Living A Beautiful War

by Debra Kayn

  She sat up on the bed and peered down at the tattoo. Her pulse drummed hard inside her chest and she pressed her hand to her stomach to see the design better.

  A red heart covered in black scrolling tattoos like the ones on Ink's body marked her skin. Instead of feathered wings that stretched out on both sides the way she imagined he'd do, Ink had wrapped the white feathered wings around the heart in a protective show of ownership. The tattoo was more than she'd expected and the meaning was clear.

  Ink gave her his heart, his scarred soul, and she was the wings— his protector. It was the biggest gift anyone had ever given her.

  Chapter Twenty Five

  The U-Haul truck Lilly's parents sent to Federal pulled into the alley behind the Sterling Building. Lilly waved and hurried around the vehicle when it came to a stop. She couldn't believe how fast her parents worked to send her belongings. They'd only been home for a week, and her parents were busy people.

  Torque, one of her dad's oldest friends, lumbered out of the driver's seat, stretched his back, and then lifted his old lady, Brandy, to the ground. Lilly threw herself at Torque the moment he turned, hugging his solid body tightly. She closed her eyes as his huge hand cupped the back of her head and inhaled the rugged, leather scent coming off him.

  She leaned back, opening her eyes, without letting Torque go. "Did you hear the news? Ink and I are together."

  Torque chuckled. "That's why we're here. Your dad's back in Cactus Cove still grumbling about his little girl growing up. I'm happy for you, sweetheart. Where's Ink?"

  Her excitement over seeing him waned at having to answer questions about Ink. Every time she'd tried to talk to Ink about what had happened when she got her tattoo, he kissed her and walked away, making the excuse that he was busy, and if they planned to sleep in town tonight, he had to work. It wasn't lost on her that he'd made excuses for any sort of meaningful conversations since the night of their date.

  That didn't stop Ink from having sex with her though. As she was finding out, he could have sex to get out of talking with her. His excuses were starting to piss her off, and she hated how she fell for his excuses, again and again.

  "He's inside. We're trying to move in today, improve the downstairs for the Silver Girls, and get our new tenant situated all in a couple of days before we open for Friday night's show." She turned to Torque's wife Brandy and hugged her. "You look beautiful. How are you?"

  "Wonderful." Brandy kissed Lilly's cheek. "Congratulations. We're all so happy for you, and everyone says to tell you hi and they miss you."

  "I miss everyone too." Lilly wrinkled her nose. "Now, I just have to wait patiently until dad comes to his senses and realizes I'm happy too."

  "He loves you," Brandy said, rubbing her thumb on Lilly's cheek. "I've got lipstick on you, honey."

  "I come clean when I wash." Lilly laughed. "Let me go inside and get some of the guys to bring my things upstairs. I can't believe Dad sent such a big truck. I only had six or seven boxes."

  "Rain sent a few more things along with us as a gift." Torque lifted his chin. "I'll get the guys. We're going to need everyone's help"

  "I wonder what Dad sent?" Lilly asked Brandy.

  Brandy's gaze followed Torque as he walked to the door. "Club business. I wasn't told a thing and didn't ask."

  Ten minutes later, every Bantorus member present gathered around the back of the truck. Ink walked out and joined Lilly, looping his arm across her shoulders. She laid her hand on his stomach and received a squeeze back from Ink. Excitement filled her. It was good to have family around to share this part of their life together, and maybe having everyone near would help Ink realize everything happened for a reason.

  "All right, let's get everything inside." Ink motioned to the truck. "Open the door."

  Big Dawg hit the switch, riding the ramp up to the rear door on the truck, and made quick work with the lock. The door opened, and Lilly stared inside the packed cargo container.

  Every space was taken up with a box or crate. She ogled the delivery. Her dad couldn't have fit one more box in there.

  "I don't know what all of this is. I swear, I only asked him to send my boxes of clothes and knickknacks that I've kept over the years," she said. "Where are we going to put all this?"

  Ink kissed her softly. "Your parents love you. They want you to be happy, and so do I."

