The Surprise Party

by Sue Welfare

  ‘We’re talking about Sadie and Tucker, not a herd of gazelle,’ she said miserably. ‘They’ve got to be around here somewhere.’

  ‘We know where they’re going,’ said Simon.

  ‘Yes, I know that, but I was hoping we could catch up with them before they get to my grandma’s rather than after,’ growled Hannah.

  ‘Whoa there, keep your head on. I was only saying,’ Simon said, as Hannah straightened up and headed off across the grass.

  ‘I know, I’m sorry. I’m just cranky – I feel like shit, my head aches, I still feel sick and, even as we speak, two drunken people who my mum like totally hates are about to gatecrash her big-night-out, no-expense-spared family party. Talk about a bloody disaster . . .’

  ‘She hates Tucker?’ said Simon in surprise. ‘I didn’t know that.’

  ‘No, well, not really, not Tucker so much, but she really doesn’t like Sadie and if he’s Sadie’s friend, and he’s with her – well, you get my drift. Come on, let’s get a move on. We might still be able to catch them up.’

  Simon dropped into an easy loping jog while Hannah struggled to keep going at any pace at all. They headed over the football pitch, up between the swings, and out onto the footpath which eventually led up to the lane that wound its way back to her grandparents’ house. It felt as if they had been going for hours by the time they rounded the final corner before home. And as they did, Hannah spotted Tucker and Sadie way up ahead of them, letting themselves into the garden through back gate. Surely they should have waited for her so they could all go in together, hadn’t that been the plan? Hannah called out but evidently they didn’t hear.

  ‘Come on, we’ve got to try to catch them up before my mum sees them,’ Hannah yelled to Simon, breaking into a run which made her body scream in complaint.

  Not that she needed to encourage him; Simon took off at a gallop. Hannah sighed; if only she could move that fast.

  *

  Fabulous food, was the general consensus as the party inside the marquee started to warm up. People began to settle down now that Jack and Rose had finally appeared and everyone was eating. Music played and conversation flowed while obliging and cheery young waiters and waitresses moved among the tables carrying great platters of vegetables and salads to top up anyone who felt they had missed out on anything. More staff circulated, checking on the state of play vis-à-vis the wine, and generally everyone seemed to be having a fine old time.

  ‘It was an absolute masterstroke you booking Matt,’ said Rose, popping a sliver of smoked salmon into her mouth, as Sam reached across to top up their wine with the last of the white.

  ‘Having a good time?’ Suzie asked.

  Rose nodded. ‘Oh yes, you know we like a party. Although it was such a surprise. You’ve done wonders between you. I mean, just look at it.’ She held up her hands to encompass the marquee, their guests and all that went with it. ‘You know, your dad and me had no idea, no idea at all.’ Rose had already polished off a couple of glasses of wine and it was starting to show. ‘I don’t think I’ve ever had buffet food quite as nice as this before. It’s absolutely amazing – he’s very good, isn’t he?’

  ‘Who, Matt?’

  Rose nodded. Her mum leant in a little closer. ‘And I’m so sorry about all the other stuff.’ The words weren’t quite slurred but near as damn it.

  ‘Sorry?’

  ‘You know, the divorce and everything. We really should have said something sooner.’

  Suzie touched her arm. ‘It’s all right, Mum, and maybe now isn’t the moment. We can talk about it later.’ She glanced up at the banner announcing their forty years together.

  Rose, following her gaze, smiled. ‘You’re most probably right – but this food is still fantastic.’

  Meanwhile, Sam was trying to attract the attention of one of the waitresses to get another bottle of wine.

  ‘I can absolutely understand why you want to do some more work with Matt, Suzie. I mean, he’s such a nice man, so charming, and his staff are just lovely. And this new project of yours, you and him – it’s just so exciting. I’ve been thinking about it and I know it’s all very hush-hush but—’

  Before she could say anything else, Suzie said hurriedly, ‘Have you tried one of these little chicken parcels? They’re fantastic. The chickens are all free range and raised by a friend of Matt’s on the other side of Swaffham. We’re hoping to have some of them down at the walled garden. I’ll get you one.’

  Rose giggled; she was no drinker. ‘A chicken?’

