“Oh shit,” she whispered.
“Jenny, I said enough already with the cursing!” I stopped when I stood face to face with Renee. “Oh shit.”
“Hi, Devin.” She smiled at me smugly as she crossed her arms and worked her neck. “What do you know? I guess you are back in town? Funny thing is—I found out that you never left! What the hell, Devin? I got people calling me all day telling me that you were at a party last night with some fat girl and now you got the nerve to stare back at me like you don’t know who the hell I am! Why haven’t you called me or answered any of my calls? I can’t believe you! I have half a mind to break up with you.”
Great…it was exactly what I needed. Now she wanted to go all psycho girlfriend on me. What is it with women and marking their territory? Renee was perfectly fine being a fuck buddy until she thought that someone else was moving in. She was acting exactly like I thought she would and I was about three seconds from telling her to go straight to Hell, but Jenny spoke before I could.
I saw that angry spark hit Jenny’s eyes and I knew it was going to be bad the minute I saw her hand come up and the outraged look on her face.
“OK, first of all, don’t you ever yell at my brother like that because I will climb your tall lanky ass like a tree! Second of all, nobody even likes you, so the best thing that could…”
I cut her off by grabbing her arm.
“Jenny, let me deal with this,” I said as I turned back to Renee. I almost laughed at the shocked look on her face.
“Are you gonna let her talk to me like that?” Renee asked in anger.
“Renee, whatever we had going on is over. The only reason I let it go on as long as I did was because you were a quick and easy lay,” I said calmly. I turned toward Jenny. “Come on, let’s go pay for this and get out of here.”
“Wait a minute! You’re not serious!” Renee called out. “You are breaking it off with me?” She stabbed herself in the chest with her too long fingernail. “Oh. My. God. This is epic! You, a dirty old garage boy and me, the hottie with a body! This is so funny I can’t even…”
Her next words never made it out of her mouth and for once I didn’t punish Jenny for acting like a boy. Renee never knew what hit her. I taught Jenny how to throw a punch and I’ll be damned if she didn’t throw one that landed right in the center of Renee’s face.
She covered her bloody nose with freshly manicured fingers. Bright red blood covered the white tips of her long nails.
“You broke my nose you little dike!” Her cries were muffled.
I had to pull Jenny back as she went in for another hit. She wasn’t having it, so I lifted her and carried her out. She fought and cursed the entire time.
We slipped out as store employees came to help Renee. After an hour of shopping, we left our buggy full of groceries in the aisle.
Later that night, I got a shower and then relaxed in my bed. My life was going straight down the shitter. We were about to lose everything, I had just broken it off with my semi-girlfriend/side piece, and now the one female that I actually enjoyed being around didn’t want anything to do with me. The shitter.
There was a light tap at my door that broke into my deep thoughts.
“Yeah,” I called out.
Jenny walked in and handed me a Twizzler.
“You OK?” she asked as she snapped off the end of her Twizzler with her teeth and started to chew.
“Yeah, I’ll live.”
“So…this new girl that you won’t let me meet, is it because she’s overweight?”
“What?” I started to panic.
Alarms went off. How the hell does Jenny know anything about Lilly’s size? Does Jenny know what I’ve been up to?
“Renee said you were at a party with a fat girl and I just kind of figured that maybe that’s why you won’t let me meet her. Devin, you know me and dad don’t care about stuff like that. I think it’s great.”
I felt a sudden burst of relief. The last thing I wanted was for my sister and my dad to know what a complete and total ass I really was.
“Yeah, she’s a little on the plus side, but that’s not why I haven’t let you meet her. We just aren’t in that zone, yet. Technically we aren’t in any zone anymore because she won’t talk to me.”
“Send her something nice. I’m not the most girly-girl in the world, but I know I’d like for a guy to send me something nice, especially if he did something to piss me off. When Josh does something, he sends me candy.” She held up her Twizzler. “He accidently broke my Gameboy today at school,” she shrugged.
“Josh cares about you, Jen.” I shook my head and laughed at her enlarged eyes. “I’ll think about sending her something nice. Go get in bed, you got school tomorrow. I’ll see you in the morning, OK?”
I watched as my little sister, who now seemed so grown up, walked out of my bedroom. I jumped up and immediately when to my dresser and snatched up the little jewelry box that I got from Franklins Jewelry store the day I met Lilly.
I popped it open and stared down at the little locket. It really was perfect for her. I smiled to myself.
A week later, there was still no communication between Lilly and me. Of course, I’d given up on calling her. I knew the best thing for me to do was to just forget about her. That whole date someone for money thing was a bad idea to start with, not to mention it kind of backfired in my face considering that I was starting to really like Lilly.
I got an expected visit from Lilly’s mom. I wasn’t living up to my end of the bargain, and at this point, I didn’t care anymore. I was already starting to think of new options. Maybe after we lost the house we could rent a place for a while or maybe move to Georgia and stay with some family until dad and I got back on our feet. I had already started looking for a better paying job while still helping to maintain the garage, just in case a miracle occurred.
“A deal’s a deal, Devin. My daughter’s miserable. What did you do and how are you going to fix it?” She picked at a piece of lint on her perfect coat.
