“He loves to sing this song for you,” Jase grins, running the tip of his finger over my palm.
“Yeah, it makes me feel warm even though I’m yet to understand what it means.”
“One day you will.”
I smile and watch as Whiskey continues singing, his voice fills the room and travels into my soul like a raging fire. I can’t push him out, even in all his darkness, because he makes my life lighter somehow. Jase wraps an arm around me and leads me to the bar, forcing me to turn my eyes away from Whiskey. When we get to the bar, Jase and I order another beer and make our way to a nearby table. We both sit down and continue listening to Whiskey’s haunting voice.
“Oh hey Jase, that girl over there is totally checking you out,” I grin, noticing a girl nearby smiling over at Jase. She’s pretty, with dark black hair and light blue eyes. Most men wouldn’t think twice about chatting her up if they caught her looking at them the way she’s looking at Jase right now.
He turns, looks at her and then turns back to me with a grin. “Nah, I’m cool tonight.”
“She doesn’t think so,” I tease, wiggling my eyebrows at him.
“Well, best we make her think so.”
Jase grips my face and pulls me closer, brushing his lips across mine. The kiss is in no way passionate, in fact, I kiss him more passionately when we’re just chilling out together. To her though, it’s enough. When we look back, she’s pouting and staring at another group of males in the corner. I giggle, my two boys gather attention no matter where they go, there’s just something so luring about the Levanox brothers. Poor girl is probably so horribly disappointed.
“She’s on the prowl,” Jase laughs.
“And you missed out, you could have gotten lucky, Jase.”
He laughs and wraps an arm around me. “I am lucky, I have the only girl I want right beside me. I couldn’t get luckier.”
I giggle and kiss his cheek. “You sweet talker, Jase Levanox!”
He chuckles. “I am good, right?”
“Oh yeah, you sure are.”
“Do you reckon Whiskey is next on her list?”
I turn and stare at the girl, who now has a group of friends with her. They’re all staring up at Whiskey with dreamy smiles. When he winks at them, they break out into a fit of giggles. Turning away to hide the jealousy on my face, I smile at Jase.
“Probably.”
Jase’s eyes scan my face. “That bothers you?”
“No, of course not.”
He smiles and flicks the tip of my nose. “You’re a bad liar, Nevaeh.”
I roll my eyes and pick up my drink. “Come on handsome, let’s dance.”
I am jerked out of my dream when the phone beside me rings. Blinking out of my sleep filled haze, I stare down at the screen. Unknown number. I pick it up and answer it with a sleepy, groggy, hello.
“Is this the girl looking for Whiskey?”
I sit up as the gravelly male voice travels across the phone.
“Um, yes, I am.”
“I won’t say this twice, so listen very carefully. You will stop looking for him. If you value your life and your safety, you will drop this right now and move on.”
Why does everyone keep saying that? And how dare he ring and threaten me when he doesn’t even know me.
“I’m sorry who is this?”
“It doesn’t matter, don’t keep looking for him, you’ll end up tangled in something you don’t want.”
“Well, I need him so I can’t stop looking.”
“Are you stupid or just simple? I am not joking around with you girl. Stop looking. He’s none of your concern anymore.”
“His brother is sick,” I snap.
“That’s too bad.”
Then he hangs up. Well great. That’s helpful. What is with these people? Honestly, can’t they just give me a straight answer? Better yet, why can’t they just tell me where Whiskey is and let me deal with him on my own. No, not them though, they are all doom and gloom ‘if you keep calling you’ll die’ kind of thing. I’m over it. This task of finding Whiskey is going to be far harder than I first thought. He’s obviously not wanting to be found and has his little back up guards on the hunt for anyone who tries to find him. Jesus Whiskey, you couldn’t just make this easy could you?
