sparked about what I’m saying. “I think there definitely needs to be a training program.”

  “And I think you’d be perfect to help me and some others set it all up. And I think you just might find that you might like to go with me.” I hold her tight as I can see it there inside of her. She might find it not as bad as she thinks it will be.

  “Sandra and Tabitha would love to help,” she says. “We could effectively test the supplements too. Even on the animals! Ryker, now you do have me excited. I don’t think it will make me want to go to Mars but I am excited about working on this project and experiencing it all. I’m in, baby!”

  “Yes!” I say then kiss her again to seal our deal.

  I just might make a Martian out of this woman yet!

  Part 7 - The Liberation

  GIA

  Red-orange light filters into the dome, making a pretend Martian daytime for the test site. Ten acres have been stripped of anything but dirt. A dome made out of reddish polymers was constructed to cover the area. We arrived yesterday with nothing more than one backpack each, filled with essentials. And the other things that each pod can hold. Which isn’t a lot.

  I watch Ryker, as he’s in his element. Sheer joy is the expression on his handsome face. The men are overseeing the building of the tent system. It’s large and each couple or individual has separated, private rooms. A huge tent with a bunch of smaller tents inside of it, essentially.

  There are fifty people, all scientists or engineers, who signed up for the six-month test. I was a lead developer in the plans to make this test, we hope will be a success.

  Six of the women are in charge of digging the two latrines. Three more are putting up the mechanism, which one of Apollo Engineering’s top engineers came up with, to pull water out of the air. Now, we know the conditions won’t be exactly the same but the idea should work on Mars. Maybe the quantity of water might not be the same but there should be water, an essential part of life anywhere.

  I’m working in the group that’s making the garden. This will be our primary food supply. All of us went on vegan diets to ready our bodies for the change in the foods we eat. It was discussed at a world forum about how people should eat on Mars. The overwhelming decision was made that only plants such as herbs and spices, vegetables, and fruits are to be taken to the planet.

  No meat will be eaten there. The protein the body needs will be provided by spinach and beans. Until our garden grows, we only have supplements to live on and freeze dried meals that have been specially prepared with the vegan diet in mind.

  To be sure no one was sick or had any disease of any kind, everyone had to get a physical and undergo an extensive examination and testing. And, here’s the hard part, as there are no pharmacies on Mars and may never be, a new birth control concept had to be developed.

  Each female was given a device she must urinate on, daily
. It reads the hormone levels to determine if she’s in a fertile state or not. If she is, then she’s to refrain from sex, unless she and her partner want to have a child. There are three couples here who are pregnant right now. They’ll all be delivering within the six-month period, so we can see how all that goes.

  The first woman is due in three months, two of the people who signed up for this test have been trained in basic medical services and have delivered babies at the local hospital to gain some experience with that task.

  Cloth diapers and breastfeeding will have to be done by them all and all who go to Mars. Back to the old ways of doing things, a thing I’m not keen on but the pregnant couples are all looking forward to that, for some strange reason.

  My eyes wander around, looking at all the people, working busily to get things set up. Last night we all slept on the ground and that was not comfortable at all. Ryker cradled me in his arms the whole night, keeping me mostly off the ground. I think he’s trying to show me just how much he’ll take care of me if I’ll go with him.

  He gives me a smile and a wave as he catches me gazing at him. With no shirt on and the light glistening off his magnificent body, he’s something to look at. I blow him a kiss and he acts like he catches it, making me smile and my heart skip a beat. He’s just so damn cute!

  Settling into a squat, I get back to planting the seeds for the lettuce down one long row. One of the women who are in charge of the cooking calls out, “Breakfast!”

  Everyone stops what they’re doing and heads to the area where the make-shift dining area has been set up. Ryker meets me there and takes my hand, delivering a kiss to my cheek. “You look pretty today, Gia. I like what you’ve done with your hair.”

  I giggle at him and pat the bun on top of my head. Most of the women opted for the bun style. A few got theirs cut really short, which I thought was kind of dumb. As it grows out, it’ll look pretty bad.