by K. A. Linde
I held my hands up. “Irrelevant. It bothers me! Now, let’s talk about Brandon McCain and how he just hit on me.”
Emery gave me a look that said she didn’t believe my bullshit, but she wasn’t a pusher. She wouldn’t bother me until I gave up the info.
“Okay, are you going to hook up with him? Because he went from being like gruff hottie in high school to being an LA pretty boy,” Emery observed. “I don’t know if you could fuck a pretty boy.”
“Oh, I could. I assure you.”
“Plus, he used brah in a sentence without irony.”
I snort-laughed and signaled for another drink from Peter. “So, he’s not the sharpest tool in the shed. As long as he has a big, long tool I can use, then we’re good to go.”
“Oh my God!” Emery said, busting out in laughter. “I pray that he does, for your sake, Heidi.”
We hung out at the bar as more and more people showed up. It was even more than I’d anticipated. A lot of the local crowd hadn’t RSVP’d, so I’d thought it was mostly going to be out-of-towners. A lot of people had complained about the location and lack of food and it not being kid-friendly…and on and on. So many complaints. But it looked like a ton of people had shown up anyway. Probably because of the open bar I’d finagled.
By the time it seemed like most people had finally arrived, the bar was packed. Meredith had planned to make some kind of speech, but with the crowd, that would be impossible. I wasn’t worried about it, but she was.
Eventually, she gave up and turned on the slide show she had prepared with all the pictures that everyone had turned in for the reunion. The whole thing was a walk down memory lane.
I had only turned in a couple of pictures of me and Emery together, but it was almost obnoxious, how many images there were of me. It was never clearer to me that I had been totally obsessed with popularity. I cared nothing about it now, but I had deeply stressed over it at the time.
I was sure I had my dad to blame for a lot of that. We never had much, but he’d indulged me with everything I’d wanted at the time. I’d taken every cent. Man, how that had all backfired.
The football team was hooting and hollering over all the images of them. Landon was in nearly as many as I was. Then, one stopped on him in a high school golf polo, holding his club. My eyes shifted over to where he had been sitting all night with an IV of whiskey practically hooked into his arm. When he saw the picture, he openly cringed at it.
Then, his gaze found me. I quickly looked away.
I shouldn’t be looking at him. I shouldn’t be worried about him. I shouldn’t be wondering why golf was a trigger for him.
But I couldn’t seem to focus on anything else.
I’d tried to forget him.
I’d tried to stay away from him.
I’d tried not to look at him.
All I did was fail.
Our eyes met across the distance, and my heart tugged in his direction. He nodded his head back toward the exit. It was a question and a promise. I knew that, if I went out there, he’d kiss me again. And I would give in to him. Because I wanted to.
“Ugh, who sent in these pictures?” Emery asked from next to me.
I guiltily looked away from Landon and stared at the picture. It was Emery and Landon together after a football game. She was in his letter jacket, and they were laughing. The next one was of them seated side by side for their Best Couple shot for the yearbook. The one after that had Emery sitting in his lap by a bonfire. I was sitting next to them, grinning like a fool.
There were three or four others, all in a row. A barrage of Emery and Landon. One big fat reminder that the guy I was dreaming about had dated my best friend.
This wasn’t like Jensen, who hadn’t known Emery when she dated Landon. I’d been there with them through everything. I knew the good, the bad, and the ugly. Emery and I had spent hours lamenting over our love lives.
There was no way in hell that I should be interested in Landon. I wouldn’t allow it. I promised myself that I wouldn’t look in his direction again. No way, no how.
And, when Brandon McCain moseyed back over to talk to me, I let him hit on me and told myself I wasn’t going to feel guilty about it.
Four
Heidi
“Well, I’d call this a success,” Emery said a few hours later with a yawn.
“A rousing success,” I agreed.
“Way better than the five-year reunion.”
“Yeah. This time, they let me have it at a bar. People are way better when they’re drunk.”
“True. Also, people have actually changed…sort of…since then. Everyone had just graduated college at the five-year.”
“Or they were on their second kid,” I reminded her.
Emery laughed. “Or that.”
“I’m glad you came. You’re going back with Jensen now, right?”
Emery gave me a sheepish look. “Don’t act like you know me.”
“Of course I know you. We’ve been best friends since kindergarten, and now, we live together!”
I pulled my bestie in for a hug, and we swayed back and forth in a tipsy sort of slow dance.
“You’re the best,” Emery said.
“You’re the bestest.”
“Sorry to break up the romantic moment,” Jensen said with an amused grin, “but I don’t think we can go home until we get Landon safely back to Austin’s.”
Emery groaned. “But I’m so tired! I want to go home.”
“As do I, but if you haven’t noticed, he’s totally fucked up.”
I nodded my head. I had definitely noticed even though I was trying not to. Though people had slowly been leaving the place, most of the football players were still being rowdy in the back. Landon, who had never been the type, had even started to join in with their antics. It made me cringe. He must really be going through something to allow himself to be this far gone.
Emery yawned long and dramatically, as if to say, Please, dear God, let us go now.
I laughed at her.