“I didn’t do anything. She hates me. She should hate me after what I was attempting to do. The deal’s off, and I don’t care if we lose everything. I can’t do it.”
She took a deep frustrated breath and pinched the bridge of her nose like I was causing her a headache.
“Look, her birthday’s this weekend. There’s going to be a big party at my house—I can’t believe I’m about to do this, but please come to the party.”
“I can’t do this, it’s wrong and she’s really a nice girl, I just don’t…”
“Twenty thousand,” she said. She was now rubbing her temple.
“What?” I almost choked on my own spit.
“I will personally hand you a check for twenty thousand dollars if you do this, that doesn’t include the money I’ve already given you.”
“You’re fucking nuts, lady!” I ran my hands roughly through my hair in frustration. “Let me think on it.”
Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Why? Why? Why?
She pulled out a card and handed it to me. I looked down and it had her name and address on it.
“Call me when you figure out whether you want to be a man and take care of your family or not.”
Then she was gone.
I made that decision later that night. After a hard day of work in the garage, I ran into the house and saw my dad sitting at the kitchen table. I could tell by the slump of his body that he was drunk as a skunk, but the tears on his cheeks are what really did me in.
“What kind of man am I, Devin?” he slurred. “I can’t even take care of my own damn family. We’re gonna lose it, all of it, and it’s my own fault. I’m not a man, I’m a drunk. She made me this way, your momma. She made me this way. I was a good man, Devin, I was, and she made me this way.” He pressed his forehead against the table and cried until he passed out.
Jenny helped me drag his limp body to the couch.
It’s been years since I’ve seen my father cry, not since right after mom
walked out on us. In that moment the wall around my heart hardened immediately. Seeing him that way gave me a fresh new outlook and reminded me what women were capable of. I couldn’t allow Lilly’s innocent attack on my senses to take over. She was a woman…they hurt you and they leave you. They were only good for one thing and I would not be doing that one thing with Lilly. I’m not some wet-behind-the-ears pussy boy. I’m Devin Michaels, the playboy of the south, and it’s about damn time I started acting that way. I don’t know why I ever doubted myself to begin with. I knew what needed to be done and it was time I manned up and did it before my family lost everything.
I barely made it into my bedroom before I pulled the card out of my pocket and grabbed my cell phone. I dialed the number and waited. It rang twice before she picked up.
“I’ll do it,” I said before rudely hanging up.
Thirteen
Birthday Wishes
I stuffed another spoon full of cookies and cream into my fat trap. Ice cream makes me happy, I wasn’t happy, hence the ice cream. Is it even possible to really be that into someone after such a short period of time? He’s all I can think about. Does that make me crazy? Like, should I reach someone at the local mental health institution? I felt like I was losing my mind.
I haven’t been this depressed since I was a miserable teenage punching bag. I guess realizing that I wanted something that Devin didn’t want brought back too many old memories—memories and emotions I thought I buried so many years ago.
“Put down the ice cream, Lilly. A customer’s coming in and he’s sexy with a capital S,” Shannon said as she tried to get a better peek at the new customer.
The bell above the door rang out. I sat down my life force of cookies and cream, wiped my mouth and headed to the front of the store. I stopped dead in my tracks when I was met with a pair of dazzling blue eyes.
“Hey there, sweet cheeks, fancy meetin’ you here.” Matt smiled his slanted smile.
I can only imagine what my face looked like in that moment. I adjusted my shirt and stepped up to the counter.
“Hey, Matt. It’s good to see you again. What can I do for you?”
“Ah, how sweet…you remembered my name. I didn’t think you would’ve remembered anything with as much as you had to drink that night,” he joked.
Shannon cleared her throat.
“I see you have this taken care of, I’ll just be in the back if you need me,” she said as she left to go to the back of the store.
“You’re looking good today, Lilly. Did you do something different with your hair?” He tilted his head and worked that mind-shattering smile.
He’s good, but Devin’s better.
I could feel my face starting to burn as I cleared my throat nervously.
“Um—is there something you were looking for?” I tried to change the subject back to his purpose at the jewelry store.
“Nope, I came here looking for you.”
The butterflies in my stomach were having one hell of a party and for a minute I couldn’t think of a response. He knew what he was doing to me, I could tell by his satisfied expression. He ran his eyes down my body and then back up before smiling. He sucked in his bottom lip and then ran his tongue across his top lip.
It was shameless and kind of tacky. It was different from Devin’s smooth seductive manor. Matt was trying too hard…Devin didn’t have to try.
“Well, here I am, now what can I do for you,” I repeated.
“You can go out with me this Saturday night,” he cocked his perfectly shaped eyebrow at me.
“Excuse me?”
No way was this happening. Just weeks ago I was approached by Devin, who is probably the sexiest man I’ve ever seen, and now today the second sexiest man I’ve ever seen is standing in front of me asking me to go out with him. I must have heard him wrong.
“I want to take you out, unless of course you and Devin are still…”
“No! Devin and I aren’t anything,” I said too quickly.
