Falling for Sarah

by Cate Beauman

  As Sarah stared at him with regret in her eyes, she’d hurt him in a way no one ever had. If he’d been even slightly prepared, he would have dealt with things differently—or at least he would’ve tried.

  He understood the guilt she felt. He’d had to contend with it himself over the last several months, but at the end of the day, he truly believed Jake would want Sarah happy.

  Sarah had grieved and struggled to keep going for much of the first year after Jake died. She’d found comfort and peace in Kylee, in her work, and her life had slowly smoothed out from there. It was okay for her to move on.

  Sarah could regret what happened between them all she wanted, but she hadn’t been able to deny that she’d been just as caught up in him as he’d been in her, especially when she’d been on the verge of surrendering again this morning. He’d seen the need in her eyes, had heard it in her strained voice.

  “Knock, knock.” Austin stuck his head in the office.

  Ethan turned. “Hey, man.”

  “I’m heading over to Sarah’s place. Here’s the report on the surveillance detail for the Williamson Case.” Austin put a thick stack of paper on Ethan’s desk.

  “Thanks. We’ll meet tomorrow, nine a.m., and go over everything. We also need to discuss next week’s premiere. With Hunter gone, we’ll both be putting in some overtime. I want an update on background checks on the staff at the Wyman. We’ll have to start staging routes for Tatiana Myers’ limo. They’re already buzzing about this being an Oscar-caliber performance, so it’s going to be a mess.”

  “Okay. See you at nine.” Austin started through the door.

  “You’re off the hook with Sarah until Tuesday night. She went to Utah.”

  Austin paused, stepped back in, made himself at home in a black leather chair. “She didn’t mention anything about it this morning.”

  “I got a call just before you came in.”

  “Is she okay?”

  Ethan’s head snapped up, his eyes meeting Austin’s. “Why?”

  “She was crying when I got to the door this morning.”

  His jaw clenched. “How was she when you left?”

  “Fine, I guess. She made me breakfast, saying she wanted to eat, but she played with the toast on her plate. We chatted a bit before she went to get Kylee. She said she was going to take Kylee to the beach for the afternoon.”

  Ethan nodded. “Go home and get some rest. You look like hell.”

  “I’m planning on it.”

  Austin left and Ethan sat down. He opened the report on his desk, trying to concentrate on his work, but stared at the print on paper. He hated when Sarah cried. He hated even more that he’d been the reason for her tears.

  Knowing there was nothing he could do to fix things for the time being, Ethan scrubbed his hands over his face, forced himself to focus on the words in front of him.

  Moments later, Nicolette stood in the doorway, trailing her exotic scent with her. “Darling.”

  Ethan automatically closed the classified report and leaned back in his chair. Apparently he wouldn’t be getting to Austin’s report anytime soon. “Nicky.”

  “You stood me up.” She pouted, playing with the silver necklace resting above lush, golden cleavage.

  “I told you it wasn’t a good time.”

  “I waited for you.”

  “You shouldn’t have.”

  She shut the door, turned the lock before walking to his desk. Her sleeveless red top and short black skirt fit like a second skin over her glorious body. She sat in his lap and made herself at home, playing with his tie. “I had plans for you last night, darling.” Her bright red fingernail traced his lips, and he couldn’t help but respond.

  “Very naughty plans.” She smiled wickedly. “Perhaps you will take me to dinner first, and we will go back to my hotel. Or I can show you right here.”

  She moved, straddling him, as she pulled his mouth to hers. Her body rocked, grinding against him. He felt nothing.

  What the hell’s wrong with me? He knew exactly, but tried to deny Sarah had a monopoly on his emotions.

  “We’re friends, Ethan. That’s all we’ll ever be.”

  When the hurt and helpless anger came back full throttle, Ethan deepened Nicolette’s kiss, grabbing her ass, clutching her more truly against him.

  She eased away. “We will play now, then.” Her fingers wandered to his belt.

  He wasn’t thinking straight and knew it. “Dinner first.” He stood, bringing her with him, dropped her to her feet.

  “A quick dinner.” She smiled, touching her tongue to her top lip.