“I’ll make sure he gets into a cab. I have to be here until bar close to settle up with Peter anyway. I won’t let Landon do anything stupid,” I told Jensen.
“Are you sure?” he asked. He got that look in his eye, like he was the older brother and had to guarantee the safety of all of his siblings. It was adorable.
“Yep. No worries. We have cabs coming at closing to get people. I’ll make the football players carry him into one. No big,” I told him.
Emery arched an eyebrow, and we had a silent conversation.
You’re going to help Landon into a cab, huh?
Yeah. So?
And there’s nothing going on?
No!
Sure.
There’s not.
I don’t believe you.
Fuck off, Robinson.
Whatever, Martin.
I laughed and pushed her toward Jensen. “Don’t worry about a thing. Go have a lot of monkey sex.”
Emery groaned. “I hate you.”
“Love you, too, hooker.”
“Thanks for doing this, Heidi,” Jensen said as he motioned for Emery to precede him out of Flips. “I really appreciate it. If anything goes wrong or if you need me, don’t hesitate to call.”
God, Jensen is such a nice guy.
“I won’t, but don’t worry; it’ll be fine.”
“Famous last words,” he muttered before following Emery outside.
I wanted to laugh off Jensen’s comment, but with the Wrights, something always went wrong.
Without Emery, the reunion deflated for me. I hadn’t kept in contact with anyone else from our senior class, other than Landon. We were all friends on Facebook and Instagram, but I wasn’t involved in their lives. I could go hang out with the cheerleading crowd, but I didn’t fit in with them now that they had their own mommy circle. I knew everyone, but suddenly, I felt very alone.
I slunk back over to the bar where Peter was cleaning a pile of glasses, gen
erally looking exhausted.
“Long night?”
He shrugged one shoulder. “Pretty busy in case you missed it.”
“Noticed that.”
Peter dragged a hand back through his shoulder-length hair and sighed. “You’ve got company.”
I whirled around at that comment, expecting to find Landon. Then, I quickly hated myself for that expectation. Instead, I found Brandon had returned with his pointed grin and flirtatious dude-bro personality.
“Hey, Brandon,” I said with a smile.
“Heidi,” he said, leaning me into the bar. “You want to get out of here?”
Just like that. No preamble or anything.
“I actually have to close down the bar for the reunion.”
“I can wait,” he said with a magnetic grin that I was sure worked on girls in LA.
“No, it’s okay. It’ll be boring, and I should just go home after that.”
Brandon’s grin slipped, and I could tell that his drunken mind was irritated. He hadn’t expected me to turn him down.
He twirled a lock of my hair around his fingers. “Come on, baby. I know you were into me in high school.”
I gently extracted myself from him. “That was more than ten years ago, Brandon.”
“Couldn’t have changed that much.”
“Funny you say that,” I said with growing aggravation. “I would say that I’ve changed a lot, but you wouldn’t know that, as you’ve spent the entire time talking to me about your awesome life in LA and all the roles you could have gotten but missed. I’m not interested. You missed your chance to get someone as amazing as me.”
I turned and strode away from him, feeling unbelievably empowered. Even though I could hear the words bitch and led me on being muttered under his breath. It might have been nice to flirt with him, but that didn’t guarantee that I had to go home with him. And it most certainly didn’t mean that he could push me around because of something I’d felt as a teenager.
Meredith announced from the front of the room that it was time for the bar to close and that everyone should head out now. A few people mentioned an after-party to the reunion, and groups started arranging to go to someone’s house to keep hanging out. I had no intention of doing that at all. I’d promised I’d get Landon home, and that was it.
When I found Landon, he was drinking straight out of a pitcher of beer someone had purchased for a game of beer pong on the patio attached to the side of the building. My eyes were round with concern at his level of inebriation. His eyes were glassy, and he was sloshing beer everywhere.
“Landon, I told Jensen I’d get you into a cab at bar close. It’s two. Time to go back to Austin’s and sleep this off.”
“Heidi, Heidi, Heidi,” he crowed, his words slurred. He slung an arm around my waist, ignoring the looks from the remaining football players in his crowd. “Don’t listen to Jensen. He doesn’t know shit.”
I easily slipped out of his grip. “Time to go, Landon.”
He placed the pitcher down on the table and stood up to look at me. But his balance was total shit. He stumbled forward into me, and I had to lean him up against the booth for him to stand straight.
“God, you’re fucked up.”
“Heidi,” he said again.
“What?”
“You heading out with McCain?”
I gritted my teeth. “What if I am?”
“Have at it, Martin,” Landon said, swinging his arm. “He only fucks anything that walks. Go for it, if you’re into that.”
“Even if I were into that,” I said in irritation, “it would be none of your goddamn business.”
“None of my business?” he said with a sharp laugh. “Right.”
His buddies patted him on the back and nudged his shoulder as they passed.
“See you at the after-party, Landon!” one guy called.
Landon yelled and held his hands up, “Yeah, man!”
The other guys cheered him on and then disappeared out of the now-empty room.
There was no way I was going to let him go to some party; that was for damn sure. He was too drunk to go anywhere.
“Landon, you’re drunk. Can you let me get you home, so I can fulfill my promise to Jensen?”
