The 17-Year-Old Itch

by M. J. O'Shea

  “I’ve noticed that too,” Blair jumped in. He rarely spoke without being asked a direct question, but Blair was a little like Joey in that he hated awkward situations. He obviously wanted to rescue Tony’s dumb ass. “It’s not a huge deal, though. In general, I think we’re all so lucky to be where we are. A few people acting like we’re kids isn’t a big deal.”

  Tony nodded. He didn’t want to come off like a dickhead, after all. He took the opportunity to glance over at Casey, who was looking anywhere but at Tony. Good. He got the fucking point. I’m not a kid. You can’t screw around with me anymore.

  “TONY, CAN we talk?” Casey looked sad and concerned. They’d just gotten out of the Devon Jones interview and were free for the rest of the evening. All Tony wanted to do was find an extra-large drink and dive to the bottom of it.

  “Did I fall into some sort of time warp?” Tony made a face. “Is this… Groundhog Day?” How many times could Casey ask to talk to him? It always had the same fucking result.

  “I’m being serious. I want to talk.”

  “Serious? You want to talk?” Tony was flabbergasted. He rolled his eyes. “Fuck off.”

  Casey could go to hell. First, all anyone ever wanted to do lately was talk, and Tony was tired of it. He didn’t want to talk about it with Levi or Blair, and he sure as hell didn’t want to talk about it with Casey. Don’t let the door hit your ass on the way out, Casey. Fuck that shit.

  “Tony, that’s not fair. I feel—”

  “Let’s get something straight. I don’t care what you feel. I had a misguided moment last week, where I thought things were a lot different than they clearly are. I’m pretty sure I’ve said this before, but I’ll say it again, and this time with emphasis. Lose my number. I’m not in the mood for any more booty calls. I’ll see you next time we have a scene together.”

  Tony didn’t wait for an answer. He couldn’t stand the thought of looking Casey in the face. The whole thing was just stupid. He’d had it all worked up in his head—star-crossed lovers, can’t be together because of the show, Casey would learn to love him, blah, blah, blah. It was all so much bullshit. Turned out it really wasn’t anything at all. Nothing real at least.

  “WE GOING out?” he asked Blair as soon as he got into the car. Sander was away visiting relatives for the week, and Tony was still in a mood.

  “You gonna explain to me why you need to so much? What was that back there?” Blair gripped the steering wheel of his car. He looked annoyed. Worried. Everything Tony would be if Blair had snapped out of character so much.

  “That was me being pissed. I’m sorry. I’ve had a long week, and there’s been some patronizing assholes who think they can act like I’m not worth it.”

  “Babe, who?” Blair reached over and covered Tony’s hand. He was already in worried-friend mode. Tony didn’t want to add to it.

  “It doesn’t even matter. Did Levi say he wanted to go out?”

  “Yeah. He said he’d meet us at the bar in an hour. Wanna just get dinner there? I think Seth has been experimenting with his menu.”

  “Sure. I’m probably going to get nachos, though. And pasta. And beer.”

  Blair giggled. “Whitney’s going to massacre you if you don’t fit into your pants on Monday.”

  “At least mine are looser than yours.” Tony smirked.

  Blair always had it really bad, having to wear Ryder’s fitted trousers and tailored-to-the-centimeter shirts. If he gained an ounce, it showed.

  “Shut up.”

  THERE WERE a lot of fans gathered at the bar, which wasn’t unusual for the most part. But that night there were way more than usual. It seemed like people had gotten wind that the cast members were planning to be there, and as Levi circled the block, the crowd had grown significantly. It was a trip. Even at the beginning of season one, when not very many people cared what they did or who they were, there had been hopefuls—only a few, but still—hanging outside the bar. Back then it had been a novelty, something cool. With the huge crowds that waited in line to get into the kitchy old pub, it was actually a little scary.

  Tony was close to telling the others they should just head home when one of the guards led them to a parking space in the employee lot behind the bar. The fans hadn’t figured out where that lot was—it was unmarked, and Seth had put a fence around it, so people couldn’t easily find it.