  "What are you saying?"

  He grinned, and for the first time in the last few days, he visibly relaxed. "You, woman, just got everything you needed to open the business to five days a week and take it to the next level."

  "What?" She thrust her fingers into her hair. "Are you kidding me?"

  "Nope." He kissed her forehead. "I've been on the phone with your dad, and even your mom, since they left Federal. I told them what we needed, got their opinion, and then your dad made it happen."

  "I didn't know," she whispered, shocked that all that was going on behind her back.

  Ink laughed. "That was the point. I wanted to surprise you. We're making our home here, and that means you needed stuff for the suite and for downstairs to run a classy business."

  He let go of her and reached behind him, extracting a piece of paper from his pocket. "Here's your liquor license. I've talked it over with Kurt, and I'm stepping back from the guns. The club will still need me during the summer when the orders get bigger for the militia, but I'm going to help you here. It's ours, Ace. Let's do it big."

  "I can't believe this." She covered her mouth in shock. "This is wild. I can't believe this is all happening."

  "Believe it, Ace," he said.

  Ink moved away from her and jumped up in the truck to help Big Dawg carry the supplies to the men waiting to haul everything inside. She hugged her waist, overcome with the news and how big her business could grow. Ink had made the impossible happen.

  "Beckett, take this out front and unpack it." Ink set a crate on the ramp.

  She peered inside. It was a metal bench with Silver Girls inscribed on the back. She looked up at Ink, he winked, and she climbed up on top of the ramp and kissed him.

  Caught between wanting to show her thankfulness and her desire to tear into the crates to see what else he bought, all her excitement came out in the kiss. He opened his mouth, and she thoroughly tasted him. The positive direction pushed aside her worry over Ink's habit of avoiding what was going on between them. They were going to be okay.

  The Bantorus members whooped and cheered. She pulled back laughing, and kissed Ink fast before she scooted out of the way.

  A half hour later, the bikers had removed everything but one crate that remained in the truck. Overwhelmed, she leaned into Ink's side and wrapped her arms around his waist.

  "Thank you," she said. "This is unreal."

  Ink guided her farther into the truck. "There's one more thing. Remember when you asked me what I was doing a few weeks back when you caught me outside the Sterling Building writing stuff down?"

  "Yeah." She nodded. "But that was before my parents came to Federal and you claimed me."

  He took the crowbar and pried at the nails in the wooden crate. "I've always wanted you, Ace. I asked you to wait, and you did. That doesn't mean I wasn't making plans."

  He tossed the crowbar into the corner and used his boot to kick off the side of the crate. She jumped back out of the way and watched him rip the wood away.

  "A new sign." He moved out of the way. "The old one burnt with the building, and Kurt never replaced it."

  The large red and black sign read Silver Girls in silver. Underneath the name of the business it read, 'Presented by Lilly' in scrolled red lettering. She clasped her hands under her chin and grinned.

  "Well?" he asked.

  She walked over to him and hooked her hands behind his neck, dragging him down for a kiss. "I love it. Thank you."

  He grunted, but he grinned back at her. "You better get inside and make sure everyone is putting everything where you want it. I've got a sign to hang."

&
nbsp; With one last promise to show him how much she appreciated everything later when they were alone, she left the truck and Ink.

  Total chaos greeted her inside the Sterling Building. Men rushed around carrying supplies, arguing over how to hang the new blood red velvet curtains, and grumbling about doing women's work and wanting to take a quick ride to escape the chores. She stood in the middle of the room. Her face hurt from her constant smile, and she wanted to cry over all the surprises. Every single one of them came to town because of her and Ink. They were family, and it wouldn't be the same without them bickering and working hard.

  Because of everyone's generosity and help, Silver Girls would become a mecca for everyone stopping in the little historical town of Federal. She swiped her forehead, trying to grasp the enormity of it all. With the new liquor license, her ideas flowed into bigger and better things for Bantorus MC.

