Got Mine (Men of Trance Book 1)

by Nicole Loufas

  From the look on her face, I know exactly what she thought.

  “I moved on,” I remind her.

  “Clearly,” she spits. “So, you love her?”

  “Yeah, I do.” That is my truth.

  Leeyan makes a face like she doesn’t believe me. She steps forward, and I move back until I’m up against the sink. She knows me. My weaknesses, my fantasies. This woman was the girl of my dreams. We’ve done things to each other, said things I thought I’d never say to another human. She knows about the time I woke up in the middle of the night and found my mom’s boyfriend in my room. I never told anyone about that night, not even Giovanni. Other than my mother, Leeyan is the only person who’s seen me cry.

  I’m actually pretty amazed by the fact that I can stand inches away from her and not take her in my arms. I’m not the only one who’s changed physically. Her hair is naturally wavy; at this length, she looks like one of those pin-up models from the twenties. It’s kind of hot. She’s tanner than her normal color. Factor in her toned body—I bet she looks killer in a bikini.

  “You look good,” she finally says. “I guess that goes with the job though, right?” She reaches up and squeezes my bicep. I flex, and she laughs.

  “You look fit.” It seems like an appropriate compliment.

  “Thanks.” She pauses and lets her hand slide down my arm. “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.”

  I’m speechless for a few seconds before I remember how to speak. “Good night, Leeyan.”

  She steps back as if she were holding me hostage. “Night, Theo.”

  I’m at the club for rehearsal with Ivy and the guys. We’re learning a new routine to a popular country song. Jimmy likes to switch things up every few months. It gives the women a reason to come back.

  “Sway, you’re leading the group in, so stand there.” Ivy points to my mark. “You’re the first on, last off.” She says this like it’s something special. I can’t get excited; I’m worried about Lulu.

  I let Leeyan take her out today. It isn’t like I have a choice, she is her mother. Lulu hasn’t warmed up to Leeyan. Sylvie blames herself. She says being around Lulu when Leeyan is here makes things complicated. So she’s been staying away, and it’s killing me. I haven’t seen Sylvie all week, and now Rico sprung a last-minute side job on me tonight. I really need the money. It’s been a slow month, and rent is due. I don’t want Leeyan to think I’m struggling. As long as I keep doing the side jobs, I’ll stay afloat.

  “Alright, that’s all for today,” Ivy says. “Jimmy has an announcement, so hang out a minute.”

  She leaves to get Jim, and I sit down because the cowboy boots we have to wear are killing me. We walk out in boots, ripped jeans, and a flannel shirt. Ivy thinks we should add cowboy hats. We vetoed her suggestion and went with worn baseball caps.

  “S’up, Sway.” Giovanni sits next to me. “Leeyan still driving you nuts?” He offers me a bottle of water.

  I wave his hand away. “You know she is.” I pull my boots off. “It doesn’t help that Dennis let her move into the apartment upstairs.”

  “Hey, at least she can’t hear you and Sylvie banging.” Giovanni laughs.

  That would be a good thing if I were actually banging Sylvie.

  “Alright, listen up, children.” Jimmy walks up on stage. “I got a photographer coming tomorrow for new promo shots.” He looks at me. “Sway is going on the wall.”

  The guys clap and congratulate me. Getting my face on the wall means I’m in the permanent rotation to close the show. I’ll also be featured on Trance’s Facebook page. This honor usually leads to more privates and more money. Jimmy rattles off the details of the shoot then tells us not to be late.

  “That’s my, dude.” Rico holds his hand out and I high-five him.

  “Thanks, man. Tell me about tonight. I’m not gonna be blindsided again, am I?” I ask that every time Rico gives me a job.

  “Nah, man. This is an out-of-town businesswoman who needs a date for a cocktail party.”

  “What do I wear?” I ask as I tie my shoes.

  “Business casual.”

  Rico assumes I know what this means.

  “Like khakis and a polo shirt?”

  Rico looks at Gio like I’m crazy. “What, do you work at Target? Fucking business casual,” he says again.

  “I’ll Google it.” I pull out my phone.

  “Think Banana Republic,” Giovanni says and stands up. “If you need to borrow something, I can stop by with a few shirts after I hit the gym.”

