Well Armed Brides: A Novel of the Highmage's Plight (Highmage’s Plight Series Book 5)

by D. H. Aire

  “Then, perhaps, it is fortuous that we now have Tristan, who can lend us some insight.”

  #

  The new warders guarded the Empress’s dungeons. Balfour was called to see to the latest resident’s injuries. Tristan gasped. The short warder raised his right hand, “You have no magery here.”

  Wide-eyed, he looked around. “This is a mistake. I’ve done nothing.”

  Balfour shook his head, “Really? Well, be sure to explain that to Her Majesty. I am certain that will make your trial more interesting.”

  Terhun entered, “Knock, knock… Hello, Tristan, what a pleasure to see you again. You missed the end of the palace festivities.”

  “You have no right! I’m the Tane’s ambassador!”

  “Hmm, you mean you were the ambassador. Her Majesty has rescinded your credentials under the circumstances. Of course, if you are helpful, she might… just might… take that into consideration.”

  “I’ve done nothing!”

  “Fine, then you won’t mind explaining to me why Lord Tane’s raised an army.” Tristan, gaze narrowed, clearly had no desire to say another word. Not until, Terhun added, “And he’s sent them to his border with Hayden.”

  “What?” Tristan gasped.

  “Yes, so many questions that action raises. Apparently Tane’s returned his loyalty to Her Majesty…”

  “I heard Lord Hayden died in this place. Did you torture him? You planning to do the same to me?”

  “Hayden dead?” Terhun said, glancing at Balfour. “Has something happened I’m not aware of?”

  “No, Master Terhun,” Balfour replied. “He’s in perfect health.”

  Tristan shook his head, “What?”

  Terhun replied, “Oh, you heard about the assassination attempt? Well, with so much going on, I thought it best to secure Hayden elsewhere. Good thing, too,” Terhun mused aloud.

  “He died… Everyone knows that…. Unless… You put Westerleaf in that cell?” Tristan muttered.

  “That was awful of me, wasn’t it?” Terhun replied. “It’s not like I knew someone would try to kill Hayden. But Westerleaf deserved whatever happened to him.”

  Tristan muttered, “Kolter.”

  “Is not going to be happy when his army gets their lord back rather than march here to avenge him.”

  “But, Kolter… oh.”

  “Oh, what, Tristan?” Terhun asked.

  “Free me, and I’ll tell you what I suspect.”

  “Afraid not… but pleasing the Empress, who will pronounce judgement on you, may just save you from the headsman.”

  “She wouldn’t dare,” Tristan said.

  “She’s not her mother, true,” Terhun replied. “But she’s been crazy enough to marry the human mage in full honors… however she does have the familial vindictive streak.”

  Tristan blanched. “If Kolter was behind the attempt… which he surely was. Then he must marry Lord Hayden’s daughter. She is no fool. If she’s fleeing to Tane, Kolter will do everything in his power to prevent her reaching it.”

  “Lord Tane has a heart, then?”

  “He truly loved his sister and has not exactly trusted his brother-in-law. He’s quietly kept in contact with her. The heir being my cousin’s niece has offered… possibilities.”

  “And what do you think he will do if she reaches him?”

  “He’ll use her to claim Hayden and turn their new army against him.”

  Terhun nodded, thinking Tane would then turn the combined troops against the Empress.

  Chapter 27 - How to Clean a Troll

  Lawson woke in the far too short bed, blinked, then stared. “Yel’ane, put that component down.”

  “You wouldn’t want me to drop it, would you?” she replied.

  I sat up. “It’s a critical piece, Yel’ane.”

  “Take off your clothes.”

  “What?” he rasped.

  “They stink,” she said. “They need to be washed and you can have them back once Le’ann washes them and they’ve had a chance to dry properly.”

  “Don’t be ridiculous, Yel’ane.”

  “I’ll break it. I swear it!” She threatened to throw it on the floor.

  “No… wait.” He pulled off his rather stiff and smelly jerkin, dropping it to the floor. “There take it.”

  “Your pants.”