  The Federal Charter had a clubhouse, but now they had somewhere to hang with the community, and show their support to Federal. Her dad had the right idea of belonging in the real world while retaining the structure of a club. She'd watched him growing up turn Pitnam into a town owned by Bantorus MC. She wanted the same thing in Federal, and now it was possible.

  "Lilly!" Katie grabbed Lilly's hand and jumped beside her before giving her a quick hug. "Look at all this stuff."

  "I know," she said, wiping her cheek. "It's amazing."

  "Everything is perfect, and my room...God, my room is fabulous." Katie's hand fluttered in the air. "It already feels like home."

  "Good." She scooted both of them out of the direct path of traffic. "Ink and I will be staying here tonight. You're probably going to have to put up with some pounding and noise. I want everything done by Friday night before the show starts. Let the other Moroad women know that I want them here an hour early. I have good news to share with you all."

  "I'll do that right now." Katie hurried off.

  Lilly wandered over to the windows. She ran her hand down the soft velvet length of the newly hung curtain. While discussing her plans for Silver Girls with her parents and Ink, she'd mentioned keeping with the style of the historical town buildings and explained how the original Sterling Building was a former bordello. She couldn't believe that they listened to every small detail she told them.

  The customers were going to freak when they came for the show. They'd treat the dancers like royalty, and the girls deserved so much more. Money would roll in and her customers would experience adult entertainment at its finest. Pure class, all the way.

  Outside the window, Ink climbed down the ladder. Lilly stepped over a broken box to get closer to knock on the window and wave at him, but he paid her no attention. His focus was on Torque and going by Ink's stiff posture and the firm expression on Torque's face, something was going on. She walked around more boxes and stood in the opened doorway, out of sight but within hearing distance.

  "It's been years ago, Ink. I don't remember the details," Torque said.

  Ink crossed his arms. "But Lilly overheard."

  Torque's brows lowered. Lilly reached out and steadied herself against the doorframe at the mention of her name and the anger in Ink's voice.

  "You and Rain put that shit in a little girl's head and she's carried that with her ever since," Ink said.

  "We thought it was a private conversation," Torque said. "We'd never talk around Lilly. You know that."

  "What gives you the right to talk about my life with someone else?" Ink's arms came out to his sides. "You assumed you knew what I'd lived through. You don't know jack shit, and because you and Rain thought you could make it all disappear by giving me some ink and a tattoo machine, you're crazy. Now, I have to go through knowing every time Lilly looks at me, she's blinded by what I've done to myself. You've killed—"

  "No, Ink." Lilly walked out and joined the two men on the sidewalk. "You're wrong."

  "Go inside," Ink said.

  She remained beside him and looked at Torque for support. The older biker's gaze softened and she knew he wasn't about to step in between them. MC brothers always supported one another and had each other's backs, but they never stepped between a man and his woman.

  "I'll be inside if you need me." Torque squeezed her hand as he passed.

  She stared at the sidewalk. The last several days, she thought Ink was reluctant to admit he enjoyed tattoos. She'd been wrong. So, so, very wrong.

  "I told you that I don't even see your tattoos. I see you." She raised her gaze. "I've given you time to get over being pissed that I overheard something you obviously didn't want shared, but I'm your woman. We've always sworn to be honest with each other. How many times have you held me in the past and swore to me that it was us against the world?"

  "Go back inside, Ace." He clenched his teeth and the muscle in his jaw twitched.

  "Don't push me away." She stood in front of him. "Tell me why you hate the fact that I know the reason why you enjoy—"

  "This is bull shit." He shook his head. "I'm going for a ride."

  "You're leaving me?"

  "A ride, Ace." He turned and walked to the curb where he'd parked his Harley. "I'll be back later."

  She followed him. "But everyone's here. This is our first day in our new home."

  "Tomorrow will be the second day," he muttered.

  "Dammit, Ink." She grabbed on to his wrist. "Don't be an asshole."

  His lips curved in anger and he shook his head. "I've always been an asshole. You knew that every time I pushed you away. You should've listened."

