Toronto Collection Volume 3 (Toronto Series #10-13)

by Heather Wardell

  When the knock came at our office door thirty minutes later, I made sure not to be the one to answer. The forum manager who'd been trying to go get a sandwich was closest to the door, so he pulled it open.

  "Pizza delivery," a deep voice said from the hallway.

  A sigh of relief rippled through the office, but it died when it reached Patricia and her outrage. "What? We didn't order pizza."

  "Someone did."

  "Who?"

  A guy who looked like a wrestler stepped into the office, the boxes he carried giving off a tantalizing aroma. "I can't say."

  "Why not?"

  He shrugged. "Order says not to say. I do what I'm told. It's paid for, though. You want it or not?"

  "We do," the forum manager said before Patricia could speak again, and took the boxes. "Thanks."

  Percy hopped up and pulled his wallet from his pocket. "Thanks a lot," he said, tipping the delivery guy a ten.

  The guy smiled and departed, leaving us with pizza and a pissed-off Patricia.

  "Who ordered it?"

  We all sat looking innocent. Of course, everyone but me was innocent.

  She seemed to realize she was a few more whiffs of pizza away from a mutiny. "Fine. But you have ten minutes and I'm not staying here with you. I hate pizza."

  If I'd known that I'd have ordered it far earlier.

  She slammed out of the office and the tension level dropped to zero the second she disappeared.

  Percy eyed the door. "The warden's gone. Quick, let's get eating."

  We cleared the conference table and set to. I'd ordered three large pizzas to be sure we had enough: one with ham and pepperoni, one with just cheese, and one with veggies.

  The forum manager swallowed his first bite with his eyes closed in ecstasy, then said, "Best pizza ever." He opened his eyes and inspected his slice. "The tomato chunks are weird, though. Good, but weird."

  Percy, sitting next to me, bumped his leg against mine.

  Oops. So much for anonymity. In my haste I hadn't remembered that he would recognize the fresh tomatoes pieces as being my doing.

  I turned toward him, not wanting him to tell the group and hoping I could stop him.

  I didn't have to, though; he gave me a warm sweet smile, his eyes full of amusement and something like pride, then said, "So, guys, who do we think ordered this?"

  His look filled me with such happiness I could barely breathe, but I managed to mumble, "Don't know," along with the others.

  The forum manager said, "Well, whoever it was, he or she is my new best friend."

  "Amen," Percy said, looking straight ahead and letting his leg touch mine again.

  *****

  That night, after a fun-filled day of sticking labels to envelopes while trying to ignore Patricia's lack of appreciation for our help, I loaded Paddington into the car and set out for the nature preserve.

  I walked slowly along, watching him bound through the snow and dig for buried and no-doubt-stinky treasures and generally have a wonderful time, and rejoiced that I was out there with him instead of at the pet shelter.

  A little part of me still felt guilty for bailing out on the dog-walking program, but I'd hated it so very much and I was still helping even though now I wasn't hands-on. For my entire adult life I'd thought I should directly help the needy, but now it was clear to me that helping like that, at least with the dogs, wasn't good for me.

  Helping was good for me. Many of my readers had included some variant of 'help others' on their 'good to yourself' task lists and they'd been right. The glow of buying pizza for my coworkers hadn't faded, and Percy discovering it had been me hadn't changed the glow at all. I wasn't happy because he knew, I was happy because I'd done it. I would keep finding ways to help people, people I knew and people I didn't, but I didn't need to do it in a way that didn't feel good.

  After all, I was a 'people' too, right? I had to take care of myself.

  Paddington trotted over and dropped a wet mitten at my feet, then sat wagging his tail staring up at me.

  "How do you always manage to find the slimiest thing on the ground, buddy? At least it's not a sock like you found when Percy was here." I picked up the mitten by the thumb, then slung it forward as far as I could. "Go get it!"

  He raced after it, but was fortunately distracted by a stick near it so I didn't end up having to throw it again.