Great now it was probably obvious that I was totally falling for Devin. What can I say? I’m a master at being calm, cool, and collected. Not!
“I actually have something I have to do this Saturday night. I’m sorry, maybe some other time.” I mustered as nicely as possible.
Sure he looked tastier than that pint of cookies and cream that was probably melting in the back of the store. Sure, the way he eyed me made me want to throw myself at him and beg him for things that I have absolutely no clue about, but my achy girl parts were thanks to Devin, not Matt, and there was no way in the good name of Ben and Jerry’s that I was going to take that road again.
I don’t know why, but for some crazy, unknown reason hot men were throwing themselves in front of me. Thanks, but no thanks. I’d rather spare myself the drama. I may not know what the hell Devin wanted, but I know exactly what Matt the muscular man -whore wants and I think I’ll pass on my turn to take a spin on that tilt-a-whirl.
At least that was my plan. Apparently, Shannon had other plans.
“Lil, why don’t you invite your new friend to your birthday party Saturday night?” She wasn’t really paying any attention to us as she started to stock things behind the counter.
For that reason she missed it when I gave her our secret shut up look. You know the bug-eyed tight mouth look that everyone gives to their not so smart, speak before they think, friends.
“I love birthday parties,” Matt said.
How is it possible to make a single sentence, like that one, sound like a sexual invitation? Where does one learn a skill like that?
“You—you do?” I stuttered.
“Oh yes. So, are you gonna invite me? I’ll make sure to give you something really good for your birthday,” he whispered.
Needless to say, I now had a date to my birthday party Saturday night. Thank you very much loud-mouthed Shannon!
Even though I prayed that the time would go slowly, Saturday rapidly approached and I was getting dressed for the big, unnecessary birthday party. Honestly, I’d rather hang out with the girls watching movies all night. I have no desire to spend the night of my birthday in a room full of people who only consider me a friend because they think that my mother’s rich.
The doorbell rang and then I heard muffled voices.
“Lilly! Matt’s here!” She called through our small apartment.
I finished getting dressed and then threw on my shoes. I checked the mirror one more time. I grabbed my bag and made my way into the living room. Matt’s eyes lit up when he saw me and for a minute I let myself enjoy the compliment his eyes gave me.
“Wow, you look hot,” he blurted out.
I smiled and blushed.
We walked to his car. He opened the car door for me and closed it once I was seated. The inside of his car smelled like a brand new car. Hell, his car was brand new. I’m not sure what kind of car it was, but who cared? I found myself missing the old rusted Camaro and the smell of motor oil. Devin.
When we pulled up to my mom’s house I had a sudden burst of nerves. Not that I mind being the center of attention in a room full of friends, but even though my friends would be there, it was still mostly a room full of my mom’s ritzy acquaintances. Joy!
Matt grabbed my hand on the walk up the marble front steps to the front door. I wanted to pull my hand away from him, but I figured that would be rude. His hands were hard and cold. Devin’s are firm, but warm, another difference between the two. I already know before I make it to the door that I’m going to be comparing all night. I don’t know what it is, but something about Matt just doesn’t seem right.
Soon, it was an hour into the party. I’d survived this long without any long term damage, plus, I’d already had a few glasses of champagne down my throat so I was a little more relaxed. I even let Matt pull me into the middle of the enormous room, which was decorated in pink and black. There was some slow song playing and I let myself relax against Matt as he led me around.
I felt him pull me a l
ittle closer and for a minute I contemplated walking away. Instead, I relaxed my head against his shoulder. Bad idea!
“You smell good,” he whispered into my ear.
“Thank you,” I said.
“Vanilla and cherries, that’s what you smell like,” he said as he ran his mouth against my ear.
I watched my arm as the goose bumps formed. I couldn’t help it. I hated my reaction to him, but Devin had my body primed for sex and it’s all I could think about anymore.
Please, let this night be over with soon.
I closed my eyes for a minute and imagined it was Devin I was dancing with. I’m well aware of the fact that Matt is hot, but he’s not warm. I don’t mean physically warm, but warm inside. It doesn’t make any sense. I kept my eyes closed for just another few seconds and enjoyed the thoughts of Devin.
Finally, I brought my head back up and looked around the room. The green eyes that stared back at me caught me off guard. The man of my imaginings was standing across the room from me and everything about Devin was right. The relaxed fit jeans he was wearing, the black buttoned up shirt he was wearing, and the smile that he should’ve been wearing would’ve been perfect as well. The only problem was he wasn’t smiling at all. The problem was he looked completely pissed off.
Fourteen
The Party Crasher
I showed up late to the party. I figured better late than never. Also, it took me at least two hours to persuade myself to go through with it. With a hardened heart and a mission, I walked into the secret lair of the she-devil. There were so many people there that I had to slip and slide through the crowd just to make it to the main room.
I looked around at the richly dressed people and then down at my jeans. Oh well. I grabbed a glass of something from a man that was walking by with a tray and then slowly made my way through the room. It didn’t take long for me to spot Lilly from across the room. She looked so pretty and I had a sudden urge to be near her. My hardened heart slowly softened at the sight of her. Lilly…my Lilly.
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