  He ruthlessly shoved the soft lips and blue eyes of another from his mind. She didn’t want him. Trying to find his enthusiasm for Nicolette, he smiled back, pulled her against him. “Let’s try room service.”

  Zeke left the way he came in—through the open window at the back of the house. He chuckled as he checked his fly, adjusted himself, and tugged his black hood in place. He cut through several backyards, daring someone to spot him and call the cops.

  Fucking-A, that was too easy. The stupid bitch asked for it. An unlocked window was an open invitation as far as he was concerned. The lovely ladies of the Palisades needed to be more careful with a rapist on the loose. He covered his mouth, suppressing a snort of laughter as he circled back down a block to where he left his car.

  This one didn’t even bother to play hard to get, which had been a disappointment, but it wasn’t a complete waste. After all, part of the fun was getting into the house without waking them first. Most of the pleasure came from watching them open their eyes. The fear alone was enough to make him cum. He was getting hard again just thinking of it.

  And this one had been afraid, all right—fucking terrified. He’d watched her eyes blink open and grow huge when she saw him standing over her. Her gasp had been priceless.

  But then she just laid there—whimpering and crying like the big fucking pussy she was. She didn’t bother to try and fight, which pissed him off. Even when he raised the stakes by tying her up and telling her he was going to kill her, she still only lay there.

  He’d punched her and finished himself off with a little extra mean. She deserved it. She’d been desert dry. How could he practice with a dud like that?

  He worked hard to find her too. He’d gone to the gym for this one, sitting across the street at the bus stop for hours, waiting for just the right one to walk past the big windows of Robertson’s Racquetball and Fitness Club. When the blonde stepped on the elliptical and began to move, he knew she would be the one. She was pretty enough, but she was no Sarah Johnson.

  Zeke got in his car, drove past his latest bitch’s house, blew a kiss as he sneered. He made his way down three blocks to Sarah’s, took the blue rose from a container.

  He’d worked for years, hybridizing his roses, perfecting this very color. The soft blue, a shade hinting with touches of cornflower and periwinkle, matched Sarah’s eyes perfectly. He’d stared at the picture he found of her on Google Images and knew it was fate. She’d stood next to a dumbass movie star at some red carpet deal, but who cared about that?

  He eased up to the curb, just feet from the whore’s house he nailed the night before, got out. The upscale neighborhood was dark and quiet, but he pulled the black hood over his hair, just in case.

  Zeke walked to Sarah’s front yard, looking behind him once, before he made his way to her door. He kissed the delicate flower petals with relish, laid the blossom against wood. “For you, my beautiful Sarah.” He stared at the house for several seconds, fantasizing about how he would enter it when he was ready. Then he strolled back to his car and drove off.

  Ethan pulled into Sarah’s drive, shut off the engine. The light she left on in the entryway cast shadows around the front. He stared at the darkened living room window, wondered why he came.

  Ethan rubbed his fingers over his forehead, blowing out a long breath. Because he couldn’t stop thinking about her.

  During dinner
with Nicolette, he’d been consumed by Sarah, by moments they’d shared over the past six years—their hug before she walked down the aisle to Jake; laughing together while they strolled along the beach; Sarah running into his office, throwing herself into his arms, glowing with the news of her pregnancy; him resting a cool cloth on her neck while she sat pale and sick in her bathroom during the rough first trimester; her eyes full of shocked wonder when she took his hand, holding his palm against her belly as the life inside her womb kicked for the first time.

  Their lives were so wrapped up in each other’s. How were they going to get things back to the way they were? What if they couldn’t? His stomach jittered with the thought.

  While he toyed with the two-potato crusted salmon on his plate, Nicolette had gone on about her newest fragrance campaign. He’d lost the thread of their conversation as he remembered pressing his mouth to Sarah’s, the yield of her soft lips against his, and her apology for their mistake. Hurt bubbled to the surface, colliding with frustrated anger, and he’d become determined to show himself that he didn’t need Sarah, that it didn’t matter.