  “You’ve my jerkin… I’m not taking off my—”

  “Take them off,” she said, threatening to throw it on the floor.

  “Not in front of you, I’m not.”

  “Lawson, I’m… I’m your wife,” she replied, wishing she weren’t at this particular moment.

  “Right,” he muttered.

  “Off… now.” She waved the component threateningly.

  Grimacing, he untied the rope holding up his baggy pants. “Take a good look, little wife.”

  She gaped as his pants dropped. “Oh, my.”

  “Now put the component down, gently.”

  She blinked, then, clutching it tight, ran through the opening door to the adjoining room. With a roar he raced after her. He saw the cord drawn taut too late, tripped and stumbled with a splash into the steaming trough of water. “What the—?”

  Yel’ane handed over the crescent shaped component to Re’ut. “Lawson, she’ll break it, if you try to climb out of that tub before getting clean.”

  He glared back at her. “Do you have any idea what I can do to you?”

  “Break me in half, if you’ve a mind.”

  He refused to admit the hot water was... rather nice as the dirt began to loosen.

  “You’d get cleaner faster with some soap.”

  “Soap?”

  “Don’t forget to wash his hair,” Re’ut said. “You give your wife any trouble and consider this smashed to bits.”

  “Soap?” he muttered.

  “Yel’ane will wash your hair… behave.”

  “Yes, Ma’am,” he muttered, thinking she reminded him of Mendra a bit, though, as a human woman she was much more ugly. Re’ut tossed him a rather large bar of soap and left them, trying not to think of just how well endowed the dwarf troll seemed to be. Wondering if all men were… She blinked, no; her sisters had often discussed the rumors about the few men in their land. Well, that well endowed was not something anyone had mentioned.

  Yel’ane moved behind him, swallowed hard, knowing he couldn’t see what she was doing and hastily slipped out of her livery and boots. In her bodice alone, loosening the drawstrings a bit, she stood behind the makeshift tub and began lathering his hair, which was softer than she had imagined. She took a bowl, scooped up water and poured it over his head. The hair seemed to glisten.

  Then she swallowed hard, drew back, then casually walked around until she was facing him.

  That’s when she realized his eyes were closed. “Ahem, Lawson, I take oath by the bond. I shall guard and keep you and bear you—”

  “Hmm?” Opening his eyes, gaped. “What the—” he drew up his knees, made as if to stand, quickly reconsidered, trying not to stare.

  “I’m your wife, Milord… I shall bear you many daughters.”

  “Of all the…” he muttered, “get out.”

  She shook her head, frowning. “No. But if you pass me the soap, I’ll wash your feet, which look disgusting.”

  “Huh?” He drew a foot from the water. “A bit dirty, I’ll admit… Oh, fine.” He tossed it to her.

  She scrubbed. He groaned. “Right foot,” she demanded.

  “Fine,” he said, raising his leg and shoving her back against the far end of the trough, “how’s that?”

  She grabbed up the soap and began scrubbing his toes. “I’m going to need to file these claws, I mean, nails down.”

  He hastily drew back his foot. “What?”

  Bracing her feet against the base of the trough, she yanked his foot back. “Stop that.”

  He stared at her.

  “Get used to it. I’ll not… bed a filthy husband.”

  “
I’ll stay filthy, as you call it, forever then… You’re a child! Not even a proper woman of my people!”

  “What’s wrong with me?” Yel’ane said. “I know I’m not ugly.”

  He winced. “To my people, I’m ugly, Yel’ane. A throwback, too short, and, well, Greth, now, the young ladies love him.”

  “Greth? But he’s so…”

  “He’s beautiful, Yel’ane. Do you understand?”

  “He’s not to me.”

  “Imagine then… let’s say we were to have a child. My people would think him or her even uglier than I am.”

  “You… you think me ugly?”

  He winced. “I should, but we’ve traveled together too long. Perhaps, I’m a throwback in more ways than one.”

  “Do you think I’m pretty?”

  He swallowed hard, “I think you’re a child. Children your age among the People are already as tall as I am. You really look like a toddler to me.”