  ‘No, not a chicken, Mum, a chicken parcel,’ Suzie said with a laugh as she got to her feet. ‘Do you want to come with me? See if there is any more of that smoked salmon?’

  ‘Oh good idea,’ said Rose, pushing herself to her feet, her mind sliding gracefully away from hush-hush projects.

  *

  Outside in the garden, Hannah had almost caught up with Sadie and Tucker. She and Simon hurried across the grass to where Sadie and Tucker were hovering out the back of the marquee.

  In the seconds since they had let themselves in, Sadie had managed to light up a cigarette and Tucker was lying flat on his belly, trying to peer in under the canvas of the marquee. Hannah couldn’t work out whether they were waiting for her to show up or trying to work out what to do next.

  ‘What kept you?’ said Sadie, through a great curl of cigarette smoke. She had the remains of the bottle of vodka and Coke tucked under her arm.

  ‘I thought you were going to wait for me.’

  ‘Well, we were but we didn’t. You know how it is. Lover-boy here said you’d be fine and besides,’ Sadie added with a salacious grin, ‘I didn’t know how long you two were going to be, if you get my drift.’

  Hannah was too out of breath and too annoyed to think before she spoke. ‘What? Oh right. Are you totally nuts? I’d just thrown up, do you think Simon is some kind of animal? You said we’d all come back together. I thought that was the plan.’

  Sadie pulled a face. ‘Whoa there, Rambo, just calm yourself, we’re all here now, aren’t we?’

  ‘Only because we ran after you. What were you planning to do, gatecrash my grandparents’ party on your own?’

  ‘Look, just chill, will you? It’s no big thing. You said so yourself.’

  ‘I was drunk,’ said Hannah.

  ‘Exactly, but we’re here now and it’s going to be fine,’ said Sadie, acting as if she was the reasonable one in the gang. Glancing down, she said, ‘So what can you see Tucker?’

  Tucker’s attention was focused on the gap under the canvas, but, at the sound of his name, he glanced back over his shoulder to give a report, like a soldier on forward patrol. ‘Looks like everyone’s eating at the moment. Getting their plates, going up to the buffet. This bit behind here where we are is the kitchen – and there’s no one about in there at the moment that I can see. They’re all serving and those who aren’t are having a fag out the back round the other side,’ said Tucker, now addressing Hannah. ‘We saw them go out a minute or two ago, and some bloke taking them a cooler of beer.’

  ‘What about booze? Can you see any booze?’ snapped Sadie, apparently not wanting him to lose sight of why they were there.

  ‘Nah – I think it must be over there in the main bit where all the people are.’

  ‘Yeah,’ said Hannah. ‘The bar’s over on the other side of the tent, near the door.’

  Sadie nodded. ‘Right, so what do you reckon then, Hannah?’

  Hannah looked at her incredulously. ‘What do you mean, what do I reckon?’

  ‘Well, they’re your family. How do you think we should play this? I was thinking that maybe we should walk in, pick up a plate, nice and calm, join the queue for the buffet? Get ourselves a little chow. What do you reckon?’

  ‘Are you totally mad?’ said Hannah. ‘None of you three are invited. None of us is dressed for a party. People are going to notice us walking in, and my mum is going to go totally apeshit.’

  ‘Joke, joking,’ Sadie
said with a nasty little laugh. ‘Or did you lose your sense of humour along with the booze when you threw up?’

  Hannah glared at her, fury making her far bolder than she would normally dare to be where Sadie was concerned. ‘No, I just don’t want to get into any more trouble than I’m already in.’

  ‘Back in the woods you said it would be fine.’

  ‘Well I was wrong. It won’t be fine, trust me,’ Hannah snapped.

  ‘Well get you, little goodie-two-shoes,’ Sadie laughed. ‘The worm’s turning. See, I knew you’d shape up if you hung around with me long enough. So are we walking in then?’

  ‘Or alternatively,’ said Tucker, rolling over onto his back and then flipping up onto his feet. ‘How about I slide in there under the canvas and walk across to the other side of the kitchen, man on a mission, you know, looking as if I know exactly what I’m doing and where I’m going – people don’t challenge you if you do that – then I’ll swing round the corner of the bar and get us some more booze. I’ll just say I’ve been sent to fetch some drinks, just like Hannah did last time. Why not?’