  I scroll through the images on my phone and hold it so Rico and Giovanni can see.

  “This one,” Rico says. “You have that blue button-down—wear it with dark jeans and dress shoes. Do you have a sports coat?”

  “I have one,” Giovanni offers. “It’s that Gucci one from the fashion show.”

  “You fucking lifted that?” Rico asks. He looks pissed or jealous.

  “Fuck yeah, I did. They underpaid us.” Giovanni tosses his bag over his shoulder. “I’ll stop by around four.” He leaves, and Rico moves into his chair.

  “There’s one more thing about this job,” Rico says. “She might ask you to stay the night.” He braces for my wrath. “She just wants you to stay in her room and watch her sleep.”

  “Did you tell her I don’t do overnights?”

  “No, because there’s a chance she won’t ask.”

  Great. If she does ask and I say no, she’ll be pissed. I don’t need any more female drama.

  “Maybe Dain should do this one. He’s used to the kinky shit.”

  Rico looks towards the corner, where Dain is sitting alone. “He’s going through some shit.”

  “We all are,” I inform him. “I shouldn’t even be doing this job tonight.”

  “I booked you because she’s a big tipper. I didn’t want you to miss out on a fat payday.” Rico stands. “Just show up, look pretty, and be a good boy.”

  ***

  I’m walking up my block when I see Giovanni pull over in front of my building. I’m waiting to cross the street when he jumps out and runs up the stairs. He doesn’t knock on my door. He goes to the door on the left, Leeyan’s door, and walks inside. I pause and try to wrap my head around what is happening. I take my phone out and check the time. Minutes click by, six of them before Gio opens the door again. He walks to his car holding a jacket. He pops the trunk and puts the jacket inside, then gets in the car and drives away. Giovanni was supposed to drop off a coat for me, not leave with one.

  My phone buzzes in my hand. It’s a text from Rico with the address and details for my job tonight. The time was moved up an hour, which means I have less than sixty minutes to shower and change.

  I walk into my flat and smell chicken. Reese runs out of my bedroom towards me.

  “Hey, buddy.” He smiles and keeps moving forward as if he can’t stop. When he reaches me, I scoop him up and notice a new tooth. His hair is longer and lighter. “Where’s Mommy at, huh?”

  I walk into the kitchen and find Sylvie draining fettuccine noodles in the sink. That’s what smells so good.

  “Hey babe,” she says and puckers up for a kiss. I lean in and kiss her softly then rest my head on hers. Over the smell of chicken and Alfredo sauce, I smell her perfume. It’s the one she used to wear when she was dancing. My favorite.

  “God, I missed you.” I place one arm around her and hold Reese with the other. “And you smell…” I lean down and kiss her again. This time, I slip her my tongue. She grabs my ass and pulls me deeper into her mouth.

  She pulls away first and goes back to her noodles. I haven’t seen Sylvie smile like this in a long time. Not since Leeyan came back.

  “Go shower, dinner is almost ready,” she demands. “What time is Lulu supposed to be home?”

  Oh shit, she doesn’t know I booked a job for tonight.

  “Uh, she’s not.”

  I place Reese on the floor, and he runs out of the room. Smart man.

 
“I asked Leeyan to keep her for the night.”

  Sylvie dumps the noodles back into the pot, then adds the sauce. “Oh, so I guess things are better between them now.” Her shoulders slump as she tosses the noodles in the sauce. “It’s good for Lulu.”

  I turn her around. “Hey, what’s the matter?”

  She stares at my chest. “I miss her. Reese misses her too.” She wraps her arms around my waist and holds me. I really want to take her to my room, but I don’t have time. It kills me to tell her I have to leave.

  “I was thinking,” she says quietly. “I would take you up on your offer and move in.”

  “Are you sure?” I question because she was so adamant about keeping her own space. I don’t want her to move in just because my ex-girlfriend lives upstairs.

  “I love you, Theo.” She squeezes tighter as if she’s afraid to let me go. I’ve never seen her this vulnerable. Sylvie has always been a badass independent woman. That’s what I love about her.