  “Well, I’m not a child. Give me your other foot… Now, Lawson.”

  He offered her his other foot, and swallowed hard as she began to scrub. “Hold up your hands. Hmm, definitely going to need more than one file.”

  #

  “I don’t hear the world coming to an end,” Le’ann said as she scrubbed and scrubbed his jerkin in the wash basin.

  Another Sister stepped aside from scrubbing his pants as the next Sister did her best to help kill the odor emanating from it. “Do you think she’s taken the oath yet?”

  “The oath’s the easy part,” Re’ut said, coming outside, “you should see the size of his, uh, manhood.”

  The gossip between the Sisters only grew in the telling from there.

  #

  “Do you want my help, washing anywhere?” Yel’ane asked.

  “No!”

  “Then, uh, lean forward so I can wash your back, and behind your ears.”

  “Please, stay over there.”

  “Milord, the filing wasn’t so bad, was it?”

  “Those nails come in handy.”

  “Yes, I know… but I’d rather not worry about them raking me like… when some nasty looking creatures you’ve used them on.”

  “I wish you hadn’t seen that.”

  “You saved our lives, Milord.”

  “Stop this ‘Milord’ business.”

  “Can’t, Milord. It’s not seemly.” She marched around, the much smaller brick of soap in her hand. “Lean forward, so I can wash your back.”

  She washed his shoulders and down his back. “Lawson, is it getting a bit warm in here?” she asked, her cheeks feeling flush.

  “Um, I don’t think so, why?”

  “Oh, no reason,” she said, then swallowed and leaned over to complete the bonding ritual and moved to kiss his cheek.

  Lawson turned her head, wondering what she was up to and found her lips suddenly planted on his.

  #

  Re’ut came running as a Sister pounded on the door as water poured forth beneath it. “Yel’ane! Are you all right?”

  It was locked. “I’m… I’m fine! Go away!”

  “You sure you are all right?” Re’ut cried.

  “Leave my wife and I alone!” Lawson shouted.

  The Sisters looked at each other, then blocked the doorway as the warders approached and hesitantly asked if all was well.

  Yel’ane shouted, “Leave us alone! We’re… we’re fine!”

  #

  Lawson just lay there in what remained of the trough he had broken apart in his surprise, staring up at Yel’ane, who he held up over his chest, her arms and legs flailing.

  “Put me down,” she whispered, her eyes tightly closed.

  He groaned. “We are never ever going to talk about this.”

  “Um…”

  “I’ll tell them you’re my wife… we just won’t talk about this.”

  “Uh, I didn’t mean to kiss you like that.”

  “I…” he winced. “I know that.”

  “Can I get you a towel?”

  “Sounds like a good idea.”

  She glanced around. “It’s over there. Put me down.”

  He did, then sat up, hands in his lap. “Hurry up with that towel.”

  She sighed, crossing her arms as she walked in front of him. “They’ll want to meddle… Won’t believe…”

  “They’ll believe what we tell them,” he rasped. “Towel. Now.”

  There were tears in her eyes as she shook her head.

  He sighed. “Well, I may have something that could help make them believe we’re, uh, committed to each other,” he rasped. “But it may create… another problem for you.”

  “Anything…”

  “Towel.”

  She brought it to him.

  With a grimace, he muttered, “What else don’t I know about our… situation?”

  Biting her lip, “Huh?”

  His eyes narrowed. “Yel’ane, we’ve known each other a while. I know when you are holding back. So, what is it?”

  “The girls…” she slowly replied.

  “What about the girls?”

  #

  Water pooled down the hall, dripped through the wood floorboards. The Innkeeper was beside himself, shouting. Sergeant Grigg could be heard grumbling, “Just add it to the bill.”

  The warders guarding the hallway stood free of it, the waters simply flowing around them. “Re’ut, should we go in there?” Le’ann asked.

  “Sounds like she’s handling it,” she replied. “Let them enjoy their brief honeymoon.”

  “But she is rather young to take on such a role in a House,” Le’ann said.