  Walking along the path Percy had introduced me to, I wished I'd invited him. When we'd finally finished the stupid giveaway at nearly six o'clock, my only thought had been getting out of the office and back home where I could do a little work on my site before tomorrow's decision. It might be too late, but I still wanted to build on what I'd already done. But when I got home, the thought of doing anything but relaxing after such a crappy day had been unbearable.

  Now, though, I wished I had Percy with me. Somehow I always felt calmer and more relaxed when he was around, even if we were laughing like fools. Calmer, and safe and happy.

  From what I'd heard, exactly how you were supposed to feel with a boyfriend.

  I struggled for another second with it, with feelings I'd never imagined I could have, then gave in: I liked Percy. Liked liked him. I never would have thought that was possible but I wanted us to be more than friends.

  But without the passion I'd felt for Felix and for that guy at the Mississauga hotel, the kind of passion I was used to, how could that ever happen? I didn't want a sexless relationship and I couldn't see how being with someone as nice as Percy could be anything else. When he touched me I didn't want to strip him naked and run away at the same time and that was all I'd ever known.

  So we'd have to stay friends, because I didn't know how we could be anything more.

  Chapter Forty-Seven

  When I got to work the next morning, wearing my favorite teal scarf for good luck, my heart skipped a beat at the sight of Percy sitting beside my desk. How had I not noticed before how cute he was? Well, I was certainly noticing now.

  "Hey," he said, his eyes and smile warm, and gestured toward two Starbucks cups on my desk. "Thought you might like a little something before the meeting."

  I tossed my coat over the back of my chair and sat facing him. "Thanks," I said, feeling shy and a little unsure. I'd realized I liked him, but he hadn't done anything to suggest he felt the same way. No attempted kisses or 'accidental' butt touches, the way I was used to. I didn't know how to proceed.

  He reached out and rubbed my shoulder. "You'll be okay, Flipper," he said, speaking the nickname softly even though we were the only ones in the office. "Don't worry."

  "Do you think I got the job?" I whispered. I hadn't planned to ask but I couldn't stop myself.

  His hand closed over my shoulder, warm and strong. "I don't know."

  His honesty made my heart lurch but he went on at once. "I don't know, but I do know that you'll be okay. You're too good and too smart not to be."

  His sincerity soothing me, I said, "Thank you. I hope you're right."

  "I'm always right."

  I laughed at his matter-of-fact tone.

  "What's so funny? I am."

  "Of course you are."

  We smiled at each other, then mine faded. Needing a hug, I leaned forward until my head rested against his chest. "I'm scared," I said softly. "I've wanted this for so long, and now..." And now I was so close and everything felt strange and wrong.

  He wound his arms around me. "I know," he murmured. "And I wish I could help."

  I shut my eyes, slid my arms around him, and relaxed into his embrace. "You are."

  He held me close for a long moment, until an exaggerated throat-clearing made me leap back from him.

  "Sorry." Felix gave me a brilliant and obnoxious smile. "Didn't mean to startle you. I guess you didn't realize we came in."

  He, Patricia, and Sasha stood in the doorway holding Starbucks cups of their own.

  "I guess not," I said, trying to recover at least a little dignity.

  "Well, yo
u were busy," he said, and his tone sucked away nearly all the joy and comfort I'd felt in Percy's arms.

  Not all of it, though, and as I gathered myself up to head for the conference room I nurtured the tiny bit of warmth and safety Felix had left me and cuddled it close to myself, so that by the time I walked into the room I felt wrapped in Percy's words and I knew he was right. Whatever happened, I'd be fine. If I got the job, or didn't, I'd be fine.

  What was not fine, though, was what Felix did say.

  "Today is in fact the end of the twenty-eight days, but given yesterday's... difficulties... Kelvin and I have decided to extend the competition."

  Sasha shut her eyes, and Patricia groaned as if it weren't remotely her fault that the deadline had changed.

  I tried hard to keep my voice steady. "For how long?"