  They were quickly ushered in by the bouncer. Tony wondered if they’d have to start going somewhere else. The Pirate’s Booty had turned into Key West’s version of the Ivy. The fans would never go away as long as they thought hanging around would guarantee them a celeb sighting.

  Tony, Blair, and Levi made their way into the back of the bar through the kitchen entrance. Seth gave them all quick hugs and told them to head to their usual roped-and-curtained-off seating area. Tony still wasn’t used to the VIP treatment. He’d have thought that after over a year, it would’ve become commonplace, but it wasn’t. It felt weird to be behind the woven straw curtains that Seth had installed. He still felt like he didn’t belong most of the time.

  Their usual server made her way over. “Hey, guys. Crazy crowd out there tonight. Did you send out a notice or something?” She grinned at them like nothing was a big deal, and Tony supposed to her it wasn’t. Shanna was a typical laid-back island girl. Perma-tan, glowing sun-lightened hair, big smile. He’d always liked her. She never seemed to be very impressed by their importance. It was nice.

  “Hey, Shanna. It is pretty crazy.” Tony looked around the privacy curtain to the crowd outside the door. They looked restless, irritated, like they were promised something they weren’t getting. It made Tony wonder what had happened. Usually he was happy to go mingle with his fans. He didn’t think it was a good idea after the day he’d had. One pissy word and it’d be all over tumblr if he was lucky, the tabloids if he wasn’t. “I don’t know why all of them are here. Maybe it’s just because it’s Friday.”

  “I don’t think so. There seems to be some rumor floating around. I heard that a few of them were out there looking exclusively for you. Did you put anything online about coming here?”

  Tony shrugged. “Not unless one of the media crew tweeted something from my account. I wouldn’t be surprised. Annoyed, but not surprised. They’re always trying to build up a buzz.”

  Shanna looked annoyed as well. Tony couldn’t imagine what a pain all those people were for the employees. “Maybe so. Anyway, what can I get you boys?”

  “Long Island for me,” Tony said. “Keep ’em coming.”

  “Yikes. Hard day?”

  He grunted. “The worst.”

  Blair smiled at Shanna. “I’ll take a vodka cran and some nachos for Mr. Keep ’Em Coming over here.” He shot Tony a look. “You need some food or you’re going to be puking.”

  “Okay. You eat those. I’ll take my own order of nachos too.”

  “Funky Buddha IPA for me,” Levi said. “And how ’bout a chicken strip basket.”

  “Oh, and I’ll have some calamari and a plate of spring rolls too,” Blair added.

  “Is that all?” Levi asked. “I mean, there are other things on the menu you can order.”

  “Might as well say fuck off to the diet, right?” He grinned at the boys. “Whitney can plaster me in my pants on Monday.”

  Levi grinned at him. “Might as well. Whitney gets bored without a challenge.”

  AS THE night wore on and the drinks kept coming, Tony found himself in a better mood. It helped having his boys with him to laugh at themselves and crack dumb jokes over nachos and fried chicken. It didn’t help to have fans sneaking into the VIP area for selfies with the boys of Coconut Cove. Again, it was really weird. The fans were usually super respectful or at least moderately respectful. They might have taken pictures from a distance if the curtains were open, but having people sneak in was a first. Tony grinned and bore it until Shanna came by to remind the girls that the area was VIP only.

  “Ladies, I’m going to need to have you move to
the public area of the bar.”

  “But Tony invited us back here, didn’t you?” one of them said. Her name was like Chelsea or Britney or Jessica. Really, Tony had no idea. Apparently they were tight enough that he wanted them back in the VIP section. Usually he would’ve let the girls stay for a round before he sent them on their way, but he silently shook his head at Shanna. She made a face at the three girls.

  “You guys need to move. There’s still a few stools left at the main bar if you get there quick enough.”

  “But he said…,” the most persistent one whined.

  “What did I say?” Tony asked.

  “That you’d be here looking for a lovely lady to take to the MTV Movie Awards with you and that you were looking for… you know. Companionship.” She grinned.

  “What the fuck?” Tony was too tipsy and too shocked to watch his mouth. He made a strangled face at Shanna, who wasn’t exactly bodyguard sized but had this no-nonsense look about her that made people listen.