I rub the sleep from my eyes and stare at the clock. It’s five am. Well, I do have to start work at six thirty so I guess I didn’t lose too much sleep. I crawl out of bed and plod into the shower. The warm water is enough to wake me from my sleepy haze. I dress in my uniform, make myself a coffee and then head into work. I don’t mind morning shifts, I prefer them. I’m not a great night shift person. In fact, I’m just good at night ever. What can I say? I like my sleep.
When I get in, the hospital is buzzing, as always. It never sleeps, quietens down or stops. It’s always busy, there’s always someone needing help or care. I make my way up to my station and see Tanya right away. She’s at the nurses’ station, chatting to a fellow nurse. When she sees me, she smiles. I have no doubt she’s smiling because I went home instead of staying with Jase. I stare down the hall at his room and Tanya clicks her fingers in front of my face.
“He’s been moved to oncology now.”
I focus my attention on her. “What?”
“Yeah, he was only in our ward because of the bed shortage. He’s finally gotten himself a new room up there.”
I force a smile, I am grateful Jase has himself a good room but I don’t like that he’s not close. I can’t just check on him now. I pull my charts from the bench and sigh.
“Oh well, what have we got going on here today?”
“Nothing new, the patients are all the same.”
I like easy days. Mind you, easy days can change in a split second in a place like this. I flick through the charts and scan what’s been done during the night, then I get onto my rounds. The morning flies by fairly fast and by ten, I’m ready for my break. I grab a coffee and head up to oncology. When I get in, I walk over to the nurses’ station.
“Hey Nevaeh,” Jane, the head nurse, smiles.
“Hey Jane, I’m looking for Jase Levanox?”
“Ah, yes, he’s in room fourteen.”
I flash her a smile and walk down the hall until I find the door with the golden 14 on it. I open the door softly and I see Jase sitting by the window, just staring out at it. I can’t help the sting of pain that pinches in my chest, but I squelch it and whisper, “Hey handsome.”
He turns and his smile lightens my day. I walk over and stop next to him. I take him in, scanning my eyes over his body for any changes, anything that might be different since last time, but he looks ok. Well, as ok as someone so sick can look. He’s still drawn out and tired looking, his body is hunched and his skin is cool and clammy. He’s still so beautiful to me though, he always will be.
“Nev, god, I missed you. When I woke, you were gone.”
I smile. “They sent me home, you know, so I didn’t become a crazy stalker.”
He laughs hoarsely and pulls me down onto his lap. “I’ve been moved away from you, so now I can’t hear your laugh in the halls.”
I smile and snuggle into him. “I’ll text you my laugh.”
He chuckles, then coughs. “And how will you do that?”
“I don’t know, I’ll record it and send it to you.”
He snuggles further into me. “Hmmm, ok, that sounds good.”
“Have you eaten today?”
“No nurse.”
I lean back and frown at him. “Nothing at all?”
“It doesn’t stay down.”
“Haven’t they given you meds for that?”
He grins. “Yes nurse, but I’m not quite up to eating.”
“Water?”
“Plenty.”
I nod and slide off his lap. “So, I’m going shopping this afternoon. I’m going to get you whatever you want, so you better give me a list.”
His eyes sparkle for the first time since I’ve seen
him and he stands. “Oh you know, ice cream would be good. What were those ones you liked so much?”
I giggle. “That’s not funny.”
“If I recall, we had a lot of fun with those.”
“You can’t eat ice cream,” I smirk. “So there!”
He waggles his eyebrows. “But you can.”
“Oh, no, I’m never trusting you or Whiskey with ice cream again.”
“Remember how hard we got you, god, that was so funny. You were covered from head to toe in ice cream.”
I smile at the fond memory.
“Run Heaven, we’re gonna make this worth the chase!” Whiskey calls, waving his ice cream at me.
I squeal and turn, running out of the room only to slam into Jase. He grips me, wrapping his arms around my body and ramming his ice cream right into my face. The cold frozen treat being smothered all over my face makes me squeal. I squirm but I’m not strong enough. Whiskey catches up to me in a second and he drives his ice cream into my face too. With a gag and a laugh, I reach up and grip a large blob from my cheek and smudge it all over Whiskey’s lips.