“Fuck Jensen!” Landon announced.
“I think Em has that covered,” I growled in frustration.
“Awesome. Another thing we have in common. Shitty wives, a penchant for whiskey, and my ex.”
“Would you cut it out?”
“I’d normally say blondes, too,” Landon said. He ran his hand through my long blonde locks and grinned at me.
I slapped his hand away from me and tried to remain calm. “Time to go. Let’s go. Right now.”
“Fine,” he grumbled as I shoved him toward the door.
We made it halfway across the room, veering awkwardly in his drunken stupor, before Peter came over to help me walk him outside. Only one more cab was waiting, and I breathed a sigh of relief. I could get him home. Then, this crazy night would be over.
Peter and I finally maneuvered Landon into the back of the cab.
“Thanks, Peter. I appreciate it.”
“Be careful, Heidi,” he said with a knowing look. “Wrights aren’t always right.” Then, he winked at me.
I felt my face flame at his words. From anyone else, I probably would have blown it off, but Peter didn’t say much. He watched and observed. If he had noticed something, then it was because it was blatantly obvious with just a look.
“Thanks for the advice, but you don’t have to worry about me.”
“I know,” he said with a nod. “You’re a fighter, just like your old man.”
I winced slightly at the comment. Perhaps that was supposed to be a compliment, but about my father…I could hardly take it as one.
“Thanks,” I muttered, trying for a smile. “You’re the best.”
I hopped into the cab behind Landon and coaxed Austin’s address out of him for the driver. I nearly kicked him when I found out it was only three blocks away. Not that I could have walked him down those three blocks, but I felt ridiculous, having a cab take him a walkable distance.
Getting him out of the cab was about as difficult as getting him into it, and I got the cab driver’s number, so I could call him when I needed a ride home. I didn’t think getting him inside was going to be any easier.
Eventually, we made it into Austin’s home and to the first-floor bedroom. I thanked the Lord that he wasn’t on the second floor. I wasn’t sure what I would have done about getting him up the stairs. I probably would have had to leave him on the couch.
I pushed him down onto the bed, and he tumbled backward.
“God, I’m drunk,” he muttered.
“Welcome to my world.”
“I never expected that you’d be the one taking the initiative,” he slurred. “You like it on top?”
“Don’t mess with me right now, Landon.”
“Hey, you pushed me back onto the bed.”
“Because you’re wasted, and I wanted to get you somewhere safe. Now, I’m going to go home, so I can get some sleep.”
He sloppily reached out for my hand. “Stay with me.”
I slipped my hand out of his with a shake of my head. “Not happening.”
Then, I went about finding water, Tylenol, and a small trash can to put beside the bed. He might get sick, and I didn’t want him to throw up all over Austin’s room.
“Guess we’re skipping that talk,” I muttered when I walked back in with my supplies to find Landon passed out.
I placed the water and Tylenol on the nightstand and proceeded to take off Landon’s shoes. He could sleep in the rest of his clothes for all I cared. I patted down his pockets to remove his wallet and cell phone. I dropped the wallet next to the provisions and plugged in his phone to the charger curled around the lamp.
The screen lit up, and for one nosy second, my eyes dropped down onto the screen.
I cringed when
I saw the entire screen was full of messages from Miranda.
I pulled my eyes away. Here I was, taking care of someone else’s husband when his wife had been messaging him nonstop. No matter what he had been going on between us—the feelings we’d been harboring for too damn long—I knew we were in the wrong.
We were so in the wrong.
My eyes landed on the lit screen one more time, and I guiltily read a few of the messages. I knew I shouldn’t, but if I saw what she was saying to him, then maybe it would give me the push to put this whole thing behind me for good.
Landon, I love you so much. Please, answer your phone.
I’ll always love you. I know we have a future together. We can’t be separated. Think about all we’ve been through.
We can make this work, Landon. I’m so sorry. I wasn’t in my right mind. I can’t imagine my life without you. Please, please, my love, please let’s work this out.
I jerked away from his phone, as if I’d put my hand into a bed of red-hot coals.
Holy fuck!
Miranda is a wreck!
She was a total wreck. And she had no idea that I had contributed to this in some way. She had no idea that her husband had come here and promptly kissed another woman. And that was all I was—the other woman.
He might be separated, but they weren’t over.
I stared down at him sleeping peacefully on the bed and wanted nothing more than to curl up beside him. But I wouldn’t.
Landon Wright didn’t belong to me.
He belonged to Miranda.
I wouldn’t be stupid enough to forget it again.
Five
Landon
“Fuuuck,” I groaned.
My stomach heaved, and I rolled over to find a conveniently placed trash can for me to empty my stomach into. Thank fuck!
After I was finally able to sit up, I squinted into the brightly lit room and tried to remember where the fuck I was. It looked like Austin’s place, but how had I gotten here? After kissing Heidi and seeing her talk to Brandon McCain, the rest of the night got kind of fuzzy.
I fumbled for the bottle of water on the nightstand and downed three-quarters of it before realizing there was Tylenol next to it. Someone must have read my mind. There was no way I’d gotten this all together last night. Not if I couldn’t even remember it.