  He’d shoved his chair back from their small table overlooking the city, interrupting Nicolette midsentence. He’d scooped her up and kissed her the way he wished he were kissing Sarah. As he tried harder to push thoughts of Sarah from his mind, he fell to the bed with Nicky. He yanked her shirt over her head, buried his face against her neck and remembered the way Sarah’s eyes had stared into his the moment before he’d changed everything. He pulled away from Nicolette, stood, told her it was over. She’d given him a slap for his trouble, which still stung.

  Running his tongue around the inside of his cheek, Ethan started his vehicle. There was no use being here tonight. He shifted into reverse, glanced at the house as he eased out of the drive. The flower lying in the shadows caught his eye and he stopped, shifted the Rover back into first, parked again.

  Brows furrowed as he stepped from the vehicle. Ethan scanned the yard as he walked to the entryway and stood in the dim light. He stared at the blue rose resting against the door. He looked around, searching for a note, but couldn’t find one. Odd.

  He leaned forward to pick up the rose but stopped mid-reach. Although it was just a flower, he didn’t like it. He crouched down, examining. The petals appeared fresh. Who brought a flower to a woman’s home after dark? No, he definitely didn’t like it—unless someone made a mistake and left it at the wrong door.

  Ethan walked to the Rover, grabbed a napkin from a fast food bag. He went back to Sarah’s door, picked the rose up by the stem. He scrutinized the bud, turning it from side to side. The thorns had been removed, leaving the shoot smooth. It would’ve taken time to do that. If someone put in the effort to dethorn a rose, they would want the flower seen by the right person. Even if they’d gone to a florist, they still wouldn’t want to waste a flower at the wrong address. This had been deliberately placed here.

  With nowhere to put the flower, he dumped the rest of the contents from the fast food bag on the seat and set the stem inside.

  On alert, Ethan took his gun from the lockbox under his seat and walked the perimeter of Sarah’s house. Everything looked the way it should. He got in his vehicle, put the pistol away, stared at the spot where the rose had been before he drove off.

  When he made it to the stop sign at the end of Sarah’s quiet street, several emergency vehicles flew past. What the hell is going on around here? He turned right, away from the chaos, toward home.

  CHAPTER 7

  SARAH HELD BABY RYAN IN her arms after the photo shoot. “He’s perfect, Tatiana, just perfect.” She moved her cheek over his soft newborn forehead and smiled.

  “I know. I’m in love.”

  Sarah sat next to the redheaded beauty on the deep green couch they’d used for the photos. “Treasure this time; it goes so fast.”

  Tatiana smiled, playing with the pleats in her flowing white night dress. “You can count on it. After the premiere next week, Kevin and I plan to bring Ryan back here for the next several months. I’m finished with movies until next fall.”

  “America will be waiting for you, whenever you decide you’re ready to return.” She handed Ryan to Tatiana, recognizing the eager look in the new mother’s eyes.

  Ryan began to fuss and root. Tatiana settled him at her breast. “You’re planning on coming next week, right? I would love to have you there. I’ve put you on the security clearance list for the after-event.”

  “Sounds fun.” It sounded like a nightmare. Premieres were always such a hassle. The screaming fans alone overwhelmed, even if they weren’t screaming for her. The press and security were so tight. It suffocated.

  The majority of her clients were Hollywood A-listers. As a result, premieres and red carpet events were part of the job description. She loathed that aspect of her career. Being home with Kylee would always beat the circus of Tinsel Town.

  Tatiana laughed. “You’re a terrible liar, Sarah.”

  Sarah smiled. “I’ll be there.” She glanced at her watch. “I really have to get back to the hotel. The limo will be by to pick us up in a couple of hours.”

  Tatiana stood as Sarah did. “Make sure you bring Kylee next time.”

  “She and Hailey are playing at the indoor water park. It’s quite impressive. I won’t be shocked if I have to go down and drag her up to our room myself.” She hugged Tatiana. “Enjoy your precious boy.” She stroked a finger over Ryan’s cheek.

  “I certainly will. I’ll see you next week.”

  Sarah grimaced

  Tatiana laughed. “If I have to suffer, so do you.”