“Oh, you’re going to pay for that!” he chuckles.
“Oh yeah?” I pant. “Bring it.”
Jase lets me go and I spin around, leaping on him and rubbing my face over his. He roars with laughter and puts his hand directly over my face, pushing me back. Whiskey appears from behind me and wraps his hands around my face and smudges the ice cream all over my cheeks and runs it down my neck.
“I hate you two!” I cry, giggling so hard I’m letting off crazy little snorts here and there.
“But we love you!” Jase laughs.
“Even when you snort like a cute little piggy,” Whiskey grins, then he leans down and snorts in my face. I shove him and we all burst out laughing.
“God,” I smile, helping Jase to his bed. “That was hilarious, I was sticky for like a damn week after that.”
Jase laughs softly. “Yeah, I bet you were.”
“So, ice cream is out, what can I get you?”
He shrugs. “You’re enough.”
“Aw, come on tough guy. There’s got to be something you want?”
His smile becomes pained. “I want my brother.”
I lose my smile and grip his hand. “I’m going to find him Jase, I promise you.”
“What if it’s too late Nev? What if I don’t get to say goodbye?”
“I won’t let that happen, I’ll find him. I swear to you Jase, I will do whatever it takes.”
He nods, looking away. I grip his face in my hands and turn him back to look at me. I let my eyes bore into his so he can see that I am serious. I won’t let him down.
“I promise you, Jase, do you hear me?”
He smiles and his brown eyes scan my face.
“I hear you girl.”
I grin and lean over to kiss his cheek, but he moves his head so our lips brush softly. Giving him a grin, I bite his bottom lip and he chuckles.
“You were always the cheeky one.”
He shrugs looking innocent. “A man knows when he needs a kiss.”
“You need a kiss, you ask Jase.”
He raises his brow and smiles at me. “So there’s not a boyfriend for me to battle with?”
“No,” I murmur, pressing my lips against his cheek.
“No? I find that hard to believe, you grew into a real gorgeous girl Nevaeh.”
“You have to say that, you’re my friend.”
“You know I mean it. I’ve never looked at another girl the way I look at you. You know I’ve always loved you.”
I stiffen, but force myself to keep calm. Don’t feel guilt now Nevaeh, he needs you.
“So, when was the last boyfriend?” Jase asks, not letting this one go.
“I…well…I haven’t…had one.”
He pulls back and his eyes meet mine. I can see the question in his brown depths.
“You haven’t had one?”
“No.”
“Why?”
“It’s a long story and…”
“Because of Whiskey or because we left?”
“It doesn’t matter, I am just…”
“Have you been with another man at all, Nev?”
His voice is soft, gentle and encouraging. I don’t want to answer him, but I don’t exactly want to tell him a lie either. I just don’t know how to explain myself. I know he’ll want to know why as soon as I tell him I haven’t been with anyone, and that means opening up old wounds I don’t know if I’m ready to share but…I’m not going to lie to Jase, so I give him as simple an answer as I can. “No.”
I hear his sharp intake of breath, I stare down at my fingers which are rapidly fumbling together. Jase takes my face, forcing me to look over at him.
“Why Nev?”
“It really doesn’t matter, I have to get back to work.”
I jump from the bed, making sure my clothes aren’t crumpled before hurrying towards the door.
“Nev!”
“I’ll come see you later Jase, love you,” I call out.
I rush out before he can say another word. When I get to the elevator, I punch the button over and over, desperate for it to open.
“It doesn’t matter how many times you hit the button, it won’t hurry it up,” an older man grumbles, coming up to stand beside me.
“Right, sorry.”
I wait for the door to open, then I leap in. When the doors close I exhale loudly and let my back slump against the cool steel. The older man stares at me for a moment, then turns to wait for the elevator to move. When we stop at my floor, I hurry out. Thank god. I couldn’t bear to answer Jase’s questions right now. I know for a fact he won’t like the answer. He doesn’t need anymore pain. He doesn’t need to know my reasons for not being with another man since Whiskey.