  He turned to me. "Just over the weekend. And we've added one more element. Monday morning you will each do a presentation showing us your site and how you interpreted the 'good to yourself' mandate. Be sure to let us know how your traffic has improved and what your readers think of your site, and back everything up with hard facts."

  An odd sick feeling churned through me. I was a good presenter, better than either Sasha or Patricia, so I didn't understand why this bothered me. Maybe because he hadn't said so beforehand and now I had nothing prepared? No time to think about my discomfort, though, since he was going on.

  "After the presentations, we'll confirm our decision then take you separately..." He paused for an instant too long, looking at me, so the 'take you' part took on a different meaning. I looked away, feeling disgusted, and he continued. "So we can tell you privately who won, and then we'll announce it to the forum managers and anyone else who needs to know."

  Percy was the only one in the 'anyone else' group, and I didn't like the way Felix made it sound like Percy didn't matter.

  Of course, he probably genuinely thought that.

  "Well, off you go," he said, as if we'd been loitering instead of listening to him. Yet again, trying to put us off-balance. "Three more days until Monday. Make them count."

  He went into his office and we trailed out of the conference room. Patricia ignored us and returned to her desk, where she immediately put on her headphones and began typing intently.

  "Planning another giveaway, no doubt," Percy said softly. "Let's hope this one's digital."

  Sasha grinned at him. "Indeed. Well, back to the grindstone, I guess. Can I post about how being jerked around for a job isn't good for myself?"

  "Sure, why not?" I smiled at her. "Unless you think it might make you lose the contest."

  She pointed a threatening finger at me. "Don't mess with my mind, missy."

  "There are other tables available," I said in my best imitation of her broken-record technique.

  She laughed and we gave each other a high five, then she walked back to her desk while I wondered if we'd still be friends after Monday's announcement. I hoped so, but we were both competitive and it might be tricky. In that regard it'd be better if Patricia won, but that would be a gross injustice.

  "I've missed an inside joke, I think," Percy said, "but that's okay. Look, about our dinner Sunday night..."

  My heart sank. I'd been looking forward to it. "Yes?"

  "If you'd rather we go some other time so you can work on your presentation, I'm okay with that."

  I shook my head, feeling warm relief flooding me. "No way. It can be my reward after getting the presentation done."

  He smiled, clearly as happy as I was. "For once I'm the reward instead of the punishment."

  I laughed. "Don't get used to it. But I should warn you, I might have to make it a little more of an early night if I need more practice."

  "Of course. And I'd be happy to help you practice if you need it."

  "Aw, thanks. You're the best."

  Our eyes met. He smiled, and said, "I try," in his usual joking tone, but I thought I saw something deeper and richer in his eyes.

  It scared me, but I liked it.

  *****

  He had barely returned to his desk when Patricia said, "Percy, I need your help."

  "With your presentation?"

  "Of course," she said, not quite snapping but close.

  My head jerked up and I took a breath to shut her down, but bit back the words before I could. Percy was a big boy, he didn't need me to take care of him.

  My urge to defend him surprised me, but I wasn't surprised when he said, "I have a quick email to send then I'll be right there."

  That email, as I'd expected, hit my computer moments after he settled at her desk.

  Flipper, I hope you don't mind me helping her. It's mostly just to save us the whining on Monday WHEN she doesn't get the job. But if it bothers you, say the word and I'm out.

  I looked up to see him watching me even though Patricia was babbling away about her site, and I smiled, rolled my eyes, and gave him a small thumbs-up.

  He smiled back and turned his focus to Patricia's computer screen, and I realized that my gesture could have been taken either way. He'd understood me, though. We understood each other.

  I indulged myself and watched him work for a few seconds. His patience with Patricia was unbelievable. When he went out on his own he'd have no problem getting and keeping clients.

  I'd miss him, though.

  He raised his head and caught me staring.

  I felt my cheeks go hot and I looked away. I could feel him still watching me, though, so I peeked over again.

  He winked at me.

  I giggled out loud.

  Patricia turned her scowling face toward me.

  "Sorry," I said, my cheeks blazing even more. "Just saw something funny."