  Hannah stared at him in disbelief. ‘Because no one is going to believe you. You don’t look like you should be here. No one shows up for a fortieth wedding anniversary party like this dressed like that – everyone else is in their best clothes and you’re in cut-offs and skate boots.’

  Tucker looked hurt and zipped up his hoodie, dusting off the last of the grass before setting about straightening his hair by slicking it back with his palms.

  ‘And besides,’ Hannah continued, ignoring his clean-up efforts. ‘I can’t see it working twice. Everyone is in there now. Last time the woman at the bar thought the vodka was for someone outside – same with the champagne. They thought it was for my aunt.’

  ‘May be worth another shot though,’ said Tucker.

  Hannah shook her head. ‘Don’t be so stupid.’

  At these words, Tucker, grinning like a loon, dropped down onto the grass, lay flat on his back and rolled in under the side wall of the marquee like something out of the SAS.

  ‘Oh my God,’ shrieked Hannah, dropping to her hands and knees. ‘Will you come back? Tucker – Tucker, get out of there, get out now!’ she shouted into the void. But it was too late. He had already gone.

  What on earth would her parents say? God, if he got caught she could see her dad calling the police. They’d never let her out again.

  Frantically Hannah tried to crawl in after Tucker but the canvas was far too tightly pegged and so she ended up wedged in a crouch, half in, half out of the marquee, with her shoulders through and tightly wedged inside the tent while her bottom stuck up in the air outside – and how great must that look from Simon and Sadie’s point of view? Tucker had the right idea, it was flat or nothing – so after a split second’s hesitation, Hannah dropped down onto her stomach and dragged herself into the marquee by her fingertips.

  Tucker had been right about there being nobody about in this part of the marquee, which made things easier. Hastily, Hannah got to her feet and brushed the dust and grime from her front. At one end of the kitchen, a flap had been raised in the tent wall and, just as Tucker had said, she could see a group of young men in chef’s whites outside enjoying a cigarette. Which surely must mean supper was more or less over or they’d have been on standby.

  Hannah picked her way past the trestle tables and the bain-maries. Where the hell had Tucker got to? He was a lot quicker on his feet than he looked. This was complete madness. If he got caught, her parents would kill her. Slowly.

  From where she was standing, Hannah could just about see into the main marquee, where all the people were sitting at their tables, eating and drinking, others at the buffet filling their plates. Some of them must have seen her and Tucker roll in under the canvas. What if someone said something and blew the whistle? Hannah could feel her pulse rate lifting; she was going to be in such trouble. She was no more than a few feet away from the top table, although fortunately there was a screen between her and her family, and they were facing the other way but how long would it be before they were spotted? She really needed to find Tucker and get the hell out of there.

  Hannah took a deep breath. Getting into a flat-out panic wasn’t going to help at all, so she made the effort to look as if she was meant to be there. She let the tension ease in her shoulders and then, composed, she strode purposefully across the grass behind the screen towards the back of the bar, all the while keeping an eye out in case anyone spotted her. She was barely half way across the marquee when, glancing back, Hannah spotted Sadie roll in under the canvas, elbows tightly tucked in, followed closely by Simon.

  Oh, for God’s sake. This was going from bad to worse.

  ‘Go back, go back,’ she hissed, waving her arms at them. ‘What the hell do you think you’re doing?’ But they kept on coming and no flapping of arms or frantic eye rolling and face pulling was going to stop them.

  At that exact moment, Matt walked around the side of the screen, deep in conversation with one of the girls who had been working the buffet. They were both carrying empty serving dishes and were obviously on a mission to restock. Hannah froze.

  There was a moment when Matt spotted the two teenagers – Sadie scrambling to her feet, Simon still on the floor – and then, obviously trying to put the pieces together, Matt looked around the rest of the tent and spotted Hannah, who was trying very hard to look nonchalant. As their eyes met, Hannah felt her heart sink.

  ‘Well, hello there. Something to do with you, are they?’ he asked dryly, tipping his chin towards Sadie and Simon, who were now both standing and busily dusting themselves down.

  Hannah nodded, not daring to speak.