“Hey, there you are.”
I turn to face Tanya, she’s smiling and coming towards me with an arm full of charts.
“I was on break.”
“Yeah, I know. How’s Jase?”
“He’s good.”
“Awesome, hey Mrs Simpson in bed four is complaining about the drip irritating her hand.”
“All right, I’m onto it.”
“Sweet, hey, you wanna catch up tomorrow night?”
I smile. “Yeah, I could use a break.”
“Sweet, we’ll grab a few drinks after work.”
“Sounds great.”
“Well, I better get back to it.”
With a sigh, I do the same.
~*~*~*~*~
I head to the store after work to get some things for Jase. I pick up a few books, some magazines, a portable DVD player and some movies, plus a few games we can play together. I head home and decide to get changed and eat before I go back to see him. I know he wants to see me, he’s been texting me all afternoon wondering why I ran out. I know he’ll want answers, I just don’t know if I’m ready to give them. They won’t change anything, they’ll only open old wounds.
Once I’m showered, changed and my hair is tied up in a loose ponytail, I sit down to a bowl of leftover Chinese food and fire up my laptop. I log onto Facebook and see there are no new messages, feeling my stomach sink, I open the email. The first few messages to come through are a load of crap, junk email, things like that. Then I see one ping up from an unknown user, with the subject “What do you want with Whiskey?” Feeling my stomach clench, I open it and read the message.
I won’t warn you again, back off. This is the last chance. Stop looking for Whiskey.
Whoever and whatever is protecting Whiskey really doesn’t want him found. I contemplate not replying, but I promised Jase I’d do everything I could, so I reply.
I’m not backing off, I need to see him. His brother needs him. Stop threatening me and pass on my message to him, please.
I shut down the email and turn off the laptop, then I gather the bag of goodies for Jase and head out, making my way back to the hospital. Honestly, it feels like I can
never get away from that place sometimes, but there’s nowhere else I could be right now that I would be comfortable. Jase needs me. I won’t let him down. Not now. It seems to me I’m the only one he has right now. I wonder about his parents, and why they aren’t here supporting their son. He is the golden child in their eyes, after all.
They always favoured Jase, giving him everything he wanted and leaving Whiskey out. I’m not really sure why, I know Whiskey was a handful as a child and a teen, but he loved his parents just as much as Jase. Katie, Jase’s mother, couldn’t deal with Whiskey and their father John was always spending his time yelling at him for not being the perfect son, or getting good grades, or being sensible like Jase. It must have been hard for Whiskey, living under his brother’s shadow. Maybe that’s why he disappeared? Who knows, part of me wonders if I’ll ever find out why he really disappeared.
Probably not.
Chapter 4
When I get into Jase’s room, he’s sitting by the window again. He seems to enjoy that spot. He’s hooked up to a drip again, so my guess is he had more chemo this afternoon. When he turns to look at me, and I see how pale his face is, I know I’m right. I drop the bag of things and rush over, touching the back of my hand to his clammy forehead. He feels warm, and he looks so pale it’s frightening. He shouldn’t be out of that bed. Where’s the damn nurses?
“Honey, you should be in bed,” I whisper, taking his hand.
“I’m always in bed,” he croaks.
“I know, but it’s where you need to be.”
“My last moments of life will be spent in a damn bed,” he barks, causing himself to have another coughing fit. I rub his back furiously, trying to ease the pain I have no doubt he’s feeling.
“That’s not true, ok?” I whisper.
He looks up at me, his eyes are bloodshot and parts of his beautiful thick lashes are falling out. My heart breaks in half, it literally just snaps in two. Seeing him like this is testing every bit of strength I have inside. I don’t like seeing him fading away. It’s not fair. It’s just so completely wrong to see someone you love in this situation, knowing there’s nothing you can do to stop it.
Three Hearts One Soul (The Soul Series #1) Page 4