  I lift her chin and kiss her softly. She presses her breasts against me, and I’m reminded that it’s been two weeks since we’ve had sex. Our kiss morphs from tender to ravenous. We move away from the stove. The table knocks against the wall as I push against her. Sylvie wraps her legs around my waist and kisses my neck.

  “Fuck me, Theo,” she whispers in my ear.

  I pull back and let her up. She walks to the bedroom, and I go check on Reese. I find him eating stale Cheez-Its in Lulu’s room.

  “Come on, buddy.” I carry him to the living room. “Me and mommy need some play time.” I place Reese in his playpen.

  I walk back to the bedroom and find Sylvie naked in the center of the bed. I kick the door closed and leap on top of her. When Sylvie laughs, her face glows. She’s my magical muse again. The woman that pulled me from the darkness and taught me how to love.

  “I love you so fucking much.” I declare as I take my clothes off. I hover above her and my cock slides between her legs. She’s wet and ready for me. “I want this forever.”

  “Yes,” she replies in that breathless, sexy-as-fuck way women do when you ask them a question during sex. When they agree to anything, you say. “I’m yours, Theo. Forever.”

  I feel her tighten around me. She whimpers the way she used to before the kids; when sex was loud and dirty and went on for hours. I could go two or three times a night. Thinking about coming takes me to the edge. I slow down to get control.

  She’s on the pill, so we don’t use condoms anymore. I want to kiss the motherfucker who created birth control pills. He or she made it possible for me to feel Sylvie this way.

  I’m working my way back to full throttle when I hear my phone ring from down the hall. It’s probably Rico making sure I got his text. I put the job and Rico out of my mind and concentrate on Sylvie. I look down at her breasts; it helps. I find my rhythm again, and Sylvie starts to build momentum. If I get this right, we’ll come together. She grips my waist and arches her back.

  She’s close; I’m closer.

  The bed is banging the wall, and neither of us cares until Reese starts to cry.

  “I’m coming,” I groan.

  Sylvie wraps her arms around me as I fall on top of her. She kisses my shoulder, and we lay still for a few seconds, enjoying the fact that we’re together.

  The pleasure is short lived.

  Reese starts to yell. He’s a yeller now.

  Sylvie moves from beneath me and pulls my t-shirt over her head. As she looks for her panties, the front door opens.

  “Daddy!” Lulu yells.

  “Oh shit.” I jump out of bed and grab a pair of sweats from the end of the bed.

  Lulu’s footsteps pound down the hall and stop at my door. It cracks open just as Sylvie gets her jeans on.

  “Hey there, beautiful.” Sylvie picks up Lulu. “I missed you.”

  “How come you didn’t come over?” Lulu questions.

  “Because I got a job at the big hospital.”

  I look at Sylvie to see if she’s serious. “For real?”

  “Yes,” she nods. “I found out today. I thought we could celebrate.”

  Lulu cheers as Sylvie puts her down and they disappear into the hall. “Do you have cake?” Lulu asks.

  “No, but I made your favorite din—oh hey Leeyan.” Sylvie’s tone changes. “I didn’t know you were here.”

  “Giovanni let me in.”

  I walk down the hall just as Leeyan hands Reese to Sylvie.

  “Where is Gio?” I look into the living room.

  “He’s parking the car,” she says. Her eyes dart away like she can’t look at me. “I caught him outside, and he asked me to bring this inside for you.” She hands me the jacket.

  “What’s that for?” Sylvie questions.

  Before I answer, Giovanni walks through the door. I remember what I saw earlier. He smiles at the three of us standing in the narrow hall.

  “Something smells good,” he says. “What’s up, Sylvie.” He gives her a kiss on the cheek.

  Sylvie tells Giovanni she made chicken fettuccine and invites him to stay.

  “You know I can’t say no to your cooking.” He follows Sylvie into the kitchen, and Leeyan gives him a dirty look behind his back.

  “What’s with you two?” I ask her.

  “Nothing.” She snorts as if I'm ridiculous. “What’s going on down here with you?”

  “Nothing.”

  “I can hear the banging upstairs.”

  “So, is it a crime to fuck my girlfriend?” I whisper.

  Leeyan’s face turns red. “It is if my daughter is in the apartment. Do you always lock up the kids while you have sex?”

  She motions to Reese in his playpen.