  ‘You’ve got to be pretty desperate to crash a fortieth wedding anniversary party. You know your mum and dad have been looking all over for you, don’t you?’ continued Matt.

  Hannah nodded again and did her best to look contrite, which made Matt laugh. Sadie and Simon had the good sense to stay silent.

  ‘So what are you doing round the back here?’ asked Matt. ‘Trying to avoid your parents? We’re still serving supper if you’re hungry. I’m sure we can find somewhere to squeeze your friends in.’

  At this point Tucker reappeared around the side of the panel at the far end of the room. Spotting the three of them apparently waiting for him, and oblivious to Matt, he said, ‘The bloody bar staff are all standing around behind the bar, there’s not a chance in hell of us getting any more booze – unless . . .’ And then he clocked Matt, and shut up like a clam.

  Matt raised his eyebrows and looked at Hannah. ‘Well, hello to you,’ said Matt. ‘And who have we got here, then? Another of your friends?’

  ‘’Lo,’ said Tucker, stuffing his hand in his pockets. ‘I was just—’

  ‘I heard what you were just doing. There’s not a chance in hell of us getting any booze – unless what ?’ prompted Matt.

  Tucker stared at him as if he didn’t quite understand what Matt was saying. Matt’s eyebrows remained raised. ‘Well?’ he asked again. ‘Anyone here want to say anything before I march you all round to see Hannah’s parents?’

  Hannah could see that Sadie was about to say something but she was ahead of her. The last thing they needed now was Sadie getting all smart arsed and lippy.

  ‘Unless we can get someone to get some for us,’ Hannah said hastily, deciding the truth was going to be easier to swallow than any number of lies. ‘We just wanted some booze, you know. Have a bit of a party of our own.’ She squirmed under his unflinching gaze. ‘This is so . . .’

  ‘Dull?’ suggested Matt.

  Hannah nodded. ‘Yeah. It’s not exactly cool, is it?’

  She could see by his expression that Matt would probably concede the point.

  ‘Look, I know what you’re saying, but I can’t get you any booze – and getting your mates to gatecrash your grandparents’ party isn’t the brightest idea I’ve ever come across. I can get you some soft drinks, some foo
d and maybe a couple of cans of beer, if you fancy some, but that’s it. Okay?’

  Hannah eyed him suspiciously; surely it couldn’t be that easy? ‘Are you going to tell my mum I was here?’

  ‘Not unless she asks but I really think you ought to at least put in appearance. Go and eat with them and then slope off later. Take a tip from one who knows – it’s going to get you into a lot less trouble if you roll up a bit late rather than not show up at all. Meanwhile if you three want to go round the back of the marquee I’ll get the guys to sort you out some food.’

  There was silence.

  Matt held up his hands. ‘Okay. It’s up to you. It’s not an open-ended offer, now take it or leave it. I’ve got a lot of other things to do.’

  Hannah glanced from face to face, trying to gauge the reaction of the others.

  Finally it was Sadie who said, ‘Yeah, all right then. Sounds good to me. I’m starving.’

  Which might have been the end of it if Suzie hadn’t popped her head around the edge of the screen at that very moment. ‘Are there any more of those—’ she began but whatever it was she planned to say was blown out of the water when she spotted Hannah.

  ‘What are you doing round here?’ she asked, sounding surprised. ‘We’ve been looking for you – and what on earth’s happened to your clothes? Did you fall over? Your father is beside himself, you said you would stay and give us a hand. You promised, Hannah.’

  Hannah stared at her, desperately trying to come up with something to say. Suzie’s attention moved on to Sadie, Tucker and Simon. ‘Ah,’ she said. ‘I might have guessed.’

  Only Simon tried out a smile. ‘Hello?’ he said brightly.

  Suzie ignored him. Hannah closed her eyes as her mother came round the screen and into the kitchen. Coming right up to her, Suzie said in a very even voice that chilled Hannah to the bone. ‘I think it might be better if we talked about this later, Hannah, don’t you? And you . . .’ Suzie said, turning to glance at the others. ‘I think it would be better if you went home now. This is a family party and I’m afraid Hannah is going to be busy for the rest of the evening.’ Returning her attention to Hannah, Suzie continued, ‘Now if you’d like to go and get yourself some supper . . .’