  “You’ve gotta go, girls.”

  “I’ll see you around, Tony. I think it’s hot that you play a little gay boy on television, but you’re still down to fuck some of us fans.”

  What. The. Fuck.

  Tony shot out of the booth. He was only a little tipsy after two rounds of drinks, but after the day he’d had….

  Levi reached his arm out to push Tony back into his seat. “Ladies, I think you really need to leave. We’ve had a long day, and we’re just trying to relax, okay?”

  The girls looked a little annoyed that promises weren’t being met, but they finally grabbed their handbags and moved to the other side of the ropes and curtains.

  “What the hell was that?” Blair asked.

  “Fuck if I know. Last time I touched a girl other than just joking around was, like, eighth grade,” Tony muttered. “That was gross.”

  “Yeah. Sorry, man. That was probably the last thing you needed after the week you seem to have had.” Blair’s last sentence was a little pointed. Tony got the point.

  “I need to check my phone,” he muttered. Changing the subject from my week. We’re not talking about that.

  Sure enough, when he opened his Twitter, there was a tweet about how he’d be at the Booty looking for a date for the award show in a few weeks and for some casual fun. Seriously, what the fuck?

  “You think PR would’ve done this?” he asked. He was out. Way out. They liked bringing attention to the show, but it didn’t seem like it would be in their best interest to create such a mess.

  “No. That’d just bring bad press. Everyone knows you’re gay. At least I thought they did.” Levi looked perplexed. He took a long, stressed pull on his beer. “I have no idea who would’ve done that. Who has access to your account info?”

  “I guess the people who run our social media accounts and anyone who might know them?”

  Blair made a face. “I hate to say it.”

  “What?”

  “Is anyone else smelling Howie in this?”

  Tony wouldn’t be surprised. He hadn’t been very nice to Howie at the start-of-season barbecue, and Howie had a history of having a long memory. “He’s such an asshole. If this ends up being his handiwork, I’m going to slam him into the ground.”

  “With my help,” Levi muttered.

  “Anyway, enough of that.” Tony took a deep, cleansing breath. “Shots, gentlemen?”

  Levi shook his head, but Blair decided he was in. Tony ordered a couple of shots for each of them, dorky ones with embarrassing names that they crowed at the top of their lungs before they threw them back. After a Blow Job, a Redheaded Slut, and a Cowboy Cocksucker, on top of the three drinks he’d already had, Tony was on his way to feeling no pain. Finally.

  “BLAIR?”

  Tony felt like his bed was swimming, like he was in the ocean behind the house, floating, not steady. It was usually pleasant. Not so much at the moment. He thought he might throw up. They’d finally just made it back to the house in a cab, and Levi planned to crash on the couch and grab his car the next day. Tony wasn’t ready for bed anymore. Not like he’d been at the club, where he felt like the fans were slowly closing in like a pack of man-eating amoebas or something.

  “What’s up, sweetie?” Blair stuck his head in the door.

  “Can you get Levi too?” Tony asked. Might as well get it over with. Whatever they’d slipped into his tequila made him want to talk. He was tired of keeping the secret. It had been months of feeling weird and not being able to tell his best friends about it. Blair nodded. He returned a minute later with Levi in tow.

  “What’s going on, little man?” Levi asked.

  “Sit down, you two. You’re making me dizzy.”

  Levi had an egg sandwich. It smelled good, and Tony thought he might want to eat one, but the thought of choking down eggs and bread made him want to throw up a little too. He wasn’t sure which instinct was stronger.

  “What’s going on?” Blair asked as soon as he and Levi were both on Tony’s bed. It was nice to have his two friends right there, platonic as hell, despite what all the tabloids would have people believe, but nice.

  “I wanted to tell you guys what’s been up with me. Just wanted to deal with it all at once rather than one at a time. I don’t want to have this conversation twice. Or ever again.”

  Blair so obviously tried to keep a calm face. It was clear he wanted to jump right in with the interrogation.

  “I’m glad you’re finally talking” was all he said.