  “She’s not the first and likely won’t be the last. And, well, somehow, I don’t think she’s as young as she appears… not from what my niece told me, anyway.”

  “You don’t believe that nonsense about the dragon.”

  “I don’t know what to believe… but Lawson sure does. I don’t think he would have agreed to… well, accept her oath and make it official, otherwise.”

  #

  Yel’ane called for Re’ut, who entered with Le’ann. “Is everything all…” Re’ut began, staring at Lawson and Yel’ane, who stood wrapped in bedsheets.

  “Give me back my component,” he demanded.

  Re’ut strode forward and placed it in his outstretched hand.

  “Thank you… and never ever do such a thing again.”

  Yel’ane said, “We won’t. On my honor as head of your House, Milord.”

  Le’ann and Re’ut look at each other.

  Yel’ane said, “Perhaps, you require some proof?” She shrugged out of her sheet and stood facing them.

  The two women gasped.

  “Now that that’s settled,” Yel’ane said. “Lord Lawson, uh, has a request.”

  “A request?” Re’ut muttered.

  “Yes,” he replied. “I want you to send a message to En’sta and my other… daughters by bond. Tell them I have a number of things to discuss with them. I am claiming them… and not waiting seven years.”

  “You can’t!” Le’ann gasped.

  Lawson glanced at Yel’ane. “Take it up with her later, but send the message and, please be so kind as to see to drying my clothes in the other room.”

  “Lawson and I,” Yel’ane said, “would like to get some sleep.”

  “As… My Lady… commands,” Re’ut replied as the two hastily left.

  With a sigh, Lawson walked over the table and linked the component to another. It glowed. “This, my dear, is a ‘blank.’ It blanks us to scrying and magical influences and serves as a sort of negative signal to… well, Mother.”

  “Mother?”

  “She wouldn’t like me calling her that… but she acts like one.”

  “Huh?” Yel’ane muttered, uncertainly, then with a shake of her head she reached down to peeled away the waxy red brown substance he had used to make it appear they had… done the deed.

  “Uh, Yel’ane, wait, you—”

  “Ow!�
�� she cried, stared. “Hey!”

  “Uh, hair removal is a side effect of using the wax.”

  She glared at him, eyes watering, “And you haven’t thought to use it on yourself?”

  “Why would I do that?”

  “You’d look more, well, human.”

  He blinked. “No, thanks. I’m a troll, remember?”

  She picked up the sheet on the floor and wrapped it around her torso, then climbed into bed, “Fine. Now come on, you promised to teach me.”

  With a sigh, he took his mem-pad and stylus and handed it to her, doffing his sheet and spreading it out as a blanket over her as she settled in.

  She giggled, touching the slippery feeling pad that contained what appeared to be blank sheets of paper. Numbers appeared. “Uh, I, um, love the numbers… Can we, well, work on geometry?”

  “Yes,” he replied.

  She thought briefly about getting dressed, instead she wrapped herself back in her blanket, still feeling the wax’s sting. She soon nestled up to Lawson on the bed.

  He blushed.

  Glancing at him, she asked, “I don’t think I’ve ever asked you. Just how old are you, anyway?”

  “Um, well, actually, I believe it is sixteen in human years.”

  “Oh.” She suddenly smiled, “Aren’t we a pair? Now, show me more about circles.”

  He sighed, taking the stylus from her. “What is it with you and circles?”

  She frowned, “Well, they remind me of those dragon scales… kind of mesmerizing, you know?”

  Chapter 28 - Grooming a Troll Can Be Painful

  George woke in the dark with a start and found Raven laying half across his chest with Se’and a shadow in the bed beside her. “Uh, hi.”

  Raven was watching him, lolled her human tongue, leaning close and licked his cheek. “Mmm.”

  “Uh, where are my clothes?”

  Se’and began to stir as Staff glowed. :It’ll be dawn in thirty-three minutes.:

  “Not wake her,” Raven said. “She tired… need rest.”

  “She is, is she? Uh, I feel like I’ve forgotten something important.”

  Raven shook her head, “Not important. We here for you.”