  In the week since the photo shoot, Celebrity Magazine flew off the shelves faster than it could be printed. Sarah’s usually hectic schedule turned chaotic shortly thereafter. She juggled her time between shoots, proofing, and Kylee, which left barely a moment for anything else. It was only when she lay in bed, before exhaustion took her under, that she thought of Ethan. He’d never called her back. She hadn’t seen him since the morning of their argument.

  Sarah stood in front of her bathroom mirror, securing the last pin into the shiny, loose curls piled on her head. Wispy trendles, pulled at random, framed her face.

  “Sarah, you look amazing,” Hailey said as she bent forward, applying clear gloss to Kylee’s puckered lips.

  Sarah met Hailey’s gaze in the mirror and smiled. “Thanks.” She turned from side to side, examining the full effect of her hair and makeup. “I’m ready for my dress. Will you help me so I don’t mess up my curls?”

  “Of course.” Hailey plucked Kylee from the bathroom counter and set her on her feet.

  Sarah took the black spaghetti strap evening dress from the bag. She pulled it over her head with Hailey’s help. As she smoothed the fitted satin against her waist, both Kylee and Hailey stared in silence.

  She stood before the three-way, full-length mirror, turning. “Do you think it’s too much? My entire back is exposed.”

  “Mama, you so pretty.”

  She brushed a hand over Kylee’s pigtail. “Thank you, honey.”

  “Seriously, Sarah, Tatiana Myers has nothing on you tonight. You’re stunning.” Hailey fixed a wisp of Sarah’s hair as she spoke.

  “That’s very kind of you. Hopefully people will ask where I got this dress so I can plug my mother’s shop. I have to go.” She walked over to her jewelry box, selected the square-cut diamond earrings her parents gave her for Christmas. After fastening them in place, she misted perfume into the air, stepped into it.

  “Me too, Mama.”

  “Okay, but close your eyes and hold your breath.” Sarah sprayed the wildflower scent again.

  Kylee walked into the mist, giggling.

  Sarah knelt down to Kylee’s level and nuzzled her neck, making Kylee laugh. “You smell beautiful. You be a good girl for Hailey tonight.” She kissed Kylee’s slippery lips and stood, looking at Hailey. “I’ll be back as soon as humanly possible, I promise. Arm the system when I le
ave and don’t open the door for anyone. Austin’s working the premiere tonight but another one of Ethan’s men, Jackson, will be in the area. He’ll be doing drive-bys every twenty minutes or so. If you even think you need him, hit the panic button on the panel and call the police.”

  “You’re freaking me out, Sarah.”

  Sarah touched Hailey’s arm. “I’m sorry. The crime going on around here is pretty scary. The last ra—” She stopped herself, glancing at Kylee. “The last couple of incidents happened three blocks away. That’s worth freaking out about. Do you want me to call my mother? You can take the car and go to Malibu. Dad is doing rounds at the hospital tonight. You know my mom would love to have you both.”

  “No, we’ll be fine.”

  Sarah hugged Hailey. “You know where the keys are if you change your mind. See you in a bit. I think the limo’s here.”

  Sarah stepped from the limo into pandemonium. Fans screamed as camera bulbs flashed continuously, blinding. Looking down, she walked ahead, following the high heeled feet in front of her. Someone called her name, and she glanced up into flashbulbs. She scanned the frenzied crowd as someone shouted to her again. Her gaze landed on Tatiana, waving, as she stood in front of a massive banner showcasing the title of her new movie, Final Hour.

  Sarah waved back and made her way through the chaos. When she finally reached the redheaded stunner, she was enveloped in a hug. She returned the embrace and smiled—until she looked over Tatiana’s shoulder. Ethan, handsome in his tuxedo, stood to the side. He was all business as he spoke into his earpiece. Although he wore sunglasses, she knew he focused on her.

  Tatiana eased back. “You look beautiful, Sarah.”

  Sarah tore her gaze from Ethan, struggling to keep up with the conversation as her heart pounded. “Thank you. So do you.” She focused on Tatiana’s form-fitted gown. The forest green accentuated her shiny mane of hair. “It’s hard to believe you gave birth last week.”