  She grunted and went back to work, and I glared at Percy.

  He winked again, and my glare fell apart because I couldn't stop myself grinning at him.

  I held my hand up in front of my eyes to block my view, making it clear I'd be ignoring him from now on, and clicked on the presentation program.

  By the time it loaded, though, I'd decided to do something different, since in the past I'd lost myself in this sort of work for hours on end and wound up with such a stiff neck I could barely move. This time, I wanted to be better to myself. I needed to plan ahead to make that happen.

  Regular breaks would be good, during which I could stretch out my neck and let my eyes relax. I'd thought of such a simple idea before, of course, but I always forgot to take them, so I set my phone's alarm to remind me.

  So simple, and yet so effective. I worked for half an hour then took a few minutes off then set back to work, and it helped more than I could have imagined. The regular stretching kept me from becoming so agonized, and the little breaks also helped me keep my focus high.

  Even with a half-hour off for lunch, by three o'clock I actually felt comfortable enough to help Sasha with her presentation since Patricia refused to let Percy help anyone else until hers was perfect. Sasha wouldn't whine on Monday if she didn't get the job as Patricia would, but she was my friend and watching her struggle didn't feel right.

  Felix came out of his office as I was explaining to Sasha how best to use screenshots of her web site. "Lydia?"

  I looked up. "Yes?"

  He stared at me like I was written in a language he didn't quite understand. "Nothing. Never mind."

  "He thinks you shouldn't help me," Sasha said after he'd left the office to go see his friends.

  "Thanks, Captain Obvious."

  She laughed. "He's probably right too."

  I shook my head. "If I'm going to win, I want to really win. Being all obnoxious about it wouldn't be..." I knew what I meant but I couldn't find the words.

  She smiled. "It wouldn't be good to yourself?"

  Yeah, those were the words.

  Chapter Forty-Eight

  I drove along the winding residential street, seeing couples out for a walk on the freshly cleared sidewalks and noticing all the driveways were plowed too. The ho
uses themselves were small but looked friendly somehow.

  Up ahead I saw Mom at the curb waving, so I pulled in and parked beside her.

  "I'm so glad you could come see it and tell us if you love it," she said the second I opened the door. With an exaggerated shiver, she added, "We're so excited."

  "I see that."

  This particular street hadn't even been on their radar since houses here hardly ever went up for sale, but one had been listed just last night and my parents were only the second people to see it. They'd fallen in love at once, and Mom had called begging me to hurry over to see it and give them my honest opinion. Fortunately, my hard work on the presentation in the office yesterday and all morning and afternoon at home today meant I could afford the time off, although I'd have taken it anyhow since I wanted to see the house.

  Dad stood on the front steps. "Come on in, Lydia. You too, Elizabeth, I suppose."

  Mom nudged me as we walked up to him. "I think I should buy my own house, don't you? And maybe let him visit sometimes. Maybe."

  I giggled and Dad said, "As if he wants to visit. Okay, I'll give you the tour."

  From the front entranceway, tiled with large squares of black slate and painted a calm pale blue that was nearly identical to my mom's current kitchen color, I could see my parents in this house. The kitchen was definitely smaller than what Mom was used to but really well laid out, and the basement had a workshop already that would be perfect for Dad.

  "The management company takes care of the snow removal and also cuts the lawns," Dad said when we'd checked out the whole place and were back in the living room sitting in front of the fireplace. "So, what do you think?"

  I smiled at him. Part of me wanted to tease him and say I hated it, but he'd sounded nervous asking for my opinion and I knew he wanted the house just as much as Mom did. "I think you should buy it. Immediately. It's like it was built for you."

  Mom clapped her hands. "Good girl. Good answer." She turned to Dad. "So?"

  He gave a slow nod. "So let's put in an offer."

  In short order, their real estate agent, way younger than me but clearly good at her job, was walking them through what they needed to know. "I do think you need to offer at least the asking price since this is such a popular neighborhood. If you were willing to go up even a grand or two, that would make the sellers' decision easier."