  Tony tried to work himself into thinking it was no big deal. He could tell them. It was fine. Fine. They won’t judge you.

  “SO, THERE was a guy. B, you were right.”

  Blair made a quiet screeching whiny noise that Tony would’ve laughed at if he wasn’t drunk and scared to tell them the rest of the truth. “You had a secret boyfriend? I can’t believe I didn’t know.”

  “You kind of did, and no. Definitely not a secret boyfriend. He didn’t want anything like that.”

  “Did you?” Levi asked. His usually laid-back voice got sharp. He’d always been protective.

  “Yeah. I thought things had changed, but he pulled a dine-and-dash on me the other morning. You know, when I was so pissed?” He looked up at Blair.

  “He left you? In bed? That’s bullshit. Who is this guy?”

  Tony attempted to reach out and pat Levi’s shoulder. Mostly he got air and a bit of shirt fold. “That’s the thing. It’s really awkward.”

  “Who is it?” Levi repeated. He was so sweet and laid-back. Until he wasn’t. His face looked pretty fucking intense at the moment.

  “It, um, might be—” Tony cleared his throat. “—Casey,” he whispered.

  Blair’s and Levi’s reaction would’ve been hilarious if Tony was in the mood to laugh.

  “You can’t be serious,” Blair said. He looked totally pissed too. “I thought that was just a crush thing and it was over a long time ago.”

  “I’m totally serious. I wish I wasn’t, but I am. Casey and I had a thing at the end of last season, like you guessed. I thought it was real. He thought I was someone to fuck but never tell anyone about.” Tony shook his head once before he realized that was a super bad idea. “I made the mistake of thinking he finally wanted something last weekend when I slept with him. Not going to do that again.”

  “I’m going to kick his ass,” Levi said quietly. Levi wasn’t the loudest guy, but when he got mad, it wasn’t a good scene. Everyone knew that.

  “And this is why I didn’t want to tell you two.” Tony groaned. “Please don’t do anything. I’m embarrassed enough just to have thought I had a chance with him.”

  “What?” Blair, sweet, shy Blair, looked like he was about to take a chunk out of someone’s ass too. “We’re your friends. We get to protect you, asshole. And you’re so much better than him. Don’t say that about yourself.”

  “Just listening is enough, okay, guys? I don’t want you two getting in trouble with the producers over me.
It’s… over. Okay?”

  “Fucking asshole,” Levi muttered. “Who does that?”

  “Lots of people.” Tony found himself reaching out to comfort Levi, ironically. It had helped a lot to tell his friends. A big part of him wished he had done it way earlier. “Can I have a hug?” he asked.

  Levi and Blair pounced on top of him, a little more enthusiastically than his stomach was ready for, but after a deep breath, it felt nice to have his friends nearby.

  “The tabloids would be having a field day right about now,” he joked, thinking about how they’d react to the three of them in one bed.

  Blair and Levi burst into tipsy giggles.

  “This is so hot,” Levi joked. He lunged for Tony’s neck and bit it hard. “Mmmmm, sexy.”

  “You’re so dumb.” Tony kneed him in the balls. “Love you guys.”

  “Love you too, T,” Blair said.

  “Love you,” Levi echoed.

  If nothing else, at least he had them.

  Chapter Nine

  JOEY WANTED to kill Mack. Like, dead. Everyone knew better than to leave a friend sitting alone with one of their parents. It wasn’t that Evan wasn’t a nice guy. Joey was sure he was a super cool dad or whatever. It didn’t mean he wanted to be stuck in the B and B’s old-fashioned kitchen having a brownie and milk with him while Mack changed into his beach clothes.

  “Um, these are great, sir.” Joey nearly choked on the sir. It probably sounded as awkward as it felt. “I like the peanut butter chips.”

  “Evan, please. You really don’t have to call me sir. I’m glad you like them.” He smiled warmly at Joey.

  Mack, get your ass down here. Joey liked Mack’s dads, but it was still incredibly awkward.

  “So, how are things at school?” Evan asked.

  “Um, I have a boyfriend,” Joey spat out. Jesus, you’re such a dork. Like Mack’s dad wanted to hear about his new boyfriend.