  “It isn’t like that,” I start to explain. “You wouldn’t understand since you don’t know what it’s like to raise kids.”

  “Daddy,” Lulu calls from down the hall.

  “Yeah, baby.” I walk into her room and find her looking at the wall.

  “My mommy said you were hanging new pictures, but I don’t see them.” She shrugs her little shoulders, and I start laughing.

  I back out of the room and look at Leeyan. “That’s what Mommy said, huh? Mommy was mistaken, but you can’t blame her, it’s probably been a long time since someone hung pictures with her.”

  Leeyan is fuming when I return to the hall.

  Giovanni walks past us towards the living room with a plate. He pauses when he sees me still holding the jacket.

  “Hey, jackass, don’t you have a job to get to?” He looks at his watch. “It’s almost four.”

  I hang the jacket on my doorknob and walk into the bathroom. I don’t even have time to explain to Sylvie. I have to shower, shave, and get the fuck out of here in fifteen minutes.

  ***

  I’m finishing up when Sylvie walks into the bedroom. She sits on the bed and watches me button my shirt.

  “Did you forget to tell me something?” She doesn’t look upset.

  “I’m sorry, Rico sprung it on me last minute.” I tuck my shirt in and buckle my belt. “It’s a lot of money.”

  “Yeah, Giovanni told me.” Sylvie gets up and pulls the jacket off the hanger. She hands it to me and smiles. “She’s a big tipper.”

  “No sex or nudity.” I put the jacket on and survey myself in the mirror. Dark jeans, blue shirt, brown jacket, desperate jerk-off that’ll do anything for money. Check.

  “I trust you,” Sylvie says.

  For the first time since we I started working at the club and doing side jobs with Rico; I feel like my line is blurred. With Leeyan back, I can’t show that I don’t have everything under control. I need this money more than ever. Aside from sex, I’ll do whatever is required of me to get paid.

  “I know, and you can trust me,” I assure her.

  Sylvie catches the apprehension in my tone. She’s been in my situation; she understands the moral dilemmas that come with the job. Some things are minor, like lap dances and casual dinners.
When someone asks me to rub her feet, or shave her legs, or cuddle all night, I put myself in Sylvie’s shoes. I think about how I would feel if she did those things with another man. Even though it feels like a knife in the chest, I have to oblige them. As much as I love Sylvie, I want to provide for Lulu even more.

  “We can celebrate another night,” she says. “With cake.”

  I take her in my arms and kiss her head. “Why don’t you and Reese stay here tonight.”

  “Really?”

  “I like the idea of coming home to you.” It’s true. Walking in the door and seeing Reese in the hall, the smell of dinner in the kitchen—it was nice. “I think we should live together.”

  Sylvie hugs my waist.

  “Not here. I don’t want to live under Leeyan.”

  “My place is too small for all of us,” she reminds me. “And there’s too many Aaron memories.”

  “Then we’ll start fresh. We’ll find a place of our own.”

  “I like the sound of that.” Sylvie kisses my cheek.

  I walk down the hall to say goodbye to Lulu and find Giovanni sitting in the living room. “Good, you’re still here. I need a ride.”

  Giovanni stands up with his empty plate. “No problem, bro.” He checks me out as he walks to the kitchen. “I knew that jacket would fit now that you have a little muscle.”

  I turn back to Leeyan and catch her checking me out. “Are you gonna stay here and hang out or what?”

  “Lulu doesn’t want me to leave.” She points to Lulu inside Reese’s playpen.

  The kids look at me with matching grins.

  “Bye, Daddy.” Lulu stands to kiss me.

  Reese mimics her and stands up too.

  “Where are you going?” Leeyan asks. Everyone ignores her.

  “Say ‘bye bye Dad-dy,’” Lulu coaches Reese.

  Sylvie walks into the room just as Reese attempts to call me Daddy. Her face is white with horror.

  “Lulu, no,” she corrects. “Theo is your daddy, not Reese’s.”

  Lulu makes a pouty face. Not like she’s going to cry, more like she’s pissed. “He calls him Daddy when we play family.” Everyone stops and listens to Lulu. “I’m the big sister, Reese is the baby, you are the daddy, and Sylvie is the mommy.”