  He put on his sunglasses and straddled the motorcycle. "You need anything, ask Torque. He's real good about taking care of things."

  "What's that supposed to mean?" She planted her hands on her hips. "You don't talk to me for days, and now you're throwing out shit comments that I don't even understand what you're talking about."

  "Ask your dad. Ask Torque. Hell, ask anyone in your family." He held his arm out and slapped it. "They'll give you a clear view of the man who claimed you. Just know that they have no fucking clue, and they never will."

  "You tell me then," she whispered. "Don't do this to me."

  He stared into her eyes and revved the engine. She stepped down from the sidewalk to his side and yelled, "Please, don't go without talking to me first."

  He rode off without saying a word. She stood in the street, staring at him until he disappeared around the corner out of sight.

  Brandy approached her, putting her arm around Lilly's back and urging her out of the road. "Come on, honey. Let me help you make some sense out of the clutter inside while you wait for Ink to cool off. We'll get the place all set up and he'll come back."

  "What if he doesn't," she whispered, her voice cracking.

  Brandy leaned closer, pulling Lilly to her. "He will, baby."

  She allowed Brandy to take her inside the building. After a few minutes, she joined in and directed the men where to set everything and how she wanted the lights hung. The more she worked, the madder she became at Ink. She'd put up with enough from Ink shrugging her off and erecting a wall in front of him when all she wanted to do was go back to how it was before they were together. Right now, she'd give up the promise of a future to have one secret hour away with him if she could have the man she loved back.

  Chapter Twenty Six

  The U-Haul truck left hours ago, the motorcycles were gone, and the only vehicle remaining behind the Sterling Building was Lilly's black Ford Mustang. Ink glanced at his phone. It was seven o'clock.

  He'd lost track of time while out clearing his head. Eighty miles into Montana, he'd gassed up, had a beer, and decided he was a fool.

  Lilly had always accepted him. The knowledge that she knew why he tattooed his body was nothing new to her, but it was to him. He'd gone through life believing he'd hid his weakness from everyone. He hated that everyone assumed why he covered his arms and upper body with tattoos. He'd stopped cutting when he was a teenager. As an adult, he'd picked up the addiction in the for
m of tattoos. That was something nobody understood, even Lilly.

  He slipped his sunglasses off his head, put them in the pocket of his vest, and toed the kickstand when a man walked out of the alley between the Sterling Building and the vacant building to the east. He watched and like the other night when he'd spotted a man hanging around the building, the man hurried away and rounded the corner before he could get a good look at him.

  Uncomfortable spotting the same man skulking around the building twice, he started the motorcycle and took off down the street and around the block. He searched for the man, but the street was empty. To be safe, he circled the block two more times, coming from two different directions.

  The man simply disappeared.

  He continued to the back of the Sterling Building and parked. He got off his Harley and texted Kurt the description of the man, which wasn't much. Blue jeans, longer dark hair, and a sleeveless flannel shirt. Then he pocketed the phone. A local wouldn't be hanging around the business section at this time of night. The Silver Girls only opened on Friday and Saturday, the other shops on the block and the bank closed at five thirty every night.

  He tried the backdoor and found it locked. He got out his key, opened it, and walked inside. The moment he shut the door, an alarm went off.

  "Fuck," he muttered, going to the newly installed security panel and punched random buttons. He only had twenty seconds before the silent alarm notified the security company.

  He'd been working on the alarm when he found his chance to talk to Torque and never finished. Someone else must've finished his job. He growled, blindly putting in his birthdate, Lilly's birthdate. Nothing worked.

  A slim hand reached around him and tapped out the right code and the building fell silent. Lilly glanced at him and said, "It's the date I officially became your old lady. Torque finished the installation before he left."

  Then she walked off.

  He stood watching her ass swing side to side and then she took the stairs one at a time. He blew out his breath, closed his eyes, and took her attitude and the jab of Torque doing what he didn't. He deserved whatever she handed him for leaving her on the day they were making a new life together and being an asshole to her when she wasn't the one who made him angry.